Chapter 12
FORD
Letting go of Brielle’s hand when we entered the rink was a difficult task, but I get it.
Mixed signals for Connor are something neither of us intend to do.
Walking down the main hall, there are ice rinks on each side. This place also has other sports. Hudson even trains his football team in a field nearby in the summer.
“This place is impressive,” Brielle compliments.
I scratch my thumb over my chin which has some stubble since I didn’t want to waste any time this morning. Elle is taking a chance on us, admitting truths, and letting me back into her life the way I want to be in hers. So yeah, there was no time for shaving.
“Thanks. After the summer when Connor is back at school, I’ll get my head busy with logistics and planning. We have a lot of staff to handle here, so there will be a lot of meetings, I’m sure.”
“But here you are now, volunteering to teach a class for the kids.” She smiles with the praise.
“I would like to think even if I didn’t have a son that I would still have found myself here. And if I don’t like it, then maybe I’ll coach college hockey. There is something about eager athletes that would keep me on my toes.”
“I could see that. The nearest college to Lake Spark is ironically Hollows.”
“I may have noticed.” We walk side by side, our shoulders occasionally grazing. “Connor will be on a break soon, and then you can see him.”
“I guess I need to get used to this. I don’t see Connor giving up hockey any time soon.”
“You resent hockey?”
She bobs her head side to side. “I could say it took you away from me, but hockey is part of your identity and what you enjoy. I knew as soon as I discovered we were having a boy that he would probably want to follow in your footsteps. Don’t get me wrong, I would be thrilled if he said hockey wasn’t for him and he would rather try theater or violin.
I get scared that as he gets older, the game gets more… intense.”
I touch her shoulder to comfort her. “I understand, but right now, he is still a junior and wears lots of padding, and they take it easy. It’s no different to any other sport.”
“Except he is wearing skates on ice, and hockey moms scare me. I need to go full-on grizzly mama bear around hockey moms,” she tells me in a neutral tone.
I laugh at her statement. “You’re the hottest hockey mom there is.”
Brielle shoots me a warning glare. “No flirting here.”
Up ahead I see someone I know and nod my head. “Hey, Declan,” I call out.
Declan is my former teammate; he was new to the team this year, and I took him under my wing.
He is also worth billions, thanks to his family and investments.
He has proven everyone wrong by demonstrating he earned a spot on the team by pure talent, and lucky for them, he still has a few years left to play.
“Hey, Ford.” He walks to me and shakes my hand. His eyes are immediately drawn to Brielle at my side.
Clearing my throat, I set my hand on Brielle’s lower back.
As much as I would consider Declan a friend, I have no problem giving him the stay-the-fuck-away-from-my-woman stare, because his bachelor status doesn’t exactly thrill me, especially since I’m about to hit the ice and leave Brielle alone in the stands.
“You just gave an hour to the kids?”
“Yeah.” Declan’s blue eyes float between us in slight confusion.
I explain, “Brielle is here to check on our son.”
Brielle smiles tightly.
“It’s good to see you again. Connor is a natural talent,” Declan compliments.
“I’ll never get tired of hearing that,” Brielle responds.
“Those kids wore me out. Good luck,” he voices.
I fold my arms over my chest, amused. “It’s worth it. Thanks again for volunteering.”
“Gets me bragging rights on my next date.” He is completely joking because, underneath his steely exterior, I’m sure there is a heart of gold.
I look at my watch and internally groan. “Listen, I would love to hear who the woman of the month is, but I need to grab my skates from my office. Don’t make me regret this but can you walk Brielle to the rink? My sister Violet will meet her there.”
Declan is already offering Brielle his arm. “My pleasure. Happy to volunteer to take care of your precious goods.”
“Oh.” Brielle seems taken aback by his arm offer. “Thank you.” She’s unsure yet entertained, and they both look at me, knowing this scene drives me coconuts.
But alas, it doesn’t take much for my inner caveman to come out when it involves Elle, and everyone knows it.
Hockey was my life. From the moment I tried on my first pair of skates.
There is something about gliding along the ice or the sound of the blade that just brings me peace.
