Chapter 45
Iparked across the street from the school in my rental car, watching as Natalie dropped off her oldest children for the day. I followed her around the corner and when she was stopped at a red light, I pulled up alongside her, waving.
She looked curiously over, not recognizing me quite yet. I rolled down my window and pulled down my scarf.
Her eyes widened and she rolled down the passenger window. “Holy shit. Maisie?”
“Come to the park.” It was all I got out before the light turned green, but she waited for me to go, following after.
The park we pulled to a stop at was mostly an open field with a few trees and bushes, but it was always a good spot for people to let their dogs run around. Natalie slipped out of her car and came around to sit in my passenger seat.
She hugged me fiercely. “I thought I would never see you again.”
“I’m very glad to say that’s not the case.”
“How are you? Are you okay?”
“I’m good now, amazing actually, but before I get into any of that, do you know what’s going on in the compound?”
“Not a lot of details, but it’s been in a fucking uproar. Steven has talked to his friend group. It sounds like the Deckers are in a state of collapse.”
“What do you mean?”
“I heard Big Daddy had a stroke when he found out about Paul and your dad.”
I stared at her, having no idea how to respond to that news.
My interactions with our leader had been minimal.
I was always shuffled away when he would show up, both when I was still with my parents, and even when I was taken into Paul’s home.
At most I would hand him a drink and then be expected to silently manage the children elsewhere.
“What happened? Did they find you? Everyone has been so tight-lipped about how they died.”
“They found me. I killed Paul and my bondmate killed my father.”
“Bondmate? Paul killed your dad?”
I shook my head. “I found a pack, my scent matches. I had a heat flare and bonded with one of the alphas.”
“Ho-ly shit.” Natalie laughed. “You’ve been a busy little bee. I’m so happy for you! Assuming you’re happy, of course.”
“I love them. They’re so incredible to me and the kids.”
“You lucky duck. It’s about time the universe sent good things your way.”
I twisted my fingers nervously. “Do you think the compound is going to come after me?”
“Girl, I doubt it. The hierarchy is falling apart, and no one who takes over is going to be mad at you for taking Paul and Arlon out of the running. Big Daddy has lost his grip. I don’t think he can even talk anymore, and if he does improve, I don’t know how many people would still follow him.”
“I mean, that last part is hard to say. I’ve been watching a lot of documentaries, trying to pinpoint and deconstruct anything left over from my time there. I learned there are literally cult leaders in prison who still have active followers.”
“Too true,” Natalie said with a sigh. “Some people get lost in the cult sauce and never let go. Still, I can keep an ear out. If I hear anything I’ll let you know. How do I do that?”
I gave her my burner number and she input it into her phone as her local library to cover that it was me.
“Tell me about your pack?”
I suppose there was no harm in it. Compound members already knew the location so a simple search would reveal their identities anyway.
“Do you remember Carter Balor?”
“Your cutie patootie super secret high school sweetheart I swore to never tell a soul about?”
“That’s the one,” I replied with a smile and pulled up the website for the conservation area on my phone. “It’s his pack that took me in. They take care of a huge property with a few hundred bison on conservation land.”
“Damn, girl. That is a beautiful pack. Which one did you bond?”
“He’s not on there. He’s a new addition and only got there a couple of months before I did.” There were still photos of him on the Internet though, so I found one of them and turned the phone back to her.
“He looks dapper as hell in a suit. Has he gone country since he came out here?”
“He’s definitely more at home in jeans now.”
Natalie hugged me again. “You’re making me wish I could pick up and go find my own fantasy pack.”
“Do it.” I would ask what was stopping her, but we both knew the answer. Her children had come about in much the same fashion as mine. For those who didn’t know him well, they might describe her alpha as a good man, but not being as bad as Paul didn’t mean he was good.
“I would need somewhere to go, and Steven would have to let me go. I can’t imagine the odds of that happening are very high.”
“You could come stay with me.”
“I’m not giving them any more reason to bother you again.” She sat back with a sad sigh, leaning her temple on the headrest to look at me. “Have you heard from Theo? They said he left the same time as you.”
“He’s staying with friends, joined a pack and everything.”
Her eyes widened. “He has an omega?”
“Not with the pack. It’s just him and three other alphas.”
I couldn’t mistake the drop of her shoulders as anything else but relief.
I eyed her curiously. “He did say once that he has one, but that he couldn’t have her. I asked for details, and he wouldn’t say anything. Do you know anything?”
“No,” she said quickly. Too quickly. “Theo and I barely talked.”
I looked at her shrewdly, but I would let it slide for now. Instead, I switched to a new topic. “Do you know anything about my mother? Or if anything has moved ahead with Marlow?”
“I heard your mom was in the hospital for a little bit after you left. I used to see her in town sometimes when she picked up the little ones, but I haven’t since then.
