Chapter Forty-Four
Knox
I can’t stop thinking about how hot, wet, and willing she felt around my fingers.
She mewled and moaned for me, desperate for my touch. Slick poured over my fingers, and when I tasted her, it was better than any victory on the battlefield.
I am a fucking idiot for not taking her sooner.
Why did I deny myself, and my Pack, the right to claim every inch of that pliant body for so long?
Before Halley, sex was nothing more than a passing curiosity. I have always appreciated the female form from a distance. They are beautiful, but fragile. To touch them meant accepting softness and letting them too close to my body, my mind, and my control.
Tenderness has never been compatible with the life I lead. I am a Prime Alpha. My place is at the front, leading soldiers into war. Attachment was a risk. A distraction. And if there is one thing I excel at more than anything, it is self-control.
Besides, my hand was enough to satisfy my needs.
Occasionally, when the heat of battle still pumped through my veins, I'd allow an eager male Beta soldier to suck me off. I even allowed Blaze to get his mouth on me once or twice when he pushed his luck far enough.
Then she appeared. Omega Halley Sparks.
One look into those violet eyes and something in me caught fire. A single defiant set of her jaw and my blood surged, heat knifing straight to my cock. I have never experienced such constant, blinding arousal.
My virginity became a mark of weakness. Another reason I was unworthy to be her mate. Untested and untried. I didn’t know how I’d behave during the act, and a good Prime Alpha will never go into battle without all of the information and skills required for success.
I have always known my inner Alpha is more animal than most. The need for dominance is never far from the surface, and when it comes to Halley, it prowls closer than ever.
The things I want to do with her are nothing like the sweet way Viper handles her, or the careful way Shade measures every touch, or even the teasing games Blaze plays.
What lives inside me is not tender.
My Alpha wants her in complete submission.
He wants her face pressed into the dirt, her breath hitching as I take her in the most primal way possible.
When Viper had Halley splayed open, her thighs hooked over his elbows and her pretty pink petals dripping her slick, I still wasn't sure I could be gentle.
But I could follow orders.
Thank rut for LT and his commanding voice that kept my head clear.
I thought it was game over when they learned that I had never been with a woman. I expected them to finally see the flaw I have been keeping hidden. That I do not know how I will react with her under my hands, so open and vulnerable. That I might hurt her.
And then Halley did what she always does. She turned my weakness on its head.
She actually liked that I had never touched another. She liked that her pussy would be the first, and the only, I would ever know.
There was not one flicker of apprehension on her face. Not a single muscle tensed in hesitation. She gave me her trust completely, and in that moment, she handed me the strength I needed to push past my own doubts.
Just thinking about how responsive she was has my pants tightening anew.
I rest my face on my hand, disguising a subtle sniff of my fingers. The scent of her delectable slick lingers on my skin, and I have to force myself not to lick again.
Why, oh why, didn't I eat her out like a man starved? ‘Cause I am. I’m fucking ravenous for her.
In fact, I should’ve shoved my fears aside and taken her there and then.
I know now that she likes that I’m rough with her. A surprise I’m going to be eternally grateful for. I bet she’d take whatever my Alpha unleashed upon her and beg for more.
My cock is not pleased with my restraint.
But there is time.
Once we have claimed her and are mated there will be plenty of time to master every way to make Halley Sparks break apart for me.
I do not do things by halves. I am the best of the best in all that I do.
And I have forever with her to learn every sound, every shiver, every plea that will have her screaming my name.
"Excuse me? Mister Alpha, sir?" a timid voice chimes.
I jerk back to reality, sit up straight, and extend my hand to receive the incoming survivor’s intake forms.
Prime Alpha Zero has assigned our Pack to roles within the processing camp.
I'm no stranger to paperwork and strategic allocation of supplies; therefore, I am assisting with gathering data from the survivors, assessing their individual skill sets, and assigning them to a settlement where they will be of best use to the fledgling community.
The girl in front of me is young. Definitely not old enough to be the mother of the infant she’s clutching.
I scan her form again. She checked the box requesting to be reunited with her family.
"Do you know where your family were sent?" I ask.
The girl shakes her head, tears gathering in her eyes. The child on her hip clings to her with all their might.