Hockey itself is a game where every second is different.
It’s fast-paced and energizing, yet every move feels like a risk because you don’t know how the puck will slide.
But this group of ten-year-olds are slightly different.
They’re learning more about handling a hockey stick, making goals, and the number of orange cones on the ice are enough to make someone go blind.
Point is, they’re still kids. Brielle is right, though, soon the game will change as Connor gets older.
The group are all sitting on a side bench snacking on oranges and granola bars. It doesn’t take long for me to spot Connor at the end hugging his mom. I skate on over to hear their conversation.
“I’m so happy you’re enjoying your week here. I’ve missed you like crazy.” Brielle touches Connor’s face.
Our son is the perfect mix of Brielle and me.
Connor has Brielle’s hair and eyes, although Brielle swears Connor has my eyes, but his mouth is for sure mine.
His current haircut is a little too short for my liking, but he is only ten.
Brielle always says he is as handsome as can be.
I like to think that my boy will be breaking and mending hearts for years to come.
He shakes her hand away. “You came all the way to Lake Spark to see me?” Connor asks his mom.
Brielle pauses for a second, quickly catching me in her view. “Something like that. I’m getting ready for our little family week together after camp.”
“Did you see my new room?” He seems excited.
“I did. Perfect for my little prince.”
Connor groans. “Don’t say that.”
Brielle plants her hand on her hip. “Getting too big to be my little prince, huh?”
“I was already too big like two years ago.”
I laugh and rustle his hair. “Newsflash, kiddo, there is no age limit for your mom to call you whatever she wants.”
“Great.” He sounds unenthused.
“Where’s your Aunt Violet?” I haven’t seen her yet.
“Had to run to the office. She said she’ll take me to see a PG-13 movie tonight.”
Brielle gives me a pointed look.
I tightly smile. “I’m sure she meant after checking in with us.”
“Are you going to do drills today?”
“Yeah, I am. Remember I’m coach out there on the ice, not Dad.”
Connor bites into his granola bar and speaks with a full mouth. “I know. I mean, every kid here knows already, but fine, we can play along.”
Brielle laughs and checks Connor’s water bottle, her habit from ensuring he has every snack and packed lunch at the ready. “I’ll just be watching in the stands.”
“Nobody else’s family is watching.”
“That’s because nobody else here has a dad who runs this place.”
“Gah, fine. Just don’t embarrass me.”
I place my hand on Connor’s shoulder. “You’re truly a delight today. Remember to be kind to everyone, say thank you, be grateful, and never forget that your dad has the ability to take your game system away,” I remind him.
Connor’s face falls. “I know.”
“I promise I’ll stay quiet. You won’t even know I’m here,” Brielle proclaims as she squeezes Connor’s arm.
“Thanks. I should go back to the group.”
“Of course,” Brielle nods.
The moment Connor has his back turned, I skate closer to the wall so only Brielle can hear. “Breathe. He’s just being a kid.” Brielle does her best to keep her eyes wide open because I can tell she is about to break.
“He’s no longer a little boy. When did that happen? I feel like pre-teen hell is hitting us early,” she mumbles.
“Trust me, he will still have his moments where he needs you. It’ll also be better when he isn’t around other kids,” I promise.
I see my sister walking down the steps of the rink. She smiles, and I wave back. Nobody ever figures out we’re related. She’s petite with black hair and looks nothing like me.
“Hey, Violet,” I call out.
Brielle looks over her shoulder and turns to offer Violet a hug. “Hey.”
“Sorry, I had to run to the office to check that the next snack will arrive at three instead of two.” Violet looks between us. “Got to see Connor?”
“Yeah, he hates that I’m here.” Brielle pouts for dramatics.
Violet touches her arm. “If it’s any consolation, I’m only cool if I supply pizza. I can’t even sway him with watching the Mighty Ducks movies anymore. That was a total win for me. Hockey for Connor and Joshua Jackson.”
Brielle touches Violet’s shoulder in agreement. “Oh yeah, totally forgot he’s in that. So, right, Connor is too old for everything now.”
