Chapter 48
Chapter
Forty-Eight
SIMONA
T hank god for Rye. He perfectly articulates the moment I disappeared from his view—describing it as being bombarded by hundreds of conflicting, see-sawing thoughts and emotions, all pushing and pulling him in all directions. I understand completely because I felt the same overwhelming surge of emotions.
Huge emotions too, like fear, isolation and distrust, came from nowhere and came so close to swallowing me whole. But the instant I saw Hendrix, and then Ryder, the power of the vortex stopped.
“The bond is our living and breathing connection. Constantly full of sharp reminders of where our priority and loyalty should be—each other. Everything that doesn’t serve us becomes an obstacle,” he muses, his lips barely lifting off my palm. “Learning to trust what you can’t see is the challenge. We’ll get better because we have each other. And now, after hearing how you felt—and Dom and Hen too—I already feel better equipped, knowing we all experienced the same thing. ”
Hendrix’s version of how he felt when I was in the office was similar. Although it was more abrupt in a black and white sense. He went from being okay to nearly going on a raging rampage. His Alpha brain was viewing anything outside of our pack as a threat. Dominic’s explanation was clipped short, full of emotion. He had no shame in saying he struggled. Understandably, not only couldn’t he see, hear or scent me, he also couldn’t with Hen or Ryder either.
Talking about the changes we each experience as our bond and packing settles is like getting a full body massage. It hurts in parts, but the relief as we keep sharing and adding more detail is enormous. I was starting to think perhaps I was broken, and what I was feeling was because of my past.
Our very private sharing gets interrupted by another of Wren’s texts.
Her messages are lighting up my phone every fifteen minutes now. Each message carries entitlement, an expectation I provide her an update on where I am, yet she herself refuses to give me anything at all on Lawson. Considering the only reason I’m heading back is to see Lawson, I leave her messages unread. I’m not getting dragged into her world.
The closer we get to where I grew up—I refuse to call it home; it hasn’t been that for a long time—the more I come to accept that this journey is also a goodbye. Only to Lawson. The little girl who was blindly besotted with her father needs to see him one more time, for her sake. My home and my future is in this SUV and back with the girls.
“I need to figure out how I tell the girls,” I say, deliberately steering our conversation in that direction. It’s a tactic, giving me something good to focus on so I don’t get lost by the telltale signs of how close we are to the hospital.
Hendrix clears his throat and catches my eye in the rear vision mirror. The trouble I read in them is easy. “We could host a night at Noire? ”
And I get he’s joking, except I shut down his suggestion in an instant, brutal glare. Well, it’s a hard glare for me. The twinkle in his eye suggests otherwise. “No, Hendrix. The girls are not going to have a night at your sex club,” I hiss, watching him carefully. “Not before I do anyway.”
His eyes ignite, glowing iridescent green. Somehow making him even more attractive.
Ryder starts kissing my palm. “You know he will make you pay if you push him like that.”
I shrug, leaning against him. “Can’t say that worries me at all, Rye. I mean, he winds me up every time he looks at me, so it’s only fair. Besides, I have a membership, so why not use it?”
The growl from Hendrix, amplifies when Dominic adds his own noises to it. They work so well together. Without him even turning around, I know Dominic is on board with the concept. He cranes his neck to one side to release the sudden build-up of tension. And his scent shifts. Right this second, he scents like an erotic book—its pages filled with long, detailed descriptions of what he wants to do, written with desire alone.
Dominic’s scent thickens, and it is like a siren song. My other Alphas perfume only reinforces his desire. Three Alphas doing it at the same time feels like summer misting rain over my skin. Licking my lips, I’m thrilled I can taste it too. Shivers race down my back. I feel oversensitive and hyper aware of them.
It’s the fitting way for us to arrive. Hendrix double parks near the front doors. We are not here to play nice.
We walk as one, because these Alphas are as much a part of me as I am a part of them. I need their strength, and they need my comfort. Our bond ripples with apprehension, along with the unrestrained reminders of their strength and power .
I barely move my lips as they hear me speak under my breath. “Please, no violence. No matter what happens.”
“We know, sweetheart. We are only here for you. They will however understand the ramifications if they so much as let one of their hairs touch you.”
“That works, Hen.”
“We will respect your decision, Sin,” Ryder adds, “But if anyone hurts you…”
I stop walking, turning to face them, keeping my voice low so it’s just for their ears. “I need us to be united in our approach and not driven by fear. If I am not safe, or they attack, by all means you do whatever is needed but please don’t walk in there with the intention of spilling blood or starting a fight.”
