Chapter Seventeen
Remington
I wake up from my nap feeling refreshed. I guess I just needed a little break after five days of stress.
Not that I haven’t enjoyed myself, but I’ve been operating outside of my comfort zone for days. I needed a battery recharge so I’d be ready to do the first rose ceremony.
This is certainly going to be fun. I feel like this show could be subtitled with ways to unnerve the introvert.
Standing in front of the cameras and all nineteen suitors, plus the staff that’ll be there—while wearing another damn tuxedo? It sounds terrible, if I’m honest with myself.
But I understand needing the drama of the ceremony for the show. It’s honestly brilliant, and I’ve loved every minute of watching the ceremonies on television. The problem is this won’t be watching it on a screen as an observer. Nope, just me and nineteen suitors awaiting their fate.
Anxiety has been gnawing at my stomach since I woke up and keeping me from enjoying a full dinner. I had plenty of time and could have joined the suitors for dinner, but I couldn’t bring myself to leave my suite. I already know which rose I’ll be choosing for each of the suitors, but part of me is afraid I’ll tell them before the actual ceremony.
Now, I’m sitting in the sitting area and chewing on my thumbnail as I wait for Tessa and Bree to come get me. I’m not allowed to go to the ballroom on my own because there’s a chance I’ll run into one of the suitors, and we have to remain separated until after the ceremony.
Another thing I loved about the show but am finding I don’t like as much in person. Such is the way of life—am I right?
I jump to my feet when the knock sounds, hurrying over and throwing the door open. “It’s time?”
“Yes, Remy, it’s time.” It’s clear Bree’s fighting back laughter, and a glance at Tessa reveals she is as well.
Whatever, let them be amused by me. At least I know they don’t think my anxiety is a joke. It’s just my reactions that they find funny. I can accept that.
“Well, let’s do this thing, then,” I demand, stepping out of my suite and allowing the door to shut behind me. “Is it bad that I’m nervous?”
Bree shakes her head. “Of course not. It’s normal to be nervous. This is your first rose ceremony, and we know you’re a little more anxious than the average person. I think I’d be more worried if you weren’t nervous.”
I nod. “That’s a good point. Don’t worry. I’m so nervous, I’m sweating like a stuck pig. It’s all good.”
“Good to know.” Tessa attempts to hide her snickering behind her hand, but she’s not fooling me.
“There’s this season’s omega.” Finn’s loud, accented voice brings a smile to my face.
“What are you doing here, Finn? You don’t usually attend the ceremonies, do you?”
He shakes his head. “Nope. I’ve been through enough of them to know I don’t want to go through anymore. We just thought it would be better for me to be on hand since this can be an especially stressful time. If you don’t need me, then great, but it’s better I’m here if you do.”
“Thank you—all of you.” I glance around the group as Reginald joins us. “You’ve been very accommodating with me and my anxiety when you didn’t need to be. It means a lot to me and shows just how much you care about the people you bring on the show.”
“Well, shit.” Bree sniffles, swiping her hands across her cheeks, but her tears keep falling. “I didn’t know you were going to make me cry. Now, I’m going to have to have Allison fix my makeup.”
Tessa snorts. “How about you stop crying before you worry about calling Allison over?”
“I can’t,” Bree wails, and I take a step back, unsure what’s causing her to react this way.
“Holy shit. You’re pregnant again, aren’t you?” Finn exclaims, pointing a finger at Tessa. “You owe me twenty dollars, Tessa. I was right!”
Tessa’s head drops. “Of course she is. Damn it, Bree. Couldn’t you keep their dicks out of you long enough for me to win the bet?”
“You bet on me?” Bree’s tears slowly dry up as she glances between the two of them. “What was the bet?”
Tessa glares at Finn. “Finn said you’d be knocked up again this season, and I said you’d at least wait until your next heat to get pregnant.”
Reginald pulls Bree into a hug. “Ignore the asshole alphas. Congratulations, omega. You’re single-handedly trying to repopulate the world.”