I don’t know anything about Marlow. Amelia sees her at school sometimes, and said she’s looked sadder since you left, but not much beyond that. ”
Her phone rang, startling us both. She rolled her eyes when she looked at the screen. “It’s Steven. One second.”
Natalie stepped outside before answering, talked for a minute, then popped back in. “He saw me parked on the tracking app and wanted to know what was going on. Told him I had a charley horse and was walking it off. I should go, but it was so great to see you. Do you think we’ll get to talk again?”
“I hope so. I don’t know how often I can come into town, but I’ll stick to the drop-off time when I do so you’ll know when to expect me.”
Natalie leaned across the seat, giving me a final hug. “Take good care of yourself. I love you, and I miss you. Give your kids a hug from me, okay?”
“I love you, too. Hug your kids for me, too. Stay safe.”
She blew me a kiss and got back into her own car, driving off. I waited a few minutes more to collect myself, then returned the car to where Carter had rented it. He and Colt were waiting there for me when I got back.
“How did it go?” Colt asked when I climbed into the backseat.
“Moderately successful. I think the most important thing is that she doesn’t think we need to worry about them coming after us.”
“Thank god.” Colt breathed a sigh of relief.
We called Bryan and Wyatt, putting them on speakerphone while I updated everyone during the drive home on what Natalie had told me.
“I also wanted to talk to all of you about something when I get back.”
“Can’t talk to us about it now?” Carter asked.
I shook my head. “I want it to be in person, tonight after the kids go to bed.”
I mused on everything Natalie said for the rest of the drive.
I wanted her to walk out of there and find her own happy ending.
She wouldn’t find what she needed under Steven’s thumb.
Before finding my pack I wouldn’t have believed it was possible, but now I knew she could have it too if fate chose to be kind.
The day breezed away until I was curled up in my nest with my pack.
“So, I’ve been thinking,” I said into the quiet.
“About?” Wyatt kissed my bare shoulder, not shy in the least as he inhaled my scent while he was so close.
“When…everything happened, I thought I might lose all of you.” Speaking it out loud had the words catching in my throat. “I already knew I wanted to keep everyone, and you’ve all been so patient with my recovery, and I…”
Carter popped his head up when I trailed off. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” I gave myself a second to breathe. “I think I’m ready to have a heat with the pack.”
Bryan’s concern and delight crashed together in the bond.
Wyatt lifted on his elbow to look down at me. “You’re sure?”
I threaded my fingers through his hair, drawing him down for a gentle kiss. “I want to be your omega in every way I can be. I want the pack to bond me.”
His next kiss was far from gentle, pouring his affection over me until my whole body was buzzing.
I didn’t get a second to recover when he pulled away, Colt claiming my mouth just as fervently.
Carter wiggled his way in, slinking up my body to stake his own claim as soon as Colt gave him the opportunity.
Bryan gave me space, but I felt the sparkling tingles of his desire as he watched.
He wasn’t off the hook, though, Carter looking at him as he sat up and rolled over Colt to lie against him. “What about you, Bryan?”
“Me?” He blinked rapidly, adorable panic pumping through the bond. Perhaps panic wasn’t quite correct. Exhilaration, confusion, and hopeful anticipation were probably more accurate.
“I know you’ll be part of things when Maisie bonds into the pack, but do you want to bond me?”
The bond churned with desperate longing. I reached for him in it, trying to nudge him toward courage so he could speak his truth.
Bryan swallowed hard. “I would like that very much.”
His relief when Carter kissed him swept me away and I let myself melt into Colt’s and Wyatt’s arms.
“I can go off suppressants,” I said when we had all settled back down, “but I don’t want to get pregnant.”
“Ever again?” Carter asked. “Or not this time?”
Nerves twisted through me. I had no idea how they would react to my answer, if it was a deal-breaker, or how the future might turn out, but they deserved to know.
“Ever again. I mean, I know the experience with all of you would be different and so much of it would be better, but I love where we’re at now.
I never had a choice before, and…I need to have the choice.
Maybe in a few years I’ll change my mind—”
“You don’t have to,” Wyatt insisted. “That’s not something we’ll ever push on you. If the only children in our lives are the ones across the hall, then I’m more than content with that. I love them.”
“Me, too,” Colt added.
“Me, three.” Carter reached over him to lace his fingers with mine.
“Me, uh, me, four.” Bryan joined hands with us, his admiration flowing over me. “I also want to tell you how proud I am of you for telling us that. I know how hard it was for you.”
“Thank you.” My cheeks burned and I fought the compulsion to close my eyes and bury myself in the blankets.
“Maisie.” Colt brushed his fingertips over my cheek.
“We love you. That remains the same with or without more children. If you never want to have more, then we’ll keep loving the family you brought us, and if you want to have another some day, then we’ll love that child, too.
But we’re a family; today, tomorrow, and always. ”