Chapter 36 Declan
DECLAN
Ewen has been gone for three days. Three days where I’ve been losing my mind with worry.
I’m terrified I’ll never get another chance to hold him, to see his eyes light up for me.
I’ve barely slept and haven’t really been home since the night of the kidnapping.
I found Murder Mittens when I went back.
Glad he’s still okay. The thought of the furball being hurt or lost would only cause Ewen more heartache when I got him home.
I spent last night watching—stalking—this James guy.
He’s not a local but the info was right, he is Enzo’s right-hand man.
Enzo took what he always wanted, the crew his father built.
And where the fuck was Geno? He was supposed to take over.
I know him, we’re not friendly, but I know him all the same.
He’s the Italian version of Ciaran. An heir to the throne.
Last we heard he ran off when he knocked up some chick.
I would chalk it up to Enzo taking him out, but he would have made it public. So, where the fuck is he?
James is a flashy man. Someone who probably couldn’t cut it in another big city’s crew and latched onto Enzo. He’s smart though. He still hasn’t led us to where they have Ewen.
My sweet Ewen. Where are you baby? Please be alive and safe. I refuse to think about anything bad that could be happening to him. Enzo is a sick bastard, killing his own family to take control.
I stay in the shadows, watching, waiting for James to show me what I need.
He’s boring. He fucks prostitutes like it’s his life’s mission.
I thought I could get him with one of our girls.
Lure him in. But he sticks to the ones he knows.
Plus, I don’t like to use women as bait.
I’ll just have to be patient. Even if that’s the last thing I want to do.
Ciaran has been helping me. I’ve never seen him get so dirty, but that’s the thing about war, you’ll do anything to win.
After finding out who killed Teresa he’s been thirsty for blood.
He killed four Bianchi members last night.
I helped leave our calling card for Enzo, carving his name into one dead guy’s chest and leaving a word on each member’s body.
Enzo we are coming.
Four dead bodies made it work perfectly.
After that, James avoided his second and third girl of the night, leading me somewhere of importance.
Their fucking warehouse. Finally. Is this where they have Ewen?
I can’t just rush in guns blazing. It’ll either get me killed, Ewen killed—if he’s still alive—or cause me nothing more than emotional distress from coming up empty.
So, I stand in the shadowy corner and watch, waiting for answers.
EWEN
Ihave no idea what day it is, or how long I’ve been here.
I want to say it’s been a couple days, but I could be wrong.
I’ve been locked in a cage like an animal.
Well, it’s more like a jail cell than a cage, but a cage nonetheless.
There’s a brick wall and three walls of bars.
I can tell we’re near the docks because I hear seagulls and boat horns.
A bucket is the only thing in here with me.
We aren’t going to talk about the smell coming from it.
It smelled like death when I woke, clearly I wasn’t the first person locked up here.
Someone will randomly throw food and a water bottle in. They don’t want me dead yet, but how long do they plan to keep me alive?
When I’m alone, which is a lot, I pray, begging God to save me, but I fear he’s turned his back on me. I committed my life to Him just to give myself to another.
Declan.
Oh, my Declan, how much I think of him when I’m not praying. He is the one thing that keeps me going. His lips and how they break me with the slightest graze. His jade eyes that only light up for me. The way he holds me at night.
I came to the realization I love him the night I was taken, but I never got a chance to tell Declan, and that hurts so much.
He’s told me so many times, and I was a fucking coward.
I was afraid. I was a priest. I couldn’t love another.
But I did, so much. I love him more than anything. More than God himself.
Mother Helen discovering us together wasn’t the end of my life. She was the angel coming to free me. I was just too stupid to realize it then.
If I ever have the chance to see Declan again, I’ll tell him. Tell him he’s the one I love, the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. Please God, let me tell him. Just once.