“Asshole.” Bree shoves him again, batting at his hands as he laughs. “This is only our third.”
“And most people struggle to have one,” I butt in with a smile.
The look Bree shoots Tessa is full of regret, but she waves off her friend. “Don’t give me that look. I might not be able to have kids, but the rest of my pack can. Natalie is already pregnant, and at the rate we’re going, the others will be knocked up by the end of the year. They might not come out of my vagina, but that doesn’t make them any less mine.”
Reginald shakes his head, a look of disgust on his face. “I do not want to hear about your vagina ever again. I’m glad everyone’s packs are having babies, but how about we focus on this season’s omega, yeah?”
“I mean, I was happy to let them keep going,” I admit with a small smile. “They’re a great distraction from worrying about making a fool of myself in front of the suitors.”
“You’re going to be fine, omega. Don’t forget, the best part of these ceremonies is we can start over if we need to. It’s not like the candid camera footage that’s used from the mansion’s cameras.” Reginald offers me a smile. “Now, how about we head in there and get this show on the road?”
I nod, my head continuing to bob as he offers me his arm. I just can’t seem to make my body stop its movements so I just go with it as Bree opens the door and Reginald leads me inside.
My eyes dart around the room, taking it in to see if they’ve made any changes since Evangeline’s season, but seeing none. The dark stage is still set up in the center of the room, with the suitors lined up in front of it. Fairy lights and LED candles spread throughout the room, adding to the ambiance as moonlight filters in from the open curtains.
I’m probably holding onto Reginald more firmly than necessary, but I take comfort in his heat, and he doesn’t seem to mind. He leads me up the stairs and onto the stage, and I jump when the lights come up. I snicker and shake my head at my ridiculousness.
As he leads us to the center of the stage, my eyes zero in on the table filled with vases of various colored roses. With just a few steps, we’ve reached our destination, and it really is showtime.
“Welcome back to Heated , viewers and suitors. We’ve assembled in the ballroom for this season’s first rose ceremony. Remington has met his twenty suitors, although Lorenzo had to leave because of a medical emergency, leaving him with just nineteen suitors to choose from. He’s also been on a group date with each of them, four at a time. Now, it’s time for him to decide what comes next for each of them. Remy has asked that I explain the significance of each rose before we begin.”
My eyes roam over the suitors as Reginald gestures to the roses. Once more, the men are dressed in tuxedos and the women in formal gowns. Everyone looks amazing, and I wish I was in the crowd with them instead of on the stage. Anything to not be the center of attention.
“There are six different colors of roses for Remington to choose from, and each has its own meaning. The black rose is given when the omega decides it’s time for them to head home. The red rose means you’ve been chosen for the omega’s pack. What happens from there is up to Remington. He’ll make the choice of whether he wants to bond immediately or if he wants to wait until he’s chosen his complete pack.
“The white rose is an invitation to join the omega in their room for the night. We can all guess what that might infer, but it could also just mean they want to cuddle. You can never tell with an omega.” Reginald laughs as he glances over his shoulder at me. “The peach roses are an invitation for a one-on-one date with the omega, and the lavender is an invitation for a group date. If you receive the lavender rose, you will not find out who will be going on the date with you until Remy is ready to make that announcement.”
He plucks a yellow rose and spins it between his fingers. “The yellow rose is one of the most common ones given—or at least it has been during past seasons. It means the omega wishes for you to remain on the show but isn’t inviting you on a date this week. The rose ceremonies happen each week on Saturday nights unless the omega asks for one sooner. The black, red, and yellow roses will only be handed out during the ceremony. The white, lavender, and peach can be handed out at any time during the week. Now that you know the basics, let’s get Remington up here, shall we?”
I’d rather we didn’t, but that doesn’t stop me from stepping forward with a smile. “Good evening, everyone. I’m so happy to see everyone’s faces here in one place. As Reginald explained, there are many ways these roses can be handed out. Because I deal with a lot of anxiety, I tend to be a planner. That means I’ll be handing out the roses for dates tonight. I already have a ton of date ideas, but this week, I think I’m going to allow my suitors to choose the dates.
