Chapter 20 #2
I break my wrists away from his hand that had them pinned and find the zipper of his jeans, urging him to undo them, and the desperation inside of me to touch his bare cock is overwhelming.
He slides them off in record time and then I receive my wish, with my hand wrapping around his long length, enjoying his gasp that vibrates against our open mouths that touch.
Taking charge, I urge him to his back and crawl on top of him.
I plunge down onto his cock with pure abandon, closing my eyes and focusing only on the feeling of being full. I move up and down, finding the right angle that hits the spot I like.
My hair falls over my shoulders as I tip my head back and close my eyes. I don’t dare dip my gaze down to see Connor. It would make it far too intense.
Too real.
And I need an escape.
But I ignore my internal warning because fire builds below my navel, and I feel like I’m at the edge of a cliff. Glancing down, I’m met with a pair of protective eyes that sends a flame up to my heart.
Connor watches with pure admiration as I fuck him. As if I’m a queen.
He has patience because I know it’s a struggle for him to let me lead when we’re intimate like this. I don’t mind, I like it like that, it’s kind of a turn-on. But right now, I need the control.
I slide up and down, dragging from his base to the tip, knowing it gives him pleasure as much as it does for me. At first, I thought that I needed slow, but I have frustration swirling in me, which is why I need to work out some stress, and I pick up the pace.
Connor uses his upper body strength to sit up, which allows me to wrap my arms around his neck, drawing his mouth back to mine while I swivel my hips and tighten around his length, every thrust more charged than the one before.
My breath turns to a near pant, and his answer is to cover my mouth with his, as if he will give me air, but it only causes the passion between us to intensify.
We move together, with my breasts pressed against his chest and his arms tightly wound around my middle, bringing his length deeper inside of me. His own breathing turns heavy as he follows my cues and meets me on every thrust.
A shade of contentment hits me, because in this moment, my mind goes blank, and my body feels alive.
I quickly spiral into temporary relief when I convulse around him, not even noticing that he chases his own release to the end.
My body goes weak, but he has me. He stays inside while his hand rubs soothing circles on my back, and he kisses the curve of my shoulder.
Connor doesn’t say anything, he just holds me because my body is spent and filled.
I lose track of time, but he eventually kisses along my jaw before gently flipping me so I’m on my back and he can pull out. Connor grabs the duvet and brings it over my body while he leans on his side to observe me again. However, I only feel his eyes on me, since I stare at the ceiling.
His finger, like a feather, traces the lines of my shoulder to the base of my neck. “I’m not leaving you.”
“You’ve mentioned.”
“I’ll make sure nobody bothers you today if that’s what you want.”
I turn my head to the side to look at him. “You mean my father?”
His lips purse out. “He wants to see you.”
A scornful yet humorous smirk curls on my lips. “I forgot that you two are close now.”
Connor’s head falls, and he rubs the back of his neck. “I did what I thought was right.”
A long silence overtakes us.
“You and me? I’m cautious still. I’m here and not running away, but that doesn’t mean I can forget. That’s where you and I are,” I clarify.
He drags his thumb across my bottom lip before his fingers dive through my hair to the back of my head to bring me to his lips for a confirming kiss. “I’ll take it.”
A short while later, I’m dressed in a hoodie and yoga pants when I stall at the entrance to the kitchen to find my father sitting at the kitchen counter.
He attempts to offer me a gentle comforting half-smile, and he holds his hands up in surrender. “I come in peace. Connor let me in. He ran to the store.”
My husband clearly isn’t following my instructions for the day. I walk to the coffee machine, but I give up because I doubt that I will be able to taste much due to the irrational amount of crying that has transpired today.
“I needed to see that you’re okay,” he laments.
I lean against the counter and feel defeated. “I’m alive.”
A long breath leaves his lips. “This doesn’t change anything. You’ll always be my daughter. I was the one who watched you grow, raised you, and love you more than you can even measure.”