I take another breath, slowing down the nerves and apprehension but not letting either stop what I want to say. “They use their designation and fists to keep people isolated so they’re easier to control. I get that. I’ve lived that life, but if I don’t try and break the cycle, they’ve won. Bringing change is hard. But what if someone who is stuck in a similar situation like I was is watching to see what I do? They see me resorting to violence, and the message they focus on is violence is the only answer. What if because of that they stop hoping, and simply accept the situation they’re in. I get I am no-one here, but there are eyes and ears everywhere. You have to take risks, and make decisions that might be wrong, but they might be right too.”
When I stop talking, I’m as speechless as they are. I worry, of course I do, but not because of what I said.
Dominic’s hands curl slowly around my hips, and he pulls me so he is all around me. “Amore Mio, our kind-hearted Omega, with the sweetest voice, we hear every word you say, and those you think. You have a beautiful, forgiving heart. I have all the documentation ready, as we discussed, to reiterate your generous offer that they stay alive when each and every fucking one of them should be slowly tortured. We will not start anything, and you know that.”
I nod. I trust them with everything I am. I also know despite me wanting a peaceful resolution, the likelihood of no blood being spilled is less than zero. But if I gave up hope I would not be where I am now. “I want to be better. One day my better might be me changing my mind about him, and how he should pay for his sins. And that’s fine because this is my journey. If I rush in now immediately choosing bloody retribution, it’s counterproductive, reactive only. And what he did to me deserves more than that.”
Hendrix also rubs his hand over my shoulder. I interlace our fingers, Dominic’s hand rests on my lower back and Ryder is in easy reach.
“Is this benefaction or validation?” Dominic scoffs when he reads the sign behind the admissions desk, proudly welcoming visitors to the Henderson Wing of Armitage General Hospital.
“But they are such pillars of society, Dom. They deserve all the respect their money brings,” I say, the sarcasm dripping off each word.
He rolls his eyes. I get it, and I love that we have the same view. The founding family are crass and showy. This is what they’re all about, recognition and power mongering.
They can have it. I just want to get out of their world.
“We can drive past the education precinct on our way out of town if you like. I’ll point out Vanderling Sports Centre, Benton Library… the Benton’s are the newest addition to the founding family collective. They’re noticeably behind in wealth and power which directly relates to how many buildings, awards and scholarships are named after them. In all honesty, they’re in that stage of still proving themselves and th eir loyalty to the others. Just don’t mention it. It’s a sore subject.”
Benton money is new money. No matter what they do, the Vanderlings, Hendersons, and Armitages will never regard them equals. It used to worry me how the other families talked about them with such disrespect, now though, I hope it festers and eats at them, eroding away the foundation of their power base.
My oddly timed sharing of our family workings ends abruptly as we wait for the receptionist to stop talking on the phone. There is no professionalism here. Making me wait is all about reminding me of my place, because both the ladies working the desk know me. Belinda Benton, granddaughter of the Alpha in charge of the Benton family, and her co-worker, second cousin Annalee, both attended my going away party. Along with every other event the founding families have held.
The call she’s on ends after a few long, drawn-out minutes.
“Yes?” Belinda is apparently running with the whole ‘we’ve never met’ angle.
I literally don’t care. All her attitude does is serve as a reminder of the endless posturing we’re going to be subjected to.
“I’m here to see Lawson. Wren is expecting me.”
The set of her mouth into a bitchy sneer says it all.
Hendrix stares through her, while he leans down to kiss the top of my head. “Come on, sweetheart, I’m sure we’ll find our way.”
I hold her stare, letting Hendrix guide us away.
Then she moves. Fast, like she has dogs snapping at her heels, trying to block the entrance.
“Family only in High Dependency.”
She focuses on me, not even looking at my pack. Hendrix completely ignores her posturing, simply side stepping around her impression of a starfish, leaving her open mouthed and red faced.
“Honestly?” Ryder laughs at the drama.
“It’s going to be a circus, Rye.”
I reach out to hit the button for the lift, but he beats me to it, pressing the button and catching my hand in one smooth move. The warmth of his touch settles my unease. Today was never going to be easy, but with my pack, it will be a whole lot better.
Dominic pulls me close, holding me to his chest as the lift takes us up to High Dependency, the doors open and we walk out.
Straight into an ambush.