Chapter 22
ISLA
Standing at the front door, I take the cow that plays nursery rhymes in one continuous loop and throw it outside. However, the toy nearly hits Vaughn as he walks up the front path. He even ducks and looks at me preciously.
“What did the cow do to you?” His lips slant to the side, entertained.
I growl a sound as I hold a wooden spoon in my other hand as if I’m a crazed woman. “I was playing with Nora, and that stupid thing wouldn’t stop playing ‘Merry Had a Little Lamb.’ Even the off button won’t solve the problem, and the batteries won’t come out.”
Vaughn continues his approach to me. “And the wooden spoon?”
“I thought maybe if I hit it enough that it would stop, but it’s possessed and out to give me a headache.” I realize how ridiculous I must sound.
He takes the spoon from my hand before we both assess the damage of a plastic singing cow lying in the plants, although miraculously now quiet.
“Let me guess, Connor and Hadley gave us that gift,” he comments.
“Or Stone. We have options. Yeah, it’s all of their life’s mission to give our child annoying toys.” I’m still a little salty that a toy put me in a foul mood.
Following Vaughn into the house and closing the door behind me, I’m happy he’s back. He came home early, as he said he would try.
The last month has been hectic. Nora grows, Vaughn has meetings, and I’m trying to keep on top of laundry.
Vaughn heads straight to our princess in her bouncy chair.
“Hey, sunshine, is Mommy acting a little strange today?” He tickles her belly, and Nora’s response is a bubble popping out of her mouth.
Vaughn glances back at me with his eyes wide before returning his focus on our daughter.
“Your mom says it’s because of a poor cow, but I think it’s because tonight is the night that you are getting evicted and trying out your big room. ”
That is why I’m not in the best of moods today.
I grumble a sound, as if he isn’t right, even though he is. Vaughn stands and heads back in my direction, and despite being sleep deprived, he still has swagger.
“We agreed that it’s for the best. If she continues to sleep near us, then she may never sleep alone for the years to come. Hell, she may even sleep better.”
An upset feeling swirls inside of me. “I know, especially with her feeding schedule slightly better and also having a bit of formula. A better night of sleep for all does sound appealing.” I hold my palm up. “But she’s a baby, my baby.”
Vaughn gently touches my elbows. “Our baby, and this is what we both agreed. Plus, you said you tried putting her in her room a few times for her naps during the day and she loved it, slept totally fine.”
I stay silent and awkwardly tighten my lips.
He cocks his head to the side. “You did let her nap in there a few times, right?”
My eyes flutter. “I may have… tried… but she generally sleeps in her stroller or in the baby wrap attached to me like a koala.”
He gently shakes his head, with his sexy grin staying put. “Okay, now I understand why this might be a big step. Look, it’s up to you, but I think you want a little bit of routine, and this way it will be easier to have babysitters.”
I sigh and growl. “You’re right.”
And two hours later, we find ourselves staring at Nora’s closed nursery door, with her already sound asleep on the other side. Vaughn is holding the baby monitor like a walkie-talkie, and I’m checking to ensure the app is correctly installed on my phone so I can check on the video feed at any time.
Vaughn and I glance at each other, clearly more affected then either of us care to admit. “She has her dreamcatcher, she’s safe.”
I give him a dumbfounded look. “Oh, now you want to believe in my superstition.”
My feet begin to nearly stomp away in the direction of my room, but the clearing of a throat behind me draws my attention back to Vaughn.
“Where are you going?”
“My room,” I inform him like he’s crazy.
“Why?”
“Why not? Nora is now in her own bed, and I need to get used to waking in the night and going to her room if she wakes,” I explain, as though he has forgotten our plan.
Vaughn steps closer to me, our breaths now mingling as the tips of his fingers brush down my arm to my wrists. “You’re not leaving my room.”
Oh… oh.
I nervously chortle. “There is no longer a baby lying between us. The baby vacates your room, then that kind of means so do I. I was there because of the baby.”
The pads of his fingertips draw back up my arms, causing a quiver in my body. “Do you really want to move back into your old room? In the end, you were only there a few nights,” he whispers as our eyes latch onto a moment.
No words form from my side.
