6. Lyra
There wasn’t time to think before Eli yanked me away from the door, and in a maneuver I couldn’t explain for the life of me, I was tucked safely behind his body.
“What the fuck?” Eli barked out, making me flinch at the commanding Alpha energy behind the words. “Why the hell are you here and in Lyra’s apartment, Crew? I know she didn’t give you permission to enter her home, so your explanation better be damn good.”
Peeking out from behind Eli, I took in the man who was getting his ass handed to him. It was obvious they knew each other, and something about this guy, Crew, seemed familiar. The man had style, but it was a casual feel. He wore jeans, a black T-shirt, and a red and black checkered flannel shirt. I could see tattoos on his hands, meaning he probably had more, gauged ears, a neatly trimmed beard, and hair that was buzzed on the sides but longer on the top and slicked back. If I were back in Rockton, I would have assumed he was one of Elora’s friends. Most people around her were in the music scene one way or another, and he would fit in perfectly.
“Big bro, you need to take it down a couple of notches, okay?” Crew said, sliding his hands into the jeans pockets. “As for why I’m here, you can blame our mother. She heard something happened to your assistant and ordered me to bring over some things. I hadn’t planned on being here when she got back, but you got out of there faster than I expected.”
Eli grunted at his brother’s explanation but didn’t budge. Knowing this was Eli’s brother, I wasn’t as freaked out. Don’t get me wrong, it was still a little creepy he’d been in my home, but at least he wasn’t a stalker or burglar. I stepped out from behind Eli and gained his brother’s attention instantly.
A wide smile grew on Crew’s face as he reached out. “Hi, I’m Crew, Eli’s younger brother.” We shook hands, and a glint of mischief appeared in his light green eyes. “Sorry if I freaked you out, and I’m even more sorry if I inadvertently became a cockblocking dick.”
“Crew,” Eli snapped, taking a step forward.
The unabashed brother threw up his hand. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, but come on, how many times do I ever get to tease you about making out with a woman in the hallway? Actually, I have to say I’m pretty proud of you. I know how difficult it is for you to let go and have some fun.”
“I will give you five seconds to leave before I drag you out by your ear,” Eli threatened.
Crew let out a sigh, shrugged, and clapped his hands together. “Well, folks, that’s my cue to leave, but before I do…” Crew paused and pulled something out of his back pocket, and offered it to me. “Mom wanted me to give this to you… it’s her personal cell phone number. She told me to tell you if you ever need a listening ear, she’s happy to be there for you.”
Taking the business card, I saw her number scrawled on the back. Checking the other side, I found it was for a company called Vibestation Recording Studio. Then I noticed it listed Crew as the owner just above where his phone number was printed.
“Now you’ve got my number, too, if you ever can’t get a hold of Eli,” Crew explained. “Mom might have mentioned you moved here by yourself, so I figured you might need a friend you could bitch to about Eli. Trust me, I’ve got lots of good stories to tell if you ever need to get even with your boss.”
“Why would she need to get even with me?” Eli asked, crossing his arms. “I’m an incredibly fair and reasonable boss.”
Crew nodded. “Sure you are, big bro, but everyone needs to bitch about their boss at some point or another. I don’t make the rules… it’s just how it is out in the working world. Lyra, it was lovely to meet you, and I hope you’re feeling better.” With that, Crew gave us both a wave and headed down the hall to the elevators.
Once he was out of sight, I felt the bubble of laughter building until I couldn’t hold it back. I covered my mouth, trying not to be too loud, and hurried into my apartment. Eli followed me in, shutting the door behind him as I flopped onto my new overstuffed sage-green couch. I continued to laugh until I started to cry, my cheeks were sore, and my stomach hurt from how hard I’d been laughing.
“Oh my God,” I gasped between lingering chuckles as I wiped my face with the sleeve of my sweatshirt. “What a way to meet someone.”
Eli had chosen to sit across from me on the matching oversized ottoman. “Please allow me to apologize for my brother. He always has the best intentions in his actions.”
I turned to look at Eli sitting there with his perfect posture and impeccable manners, which clashed with his current appearance. It made me wonder if he could ever relax or always felt like he needed to be what people expected of him. Rolling onto my side, I grabbed a soft cream-colored velvet pillow and tucked it under my head.
“It’s fine, no harm done,” I assured him. “Would it surprise you to know that wasn’t the most awkward introduction I’d ever experienced?”
Eli’s brows rose. “I can’t imagine anything much worse.”
“Oh, there is,” I argued. “Try having the mother of the man whose face is between your legs walk in on you.”
The look of horror on Eli’s face was priceless, but I got the feeling he wasn’t as reserved as he’d like people to think.
