Chapter 6
Six
VIOLET
I roll over and pick up my phone without checking who’s calling.
First mistake.
Actually, the first mistake was thinking that Rylan might actually be a decent match for me at the gala last night. Or maybe it was circling back after I realized Jasper hadn’t noticed me just in time to hear him tell Rylan to stay the fuck away from me. Though really just being at the goddamn gala at all was obviously a bad decision. And then having to have Faedra pull me out of the bathrooms once I’d gotten enough control over myself to not weep hysterically where someone might actually see was certainly on my list of experiences I didn’t want to repeat. Ever.
So, really, answering my phone without making sure it isn’t my fucking mother is so low on the problem list right now, I can’t even manage to muster up the automatic defensive walls I wear around my heart any time we’re interacting.
“What the hell was that dress, Violet Fallon?”
Her voice is shrill and borderline hysterical, which means whatever photo she has pulled up has been the center of her attention for longer than the last five minutes.
“Good morning,” I say, ignoring her question.
What time even was it? Could I manage to drop back to sleep before having to grab our flight back to LA later this morning? And what the hell was my mother doing up so goddamn early?
She sucks in a breath before clicking her tongue against her teeth.
“When your father told me the cost of the dress you ordered, I assumed it would be presentable at the very least. You’ve lost all access to your trust until further notice, young woman.”
I hold back a sigh and sit up.
Joke’s on her. I haven’t touched that damn trust since the day I moved out of the house and into my small freshman dorm room with Faedra. I had to nearly drain my savings account to pay for that dress. Or at least, I would have if Father hadn’t stepped in and insisted on paying for it.
“You know these matches are incredibly important, Violet. It’s the single most important thing you will accomplish in your life. Scarlett was fit for a damn prince when I was finished with her.”
Where the hell were we, regency England? She acts like we’re part of the ton and she gets one chance to marry us off or something.
Sure, Scarlett looked amazing. She always did, the perfect canvas for our mother’s machinations. For all the good it did her.
I bite my tongue before I let slip my sister’s secret. It’ll be out soon enough, I suppose. Assuming the Council processes dissolutions as quickly as they do matches. Though I’m not holding my breath on that front.
“You will make a damn laughing stock, I swear. How dare you do this to me? I expect a formal apology posted by the end of the week.”
The line clicks dead, and I drop back onto my bed, keeping my eyes closed.
A few minutes later, there’s two soft knocks on the closed bedroom door.
“Violet?” Faedra’s soft voice soothes out the barbs left over from my mother. “The ride share is going to be here in about fifteen minutes. You good to go?”
I roll out of bed and throw on a set of leggings and my favorite UCLA hoodie, not bothering to actually brush my hair before pulling it into a claw clip. When I open the door, Faedra’s dressed similarly, though her hoodie is cropped and sports the logo of the Minnesota Wild. Shout out to Papa that I even know what team it is.
I pull out my phone and send him a quick message.
Headed back to school. Love you.
And then I send one to my father, too. My dads will know what it means.
The dress was perfect. Thank you. ??
You were gorgeous, darling. So proud of you.
“Good to go,” I say, not bothering to try for peppy. I shove my phone into the pocket of my hoodie.
Her lips twist into a frown, her eyes growing worried, but she nods. “You’ll talk to me if you need to, right?”
I blow out a breath and smile, relaxing as she visibly does, too. “Of course, Fae. You’re my best friend.”
I’ve done my best to forget Rylan for the last six months. Well, six weeks, at least, since finding out he stopped working at the Haven. And I’ve tried especially hard the last several days since the gala on Saturday, when I was confronted with his beautiful green eyes and that damn snake tattoo that haunts my fucking dreams.
Have I been successful?
My body shudders out an orgasm as I bite my lip hard enough to bleed, the small vibrations of my favorite vibrator nearly identical to the soft aftershocks pulsing down my legs.
No. I absolutely have not been successful.
I pull the small device away as my body grows sensitized and turn it off, letting myself relax into the bed even as my scent stays reasonably controlled. Thank the gods we live in LA where I can actually open the windows in the spring. Just another reason I can’t stand Seattle.
That and not having to interact with my mother more than absolutely necessary.
Thoughts of my mom drive away the lingering weightless feel induced by my vibrator and memories of Rylan’s knot. Before I can do much more than sigh, there’s two knocks on the door followed by Faedra’s soft voice, just like always.
“Vi, I know you’re in there. Can I come in, please?”
Shit .
I fly off the bed as I curse, cleaning the small pink bullet before tucking it into my nightstand and then throwing on a set of ripped jeans and the faded Florence + The Machine hoodie I’ve had since seeing them in concert when I was sixteen. My cheeks are still flushed when I open the door, but there’s not much to be done for it.
Faedra’s dressed in her typical floral skirt, her hair braided back and falling over one shoulder. Her eyebrow rises as she takes me in, and I scrunch my nose in a grimace.
“Don’t act like you haven’t been hot and bothered, too, Fae,” I mumble.
She leans against the doorframe and messes with her waistband.
“Wasn’t going to, Vi. Just didn’t realize that you were busy. You could have told me to wait.”
Not like I was actually in the middle of anything, though. And if I had just laid there for much longer, I would have ended up needing another round. And the amount of times I’ve needed to decompress with my vibrator over the last four days is honestly embarrassing. Especially since he didn’t even want me to meet his pack.
Probably because his pack includes Jasper fucking Miller .
Montegue. That’s what Rylan’s badge said. Jasper Montegue has a stupid good ring to it, if I’m being honest.
Ignoring the stab in my gut, I wave off her concern and cross the room to my desk, grabbing the nondescript envelope that’s been perched there since being handed to me early this morning.
