Chapter 20
ISLA
Sleep is a glorious thing.
If only I could enjoy a nice deep slumber. Lately, I cannot, which is why I drowsily wake up at to the sound of someone quietly clicking their tongue.
My eyes dart to the baby nest in the middle of the bed to find it empty, which causes me to shoot up in a panic, but then I ease at the sight. One that I’ve become accustomed to the last week since we came home.
Vaughn is bouncing Nora in his arms while he stands near the window, greeting the day. He offers her his pinky as he makes little noises. His lack of shirt isn’t helping the situation.
The view warms my heart.
Vaughn must sense that I’m up, as he doesn’t take his eyes off our daughter but acknowledges that I’m here. “Your mommy should go back to sleep.”
I laugh. “Very unlikely.” The heavy fullness with a twinge of pain across my chest informs me that something has to give. “Mommy either needs to pump or go straight to the source. Someone may be hungry soon.”
It causes Vaughn to glance in my direction. “Again? Didn’t you feed her like a gazillion times during the night?”
Sliding out from under the covers, I grab my robe lying on the end of the bed. “That’s kind of how babies work. At first, they need a lot of milk.”
A humorous smirk hits his lips. “True. She is also a strong one, this one.”
“You sound like she’s going to be some future queen of a kingdom.”
He chuckles. “Nah, she’ll just be keeping us on our toes as soon as puberty hits.”
I walk to them, admiring how this is a strange yet relaxed feeling. We share a bed, all three of us, as if it was the only way to be.
I’m happy Vaughn gets his moments with Nora, especially as he has a lot of work. Having a baby in the off-season should be a hockey player’s dream, but a general manager? Hell no, it’s full-on preparing for the season ahead.
My hand falls onto Vaughn’s arm as we look down at our daughter. “She’s already getting bigger.” Still her baby clothes drown her a little, and we have to roll up her sleeves.
“Everything is a blur. Fast is an understatement,” he notes.
We haven’t discussed even once our events prior to Nora entering the world. How could we? We’re occupied with a new baby.
“I’m going to head to the training arena soon, but I’ll be home early because my brother is going to stop by to meet his niece,” Vaughn informs me.
It grabs my attention, as I haven’t met his brother yet. I guess it’s not a big deal considering he is Nora’s uncle. No different than Briggs, except meeting Vaughn’s brother feels a bit more confronting and serious maybe. I want to make a good impression.
“Sounds good. I’m going to see Hadley this morning, and maybe I’ll stop at the general store for some things later.” Our local general store is anything but, it’s a gourmet supermarket.
“Sure, just take it easy.” He hands me Nora. I’m fairly confident that she has his eyes.
Nora is making little faces that tell me she’s hungry. “I’m just going to head downstairs to feed her.” As much as I don’t mind Vaughn watching me, it still causes my lips to curl into an awkward smile. It’s a sort of intimacy in a different strange way.
“Okay, I’ll be down in a minute.”
A few minutes later, I’m sitting on the couch with Nora at my chest and my eyes taking in the morning light streaming in through the big windows. I’m chewing on some fruit since I always wake up hungry.
Random sounds in the kitchen tell me that Vaughn is about to leave and probably grabbing his protein shake for the road.
We have a routine that we easily fell into. I’m grateful for that. If he was still angry at me for not telling him about my pregnancy or insistent that everything goes his way, then I would have been walking on eggshells.
“You’ll send me photos throughout the day?” He smiles at me as he’s on his way to the front door.
“Always,” I promise.
He pauses for a second the way he or I do on a daily basis. I’m sure we both want to say something that has no relation to our daughter, but we always stop ourselves. We just let our eyes linger instead.
“Isla, uh…”
A closed-mouth smile hits me. “I know,” I acknowledge, but I really don’t. It’s just a confirmation that we’re both in the same state.
For now, that just has to work.
Hadley hands me a decaf coffee and a croissant as we get comfortable on the bench by the gazebo in the park, with the lake nearby. Nora is sleeping in her stroller. Getting fresh air is important for me, especially with the great summer weather we’ve been having.
“Sleep tight. I’m your auntie who will be your godmother and be the one you can turn to when your mom goes strict during the teenage years. I’ll fill you up with sugar when you’re going through the terrible twos and be the best friend your mom deserves,” Hadley coos and jokes.
