Violet
Benji was mad at me. That much was obvious.
As the five of us sat around the breakfast table, Benji kept shooting me lingering glances, each one dissecting a different piece of me, and I did my best to act normal.
Slowly, I cut my pancake into even triangles, trying not to gag as the half-cooked strawberries bled into the melted chocolate chips. To me, it looked like bits of flesh had fallen out of someone, and my stomach rioted at the thought of eating it.
Vinny had told me to ask Benji if I wanted something else.
And I did. But I wouldn’t be caught dead asking Benji for anything. Not right now.
So I picked at the neatly cut grapes on the edge of my plate.
Benji stopped chewing and watched me.
“Violet, you need to feed the baby.” He pointed at my stomach, then to my plate.
I blinked, caught off guard.
I’m trying, I signed, before going back to nudging the grapes around.
“Trying isn’t eating.”
He didn’t sound angry, just worried. But his voice was clipped, like he was holding something back. “You’re already thin. The baby needs nutrients. That’s not optional. Skye is a good boy. He eats.”
Vinny’s knife clinked against his plate.“You don’t get to boss around my omegas,” he said, not looking up. “Violet is fine.”
Benji’s jaw twitched as he looked down at his plate.
“Some of us are bonded to her via marks,” he muttered, unbuttoning the top of his chef’s coat and pointing to one of the bite scars on his shoulder. “Violet is starving. She needs to eat.”
“Hey, can we maybe not get into an alpha-beta dick measuring contest?” Serena said, raising her coffee mug.
Skye hummed in agreement, mouth full.
I had no idea how Benji could feel that I was hungry, because I sure as hell couldn’t.But if he could feel it, could Skye and Serena too?
Serena’s mark connected the four of us like a circuit—and the idea that my needs might inconvenience them made my stomach twist even harder.
“We are not having a measuring contest,” Benji said tightly, forcing a smile Serena’s way. “It’s my job, as your beta, to care for you, and our omegas. She’s hungry. That’s not up for debate.”
The emphasis on our wasn’t subtle.
“Munequita, would you like something else?” he asked gently.
All eyes shifted to me. I didn’t like it.
My fork hovered uselessly over the grapes. My stomach had twisted harder under their attention.
I shook my head. This wasn’t like my usual not-wanting-to-eat, it felt like a food aversion. Nothing to worry about.
“She said she’s fine,” Vinny grunted.
Benji didn’t move. But his jaw clenched once, and I knew he didn’t believe me.
“Let me know if that changes,” he said finally.
Thank you, I signed quietly.
The rest of the meal passed without issue, and no one said a word when I gave my untouched pancake to Skye. He was in his third trimester, I think, he needed it more than I did.
After breakfast, Vinny and Serena left for a meeting about yesterday’s incident, and Skye went down for a nap. I stayed behind, thinking maybe I’d help Benji clean up.
It was a small thing. But it might prove I could be useful. Plus, this morning he’d said he needed help.
When I padded over to the sink, Benji didn’t look at me. He just slid a few plates into the water and stepped aside, leaving enough room for me to join.
I grabbed the sponge, turned on the faucet, and started scrubbing.
He dried each plate I handed him in silence. But I could feel the weight building, like thunder behind the clouds.
After the third plate, he sighed.
“You don’t need to do this,” he said.
I shrugged and kept scrubbing.
The dish towel twisted in his hands.
“You changed your dress,” he said next, glancing over at me.
My face heated.
I hadn’t wanted to change, but, thanks to Vinny, my first dress was wet.
I looked down at the blue gingham, suddenly self-conscious. Normally my dresses were flowy, soft, paired with a sweater. This one hugged more than it should. Vinny had picked it. I’d let him.
I flicked my fingers to ask if Benji liked it.
“The cherry dress is my favorite,” he said, lips twitching. “I like you in red. But, it’s nice to see the baby.”
He nodded toward my stomach, and I stood a little straighter, hand drifting to rest over the curve.
I still hadn’t told anyone it would be twins.I didn’t know how.
“You’re getting rounder,” Benji said. “That’s good. It means your body’s doing what it’s supposed to.”
I nodded slowly. The emotion in my throat rose too fast to name—pride, maybe. Or dread.
My body was doing what it needed to do. What it had failed to do so many times before.
For the last two years, I’d blamed myself.
But now I wondered if I’d just had the wrong alpha.
Maybe I should let Vinny mark me.
The thought startled me the second it formed. It wasn’t a full idea yet, just a whisper of one. But it was enough to shake me.
I blinked down at the water, the edge of a plate blurred through the suds.
Why can’t I just let myself love him like I love the rest of them? Why does loving Vinny feel like opening a wound?
“How are you feeling?” Benji asked, pulling me back from my thoughts.
The same way I always felt when I was away from Vinny. Tired. A little sick. But I knew the second I curled up in his lap and pressed my face to his neck, I’d feel better.
Fine, I signed.
Benji’s gaze didn’t budge.
