Chapter Twenty-Seven
Shade
I blink hard and almost choke on my tongue.
‘Did she just ask for Knox?’
"Knox. Please, will you… can I?" Her voice is soft and blurred at the edges, slurring in that unmistakable tone that tells us she’s entered Omega headspace. There's a pitch to it that makes the air feel heady, almost like there is a sub-harmonic purr beneath each word.
Knox freezes and panic flickers across his fractured composure.
I should have seen this coming. Every time she overextends herself, this is the fallback.
A neurological drop into regression. She’s depleted.
Her endocrine system is on tilt, and her instincts are begging for regulation.
She needs physical touch, familiar scent, and emotional tethering.
It's textbook. I should know, I collected the data and wrote a report on the subject.
What isn’t textbook is Halley asking for Knox.
She never asks for our Prime Alpha when she's like this. It's Viper and sometimes me, occasionally Blaze, but never Knox.
“You heard her,” I murmur, watching my reeling brother. “She wants you, Prime.”
His head shakes, a firm denial.
"Omega Specialist Sparks," he says, his tone strained but insistent. "You want Viper to take care of you, don’t you?"
He tries to shift her weight to pass her to Viper, but she snarls, a low, possessive sound from deep in her chest, and clutches him tighter.
There’s no mistaking it. This isn’t some residual attachment to the closest Alpha. She knows exactly who she wants to hold her in this vulnerable state.
It's been so long since we've seen her like this. So raw and needy. In our wounded state, it’s been easier to think of her as a selfish harpy who hurt us on purpose. Looking at her now, it's impossible to continue thinking that way.
She is what she has always been. An Omega whose softness was forced behind steel. A creature made for connection, now unraveling.
And Knox?
He is frozen. He looks down at her like she’s just started ticking and he has no idea which wire to cut.
"Oh, nut up and hold the girl, would ya, Prime?" Blaze snorts. “I’ve seen you handle live grenades with less protesting.”
"Knox, I promise I’ll behave. I’ll be good, just don’t let me go. Please,” Halley whispers, her voice low and mewling. It’s a sound meant only for her Alpha. Private and intimate.
She presses herself into his body, curling and rubbing against him with instinctual precision. She buries her nose in his chest and inhales, as if scent alone can fix the lonely ache beneath her skin.
His hands hover, hesitant, like even holding her might break her.
If she were in her right mind, she’d probably laugh at how fast she disarmed our most emotionally impenetrable teammate. She might even throw in a smug little smile, just to make sure he never forgot it.
Except, Omega Specialist Halley Sparks isn't here right now.
Instead, a five-foot-nothing, pleading, submissive little Omega is in her place. Her usually sharp eyes are unfocused and glassy, her lips are parted, and her cheeks are flushed. She's panting, her chest rising and falling.
She shifts her hips against him, slow and searching, until he shifts her slightly, readjusting their hips so her movement no longer grinds against him.
She huffs and struggles in his arms, frustrated at being denied the friction she craves.
"Why won’t you touch me, Alpha?" she cries, her voice cracking at the edges. "Don’t you want me? I’ll be the best Omega. Just give me a chance."
Even without an inner Alpha pulling the strings of my instincts, that plea is devastating.
Knox frantically looks at Viper for help.
'What the fuck do I do, LT?' he projects, jaw ticking with discomfort.
Viper climbs to his feet, shaking off the last of Halley’s Omega Command, and just crosses his arms with a raised eyebrow. He’s not stepping in. Not this time.
To his credit, I didn’t think Viper would be able to stay out of it.
He’s usually first in line when she gets like this.
But he’s keeping his distance and offering no gentle words or soft touches, not even a flicker of hesitation.
He meant it when he said he’d give the rest of us time to bond with her, and he’s actually doing it.
The thread in my heart, our Pack bond, hums with a golden warmth. It’s pleased and content with his sacrifice.
Knox, however, is not pleased that his lieutenant has denied his request for help. So, like the strategist he is, he adjusts his plan.
He turns to me. ‘Take her,’ he says with a beseeching look.
I shrug and shake my head. 'Like Blaze said, she’s not a damn grenade. Halley’s easy to handle when she’s like this. She’s sweet and soft and just wants you to show her how much you care. Hold her. Tell her she's a good Omega. Make her feel safe,' I encourage.
Knox's brows furrow, and he looks down at Halley.
"Alpha," she says, a vibrato plucking at her vowels.
A purr starts softly and grows louder and louder. Her chest resonating the sound.
It spreads over me like smooth butter and I feel my muscles relax. I sag, the emotional load on my shoulders lightening.
I’d forgotten that she could do this. Make a grown man melt with a simple purr. If it didn’t feel so good, I’d call it a weapon.
For a second I see Knox soften, the crease between his brows easing as he lets her purr sand down the sharp edges of his anxiety.
“Kiss me again?” she asks, breathy and eager.
Knox stiffens and recoils like she’s slapped him.
“I can’t,” he says, stiff and clipped, and he forces himself to look away from the little siren in his arms. ‘This isn’t… I can’t be that for her.’
'Can't, or won't?' I counter.
That earns me a look sharp enough to cut steel.
I just shrug. He can glare all he wants, it won’t make me wrong. He needs to hear it, even if it scrapes against his insecurities.
Knox is still grappling with letting go of his Prime Alpha training.
He wants to. We wouldn’t be here in this crumbling fortress as freshly defected soldiers if he didn’t, but letting that side of himself go doesn’t happen overnight.
Undoing that kind of conditioning is slow work.
It’s like rooting malware out of an ancient system that’s been patched too many times and never updated properly.
One wrong line of code, and the whole thing crashes.
