Chapter 9 #2
Her lungs found air, and she blinked up at a frowning Grayson. “I’m good.” She forced the lie from her mouth and tried not to look at the table. Her mind scrambled for an exit. “Sorry, I just…” She waved her free hand, absently noting its slight tremor. “I just need to use the restroom.”
Grayson’s gaze shifted from her face to her hand and back, concern darkening his eyes.
She kept her attention on him, needing the visual anchor to hold back the grim portent.
He must have known something was up, but other than a reassuring brush of his thumb over the back of her wrist before he let her go, he didn’t push.
Gathering her tattered composure, she forced her lips to curve up and turned to Sofia, deliberately keeping her eyes away from the food. “Want to come with me?”
Sofia studied her then set her fork down. “Sure.” She put aside her napkin and leaned into Russ to press a quick kiss to his cheek. “I’ll be right back.”
Cass couldn’t help glancing at the table as she turned away.
Fortunately, the spoiled, contaminated food was gone.
As unobtrusively as possible, she blew out a shaky breath of relief.
Sofia pushed her chair in, and then the two women followed the signs to the restrooms. The short trip was not long enough for Cass to figure out how to approach Sofia without tripping over the multitude of triggers that existed between the sisters, and she couldn’t erase the disturbing vision that was messing with her head.
She was still struggling with what to say as they stood at the basin, rinsing their hands, when Sofia took the lead.
“What did you see?” There was a brittle edge to her question.
Cass met Sofia’s gaze in the mirror, seeing the resentful light that her sister couldn’t hide. “A warning.”
“About…?”
She studied the stubborn set to Sofia’s jaw. “I don’t know.”
“Bullshit,” Sofia snapped, turning away to the hand dryer on the wall. She hit the rune next to it, and the dryer roared to life, making further conversation impossible.
Cass shook her hands over the sink then used one of the paper towels tucked in the corner so Sofia couldn’t storm out while the second dryer was going. She turned, taking in Sofia’s stiff shoulders.
As soon as the wall dryer fell quiet, she said, “Sofia—”
Her sister spun around, anger suffusing her face. “If you don’t want to tell me, fine. Just don’t lie.”
The betrayed hurt underlying Sofia’s fury tore at Cass’s heart. She was struggling to find a way to salvage the conversation when Sofia landed an even deeper cut.
“You know, I don’t get it.”
“Get what?” Cass asked cautiously.
“Why you did what you did.”
Cass tensed under the venomous lash of Sofia’s accusation. She didn’t need to be an Oracle to know where this was going. Sofia didn’t give her a chance to respond as years of resentment finally boiled over in a heart-shredding mess.
“Even when Yaya tried to explain to me, it made no sense. So make it make sense, Cass,” she demanded. “Tell me why you tried to kill yourself.” Tell me why you left me.
Cass heard the unspoken demand loud and clear. Hell, it had echoed in her ears for years even though Sofia had never actually said the words. “That wasn’t what I was doing,” Cass managed to choke out through the devastation of years of remorse. “I just wanted it to stop.”
“Wanted what to stop?” There was the merest bit of snideness in Sofia’s question that tore open old wounds.
Cass didn’t resort to her normal habit of being careful with her words. Instead, she gave Sofia what she wanted. The truth.
“All of it, Sofia. The visions, the pressure, the guilt.” The demand to see only the paths that lined Pythia’s accounts, regardless of the human costs. The pressure to become Mother’s pet monster—a pressure I broke under.
Sofia threw up her hands in agitation. “Oh, boo-fucking-hoo. You know you weren’t the only one to lose Thena. She was my sister too.”
The beloved name landed like a bomb between them, exposing the fracture that never closed. “I’m aware.”
“Are you?” Sofia’s eyes glittered with unshed tears and fury. “Because it sure as hell doesn’t seem like it. Not when you made damn sure everything was about you after she died.”
Anger, hot and bright, seared through Cass, and resentment charged in behind it. “Fuck you, Sofia. That’s so far from the truth it’s laughable.”
Sofia’s features were twisted and red, a testament to the depth of her rage. “Do you see me laughing, Cass?”
“No, but you sure sound like Mother.” The accusation was out before Cass could stop it.
Sofia flinched but quickly recovered and sneered. “Let me guess—this is all Mother’s fault, right?”
Refusing to acknowledge the flare of remorse that flickered under her rising frustration, Cass folded her arms. Maybe it would keep her from grabbing and shaking the shit out of her youngest sister. “Yeah, actually, it is.” Icy fury dripped from each syllable.
“Funny,” Sofia all but hissed. “I don’t remember Mother buying the messed-up hex that about killed you or walking out the damn door. That was all you.”
Cass felt that hit deep, but Sofia was far from done.
“And you leaving meant she needed a new heir apparent. It didn’t matter if I had other plans.
All that mattered was that an Ambrose would run Pythia.
Even if there was only one Ambrose left, and it wasn’t her precious Oracle or her beloved Harbinger.
Just a barely average Sage who could never meet her ridiculous standards no matter how hard she tried. Mother decided, so it was a done deal.”