“I can feel that you’re lying,” he said softly. “That’s what a bond does.”
He leaned back against the counter, soaking the hem of his jacket in dishwater.
I dried my hands and signed. How?
Benji blinked, then reached up and unbuttoned his coat. He pointed to one of the smaller bite scars on his skin.
“Serena’s mark,” he said, nodding toward the matching scar on my shoulder. “It creates a circuit. If something’s off, the bond lets us know. Can you not feel us?”
I shook my head.
Maybe missing Vinny’s mark left my circuit open.
Benji’s expression softened. “If you weren’t pregnant, I wouldn’t push you to accept Vinny’s mark.”
My stomach flipped.
What do you know? I signed slowly.
He paused. Then asked, “At your first appointment, did they tell you pregnancy would be hard with fresh or nonexistent bonds?”
I nodded.
“Did they tell you why?”
I searched my memory, but all I could recall was the phrase bond rot. Not the science. Not the reason.
I shook my head.
Benji took the towel from my hands and tossed it aside. Then he lifted me like I weighed nothing and set me gently on the counter. My heart fluttered.
His hands bracketed my thighs, and he leaned in, nose nearly brushing mine. I froze.
“They tell you that because having a pack ensures you’re cared for,” he said. “Betas, alphas… even omegas to a degree. We all feel your needs. Betas feel it the strongest—it’s what we do.”
His thumb traced along my jaw.
“Violet, you’re starving. Do you know that?”
I looked down at my stomach, confused. I had been hungry at breakfast. But the feeling had vanished. I thought it was just the pancakes.
Breakfast looked gross, I signed. No offense.
“None taken. But that doesn’t answer my question.”
He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “You’re so hungry my stomach hurts. Did you know that?”
I shook my head, ashamed.
“Do you know why you don’t feel it?”
Another slow shake.
He lifted my chin again, voice gentler this time.
“Because your bond is starting to rot.”
I went still.
“You’re near Vinny. Your body wants the bond. But you’re not giving in. So your body is conserving energy to protect the baby. Omegas without a pack will go weeks without eating. They’ll starve. That’s just one way bond rot kills.”
Starve to death.
“This isn’t to scare you, Munequita,” he whispered. “It’s the truth. Your body was built to survive with a pack, not in spite of one. And Vinny… he’s rough, but he’s a good alpha.”
I knew that. In my soul, I knew it.
My hands trembled in my lap.
“Sweet girl,” Benji murmured, forehead resting against mine, “where did you come from that made it so hard to trust him?”
I looked away, blinking hard.
I wanted to tell him. To explain everything. But how do you describe being trained not to trust? Being touched without consent and told it was love? How do you say you were marked by Logan Stellar and that if this pack ever found out, they’d never look at you the same?
My hands stayed limp in my lap.
“You don’t have to tell me,” Benji whispered. “Not today. Not ever. But someone broke something sacred in you. And it’s hard to heal when you're missing pieces of yourself. I just want to help you.”
A soft sob broke free before I could stop it.
He wrapped me in his arms and lifted me gently from the counter, cradling me like the act alone could glue me back together.
“You’re not broken,” he whispered into my hair, “and I promise you–Vinny, Serena, Skye, and I–we’re all here to stay.”
I wanted to believe him. Gods, I did. But some things were easier said than done.
I buried my face in his neck, breathing in the comfort of chai and warmth, trying to replace old memories with something real.
“I know you’re scared of letting him close,” Benji said, “that’s why I had him sleep with your bunny.”
My breath caught.
“It’s in his room,” he continued. “Covered in his pheromones. If you hold it, it’ll help you feel better.”
I blinked at him.
“But,” he added gently, “don’t keep it with you if you’re not going to snuggle it. It can make you sicker.”
Make me sicker? I signed.
“It’s like your body thinks it’s getting what it needs, Vinny, but if you don’t accept the comfort, it confuses the bond. That confusion makes it decay faster.”
He brushed away a tear I hadn’t realized had fallen.
“You don’t have to rush,” he said. “But when you’re ready, let yourself be comforted. That’s all I’m asking.”
I nodded slowly, throat tight, heart aching.
Benji tucked another piece of hair behind my ear.
“Now,” he said gently, “first thing’s first. You need to eat. What do you want?”
I tried to think of something. Anything. But nothing came to mind. Well–nothing food-related.
Can Reed come over? I signed.
Benji smiled. “Of course. You’re our family, which means now your brother is too.”
He paused, giving me a soft look.
“But if he comes over, you have to promise me you’ll eat.”
My fingers twitched. I didn’t want to lie. But I didn’t want to say no, either.
I’ll try.
“That’s enough for me,” he said, kissing my forehead. “Trying is a start.”
The knot in my chest loosened, just a little.
Reed was the only piece of my old life that didn’t hurt to remember. The only thing untouched by Logan. And I needed him now more than ever.
Just thinking of seeing him again made me feel homesick for a life I could never go back to.
But maybe, this new life could start to fill the void.