Chapter 39 Ewen
EWEN
I’m in shock. I killed a man. His life ended because I thought mine to be more valuable. I know there are bad people in the world. Even the Bible prepares you for it. But something the Bible doesn’t tell you is what good people will do when they’re given no other choice.
Live. Or die. Kill or be killed.
Declan came to save me. The moment I pulled that trigger I thought of nothing but him. Not God or religion. Only Declan. He was my saving grace. I had his voice talking to me, pushing me to survive.
I could have waited for him to be the full savior and end that man’s life. But at that moment, I didn’t know he was coming. I never lost faith in him—I just didn’t know when or how he’d find me.
It was then that I knew I never needed God.
I only needed Declan. He’s the one I want to spend the rest of my time loving, worshipping—being devout to only him.
It was on the drive to his place that I realized it is my home too.
It’s where I was taken but it felt more like home than anywhere else ever had.
The memory of the night I lost my parents made me feel emotions I thought I’d never experience. Love. True, deep, passionate love that borrows into your bones, fierce enough to demand everything you are.
I know I need a doctor but I’m in no hurry to see one. I’ll call Caleb later to come patch me up. Right now, I just need to feel Declan. His heartbeat is a steady lullaby to my nerves. Its strong beat righting all my wrongs. His warmth encasing me.
Leaning my head back, I rest it on his shoulder, turning so I can kiss his neck. I’ve never been the one to initiate things between us, but right now I need him. All his dark and dirty.
He moans and tightens his hold around me. I arch my ass into him, his erection stabbing into my back. I need to feel him in me. To truly let me know I’m alive and his.
Spinning in his arms, I bring his lips to mine. I devour him, gliding my hands over his body, feeling he’s real. He pulls back and says, “Baby, let’s get you clean and in bed. We have time later.”
Grabbing his face, I force him to look in my eyes. “No, I need you. All of you. Now.” His gaze bounces across my face, taking in my injuries. I see hesitation in his eyes. To put him at ease, I tell him, “I love you.”
Three simple words but with so much meaning to them. Words he’s said oodles of times to me yet never heard me say. “I love you so much. You and your love are what kept me going. I wanted to tell you. Needed you to know.”
Before I can tell him more he pounces. He grabs me and kisses me harder than I knew you could kiss someone. My back is shoved into the tile, not hard but still aggressively. He’s trying to be gentle.
He steps back and looks me up and down. My dick is at full salute, ready for him.
Begging him to touch it. He doesn’t say anything as he reaches for the loofah and body wash.
Regret slams into me. “Don’t worry that beautiful head with overthinking anything.
I will take you, I fucking promise. Just please let me wash that time off of you. ”
His words wash away the self-doubt. He steps in close and rubs the suds all over my body.
The cuts sting but I don’t care. He pulls down the shower head and rinses my neck and chest. Once the soap is gone his mouth is on me.
He continues to wash me, rinse me, placing a kiss wherever I have an injury.
Like his kisses will erase them. And they do.
He’s on his knees when he washes my legs and feet, cleaning every inch of my body.
He brings the loofah up to my crotch and starts washing me while twisting his soap covered hand around my dick. My head falls back against the tiles. I know he likes for me to watch him but right now I can’t. I just need to feel.
The loofah is removed and the water hitting my abs rinses away the soap. I feel him stand, then he crowds me. I still can’t bring myself to open my eyes. They’re too heavy and his presence is too heavenly.
He whispers, “Turn around for me,” and I do as he asks.
I’m flush against the tile. It’s cold against my chest. My hard-on is pressed between me and the wall.
He grabs my hips and pulls them out so my dick isn’t crushed anymore.
My ass is sticking out like I’m presenting it to him.
The loofah is back to traveling across my body.
When he gets to my derriere he kneads it, gripping and grabbing the flesh.
I yelp when a smack comes down on my ass, but I find myself following it up with a moan.
Never thought I would be this person, but Declan makes me needy.
The loofah falls to the ground and the water rushes over my body.
He replaces the shower head and crowds me again.
His hands slowly move up my sides and slide around my front.
His erection is pressed into my ass cheek.
He glides his grip south. I hold my breath, waiting for him to grab me again.
But he doesn’t. They go from my hips to my thighs.
I feel his whole body move down. I’m curious so I turn my head and look at him over my shoulder.
He sees me and smiles, slowly pulling my ass cheeks apart.
He winks at me before he places a kiss at my hole.
I turn back and rest my forehead against the tile.
His tongue explores me, teasing my opening.
A finger slides in and I moan. I know he loves the sound.
He draws them out of me with everything he does.
The pressure of another finger hurts for only a second before I feel him rubbing that spot.
My toes curl. I’m so close to coming and he’s barely touched my dick.
And then he’s gone. The need to whine is strong.
I know he’s not just going to stop. That’s not in his nature.
But I was almost there, I need to come. I hear him grabbing something from the shelf but don’t look.
Suddenly a cold liquid hits my hole. He has lube in the shower?
Whatever, I couldn’t care less. I just need him.
His crown pushes against my rim. “Open up for me, baby,” he growls.
My muscles relax, waiting for his intrusion.
Once his head is in he grabs my hips and slams himself in the rest of the way.
I gasp at the intrusion, but I don’t resist. “You got this. Take me.” His hips pull back and then he slams back in.
He’s rougher than before but he’s giving me exactly what I need.
The uncomfortableness is replaced by how amazing he feels. He pulls my body back, bringing me flush with him. One hand comes up and wraps around my throat. He applies pressure but doesn’t cut off my airflow. The other grips my cock and starts to jack me.
“That’s it. Feel me controlling you. You are mine and I’ll prove it to you until the end of time.” He bites my shoulder. Sensation consumes me. Every thought of what I went through is gone—all replaced by him and this moment. “I love you Ewen, fucking always.”
My head falls to his shoulder as I surrender myself to him. His hands work in tandem with his thrusts. The sounds of us echoing off the tile.
The zing at the base of my spine is intense. I’m only seconds away from blowing my load when his hand on my throat tightens. “Come for me.” I do as instructed and come hard. His movements get even more intense until he’s burying himself so deep in me I’ll probably be leaking his cum for a week.
My legs can’t hold me up anymore. I’m fully exhausted.
After everything that’s happened, I don’t think I can keep my eyes open another second.
Warm water runs over me and then it’s turned off.
Declan grabs my hand and pulls me from the shower.
I use him to help me stand. He slowly dries me off and then leads me to the bed.
I flop down and snuggle into the warmth of his blankets.
No, our blankets. This is my home now. He crawls in next to me and wraps me in his arms. “I love you so much Aingeal.”