The pain in her sister’s voice made it hard for Cass to talk. “And you think, what—that if I’d stayed, things would be different?”
That cut through Sofia’s fury and pulled her up short. “Well, yeah.”
“You’re wrong.” Cass’s soft response fell between them.
Sofia’s temper flickered then faded into cautious confusion as she held Cass’s gaze. “I’d say you don’t know, but…”
“But yeah.” Then Cass shared a dark truth that had been buried for over a decade.
“I tried to save Thena, you know. I warned Mother about what I saw, but she brushed me off.” She tried not to react when Sofia’s eyes widened with shock.
“She told me I wasn’t reading it right. It didn’t matter how much I argued—she was right, until she wasn’t.
And afterward…” Cass fought back the lump in her throat.
“Afterward, I looked, Sofia. I tried to find another way to survive her intentions. Every decision but one led to the same result within a year.”
Horrified realization was creeping in, erasing the angry flush and leaving Sofia pale. “What result, Cass?”
Cass held her gaze, refusing to voice it because there were some things even an Oracle didn’t want to tempt, and death was one of them. But her sister was an Alcmene. She knew.
Sofia swallowed hard and spun away to brace her hands on the edge of the sink. Her head dropped, and her shoulders slumped. Cass watched her, giving her space even though everything in her screamed to wrap her baby sister in her arms.
Finally, Sofia muttered in a choked voice, “Dammit, Cass.”
As the leading edge of the emotional storm eased, Cass carefully closed the distance between them so she could run a comforting hand down Sofia’s spine. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”
Sofia lifted her head, her eyes watery as she met Cass’s gaze in the mirror. “But not that you left.”
Unwilling to lie, Cass shook her head.
A storm of emotion flickered then faded as resignation filled Sofia’s face, and she looked away. “Yeah.”
She pushed away from the sink and straightened, forcing Cass to drop her hand. She turned until she could lean back against the sink and hugged herself as if cold. She studied Cass for a long moment. “Yaya knew, didn’t she?”
“She’s the one that encouraged me to leave.”
Sofia’s small smile had a bitter twist. “She loved you.”
“She loved you too.”
The bitterness disappeared. “Oh, I know.” Sofia was quiet. Then in a soft voice, she said, “It was easier, you know, when Yaya was here.”
“What was easier?” Cass asked cautiously.
Sofia waved a hand in the air. “Dealing with everything—Mother, the wedding, all of it. Now, though, without Yaya to referee, I don’t know…
” She shook her head. When she looked up, the poorly hidden signs of strain were back tenfold.
“Everything’s a fight, Cass, and I’m tired.
Russ is no help. Something’s going on at work, and Dad keeps looping him into these late-night meetings, which means it’s just me dealing with Mother’s edicts for the wedding.
Without Yaya stepping in, things are only going to get worse. ”
Guilt seared through Cass. As much as she wanted to offer to help with the wedding plans, there was no way Sofia would take her up on it. Not when putting Rhea and her oldest daughter in the same room was akin to lighting the fuse on unstable dynamite.
“What about Russ’s parents? Are they helping?” Cass asked.
“He lost them years ago, and he says he just wants to know when to show up. He’s leaving it all up to me and Mother.”
In an effort not to share her opinion that maybe Russ needed to think about Sofia instead of kissing up to his soon-to-be in-laws, Cass bit her tongue.
Sofia rubbed her forehead as tears welled in her eyes. “I miss her, damn it,” she muttered.
Cass didn’t know if she meant Yaya or Thena or both.
A tear rolled down Sofia’s cheek. She wiped at it viciously. “I hate this.”
Unable to stand by while her sister was in so much pain, Cass gathered the younger woman into her arms and held her tight. “It sucks.”
Sofia dropped her head to Cass’s shoulder as a shudder worked through her body. “It sucks hard, Cassie.”
Hearing her childhood nickname in a choked sob just about broke Cass’s heart, but she powered through. “I know, Sofie, but we’ll get through this. We always do.”
It was the wrong thing to say. Sofia stiffened and pulled back. “Yeah, I guess.” Her words were stilted, and she avoided Cass’s gaze as she turned back to the sink to erase the evidence of her tears and focused on her reflection. “The warning. What was it?”
Cass looked at the mirror to find Sofia watching her, her face composed. Her eyes held a grimness that hadn’t been there before, and Cass knew Sofia’s question was a test. One she couldn’t afford to fail.
“Rotten fruit and spiderwebs.”
Sofia’s eyes narrowed. “Death and ties.”
“Or lies and influence,” Cass countered.
Sofia’s “Hmm” didn’t convey much. She straightened as she balled up the damp paper towel. “How long are you staying in Vegas?”
Cass fought a wince. “A few days, at least. Longer if I need to.”
Sofia nodded as if that confirmed something. “We should probably head back.” She turned, tossed her used paper towels in the trash, and headed for the door. “Russ has to get back to the office.”
Cass caught Sofia’s arm, stopping her. “Are we okay?”
Her spine straight, her body rigid, Sofia was quiet for a moment. “I don’t know,” she said in a barely there voice before pulling out of Cass’s grip to open the door and walk away.