“Did you get yours, too?” I ask, holding the blank envelope so she can see it. When she replies, my shoulders slump. “Finally. I’ve been staring at mine all morning.” When I haven’t been chasing the high I felt while knotted with Rylan, at least. My cheeks heat. “I didn’t want to open it alone.”
I drop onto my bed in an ungraceful lump, and Faedra settles next to me, her movements so fluid the bed doesn’t even jostle with her weight. She balances her own notice on her knee and messes with her hair, undoing it and then pulling it back fully into a new braid.
“What is it?” she asks, her eyebrows furrowing. “I don’t remember reading about this step.”
Maybe talking it through will help my nerves.
“They’ve settled on a list of packs for us and want us to rank them.”
I rip open the notice and pull both sheets of paper from it, ignoring the blank one that’s waiting for my ranking the packs and focusing instead on the list of cities.
Annapolis. Albany. Seattle. Bozeman. Los Angeles.
My breath catches.
“These are cities ,” Faedra says, her voice a mixture of confusion and offense.
I can’t help but laugh.
“The Council tries to keep outside influences from interfering with the matches.”
I set my list next to hers. None of our cities match. It’s not surprising, but my stomach still twists at the first permanent marker of our being separated in just a few weeks.
I keep my voice light. “By giving us cities, it decreases the chance of someone outside of the packs manipulating potential final pairings.”
Faedra blows out a breath, almost like a breathless scoff. “Outside influences like your mom?”
Being with her is so easy. She lifts my spirits when she doesn’t even realize I’m down for the count. It helps that she’s met my mother and seen firsthand exactly the type of person she is.
I purse my lips and nod before grabbing my list again. My gaze catches on Los Angeles again.
What are the odds that it’s Rylan? There must be at least a dozen registered packs that were at that gala that are registered with an address here. LA is absolutely gigantic. I drum my fingers on my knee.
Absolutely no way am I moving back to Seattle. It doesn’t matter if it’s the literal Prince of England in that pack. I’ll ask for reassignment faster than my mother scoffs at the fashion choices of her peers.
“What’s wrong, Vi?” Faedra’s soft question snaps me out of my thoughts. “You’ve been a nervous mess since we left the party. Did something happen you didn’t mention?”
She hadn’t asked any questions when she’d found me in the bathroom and I told her I wanted to leave. She’d simply looped her arm in mine and found a side entrance so we could avoid whatever media presence was still at the front of the hotel. She even paid for the ride share even though I know her budget is tighter than mine.
I breathe out an almost laugh. “Yeah, I met an Alpha. Just like you.”
She shoves me. “Why didn’t you tell me? Did he make you cry?” Her mouth thins and her gaze hardens. “If he did, I’ll make him regret it.”
I shrug, and she snarls. It’s pretty damn impressive given how freaking fragile she looks half the time. Not that I’d ever say that. I pin her with a look, running my hands over the list again, pressing it into the mattress like I can make the whole mess disappear completely.
“He didn’t make me cry.” Not right then, at least. “Jasper did.”
She laces her fingers with mine and holds on tight. “I’m sorry.”
I’ve told her about Jasper. Mostly. At least part of it. She knows I dated a Beta in high school and we broke it off. That his name was Jasper. She also knows that I had a nasty break up my senior year right before I committed to UCLA. That he broke up using a letter through my mother of all people, and that it had absolutely wrecked me. What she doesn’t know is that both of those were Jasper.
“Did you like his pack?” she asks after a while.
Liked? I loved him at one point. A sharp stab in my heart accompanies the thought. Probably still do, if I’m being entirely honest. But that doesn’t change what happened between us, how he left me when I was most vulnerable to start a new life somewhere else without me. How he abandoned me to my mother’s insidious ways just because I’d designated.
“He didn’t introduce them,” I say at last. “I really liked him.” And didn’t that feel good to admit, at least to the two of us? “But I’m worried about why he didn’t want me to meet the others.”
Which is true. He probably doesn’t even realize I saw the interaction between him and Jasper. Why didn’t he want me to meet Jasper? And why was Jasper convinced matching with me would be so horrible?
Probably the same reason why he left you in the dust in Seattle .
Goddamn, that awful voice in my head is loud today. Faedra hums under her breath as she presses her lips to my temple, her hold tightening on my hand. The tension and worry slowly bleed from me.
“He told me where he lives.” Not technically, but I do know that he lives here. He didn’t mention moving when he explained why he wasn’t working at the Haven anymore. “And it’s on here.”
“Do you want advice or support?”
To get advice, I’d have to come clean with the whole fucked up mess, and that’s not something I want to uncover right now. My smile this time is more genuine.
“Just support.” Time to turn this back on her. “Did your guys tell you where they live?”
She shakes her head, her gaze dropping to the list again. She messes with her orbital piercing.
“I suppose it’ll be fate that pairs us together. I’m going to take the day to think about it and then rank them on where I’d like to live.”
Shit. That’s a really good plan. Maybe I should do that, too.
“Good plan, Fae,” I admit.
Forget that Rylan lives here. That Jasper must live here, too, then. Forget that my mom is in Seattle. Rank them based on where seems most appealing to me right now. I glance down at the cities again.
I’m not entirely sure I have it in me to live out in the wilds of Montana. I love the conveniences of the big cities. The East Coast wouldn’t be terrible. Though winters would be an absolute drag. And isn’t Albany pretty small? It’s upstate, I’m nearly positive. Nothing at all like New York City. Is it similar to Bozeman, then?
“Let’s go get coffee,” Faedra says, lacing her fingers with mine. “You need to get out of here before you drive yourself mad.”