Chapter 22
brIELLE
Ihand my glass to Lena so she can give me a refill. We’re sitting on my sofa discussing life while enjoying wine and snacks.
“I’ll miss you if you move to Lake Spark,” she tells me for the millionth time.
“It’s not the other side of the earth. Besides, I’m not really sure we can make Lake Spark work because of wherever my career heads.” I swirl the wine around inside my glass.
“Huh.” She seems to be considering my words.
I take a sip of the wine. “What?”
“I know we’re mothers, so we tend to put our kids first, and you are allowed to have something for yourself, but the lawyer thing…” My eyes flutter while I wait for her to finish her sentence. “Is it actually what you want? Or is it what you think you want?”
“Of course it’s what I want,” I protest.
“I’m merely pointing out that sometimes we are so set on an idea that we want to see it through, even when we may have fallen out of love with it. I mean law, not Ford.”
Setting my wine glass on the coffee table, I understand where Lena is coming from. “It was a lot of years of studying to just let it all go. I want to see it through. Does it matter if I change paths later? At least it would be on my own terms.”
Lena grabs the chocolate. “The lawyer title would be your trophy to show everyone you achieved what you set out to do.”
I roll a shoulder to the side. “Maybe. But I also really do want to succeed at it.”
“I think Ford may be the reward. You get to enjoy rewards, trophies you just stare at.” She smirks.
“That’s a solid point. Anyway, I’m happy school has started again, and we can find a routine. This summer was a whirlwind.” I exhale loudly.
“Yet despite your hospital visit and crazy parents, you still have a smile that doesn’t seem to leave you. That’s a great sign.”
“It is, isn’t it? Wish my mind would catch up,” I admit.
“Sometimes I wonder if we really can have it all. If we always need to sacrifice something, you know, juggling motherhood, career, romance. It is possible, as long as you know that if someone were to snap their fingers, you close your eyes, and the first thing that comes to you is what is important. You know that you probably won’t see it all, but one thing.
Tell me, the last few years, if you closed your eyes, what did you see? ”
That’s easy, and instantly a soft smile graces my lips. “Ford and Connor.”
She splays her hands out to the side. “Voila, you have both of them. Life is pretty amazing right now. You just need to focus on that.”
I laugh. “Trust me, I would love to forget that Ford and my father are completely on the outs.”
“Does it get to you what your dad said? Do you believe you follow Ford’s lead?”
My lips roll in then quirk out as I twist the stem of the wine glass between my fingers. “Doesn’t someone always lead in a relationship?”
This time I catch Lena out, as she seems to be contemplating my words. “That normally means someone is waiting. Sounds like you both have been. Besides, Ford threw everything on the table and now he is giving you space and time. Isn’t that what he’s doing?”
I don’t hesitate. “He is.”
“Then tell your father to get a grip.”
“I should,” I admit. “Especially since I think everything is clearer to me. Life is filled with mixed moments. This summer has been amazing when it comes to Ford and me. Meh on the other stuff. But it’s okay, the incredible stuff is what matters.”
She taps my glass with her own. “Great. Then don’t let anything else get you down, and if it does, then know it’s most likely fixable.”
It is.
My mother busies herself in the kitchen of my childhood home while I sit across from my father in the living room.
“I’ll be quick. As long as you don’t disrespect Ford in front of Connor, you can continue to see Connor.
But if you can’t support my relationship with Ford, then I think it’s best we don’t communicate for a while. ”
My father brings one knee over the other. “He’s now come between us.”
“You haven’t given me much choice. Clearly, you can’t see how happy he makes me.”
“You’ve been miserable for years because of him,” he points out.
I shake my head once. “I’ve been miserable because I thought we weren’t possible. We are, and I’m not going to keep repeating how the last years have played out. I get my chance at absolute happiness, and I’m not letting it go.”
“It may seem that way—”
“Stop.” I hold my hand up. “You either support us or not. I won’t go in circles. I’m not a girl confused and trying to figure out how to care for a baby. I’m a woman now who will stand up for anything that gets in the way of what will make my life good.”
My father leans back and scratches his chin. “He phoned me, you know.”
“Ford?”
“Made it clear that I should accept you two. No matter what I think, either way he intends to make you his bride one day and will enjoy flaunting that.”
I attempt to smother a smile because that sounds like him. “As much as I love him for doing that, I’m here to tell you that you should accept everything because I made the decision that it’s what I want.”
He seems to be slightly calmer.
“It’s kind of a pain in the ass having two men in my life so hot-headed,” I add. If there was ever a chance for lightheartedness in this moment, then it’s now.
“Ford and I are not the same,” he interjects.
Okay, that was a failed attempt to find middle ground.
“We were all fine until Ford and I changed our status. All I’m asking is we get back on the same damn train.” I’m now agitated that we’re going in a circle.
“You seem miserable,” he notes.
“There is plenty that has gone wrong this summer, but Ford Spears is not the reason. The best moments lately have been because of him.”
“It’s not just this summer.”
I swallow, well aware that I’m not going to drag this afternoon on. “What if I told you I heard what you were saying? But I’ve made peace with how everything played out. I have a future ahead of me, and that’s what I will focus on.”
“Brielle.” His tone is still too stern for me.
I stand up. “Reach out when you’re ready, because I am,” I add right before I storm out, frustrated yet knowing that I won’t let this situation alter my life.
By the time I’m in the car, I managed to get several grumbles out. Now sitting in the car, I reflect on the last few minutes, and surprisingly, I feel… free.
I’m grateful to my parents for their help, but I’m not indebted. I can make my own decisions, like any woman who knows exactly what they want.
Which is why I grab my phone and call Ford.
He answers on the second ring. I don’t even let him say anything.
“You know I researched it and apparently raccoons are an omen.”
“And?” His voice is gruff, full of interest.
“I found it’s the sign you should be more aware of what’s around you or you should be adaptable. It feels like life right now. Anyway, I think those are good omens.” My voice is slightly whimsical, I must admit.
I can hear Ford’s breath. “Sounds like good omens to have.”
“I believe so.”
“Where are you?”
“Outside my dad’s house.”
I hear him wince. “Yikes.”
“It’s okay. He’s very much looking forward to your chat about making me your future bride,” I tease him.
“Elle, you know I like to make a claim.” His voice sounds equally cunning and possessive.
“Don’t worry, I don’t think any conversation will be happening any time soon, and I’m okay with that.”
We hold through a brief silence.
“Everything will be all right,” he promises.
I tap my steering wheel. “I’m beginning to see that.”