Sitting up, I clutched the pillow, trying to fight against the urge to wrap myself around Eli. It was like now that I’d gotten a taste of him, I needed more, but if I gave in, it would only make it hard when he went home.
“So, was your brother right about you not giving him many things to tease you about?” I asked.
Eli dropped his gaze and cleared his throat. “Crew is a Beta, and while I know our society doesn’t give them the respect and support they deserve, it gives him far more freedom. Of course, he would never see it that way, but one thing Alphas never talk about is the weight of expectation. Betas are free to build their lives how they want, free of judgment. However, an Alpha is expected to be a top-notch student and obtain a career that befits the leadership abilities we are naturally born with. I know my sense of duty is higher than most, making me seem cold and demanding of others.”
“I don’t think you’re cold at all,” I interjected, my hand reaching out to cover his where it was resting on his knee. “Since I met you, Eli, you’ve done nothing but bend over backward to help me, even after I told you I didn’t want a scent match.”
Eli flipped his hand over so he could hold mine in his. “My sister always tells me that I’m an iceberg. Only a little of who I am shows on the surface. All the best parts are hidden just under the surface, and you have to be willing to make the dive to see them, but it will be worth it in the end.”
“Your sister sounds like a smart person,” I said, squeezing his hand. “After everything I’ve heard about her, I hope we get to meet. She sounds pretty amazing.”
The softest smile appeared on Eli’s lips, and his demeanor relaxed slightly. “Bailey-Rose is extraordinary, and I would love for you to meet her. I know this might sound odd, but in many ways, I feel slightly more like her father than a brother. Mother always put me, as the oldest, in charge of looking out for her, making sure she didn’t push herself too hard and others didn’t get too rough when they played. I’m sure it’s because of that, Crew thinks I can’t have fun. He was the one I normally had to scold for taking it too far.”
“I believe I heard she bonded to a pack?” I asked, wanting to be sure, and he nodded. “Do you like them?”
“They adore her, and she loves them unconditionally, and that’s what matters to me,” Eli answered. “It’s hard to trust anyone to take care of someone you love, which is why I feel more like a father than a brother. Crew goes over to their house all the time or hangs out with Bailey-Rose at her art studio. Then again, they have been best friends since the beginning.”
Having never had a sibling, I wasn’t sure what the typical dynamic was between siblings, but to me, this sounded like the three of them had a special family bond. “Why don’t you go with him to visit?”
“I have,” Eli assured me. “Unfortunately, we are going through a growth period with the company, which has me working longer.”
If there were two emotions I could read on anyone’s face, they were sadness and loneliness. I’d seen it for years in my expression when I looked in the mirror. Eli was good at hiding it but not good enough to fool me. Choosing not to fight my impulse to comfort him, I crawled across so I could wrap my arms around Eli’s neck as I sat in his lap. Without hesitation, he returned the hug and just held me with his head resting on my shoulder. My fingers absently started to run through the short hair on the back of his head, knowing I enjoyed the comforting feel it gave me.
“It’s okay to admit it’s hard to be around other’s happiness when you’re lonely,” I whispered. “Trust me, I’ve been there, and you’re allowed to feel that way.”
Eli hugged me tighter for a moment then pulled me away from his chest so he could look me in the face. “I do feel that way, but I’m not sure I would have known that without meeting you. If anyone had asked me, I would have told them I had nothing to feel sad or lonely about as long as I had my family around. Yet here I am holding you and praying you’ll change your mind about sending me home so I don’t have to leave you.”
His words had my breath catching in my throat. Everything I’d feared about meeting my scent match was starting to come true. For years, I tried to tell myself it didn’t matter, and a scent match wasn’t that important. It was simple biology, nothing more. However, I knew that was a lie. I’ve known it since the first time I said it, but that belief kept me alive until now.
The feel of his hands as they slid up the sides of my neck and slipped into my hair had me turning boneless. I’d let this man do whatever he wanted because, in my soul, I trusted him to take care of me. Letting out a soft sigh, my eyes fluttered closed as I enjoyed him being close, holding me, and letting his scent sink into my skin so it would linger. His lips brushed mine in a questioning manner, testing to see if I was willing. When he didn’t immediately deepen the kiss, I whimpered, and Eli wasted no time giving me what I wanted.
Unlike the frenzied kiss in the hall, he took his time, acting as if he had nowhere to be but this moment. One hand shifted to cup my cheek tenderly while the other gripped a handful of hair at the base of my neck. If Eli wanted control, I’d gladly give it to him. He was my Alpha, a man created to protect and love me like no one else could. I never experienced such a sense of rightness that this was where I belonged. All these years, I’d tried to run and hide from this achingly beautiful connection that would destroy me as easily as it completed me.
