Chapter Thirteen
Sylvia
When I asked him to shift, I half expected a little pushback. Sharing one’s beast for the first time was a huge deal, and I was asking him to do it without reciprocating. A big ask.
Dax acted like it was no big deal. What floored me more than that was when he thanked me for letting him know what I needed. Dax was unlike any other alpha I’d ever met, in the very best of ways.
After his shift, his wolf lay at my feet as I painted. I’d never felt safer than in those moments.
This wolf I barely knew was protecting me, and not in a scary show-your-teeth way. That would’ve creeped me out. No, he was calm and sweet, while at the same time ready to jump into action. My wolf was calmer than she’d ever been with him stretched out in front of us.
When I needed to get up to walk around, stretch a little, clear my mind so that I could look at my piece fresh, he came with me. We walked through the packlands. I wanted to tell him all about what we were seeing, but that wasn’t going to happen. This would have to do.
More than once, I found myself reaching down and petting him. Some wolves would have no part of that. Finding it was beneath them. They weren’t pets, after all. Dax leaned into my touch.
Why did I trust him so much? Was this all because of the scent matching?
Maybe. But it felt like more than that. There was something about Dax I connected to, as if we were kindred spirits.
We hadn’t discussed our pasts, but if I were to guess, his childhood held some badness, too.
I wanted to be very wrong about that. No one should have to suffer a tenth of what I’d been through.
The day slipped away, though I wasn’t ready for it to be over. Nor to invite him in to eat with us, too big a step for today. Painting like this was perfect, and I wanted to hold onto this moment for as long as I could.
Lily didn’t agree. She came out, her eyes falling straight to his wolf form, and put her hands on her hips. “It’s dark. You need to leave.”
He raised his head, gave a nod, then trotted back to his clothes. He put them on and left without so much as a goodbye, just a quick wave of his hand and holding up his phone, letting me know he would text me.
I signed why?
Lily and I had both been working on improving our signing. I’d picked up some from when I was “working” before my brother rescued me. One guest who came by that compound was deaf, and I picked up some signs from there, not that I ever dared risk practicing.
It was better for them to think I couldn’t communicate. It kept me safe. But between those signs and the ones Lily and I had been working on together, we’d gotten better.
“Why? Because how was that going to end?” Lily asked. “Were you going to ask him to join us to eat? That would be awkward for everyone. And then what? Wait for him to get bored? Because, trust me, he’s not going to. That man was going to stay put as long as you let him.”
She was probably right. Didn’t mean I had to like it.
“I suppose you could’ve had that awkward goodbye where you had to figure out if it was okay to hug him or not, or watch as he tried to feel out if he could kiss your cheek. Is that what you would like?”
I shook my head.
“This was the way; it ended on a good note for both of you. He left wanting more. He left with you wanting more. And his having to go was my doing. Lily the bad guy.”
I rolled my eyes. No one could look at Lily and think that about her.
She helped me collect my art supplies and bring them back inside then the two of us went to eat with the family. As I sat down, Lily explained to my brother what had just happened, and he gave her a fist bump.
It hit me. This was the first time in my life when I was truly surrounded by people who all loved me, and no one wanted me dead.
Yes, my mom loved me immensely, but there were always people lurking. I had little glimpses of memories flash by once in a while, and I’d never been safe. Not with my mom. Not when my brother and Tyrone found me. All three of them protected me with all that they had, but that wasn’t always enough.
But here I was safe. And everyone wanted me to stay that way. Life was really starting to fall into place.
What did that mean for my relationship with the alphas currently courting me? Only time would tell. But unless I felt as safe as I did here on their packlands, I’d never move. I’d lived too much of my life in fear, and I refused to do it anymore.