We’ve carefully treaded around the topic of Nora moving to her own room. As in, we’ve purposely avoided the puzzle of where I might sleep. But leave it to Vaughn to take the step.
My head retreats back slightly, attempting to wrap my thoughts around what he is trying to translate.
“Isla, you’re not moving back to your old room.” His voice is nearly taunting but so damn delicious and amorous.
“Am I not?” I play clueless… but really, I kind of am. What is happening?
Vaughn brings his finger to my cheek before skimming the line of my jaw in a tantalizing move, with his eyes firmly open. “No. You don’t want to go, and you don’t need to.”
I snicker at this turn of events. “Vaugh, I’m not sure—”
His finger lands on my lips to shush me. “You’re staying in my room.” He is so damn inflexible.
I blow his finger away, determined to challenge him, except I can’t. “Horrible idea.” I smile.
“All the more reason to do it.” He grins.
My finger points to him. “We’re sleeping,” I warn.
“I’m a gentleman,” he counters.
I laugh once as I turn away from him to walk to the devil’s den. “Hardly.”
This is what continues to happen around him. He gets cocky, and a powerful force within me eagerly follows.
It’s a few minutes later when I’m lying on my side in Vaughn’s bed, staring at him as he is in the same position, that I know this is the beginning of a road that may lead to a destination that I’m not quite sure of.
Luckily, I’m not sure I’m ready to open business down below yet.
The doctor gave the all-clear a few weeks ago, but mentally, I’m just not there.
I believe Vaughn is aware, which is why it confuses me even more that his look is soft.
He wants me here, in his bed, only to sleep, without our daughter present.
My head rests on my hands under my cheek. “Our wall is gone.”
“Kind of the point.” Vaughn brings his hand to my hair to stroke once in a comforting kind of way.
“What are we doing, Vaughn?” I hate this elatedness that must be showing on my face.
His eyes are tense yet delicate, and it feels as though he is admiring me in this moment. “Nothing. I just think it’s ridiculous for you to sleep in your own room.”
“Really?” I’m doubting him.
“Nah, I would have you thrown over my lap in no time to spank you if I could. However, we accidentally made a child who is amazing, which means we have to skirt the lines of caution. Which we can do in bed… to sleep.”
I giggle at his word choice. “Hmm, we could end up in murky waters.”
“Or it could be the start of the conversation that we’ve been avoiding.”
I nuzzle into his palm near my ear. “It’s kind of, I don’t know… We’re good at the physical stuff, and we have a connection, but we’ve never actually, you know… dated.”
Vaughn sits up in a flash, as though I hit a nerve, but I’m confused why his soft look is anything but scared. “You’re right. I didn’t really think about it like that.”
Now I join him when I slide my upper body up to lean against the headboard.
“It’s because you were never one to date, I think.
Not for anyone. Our ability to connect so easily was also due to distance.
We never had to confront the explanation of what we were doing.
It was easy to just be… friends with benefits?
” My voice sounds uneven, as I’m not sure my word choice is correct.
“A good way to examine it. However, all of that went out the window when you got pregnant. Kind of bound for life now.”
Glancing at the monitor on the side table, I see that Nora is still sound asleep.
She’s also the reminder of a simple fact, which makes me whip my head right back in Vaughn’s direction.
“I don’t think forcing something because we share a child is the right approach.
” As much as I want everything for our daughter, Nora seeing her parents together because they felt an obligation isn’t the best solution either.
A tickle down by fingers resting on the duvet causes my sight to take in the view of Vaughn interlacing our fingers in a way that feels far too natural.
“We agree on a lot of things, Isla. Which is why I wouldn’t even be attempting to try anything if I felt it was just for Nora’s sake. But it is because of her that we both get to reassess things. You’re right, distance made it easier before. Now it just gives us a reason to confront it.”
I can’t read him right now, but my face tips up in caution. “Did you just say you’re attempting something?”
Vaughn’s lips roll in before popping out. “You know the thoughts in our head that we’ve both acknowledged yet haven’t said out loud? It’s something like that.” The man is almost bashful, I’m not sure I’ve seen this side of him.
This time, I interlink our fingers. “So, I guess this is the beginning of us attempting to address the elephant in the room.”