“Because that will require some planning on your part, I’ll let you know tomorrow when our dates will be and who will be joining which group. Speaking of tomorrow, Sundays will be spent as a group. It’ll allow time for all of us to bond together. After all, I’m working on building a pack, and everyone will need to get along. There’s no way I’m going to put up with pack mates who can’t stand one another.”
“Thank you, Remington.” Reginald smiles as I reach out and grab the first rose and hide it behind my back. “I’d like to welcome alpha Daniel Kennedy to join us on the stage.”
My eyes find Daniel at the edge of the crowd, nodding as he straightens his suit before coming to join us.
“Hi, Daniel.”
He smiles. “Hi, Remy.”
“Look, I’m a little awkward at the best of times, but when I get stuck on a stage in front of a room full of people, it just gets worse. Rather than drag this out, I’d rather get it over with.” I pull out the peach rose and offer it to him. “I feel like the two of us didn’t get enough time together during the group date, so I’d like you to join me for a one-on-one date.”
“I’d love to.” He takes the rose before hugging me. “Thank you, Remy. I look forward to our date.”
He doesn’t wait for me to reciprocate, already hurrying off the stage as if he’s afraid I’m going to change my mind. I’m not, but I can understand the sentiment. I quickly grab the next roses and conceal them behind my back as Reginald announces the next group.
“Next, I’d like to welcome Pack Hawthorne to the stage.” He gives their names and designations as they join me on the stage.
“I really enjoyed getting to know all three of you during our group date. The three of you and Daniel made the first day a breeze. It’s probably the most comfortable I’ve felt around anyone after just a few hours since I became an adult.” I pull the lavender roses out and offer them to each of them. “Which is why I’d like you to join me on another group date this week.”
“Hell yes! I knew you liked us.” Milo jumps forward to grab his rose, kissing my cheek before returning to Victoria’s side. Both alphas take their roses with smiles before they leave the stage.
It’s a bit of a slow process, working our way through suitor after suitor, but I can see the reasoning behind doing it this way—even if I’m not a huge fan of it myself.
I pass out yellow roses to Brooke, Lee, Quinn, Camila, Aubrey, Nolan, and Ian. As much as I’d love to take everyone out on a date, I can’t get to know everyone all at once. The only other peach rose I give out is to Santiago. I need to spend some time with just him so I can get a better idea of the kind of man and alpha he is. I won’t hold the first night against him, but that doesn’t mean I won’t be cautious about him remaining on the show.
It was never my intention to send anyone home during this rose ceremony, so I don’t hand out any black roses. It’s also entirely too early to hand out any red or white roses, which leaves lavender roses for the twins, Rhys, Gracie, Pack Woods, and Taylor. I already have a plan on who I want to join me for each group date, so I can see how some of them interact with the others.
Besides Taylor, Pack Woods, and Ian, they’ve all had days to get to know one another. There’s no way they haven’t already started drifting toward others. It’s up to me to see if I like the direction they’re drifting or if it doesn’t work for me.
As the last of the suitors leaves the stage, Reginald steps forward once more. “And that concludes our first rose ceremony of season four. Remington hasn’t chosen to send anyone home during the ceremony—something completely unprecedented. On the first three seasons, each omega chose to send home at least one suitor during the first rose ceremony. While Lorenzo is unable to continue the season with us, he wasn’t sent home by Remington.
“This omega is going to shake things up, isn’t he? I can already tell. Are you surprised by these events? Are you glad all nineteen suitors still remain and have a chance at winning a spot in Remington’s pack? Let us know what you’re thinking on social media or on the forums. That’s it for us tonight on Heated . I’m Reginald Williams, and I hope you’ll join us next week as Remington and his suitors progress.”