"N—no,” she stammers. “I'm sorry. When those bad people came to our home, my sister gave me her baby and told me to run. She said the family would meet us here. I… we must be the first to arrive."
Her voice cracks on the last word.
I think she already suspects what I know. The odds her sister survived are almost nonexistent. If the Human army got that close, it is pure luck these two are even sitting in front of me now.
I give her a slow, measured nod of encouragement and the most reassuring smile I can manage.
She flinches at it.
I drop the smile.
In hindsight, I should not be the one in a front-facing position. While my leadership skills are optimal for soldiers. I lack the soft touch these traumatized civilians need.
"Can you find them?" she asks, desperation straining her voice.
I scan the growing crowd. Dozens are waiting in line, shifting from foot to foot, pleading eyes on me. I’m their ticket to salvation. Their lifeline. More arrive every minute, and the flow will not slow down.
My military training as a Prime Alpha is clear. No special treatment. No exceptions. Resources and attention must be distributed evenly, or the entire operation risks collapsing.
And yet… her eyes are still on me.
I hesitate. Halley’s sweet face flickers in my mind, and I can almost hear the disappointment in her voice if I told her I ignored a plea for help from someone this vulnerable.
Damn Omega has changed me irrevocably.
I grudgingly accept that I’m about to bend the rules.
And that’s okay.
Prime Alpha Knox of the Fathim army no longer exists. I am not here as a soldier under orders. I am here as a volunteer. I have no Commander to answer to. I am my own Alpha, and I will decide the path I take.
I make a notation on the intake form and I call for one of the volunteers. They aren't soldiers, but civilians who have stepped up to aid in the evacuation.
“Yes, Prime Alpha Knox?” he asks, his voice timid, his gaze fixed somewhere near my boots.
I am not trying to intimidate him. I simply do not know how to turn it off.
“Search our records for…” I glance down at the form, scanning for the name.
The handwriting is a messy scrawl I can barely make out. It tells me what I already suspected. This young woman has never received a formal education.
How far has Fathim fallen if we cannot even teach our people to write their own names?
I feel cheated. The oath I swore to protect this land now feels cheap and tarnished.
I have given my entire life to fighting the Human invasion, believing every drop of blood spilled was in service of a righteous cause. I told myself the slaughter was justified, that I was defending a prosperous homeland worth protecting.
Two hundred and eighty-nine soldiers died under my command at Dunefold Fortress.
They laid down their lives for their fellow Demi-humans.
But while they fought and bled, who was protecting their families from the rot eating away at the inside of our country?
Who protected them from the corruption within?
They gave the ultimate sacrifice. And our government failed to uphold their end of the oath.
Frustration burns through me, a hot pulse under my skin. My Alpha wants to growl, to bare its teeth.
I swallow it back down.
"... Mia Proudfoot," the girl supplies her name with a quiver in her voice.
I nod, amend the file, and pass it to the assistant.
"Search our intake records for Miss Proudfoot's family. If they came through here, find where they were sent and reunite them," I say, trying not to provide too much hope.
Even if her kin somehow survived the initial attack on their homes, they may have encountered Human forces on their journey here. Most likely, they never made it this far. I wish I could give her an immediate answer, but everything here is being done in analog.
Shade’s tech-obsessed heart practically stopped when he realized there was no database.
Every name and record, all on paper. It was almost worth the chaos to see him chastise Prime Alpha Zero before storming off with his tablet, muttering under his breath.
I have no doubt he will have a functioning system in place before nightfall.
“Thank you… thank you so much, Mister Alpha,” she gushes, relief softening her thin shoulders.
I clear my throat and rub my lower lip with my thumb. “Yes, well, that is what we are here for, Miss Proudfoot.”
It's the first time I've been thanked by a civilian. Usually they cower in fear, as if my mere presence is a threat. I've never been a 'nice guy' before. It's refreshing.
"You're welcome," I say, the words feeling clumsy on my tongue. "While you wait for news about your family, head on over to the supplies tent."
She stands and clutches the baby on her hip tightly.
The pup, a little girl I think, is taking in the constant movements around the camp. Soldiers, volunteers, and survivors all moving with purpose.