31. Chloe
CHAPTER 31
CHLOE
Clearing out my desk was making my eyes watery. It must be the dust in here or something. My workspace looked naked now that I had returned all of the textbooks. All that remained was a neat stack of graded essays and tests.
On top of the stack was a letter on fancy cardstock paper, informing me that I was the Valedictorian omega of my class.
I’d asked one of my professors point blank what I could do as a Valedictorian omega. She’d enthusiastically told me how it would open up doors for me to get introductions to high-status packs. Alphas working in the government, or even those with celebrity status tended to scope out the omega who’d earned the title of Valedictorian.
Yeah, the last thing that I wanted right now was to have to meet even more alphas. Helping Titus find his pack-mates had me meeting enough alphas to last a lifetime. Thanks but no thanks.
There were post-its everywhere—until now my life had been held together firmly by all of those bright bits of sticky paper. Each of them had dates and reminders of deadlines that had seemed so important to me.
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It felt wrong to just throw them away… what was I going to do with them? I peeled off each post-it and made them into a neat little stack. They went right on top of the fancy Valedictorian letter. Now all that was left was to throw the stack into my suitcase with the rest of my things, and I would be officially done with my time at the Institute.
But where would I go?
Brutus had sent texts about how he was taking me nest shopping, whatever that meant.
Daddy-Lo texted me that he could get here in half an hour, just let me know when I wanted him to pick me up.
Yeah. I couldn’t ignore this any longer.
I scrolled through my contacts to the only person who would be able to understand.
Me: Hey, I need to talk to you.
Me: Can you meet me at my dorm?
Kain: Alright, darling. I’ll be there in twenty.
I held Kain’s hand leading him through the hallways of the omega dormitory. It wasn’t too packed right now. There were parties going on with families down in the cafeteria. But there were still some curious omegas lingering around, and they were definitely paying attention to the hot blonde alpha walking through their territory.
I caught one omega wave shyly at Kain. I might have been annoyed enough to snap at her to get her own alpha, or glare at her or something. But if Kain noticed her, he didn’t show any sign of it.
That worked for me. I ignored the girl too .
As soon as the two of us were alone in my emptied out dorm, Kain pulled me into his arms, swinging me around in a circle.
“Congratulations on graduating. You busted your ass for this.” Kain grinned at me with his boyish, charming smile. He was like sunlight, and golden warmth—he felt like home. As he wrapped his strong arms around me, hugging me tight, Kain leaned in close to my ear and whispered, “so proud of you.”
I managed a weak smile in return.
Yay. Graduation…
“Brutus told me he invited you to live with us. Did you make your decision? Are you moving in with us?”
I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Like all the air was sucked straight out of me as I slowly shook my head, no.
God, all I wanted to do was to tell him yes. I was going to move in with them. I was ready to join their pack and bond them… but it wasn’t the truth.
Why did it feel like the earth was being ripped out from under me and I was falling?
Why did this feel like a goodbye?
The enthusiasm seeped out of Kain, like the slow leak of a helium balloon. What was worse was that it was all my own fault. I was the one who had stolen that enthusiasm away from him, and Kain had done nothing to deserve it. A part of me wanted to wipe the hint of sadness away from his brilliant blue eyes—the pain that I had put there.
But I had to do this.
“I just need some space. To think.”
“But you’re coming back to us, right? After you do what you need to do? After you have some time to figure this out?”
I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t say anything. This hurt too much.
Kain closed his eyes, and his voice went soft. “Are you breaking up with us? ”
What?
Breaking up was the last thing that I wanted to do. Is that what I was doing? What the fuck was I doing?
No.
I couldn’t lose them. That wasn’t what this was about.
I shook my head violently. “I j-just…” I started sniffling, and my eyes burned with tears that were making everything blurry, forcing myself to get the words out before I lost everything. “I don’t want to break up.”
Suddenly, warm arms were all around me. Kain held me close, brushing comforting patterns up and down my back.
I pulled just far enough away to get a look at him. Though his expression was strained, like he was forcing himself to appear composed, he wasn’t able to hide the pain in his eyes.
I hated this. I hated that I was the one who had hurt him, when Kain had been nothing but good to me.
One minute I was leaning in, drawn in to Kain’s brilliant blue eyes—they were an ocean, and I was so damn thirsty… all I wanted was to drown in them… until my lips were inches away from his…
The next moment his lips were locked with mine. Pressing against my mouth, feverishly hot.