I stand there, smiling like an idiot, until we’re given the signal that has Reginald relaxing as he turns to face me. “Are you still holding up, okay?”
“Yeah, it wasn’t as bad as I made it out in my head. I’m not sure I’ll ever enjoy it, but I think it’ll be easier next week.”
“Well, you did wonderfully. You didn’t fumble a word or drop a single rose.” He snickers when I wrinkle my nose. “Come on, Remy. I’m just trying to make you feel better.”
I scoff. “You’re not doing a very good job.”
“Sure I am. Bree and Tessa are waiting. They’ll want to talk to you for a minute before they free you for the night.”
I follow him off the stage, finding both women waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs with Finn beside them. My suitors linger a little, probably wanting to talk with me, but Tessa shoos them along until it’s just the five of us remaining.
“What’s up? I feel like I’m in trouble with my parents.”
Don’t freak out, Remy. They just want to talk.
Don’t freak out.
Yeah, telling myself not to freak out? It never works, and yet, I keep trying.
“Breathe, Remy.” Finn’s hand comes down on my shoulder as he shakes his head. “You act like we’re going to behead you or something. Heated isn’t that kind of show, I promise.”
I’m so surprised by his words, I burst out laughing. Maybe this is the real reason they keep Finn around. I’m sure his degree is helpful, but maybe it’s just because he’s funny as hell. I can’t think of a single time he hasn’t made me feel completely at ease. I can’t say that about everyone.
Bree gives him a funny look before focusing her attention back on me. “We just wanted to touch base with you again and make sure you get a time set up to meet with Finn. We don’t usually require our omegas to meet with him, but in your case, I think we’re going to have to.”
“We’re just talking about one day a week for now,” Tessa adds without giving me time to respond. “We just don’t want you to get overwhelmed while you’re trying to choose your pack.”
“I know,” I start, but Finn cuts me off.
“We already have our session set up for tomorrow, but please don’t argue with them. It was my idea for you to see me regularly, and it doesn’t have to be forever. We just need to get your anxiety dialed in. You’re dealing with so many changes all at once, and that can be hell on someone with chronic anxiety. Once we have it a little better under control, we might be able to lengthen the time between required visits.” He shakes his head. “I really hate requiring people to come see me, but there are times it’s what I have to do.”
Rolling my eyes, I pat his hand. “If you would’ve let me continue, I was going to say I know you’re just looking out for me, and I appreciate it. Once a week doesn’t seem like too much at all. I rarely have to deal with many changes in my line of work. Or at least not ones I don’t instigate. I’d love to find out ways of coping with it.”
The three of them share an abashed look while Reginald laughs.
“Okay, lad. You’re right. I should’ve allowed you to speak. For our appointment, is eight too early for you?”
“No, that’s perfect. Will I need to stop in the kitchen for breakfast?”
“Nay. Just come straight to my office, and I’ll order for us. That way, we can talk for a bit while they cook it up. How does that sound?”
I nod. “It sounds perfect. Thanks again, Finn.”
Tessa clears her throat as she shoves Reginald. “We’re glad to hear that, Remy. Now, for tonight, you have a choice. You can choose to spend time with your suitors, or you can return to your suite. I’m only mentioning this because if you choose to return to your suite, we’ll let the suitors know.”
I consider it for a moment. I had a nap so I’m not feeling especially tired, but my social battery isn’t fully charged either. The idea of returning to my suite sounds amazing, but I feel guilty about leaving my suitors to fend for themselves after I haven’t seen many of them for days.
It’s not like I won’t be spending all day with them tomorrow. They’ve survived without me for this long. I’m sure a few more hours won’t kill them.
“I think I’d like to return to my suite,” I finally decide. “It’ll give me one last night to relax on my own before I deal with all nineteen of them at once.”
Saying that out loud makes me even happier about my decision. I’ve only been around four of them at a time, and now they’re all going to want time with me.
And there goes my anxiety.
Thank the gods for my appointment with Finn in the morning. At least I know we’ll have something to talk about.