Knox has spent his whole life avoiding softness. He’s good at control. Violence, strategy, discipline? He can handle all that without blinking. But this? A warm, needy Omega whispering that she’ll be good if he just touches her? That was never part of his programming.
It’s not that he doesn’t want her. If anything, that’s the problem. He wants her too much. Always has. Even during her early training, when she’d challenge his orders and test his patience just to see what she could get away with, he was watching her closer than he should have been.
Fraternizing with a subordinate is strictly forbidden in the military, especially for Prime Alphas. So he kept his distance. Used his prickly personality as cover and played it safe.
But a connection between an Alpha and Omega doesn’t just stop because the rules say so.
And now she’s pressing into him and asking for his love and care, and all of that pent-up desire is close to erupting.
I’ve seen him face a thousand enemies without flinching. Watched him sprint through live fire, drag teammates out of bomb craters, and tear apart obstacles like they were paper. He’s never looked this rattled.
Knox places his hands on her shoulders to push her back, but his fingers are shaking. His whole body’s trembling, tight like a wire pulled too far as he fights against the effects of her purr.
"Omega. Halley, I can't," he says, and it comes out like it hurts to say. “Not yet. I have to take this slow. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Alpha,” she cries, and a tear slips down her cheek.
It cracks him, and it all comes spilling out through our Pack bond.
It hits like an emotional gut punch. A surge of guilt, sorrow, and raw, scorching desire, so intense I forget to breathe.
It's not mine.
It's Knox’s.
I inhale sharply, the pain curling under my ribs like hot smoke.
Fuck.
Viper wavers, and I know he feels it too.
As a squad, we’ve shared a lot of things. A barracks, missions, endless fucking death. We've even adapted to hearing each other's thoughts, but feeling each other in our hearts like this? It’s as terrible as it is great.
It's as if he's there, right in my chest. His distress is sharp and visceral, like burning embers of agony. I feel closer to my Prime Alpha than ever before, but also like I don’t know him at all.
I press my hand to my sternum, right over the ache.
He wants to touch her, to fuck his good little Omega like his inner Alpha craves, but to do that, he has to offer her comfort and his own vulnerability.
He has to open himself to her and he can’t.
Not yet, anyway.
He thought he could. That because he made the choice to defect and followed her, it would be enough but…
He still has work to do on himself.
I sigh, and I see the same understanding settle on Viper’s tense shoulders.
Knox isn’t exaggerating. He’s telling the complete truth.
He can’t.
And instead of smothering it and denying his weakness, he’s asking for help. He’s showing us where his weak spot is and trusting that we won’t use it to hurt him.
The Pack bond quivers. Strengthening. Cracks healing over. This is progress. This is the hard work it takes to become a true Pack.
I inhale and snap into action, certain of what needs to happen.
This is what I’m for. This is what I do. I protect the people I love, even when the threat is coming from inside them.
I protect my Pack from themselves.
I step forward and lower my voice. “Hey there, baby girl,” I say softly, sliding my arm over Halley’s shoulders and gently pulling her into my arms. “Let’s get you somewhere soft and safe, okay?”
She fights against me, desperate to get back to Knox.
“No, no, no! Knox, please. I can make it better. Let me make it better,” she sobs, reaching for him and scrambling.
Her purr kicks up another notch as her inner Omega screams at her to soothe her Alpha.
“Halley…” He sounds pained, but doesn’t reach to take her back.
“Why don’t you want me?” she cries, thrashing harder.
My heart breaks for her just like it breaks for him.
I clutch her closer, restraining her clawing hands.
Instead of answering, Knox takes a stumbling step back, scrubbing a hand through his hair, eyes wild.
“Shh, shh, baby girl.” I hold her close and rock her gently until she softens into the affection.
Her purr is still loud and searching. Reaching for him with pleading determination.
Even in her softest, most primal state, our girl is a fighter.
I tuck her closer to my chest, her head underneath my chin.
Her purr sends vibrations trembling through my arms, and an all encompassing relief slides through me.
It’s potent and drags me under a blanket of comfort.
It strikes me that even with Halley purring, a biological tool built specifically to suppress his anxieties, Knox still couldn’t turn off his inner turmoil.
‘Take care of her,’ he says through our bond. He casts one last, longing look at Halley, then turns and marches swiftly, like if he doesn’t leave now, his emotions will split him open.
Blaze is staring at the doorway Knox walked through. This time, his eyes are clear and focused. He digs his nails into the skin over his heart, pressing his palm hard like he’s trying to feel something deeper.
‘I felt that,’ his voice echoes through the link.
And it’s him. Not the spiteful creature that has been inhabiting our brother for months. This is the real Blaze. He’s present and aware, riding the same emotional current the rest of us were pulled into. Did he feel how our Pack bond shivered and healed? Has it brought him back to us?
Viper releases a shuddering breath. 'I'm going after him,' he projects to us, then turns and lumbers after our Prime.
He knows how deep that cut went. Knox shouldn’t be alone right now.
I want to go too, but the small figure in my arms shifts closer, rubbing her face into my shirt with a low, needy sound. Her scent spikes again, warm and clinging, full of instinct and trust.
That decides it. Viper will have to be enough for Knox, because right now, another member of our Pack needs me.
I can hold us together long enough for Knox to rally himself.
I lower my head and speak close to her ear. "It’s okay sweet thing. They’ll be back. In the meantime, let's see if we can make you a nest."
Halley peeks up from beneath my chin, her large purple eyes swimming and blinking rapidly. She squeaks in a high-pitched voice, “A nest?”
The sound she makes is so small, so hopeful, it hits me right in the chest.
I smile. How could I forget how adorable she is like this?
Her trust is a gift worth protecting at all costs.
"Not just any nest, sweetheart. Your nest."
Her purr kicks up again, and suddenly everything feels like it’s going to be alright.