I hold up my coffee. “Funny. Thanks for the croissant, I’m always hungry these days. Nobody warned me how feeding a pint-sized human makes you starving. I think it’s worse than labor. I just want to eat and eat,” I complain.
“At least you have an excuse. Don’t you burn extra calories or something?”
My head tips slightly to the side. “Good point. But I’m jealous of your caffeine-infused drink.”
She slides next to me to nudge my shoulder. “One day you’ll taste it again. Speaking of tasting…” Her tone changes, and she gives me playful look. “Vaughn.” Her eyes nearly pop out.
I just roll my own. “It’s nothing. We’re so occupied and running on adrenaline still.”
“I can see that. Just… won’t that wear off at some point?”
I snicker a sound. “I think we both realize that.”
“How are you around one another?”
My face squinches, as I know one of her signature squeals is about to hit me. “So the thing is, we’re sharing a bed. Don’t get excited, we have Nora between us, and her parents are grasping for straws when it comes to sleep. Except… before I went into labor, we kind of did something stupid.”
“No way!” Now Hadley is fueled by the latest gossip of my life.
“Simmer down, child. It happens. I’m fairly convinced it set off my labor too.” I’m only half-joking, but it’s a better story.
“Are you kidding me? Don’t you two ever lock it up? Every time you see one another you just go at it.”
I glance blankly to my side to face her. “Attraction is attraction, but we haven’t once mentioned that night since.”
Hadley brings a finger to her chin. “One day it will come up, and then what?”
“I don’t know. Our priority is this little princess right here.
I’m also in this cloud of happiness where everything is lullabies and cute little outfits.
A clear mind doesn’t exist for me right now.
Maybe I’m also waiting to see what the impact will be once Vaughn starts traveling with the team.
” I slouch because the thought isn’t exactly uplifting.
She affectionately touches my shoulder. “Do you still worry that he might bail on you?”
I shrug and don’t dare say the word yes.
“I really don’t think he will,” she encourages. “He’s totally in love with Nora.”
My lips quirk out. “See? With Nora. When it comes to me, then it’s still confusing for both of us.”
“Maybe time is what you need. But maybe you should also plant some seeds in his head of what you’re thinking. Men do great when we give hints.”
I yawn from tiredness while I take in her advice. “You’re probably right, but that’s not going to happen today. His brother is stopping by, and I want to give Nora a bath tonight, plus catch up on laundry.”
“Excuses.” She gives me a knowing look.
I lick my lips. “I can guarantee you that Vaughn is probably doing the same as me.”
“Then it’s easy. Be the one to make the first step. He did it after he found out and made you move in with him, and I think you kind of enjoy that demanding side of him.” Her voice raises slightly. “It’s now your turn.”
A deep breath is my answer. “You’re probably right.”
Stone has darker hair than his little brother.
He’s also extremely kind to me, which is a surprise.
I kind of expected him to be wary, considering I never informed Vaughn he was going to be a dad.
Instead, Stone showed up with flowers for me and a giant stuffed monkey and a few wooden toys for when Nora is older.
He's holding her now as we sit outside on the patio with snacks on the table.
“For sure she has my brother’s eyes,” he states.
I smile. “Thought so.” I side-eye Vaughn, confirming that I’m right.
“Geez, the jury has spoken.” Vaughn grins.
“What are you going to do when Vaughn starts traveling?” Stone wonders.
Vaughn and I look at one another because we still have so much to talk about.
“I still have maternity leave for a little while, then hopefully I can find a part-time nanny or something. Daycare seems a bit too early for Nora. Plus, a friend’s mother said she could watch Nora one day a week, and I trust her with my life,” I explain.
“We have options. Money isn’t an issue,” Vaughn adds. No, it’s not. Vaughn won’t let me pay for anything, and it’s frustrating at times.
Stone looks down at Nora as she waves her arms. “I’m not a babysitter, unless it gets me the attention of the ladies in this town,” he jokes. “But I’m in the process of moving to Lake Spark soon for more inspiration.”
“I still can’t believe you’re going to write a book,” I say.
“Well, nobody is supposed to know. It’s not every day you expect some retired hockey jock to write.”
“A smart one at that,” Vaughn adds.
“Anyway, I also have a writing retreat happening here soon. My publisher is sending some romance writer to this retreat, and I’m confident she doesn’t even write her own stories. I’m not at all looking forward to it, so I may need to escape to this house.”
I laugh and grab some crackers. “She’s your best chance at any excitement. Pretty much all the women in this town are taken.”