I clung to Eli as I got a glimpse into the love my mom had from not one but three Alphas. As a child, I remembered how my fathers doted on Mom and how she drank it up like a flower being watered. So much love had filled our home, and I never once questioned if it would last. Why would I? Every fairy tale I’d heard promised that true love would win, and no matter what my parents faced, they’d come out the other side even stronger. Unfortunately, the harsh reality that fairy tales are fiction and love can kill just as easily as it can heal was the ending note of my childhood.
With an aching sob, I broke from our kiss and turned my head, hoping he wouldn’t see my tears. This man had seen more than enough of me crying, and I didn’t want him to think this was a regular occurrence.
“I’m sorry, this is just a lot for me,” I explained, quickly brushing away a tear. “No doubt getting some sleep will fix me right up.” Fingers gripped my chin and forced me to look at him, but I kept my eyes closed, knowing he’d see the truth.
“Lyra, what did I say about lying to me?” Eli demanded, his tone firm yet still gentle.
My gaze snapped to his, irritated that he assumed I wasn’t being honest. “It’s not a lie.”
“But it’s not the truth,” he countered.
Emotionally raw with all that had happened in the past twenty-four hours, I shoved off his lap, needing some distance. “Look, I get we are in this strange gray area where you’re technically my boss on top of being an Alpha I’m scent-matched to. However, neither of these things entitles you to demand trust that hasn’t been earned. You want truth? Then here you go… I’d like you to please leave now.”
“Wait—”
“Eli, this is still my home, and I’m allowed to ask anyone I like to leave it,” I cut in, trying to steel myself for how hard it would be to watch him walk out. “I need time. Please just give me until Monday.”
His jaw muscles flexed as he fought to hold whatever he wanted to say in. Finally, he stood, nodded, and headed for the door before pausing. “I will pick you up Monday morning, seven o’clock sharp.”
“There is no?—”
“Lyra, if you want me to walk out this door and give you the space you’re requesting, then you need to give me this. The only way I can keep myself from showing up here before then is knowing I will be able to see you first thing Monday,” Eli explained. “I’m trying to honor what you’re asking of me the best way I can.”
Running my hand through my hair, I accepted his terms. “I’ll see you at seven then.”
Eli pulled his phone out of his pocket and typed something. A second later, my phone buzzed on the counter where he had placed it after Crew left. “Now you have my number. If you need anything, and I mean anything at all, let me know.”
“Thank you…” I said, pausing because I wasn’t exactly sure which out of the ten things he’d done for me I was thanking him for. “Thank you for everything.”
“You’re welcome, Lyra. Now get some rest, and I’ll see you Monday,” Eli instructed, then walked out into the hall, closing the door softly behind him.
Instantly, my hands began to shake as my heart started to beat wildly. The sound of it was so loud in my ears that it was almost like it had become one of those giant bass drums you see in orchestras. I thought about running after Eli for a second, but I couldn’t. I had to do this. There was no way I could make any sound decisions with him around—it was like my brain had turned into mush.
I snatched up my phone and headed right for my bed, where I would be safe to curl up and hide until this feeling passed. Entering my private space, I felt a little better seeing the things that had always comforted me. My taste was what I liked to call cozy elegance. The colors I was drawn to were muted tones like sage, dusty rose, light blue-gray, and creamy whites. Everything needed to be soft, luxe, and have a simple air of elegance. When life became too much, I needed a place that would offer peace and solitude, and that’s what my bedroom was. No matter where I landed in life, the one thing I could count on was having a bedroom.
Lifting the covers, I crawled in, letting the weighted, chunky knit blanket ground me to the here and now. As was typical for Omegas, my bed was filled with a sea of soft, squishy pillows I nestled into. My gaze landed on a small stuffed lamb sitting on a pillow where I always knew I could find her. The poor thing looked like hell—matted wool and sweet brown eyes made from glass covered in scuffs and scratches. Reaching out, I booped Lammy on the nose that had once been covered in soft leather.
“Promise to watch over me while I take a nap?” I asked my oldest and most loyal companion.
Lammy had been given to me the day I was born, and she’d never left my side. Daddy used to tell me he picked it because I was his precious little lamb, and he wanted to make sure I always knew that. More tears burned my eyes as I thought of my fathers and wondered if they’d be proud of the person I’d become. They’d been so fearless and jumped at the chance to take whatever life threw at them with both hands. It reminded me that I hadn’t always been as fearful and anxious as I was now and glad they weren’t alive to see me like this. Yet I could hear them telling me it was all right. I was still fighting to regain what I’d lost and not giving up.
Closing my eyes, I felt two tears escape and roll down my cheeks, but it was safe to cry here with Lammy as my only witness. The rest of the world could never know how broken I truly was because if they did, I’d to face life forever alone.