I moaned at his touch, ready to lose myself, forget all the shit that had come between us to just fucking feel him. Just that rough slide, the delicious friction as his tongue moved against mine.
The scent of chocolate was heavy in the air, decadent and demanding. Smooth and rich, there was nothing but his creamy scent all around me and it was the only thing I wanted.
It wasn’t enough. I needed more of him.
I moved my hand under his shirt, needing to feel him. Sliding my palm against his warm skin, and the firm muscles tensing under my fingertips. I jerked his shirt up and out of the way.
Kain broke off our kiss, for long enough to rip his shirt off, in one smooth motion.
I didn’t even have enough time to stare at the perfection that was his athletic torso before he was on me, pressing hot open-mouthed kisses against my neck, until I was sinking into the heat of him.
Kain slid his fingers under my shirt, brushing against the skin of my belly in feather-light touches that were driving me insane. The slow trails he was weaving across my body all felt like they were lighting me on fire.
Then Kain was kissing my neck roughly, sucking down hard and pressing his teeth right against my sensitive skin.
I whimpered—it was right where we could bond. All he had to do was press down just a little harder. If he would just bite me. Bite me. He was right there, so close and he could make me his.
But then Kain broke away from my neck, with a groan. His eyes were hooded with lust, his pupils dark with want.
“Tell me to stop.” His voice was wild, frantic… as if he was as desperate as I was to burn down these walls that I’d thrown between us.
“Please…” my voice was high and breathless and filled with that same desperation. “Don’t stop.”
Kain gasped sharply before he was jerking off my shirt, unbuttoning my jeans and dragging them from my body.
My hands were behind my back, awkwardly reaching for my bra clasp. I’d barely unhooked it when Kain was tossing me down on my bed.
I moaned as he pushed his face right in between my thighs, laving at my pussy. He was devouring me. Kain lapped a path straight to my clit, as if my pussy was the sweetest cream and he was fucking starving.
Kain teased me, running one finger in a circular motion around my entrance, just how he knew I liked it, before sliding inside. Pressing against the walls of my pussy, finger fucking me roughly as he mouthed down harder against my clit and sucked.
Fuck.
My back arched off the bed. I shrieked as I came, bursting apart at the seams, with light sparks flashing across my vision. My pussy pulsed, vibrating in pleasure that shot across my limbs. Until I was left shaking with the ferocity of it, with my legs trembling uncontrollably.
Kain pressed one sweet kiss, gently right on top of my clit, before he stood upright. His heated gaze scorched my body as he unbuckled his pants, tugging them down roughly to free himself.
Kain wasted no time climbing over me on the bed, settling between my hips. With one rough thrust, he was inside me, all the way to the hilt.
Kain groaned, pulling his fat cock out of me, so I could feel every inch against my pussy, before diving back in. Hard. Creating a rough friction as he began to move.
This wasn’t like the thoughtful, rhythmic lover I’d come to know and love.
No.
Kain was fucking me. Pounding into me wildly and out of control. Slamming into me so hard that each thrust knocked the flimsy bedframe against the wall. Even as his balls slapped against my ass. Over and over.
Until I was nothing but a whimpering mess beneath him, powerless. All I could do was spread my legs open wider to welcome each hard thrust.
He was fucking into me hard enough to break through to me, shattering all the excuses I’d hidden behind.
He fucked the truth into me—that I was his. That I was made for him.
Fucking me hard enough until I had no choice but to see it, too.
Then he groaned, pushing his cock deeper into me as his knot thickened and swelled inside of me. His warm cum jetted deep inside of me, filling every empty space within me with everything he had.
As the two of us lay entwined together, a panting tangle of sweaty limbs, all of the words that had been jumbled up in my head suddenly sorted themselves out.
I looked into Kain’s eyes and he was looking back at me with pure devotion… like I was a goddess, even after everything I’d put him through.
I took a deep steadying breath. “I don’t want to lose you. But if I don’t do this, I feel like I’m going to lose myself.”
“I am yours.” Kain kissed my knuckles sweetly, butterfly soft. “Take all the time that you need, as long as you come back to me.”
I closed my eyes, as I nodded.
I wouldn’t be able to do this if I could see the heartbreak written all across his face.
But I had to. I was doing this to become the best version of myself. I had to reach out and see if I could grasp my dreams.
Then why did it feel like I was ripping out my own heart?