The sting in my eyes returns, which informs me that tears are coming. “You and I have always been close. Why didn’t you just… tell me?” I feel so hopeless.
“I promised my brother Camden. It was his dying wish that I raise you as my own, and that meant never telling you. He thought losing another parent since your biological mother was never in the picture was the right move. We’re not identical twins, which might explain why we don’t have the same blood type.
” His head gently lolls to the side. “I owed him his wish, and it was the best gift I ever got… just don’t tell your brother that,” he says, attempting to make me smile.
“I don’t want anything to change between us.
I’m still your dad.” I notice it now, how his eyes look as though he hasn’t slept in days.
“How do we move on?” I barely whisper.
“Whatever way you want. Either way, you’re just as much my daughter now as you were before you found out,” he promises.
It makes me break into a sob, mostly because I hear how much it’s true. This man loves fearlessly, and I’ve always been lucky to be his little girl. I just can’t figure out if my identity is now different.
I wipe away a tear with the back of my hand and sniffle. “I believe you, but I just need to process.”
“I get that. I’ll follow your lead, but I’m not going anywhere.”
I can’t help it, the corner of my mouth tugs with a need to smile through my tears and aching cheeks. “Damn, you and Connor are too alike. I keep hearing that sentence.”
My dad smirks to himself. “He’s a good guy.”
My eyes nearly bug out. “Did you just say that?”
He scoffs and a droll smile forms. “After you both got married, and he told me he knew, I was scared. Took me off guard, but then he promised that you wouldn’t get hurt, and it turns out we’re on the same team.
Then when you arrived for the photos for that article, we both looked at you, so beautiful, and it was apparent that he will take care of you the way I would expect. ”
I would say that it doesn’t make sense, considering Connor hated me then, but it turns out he never hated me at all. He’s been harboring his feelings for me, and everyone could see except me.
My dad continues, “I attempted to give him a lecture when he informed me that he knew, but no shit, your husband literally told me, ‘Don’t bother with the lecture, Spencer. I have every intention of ensuring she’s well taken care of and has a happy life.
I’ll do whatever it takes. Hadley’s heart is mine, so get used to it. ’”
I chortle because that sounds like him. “Always assumed you weren’t his biggest fan.”
“I don’t like hockey players. There’s a difference.”
“News flash, that’s his career.” I appreciate that our conversation moves in a comforting way, as though we may be all right, even if we’re not there yet.
My dad scratches his cheek. “He’s one of the good ones. Connor kept the secret for far too long to protect you, so he is as good as gold to me. Because he sees exactly what I do. You adore your family, and we adore you. We thought it was the right thing to do.”
I notice that my tears have subsided and I’m at last blinking normally. “Time will tell if it is.”
The sound of Connor coming in through the garage door brings our attention to him. He walks in carrying a tray of coffees and a bag of what is probably pastries. Connor’s eyes bounce between my dad and me, unsure of the scene.
Connor clears his throat. “Hey.” It’s an awkward greeting, probably because he knows he conspired.
I give him a pointed look. “Ambushing me?” I indicate to my father.
Connor sets the tray down and his face stays neutral. “He wanted to talk to you, and I thought it would maybe help.”
My father stands up. “I think we’ve talked enough today, as I know it’s a lot to take in. I’ll leave you two alone.” He walks to me and brings his arm out, hoping for a hug, but I don’t move and his arm falls, his face disappointed. “I’ll check in again tomorrow. I love you, Hadley.”
I nod that I heard him and watch him leave, touching Connor’s shoulder in passing. My heart cracking but not broken.
Connor steps in my direction with that look that is pure confidence. “You’re not angry with me. Even if you don’t want to admit it, you needed to hear from Spencer.”
It wasn’t horrible, better than last night, just… it’s raw.
I grumble a sound before I begin to stomp out of the kitchen. “Space and time, Con. That’s the only way we’ll all come out of this,” I declare.