“Maybe. But the elephant is right there.” He indicates with his head behind me.
Quickly I look then laugh when I see a stuffed animal on the floor.
“Smartass.” I turn to Vaughn and playfully swat his arm. It only triggers us to enter a scuffle of tickling, that ends with me nearly squealing in delight, right before he pins me to the mattress, dragging my arms up over my head. Our laughter fades but our tilted smirks stay put.
It would be so easy if he leaned down to kiss me, yet the dimples on his cheeks tell me that he is about to impress me instead.
“What you said earlier, about how we never dated.”
“Mmmhmm.” I wait patiently for him to continue.
He looks up then back to my lips. “Let me change that. We’ll go on a date.”
I nearly bug out in a wonderful way. “You didn’t exactly ask, you just stated.” We have banter, and it’s great.
“Now who’s being clever? Besides, I already know your answer, so I’m saving you the consideration in your head.” He doesn’t let my pinned arms go.
My body curves up to him, and it’s far more sensual than what I intended. We should just end our misery of feeding into our magnetism but neither one of us dares to.
“Are you going to let my wrists go so I can sleep?” I raise my brows.
He releases me. “For now, yes.”
That earns him my back, because I need to roll away from him to avoid his sweltering stare, and my body feels alive in the way that’s eager for me to ignore that my first time since becoming a mom will be different.
Then again, it will be different with Vaughn, because we are on the other side of a life change.
The feeling of a warm body swooping in behind me doesn’t surprise me. However, Vaughn’s cuddly nature kind of does.
I’ve seen him with Nora, but that’s fatherhood. When we all shared a bed, sure, I would tuck my body against Vaughn’s while one of us held our baby. But now?
I snort a laugh. “We suck at boundaries. Our new motto.”
“Totally right, but that’s why we can knock them down,” he confirms but only wraps his arms tighter around me.
A few days later, I’m taking note of when Nora’s next check-up is with the doctor on the shared calendar with Vaughn, when I notice that in two weeks, he will be away for pre-season games. I focus on that a little longer than I should because the thought is a little daunting.
Vaughn arrives home just as I connect my cell to my charger.
“Get dressed,” he insists.
I give myself the once-over, and I’m in my usual skinny jeans and tank top. “What’s wrong with this?”
He leans against the counter like a man who doesn’t know anything else but swaggered stances. “Relax, it wasn’t an insult. We both need to change, as we’re going out.”
“Oh, I should probably go pack the diaper bag.” I’m about to go to my task when Vaughn grabs my wrist in record time.
He has a grimace which is slightly unnerving. “She isn’t coming with.”
“Huh?”
“You know, normally you don’t bring kids on your first date.” He watches me while everything registers. An unrecognizable sound rumbles at the back of my throat. “Remember? Date. You and me,” he clarifies.
Before I can answer, the doorbell rings, and I decide answering it is the distraction I need. Only, I answer to find Connor. Now I’m confused again.
Vaughn arrives behind me to greet our guest. “Nice, the babysitter is here.”
My head whizzes straight to Vaughn. “What?” I nearly spit out with great disapproval on the babysitter choice.
Connor strides in and raises his hands up. “Relax. We all know that I’m not capable of handling itty-bitty humans.”
“Oh really?” I’m cynical. “Had you pegged as babysitter of the year.”
“Yikes, someone is frosty today,” Connor highlights to Vaughn.
He just grins at his friend before placing his hands on my shoulders from the side. “Ignore her. I caught her off guard with the date-night surprise. Perhaps now is the time to tell her the plan regarding our daughter.”
Connor stands before me, casual as can be. “Yeah, sure.” He throws a thumb over his shoulder. “Hadley and my mom are in my car trying to install the car seat, they’re responsible tonight for your little result of procreation.”
Relief hits me in whoosh. No way would I have left my little girl with Connor alone.
“Great. That’s clarified.” Vaughn is guiding me toward the stairs. “Now go get ready, Isla. You have twenty minutes,” he calls out, slightly coaxing me up the stairs.
By the time I’m searching for clothes in my closet and settle on a black dress that will fit and do wonders, then it nearly overthrows my balance; I’m going on a real date with Vaughn.