Ignoring their nostalgia, I tell my sister, “Thanks again for helping out.”
My sister shrugs. “Kind of needed something to do while I figure out my life. Speaking of which, Margo phoned me to ask what kind of flowers you both might like for your wedding?” She gives Brielle and me a confused look.
Brielle croaks out a sound and pretends to cough.
I rub the back of my neck. “What did you say?”
“That I’ll get back to her.” Violet is waiting for further explanation. “Something you two need to share?”
“Do you think she told Mom and Dad?” I ask awkwardly. As much as we are adults, we all know my dad will have an opinion on any reunion between Brielle and me.
Violet looks at Brielle for a clue then back to me. “No. She barely talks to them, and why aren’t you telling me that Margo lost the plot?”
“Yeah, Ford, why aren’t you?” Brielle gives me a cheeky smirk.
Looking at my watch, I pretend it’s time. “Wow, look at that. Need to start warming up.”
Violet looks back and forth between us, tilting her head to study Elle’s vacant finger. “Okay, no engagement ring. Why are you two acting so… oh my God, you two are totally hooking up again,” she loudly whispers, her face completely entertained.
I hold my hand up to indicate for her to quiet down. “You’re my sister. We are not having this conversation.”
“This is why I’m babysitting my favorite little devil, isn’t it? You were really serious about your get-Brielle-to-Lake-Spark plan.”
Brielle swipes a hand through her hair. “Wow, was I really the last one to figure out his agenda?”
My sister gives Brielle raised brows. “Oh please, Connor or no Connor, you really think you both would have lasted more than a day during ‘family time at the lake house?’” Violet uses air quotes.
Brielle attempts to say something but fails.
“Don’t you have emails to check? Maybe fill a water cooler? What am I paying you for again?”
“Big brother can’t handle the hard facts? Fine.” Violet takes two steps then pauses and whirls her finger in the air. “I’m not leaving because you told me to. I’m leaving because I have emails to answer and need to show Declan where he can connect his laptop.”
“Oh yeah, Declan had to answer his phone. He said he’ll call you later,” Brielle informs me.
I shake my head. “Violet, just take Declan to an office. Don’t try anything, Declan knows you are to be treated like a sister.”
“Lucky me. I will show him to your office, but I’m doing it because I have job responsibilities, not because my brother is giving me orders.” She tosses her hair behind her shoulders and stomps up the steps.
Brielle bursts out laughing. “The maturity between you two is really next-level.”
“It’s the fun of having a sibling.” Looking down at my skates, I glide back and forth in place, but when I glance up, I notice a funny look on Brielle’s face. “You okay?”
“Totally.”
“Liar.”
She looks around, checking that nobody notices us. “I like your look. Jeans and skates with a sweater on, it’s my favorite.”
Assessing myself, I’d say that she has good taste. My jaw flexes side to side. “Truth?”
She nods in agreement.
“Have you always been checking me out every time I hit the ice?”
“Maybe,” she plays coy, but it’s obvious.
I lick my lips and grin to myself. “Thought so.” I lean over the wall. “And you are the hot hockey mom I’m always checking out.”
“Thought so,” she repeats my words.
Skating back, I don’t tear my sight away from her until I have to turn to skate forward.
It never gets old, Elle watching me on the ice. In truth, she gave me the drive to play harder and better. Now? She makes me excited for my next chapter on and off the ice.
The kids all pile onto the ice again and skate a few laps. A few times I catch Connor watching his mom sitting in the stands. When the kids come to circle around me, I’m setting down one more cone. We’re going to practice passing the puck side to side.
I notice my son staring at me more intently than normal. I give him a wink, but he rolls back his shoulder.
Fuck me, I wish I could freeze time so he can’t grow anymore.
Sometimes I wonder when he’s older if he will ever puzzle the pieces of Brielle’s and my life together, connecting the dots that we sacrificed a lot for him, but he’ll appreciate that we love him so much which is why we lost time.
Most of all, I wonder if he will look back to now when his parents decided that the puzzle can only be completed if we’re together.
Because that’s what we’re doing.