“I feared you would say that. It’s breaking my heart,” he says, playing along.
Vaughn rubs his face due to his brother’s humor. “Or you could just deadbolt her in.”
“Oh, like you two did.” Stone glances down at Nora then back up to us.
Vaughn and I both awkwardly look at one another.
“Cheese plate?” Vaughn offers to his brother to divert the conversation.
“Nope, I’m good. What I meant to say is I’m happy to check in when my brother is out handling the attitudes of his hockey players. But what’s the deal going forward? Just going to live together under one roof?” Stone isn’t afraid to be bold.
Vaughn gives his brother a warning glare. “Stone, maybe focus on the kid.”
“Yikes. Did I just trigger a conversation between you two later? My bad.” Stone isn’t the least bit sorry.
Clearing my throat, I decide to keep us moving. “You two are close. Kind of like me and my brother.”
“Yep, which is why I watch out for him.” For the first time since he arrived, Stone looks at me seriously.
“Christ, Stone, chill it for a bit.” Vaughn’s eyes shoot another caution to his brother.
I smile shyly and adjust my shirt. “I get it, I would do the same.”
A silence around us breezes in.
"She's the chillest baby. Doesn't really cry much and always seems calm," Vaughn attempts to break the quiet, and his brother just smiles softly.
Taking this opportunity, I decide to escape this confronting day. “I think it’s Nora’s feeding time, she must be getting hungry.” I stand to take her out of Stone’s arms.
“Is that why her little fingers are getting grabby at my chest.”
“Exactly. It’ll give you some time alone with Vaughn.”
“You probably won’t see him when you come back down,” Vaughn mentions. “Either my brother hits the road or I’ll be throwing him in the lake.”
I grin. “Probably go with option one.”
Walking away and closing the sliding door behind me, I still manage to hear the beginning of their conversation.
“Isla seems like a great mom, I don’t think you need to worry,” Stone tells his brother.
“When it comes to that, I never did,” Vaughn replies.
The smile forming on my lips is as natural as can be.
A while later, I return down the stairs and into the kitchen where Vaughn is placing snacks back into their containers. I stop his arm so I can grab another nibble of the cheese cubes.
“Sorry, I’m like a famished monster.” I hold the cube up.
His lips tilt up. “I’ve noticed.”
He continues his quest to clean up, and then we’re stuck in a long gaze.
Blowing a breath through my pursed lips, I go for it. “Look, I think we are both aware that the underlying tension—”
“Attraction,” he corrects me.
Now my own grin begins to form. “Attraction,” I repeat. “It’s bringing a debate inside our heads. As much as I want to discuss the…” My finger twirls in the air. “What…” It drags out.
Vaughn smirks before he stands closer to me with purpose and confidence. “The not-parent part of our equation is what you’re trying to say.”
I suppress my laugh and instead smile tightly. “Yep, that. I just can’t think clearly right now. I’m adjusting to this mother thing, and I literally get excited when she blinks.”
“I get it, me too.” He steps closer, and my heart rate picks up.
“Can we maybe just wait a bit to talk about everything? You know, the living situation, childcare, your traveling, my work, when to start solid foods, or should it be eggs or toaster waffles for breakfast,” I ramble. “Everything.”
Vaughn is so ridiculously amused. His finger hooks under my chin to tip my face up so I have no escape. “The thing between us is what you’re trying to say.” He drags his thumb across my bottom lip.
“Uh-huh.” I do my best to look away, but my eyes only find his as my destination.
“You’re cute when you’re flustered.” His eyes are lust-filled, I see it.
“For heaven’s sakes, Vaughn.” I’m only half annoyed. “Can you keep us on track?”
He chuckles, with zero issue that his sultry gaze is sending us down a hole. “Relax, I’m well aware that you need to recover for a few weeks, and we need to establish boundaries. But can’t I enjoy looking at you?”
“No. Nope. Uh-uh,” I clearly state. “We have a child sleeping between us, and she’s now officially our barrier between crossing borders.”
“We suck at limits.” His sexy look falls to a hopeless one.
“Yeah, exactly why we should take some time to clear out our adrenaline of our life change and then address stuff.” My hands pretend to shovel the air, him included.
Vaughn removes his finger from under my chin, and the excitement from his touch lessens slightly because it can now be tamed.
He kisses my forehead. “Agreed but not forgotten,” he promises before he walks away.