Chapter 29
Something had changed between Maisie and Wyatt on their walk. I felt it in the bond.
I wanted time with her, too. I’d been spending more time with the kids than with Maisie, not that I minded in the least. All four of them needed our care, and Maisie was only going to settle in if she didn’t worry about her children.
Plus, I liked being able to go dad mode.
Cody shivered, stomping his feet. “My toes are cold.”
“We can head back,” I offered.
Carter had put together a fire in the dugout pit we typically used when we spent time down here. Paisley and Nora had stuck close by with the dogs, staying cozy, but Cody and I had been down at the river’s edge.
We hadn’t caught anything yet, but all in all we’d had a great morning so far.
“Can we go fishing again another day?” Cody asked.
“Sure we can. We can go ice fishing during the winter, too.”
His eyes sparkled with anticipation.
“Did you want to warm your feet by the fire, or would you rather go straight back to the house?”
“House.”
“You’ve got it. High five for a job well done.” I held up my hand.
Cody looked at me curiously. “But we didn’t catch anything.”
“Effort is important too, even if we don’t hit our goal.”
“Oh. Okay.” Cody whacked his hand against mine. “A good job for you too, then.”
I grinned back at him. “I bet Bryan will make us something delicious for lunch when we get home.”
“Bryan,” Cody yelled out, “can we have chicken noodle soup for lunch?”
“Sure we can,” Bryan replied. “I’m pretty sure we have everything for it.”
It didn’t take too long for us to get the horses ready to ride again. The kids and Maisie stayed around the fire to keep warm while we worked, and we doused the flames with river water when it was time to go.
“Do you want to ride with me on the way back?” I asked Maisie, fully aware she was likely to say no considering her connections to the others.
“I’d love to,” she said, surprising me.
We got the kids up in the saddles, Cody riding with Wyatt, Paisley with Carter, and Nora with Maisie, both of them in my lap, with Bryan on his own horse in the middle of our lineup.
“How was your walk?” I asked when we got a little ahead of everyone.
Floral sweetness filled the air. “Enlightening.”
“I’m glad. You’ve been having a lot of enlightening moments.”
She tilted her head to look at me and I couldn’t quite tell if the pink on her cheeks was from the cold or because she was blushing. “Are we going to have one right now?”
“Depends on what that means. Why don’t you tell me a little more about yourself? What did you love doing with your spare time?”
“I didn’t have much of that.”
“What about before?”
“Back in high school, art class was my favorite. I could never take the projects home, but I loved doing them.”
“Any particular medium?”
“Maybe painting. I had fun with everything, but there was something kind of magical about watercolors and pastels.”
I held my breath as she spoke. I’d used to paint a lot, though I hadn’t hauled out my supplies since we’d moved into our house.
Everything was still in the boxes. Carter had the studio space ready for me, but between the horses and throwing myself into being part of the land, I just hadn’t bothered setting it all up.
“It’s been so long since I’ve been able to do any of that,” Maisie continued, “I probably don’t even remember how.”
“Why don’t we take the afternoon to find out?”
She looked back at me again. “You have painting supplies kicking around?”
“I do, actually. This would be the perfect excuse to actually set up the studio. We could both get back into it and see how rusty we’ve gotten over the years.”
“Wait. Really?”
“Yeah. You’d think having such great views would have made me want to take up painting right away, but I mostly found I hated being stuck inside when I could be out in all of this.”
“I’d say that’s fair, though.” Maisie snuggled harder against me, her breath puffing out like she was a small dragon. “I’m still getting used to being able to move freely on the property. Do you go out as often in the winter?”
“Most days,” I replied. “Good to keep the trails clear, keep the horses exercised, but where we can we time it to avoid the cold snaps.”
It got brutally cold on the plains during the depths of winter and the wind could slice straight through you.
The horses liked to stay cozy in the heated stable most of the time, but the arena didn’t let them get their energy out the way the regular outdoors did.
Every so often we’d send them out, or do a nice long warmup before going on a ride.
“We have snowmobiles, too, but the bison aren’t as fond of those. Mostly we use them to pull the snow drags to flatten and smooth out the trails along the fences so we can take the horses out afterward.”
Nora grumbled, and I caught one word that sounded like ‘code,’ which I assumed was her version of ‘cold.’
“We’ll be back inside soon,” I promised. “We can get a nice fire going, make some apple cider, and let these little toesies thaw out.” I tapped the tip of one of her boots.
“You guys are all so good with them,” Maisie said, her voice wistful. “I was so sure when I left that I wouldn’t feel comfortable unless I had the kids within arm’s reach. You’ve all been so sweet and patient, and I really appreciate everyone taking an interest.”
“Fate or not, we take care of each other out here. We want all of you to feel safe. How else can this feel like home? None of you asked for the life you had.”
“We really didn’t. I wish almost every day that I could go back in time, avoid being caught before I could get out.
