Chapter 3
LOGAN
After last night's bombshell that Savannah was coming home, I did what any alpha would do with shame and guilt hanging over his head.
I took my best bottle of whiskey and decided to drown my sorrows in my room alone.
I didn't even let Griff come in to spend the night.
Fuck! We shared most things as a pack, but they didn't know that I broke Savannah's heart.
I'm the one who caused her to leave Pine Hollow eight years ago. And I want it to stay like that.
The coffee tastes like shit this morning, but then again, everything tastes like shit when you wake up with a hangover.
I stare at my reflection in the black surface of my mug and wonder when exactly my life became a country song about three losers who can't figure out how to function like normal fucking adults.
Griff's takeout containers from last night are still scattered across the counter because apparently cleaning up after himself is beneath his royal fucking highness.
His sandalwood scent carries hints of sawdust and that particular brand of morning arrogance that means he's expecting someone else to deal with his mess while he swans off to build houses for people who actually pay him to give a damn.
"Sleep well?" Griff asks without looking up from his phone, scrolling through whatever social media bullshit contractors waste their time on.
"Like a fucking toddler teething."
Griff snorts. "Ouch! Someone's extra cheerful this morning."
He's not fucking wrong. Savannah. I haven't thought about her in eight years.
One mention from Dax and she's screwing with my fucking mind like she never left.
I'm a control freak. Not that I would ever admit it out loud.
Is it too much to expect Griff to not only eat his goddamn takeout, but maybe clean up the containers afterward?
And for once, maybe cook something that doesn't come in a grease-stained paper bag?
Xavier plates the eggs, while I glare at Griff's mess. Thai food containers, pizza boxes from three days ago, and what looks like the remains of a sandwich that's achieved sentience and started its own ecosystem.
"We need to discuss last night." Xavier adjusts his glasses.
"What about it?" I take another sip of terrible coffee and wonder if it's too early to add whiskey. Probably not, considering what we're about to discuss.
"Savannah. Dax's suggestion about planning the wedding with her."
Griff finally sets his phone down long enough to shovel eggs into his mouth. "You think she'll show up?"
"According to Emma, she's the best wedding planner in Denver." Xavier cuts his eggs into squares because the man can't eat food without organizing it first. "Celebrities, politicians, the works."
Typical Xavier has already done a background check before either Griff or I have even thought to do it. He really is a control freak.
I snort. "Good for her. It doesn't mean she'll come here. She hasn't in eight years."
"We already are involved," Griff points out. "Dax asked us to be at his wedding party."
"Being groomsmen doesn't mean we have a happy reunion with our ex-girlfriend."
"Ex-girlfriends," Xavier corrects. "Plural. She dated all three of us."
"At different fucking times," I snap. "It's not like we were sharing her."
Griff's sandalwood scent shifts, carrying notes of old bitterness. "Might as well have. She had the same effect on all of us."
"Which was?" I ask, because I need to stop this conversation before it goes somewhere I can't handle.
"She's the only omega that has dated all three of us."
Christ, when did we become so pathetic that an omega's attention felt like charity?
"Right, I confess. Stop talking about Savannah already.
" The words burst out of me like a dam breaking.
My chest feels tight, and I set my coffee mug down hard enough to make both of them look up.
"We dated in high school. I planned to get together after graduation, then I got my firefighter exams. I knew what I wanted to be back then. "
Griff stops chewing mid-bite, his warm brown eyes locked on me with uncomfortable intensity. Xavier's clinical mask slips slightly, his fingers tightening on the rim of his own mug, revealing something that might be surprising.
"I told her when I got back from training and the academy, we'd see how we felt. But no restrictions while I was gone, which is when she dated both Griff and Xavier.” The memory tastes bitter, like coffee grounds and regret. "She agreed."
"She dated us," Xavier says quietly, his mint scent carrying confusion.
"Yeah, I didn’t want her sitting at home crying over me."
"Big headed much!" Griff blurts, laughing, but then he stops when he sees the seriousness on my face. His fork clinks against his plate as he sets it down.
I run both hands through my hair, fingers tugging at the roots, feeling the weight of eight years of guilt pressing down on my shoulders. "So when I came back from the academy, she had her arms wide open. I welcomed her back, and with all that experience under my belt, everything was going well."
Griff leans forward in his chair, elbows resting on the table. "Then?"
"She wanted us to move in together. I agreed. Things were good." I stare at my reflection in the black surface of my coffee, seeing a coward staring back. "Until it felt like too much. I was newly qualified, and she was planning our wedding. The stress of it all, the pressure..."
My voice cracks slightly, and I clear my throat, shifting in my seat. Controlled Logan, the one who doesn't break down over ancient history.
"She found places for us to live. Had it all planned out, down to the paint colors and furniture placement. I never showed up to look at them. Told her I needed space."
"And she gave it to you," Xavier says, tilting his head as if studying a puzzle.
"Until I confessed that I didn't know if we were really a scent match." The words taste like ash and broken promises. "Broke up with her right there in Miller's parking lot. Eight years and four months ago."
"That's when she left," Griff says, and it's not a question.
"Exactly. Holding her heart in her hands and tears streaming down her face." I drain my coffee mug because I need something to do with my hands that doesn't involve putting them through the wall. "Got in her car and drove straight out of Pine Hollow. Never look back."
Xavier says, “so you're the reason she left town."
"Yes."
Griff's sandalwood scent carries something that might be understanding, might be disappointment. He leans back slowly, the chair creaking under his weight. "All this time, we thought..."
"That she just got tired of small-town life?" I laugh, but there's no humor in it. "She left because the man she'd been waiting for, planning a future with, told her they weren't compatible after she'd already given him everything."
"Logan..." Xavier starts, but I cut him off with a sharp look.
"So yeah, working with her is going to be fucking complicated. Not because we all dated her, but because I'm the one who broke her heart badly enough to make her leave everything behind."
The kitchen falls silent except for the steady drip of coffee and the low hum of the refrigerator. My own guilt echoes off the walls like a confession I should have made years ago.
"What now?" Griff asks finally, rubbing a hand over the back of his neck.
"Dax doesn't know shit. And it's staying that way." I stand up, the chair legs scraping against the floor, carrying my plate to the sink because routine motions help when everything else feels like it's falling apart. "We're going to help Dax get his perfect wedding."
"Maybe you should talk to her," Xavier suggests with typical clinical optimism, setting his mug down gently. "Explain what happened, apologize..."
"For not being ready for marriage at twenty-two?" I rinse my plate with more force than necessary, water splashing against my hands. "Some mistakes don't get fixed with apologies, Xavier. Some things stay broken."
"But maybe..." Griff starts, his fingers drumming lightly on the table.
"Nothing. She built a life without us, without Pine Hollow, without me. Good for her. She deserves better than what I could give her then, and probably better than what I can give her now."
I turn to face them, seeing my own guilt reflected in their expressions. "So when Christmas Eve comes and she's at Emma's perfect wedding, we smile, we do our jobs, and we remember that some chapters are supposed to stay closed."
My jaw tightens. Seeing Savannah again means facing the biggest regret of my life, and I'm not sure any of us are ready for that conversation.