I’ve consoled myself about wishing for that by deciding my children would’ve made their way to me eventually, that their souls were meant to be part of my family.
I’ll never stop regretting who their father is. ”
“You didn’t choose him,” I reminded her.
“I know, but sometimes the guilt is heavy regardless.”
She fell silent with the remainder of the ride.
When we got back to the stable, Bryan offered to take the kids inside and watch them while we dealt with the horses.
After getting a quick hit of Maisie’s scent, he scooped up Nora and took Paisley’s hand, Cody following at their side into the main house.
I wasn’t quite prepared for the relief I felt that she had chosen to stay out with us.
Determined to assist, she became our runner, taking the bridles as we removed them to hang them up.
The horses hadn’t gotten sweaty, so after removing their saddles and blankets, we let them go straight into their stalls where Carter topped up their food buckets.
Maisie shivered.
“I recommend a nice warm shower when we get inside.”
She tilted her head. “Would you like to join me for it?”
Did she actually ask me that or did I hallucinate it?
“Could you repeat that? I need to make sure I heard you correctly.”
Maisie’s cheeks were bright pink, her gaze darting behind me to where Carter and Wyatt were giving Lucky and Merri the pony some attention. “You don’t have to…”
“No, I want to.” I stepped closer, watching the bob of her throat as she swallowed hard. “I just need to make sure my brain didn’t fill in what I wanted to hear over what you actually said.”
“It’s probably too forward, I ju—”
“Maisie,” I interrupted softly. “Ask me again.”
“Would you, um, want to join me?” She stared down at her boots. “In the shower.”
“Feels like we’re skipping a lot of steps if we do that,” I said, and before she could retract the offer, I added, “so why don’t we hit some of them right now?”
I boosted her up onto one of the stall gates and leaned to meet her mouth, the first brush of her lips making me moan.
Carter and Wyatt’s eyes were like a tangible caress as they watched the exchange but didn’t make a move to come over.
Maisie curled her fingers into my coat collar, the icy tips warming against my skin as she pulled me closer, spreading her knees for me to slot between them.
Evidently, whatever had shifted between her and Wyatt had left her more open to things changing with me as well, and I fully intended to leap on the opportunity.
She sighed against my lips, consuming me in bits and pieces like I was a sample platter and she was content to try out every angle and speed to find what suited best. Her sweetness was as addicting as Carter had been the first time I’d gotten my hands on him, and her peach blossom scent rose like a fog around us until I was subtly trying to rock against her to relieve some of the pressure.
The movement unlocked something in her and she wrapped her legs around me.
Pulling me even closer, she arched into me, a whimper slipping out.
Maisie really was like her scent, a little blossom slowly opening to experience the sunshine. God, I hoped we could be the sunshine she needed to bloom fully.
“Could I make an odd request?” she asked when she pulled away.
“Go for it.”
“Could we just exist in the shower? I probably should have specified that when I asked.” Maisie dipped her gaze. “I’m not ready for the full scope of what being part of this pack means, but I’m working on it.”
I traced my thumb over her lower lip, lifting her chin so she looked at me again.
“Not a soul on this property expects you to move faster than you’re comfortable.
You don’t even have to move toward anything at all.
Whatever happens has to be because you want it to, not because you think you’re supposed to, or because you think someone would be upset if you didn’t. ”
She locked her hands around my wrist, kissing the pad of my thumb. “I know. I mean, intellectually, I do. Sometimes I have to shove down the compulsion, but I’m trying. I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to. I thought about it the first time you had me on a horse.”
“You did?”
She nodded. Maisie hadn’t given any indication of that, but I guess it made sense.
“Did you think I’d have pushed if you’d said something then?”
“I—not exactly. At the time I didn’t even really consider what you might do. I was mad at myself for wanting you.”
I blinked, thoroughly confused. “Why?”
Her cheeks got even darker, tears gathering on her lower lashes.
“Because I was afraid if I let myself want you that when my heat came, it would only break me. I was used to enduring when I was denied by someone I didn’t want to touch me, but I don’t think I could handle having someone I wanted deny me, too. ”
I stared at her for a long moment, processing the words.
“Maisie, there is no world in which I’d deny you if you wanted me to be part of your heat.
All you have to do is ask, and you wouldn’t be alone for a second of it.
It’s okay if you don’t believe it, I know what you’ve experienced probably makes that impossible, but I’ll say it as often as you need, and at a certain point, the only way I can prove it true is to have the chance to show up.
Whenever that happens, I intend to take care of you. ”
Maisie wrapped her arms around my torso, pressing her face to my chest. “I’m working on believing it. Everything is so different from before.”
“And we’ll keep it that way,” I promised. “Take all the time you need, but we’re right here to build a future with you if you want that.”
“I want it,” she murmured, holding me tighter. “I want it so much.”