Chapter 74
Chapter Seventy-Four
You’ve got the energy of a storm and the focus of a sniper.
—From Remy’s Affirmations from a Badass
Remy
“Nervous?” Walt nodded toward her tapping foot.
Remy smiled, embarrassed. For a woman who prided herself on generally keeping her shit together, the last months had thrown Remy for a loop more times than she cared to count.
But, in this instance—really, in any instance where Sebastian was at the heart of it—it seemed to be worth it. “Maybe a little,” she admitted. A lot.
Next to her husband, Walt’s wife Mira smiled knowingly. “That’s a good thing. We’re only nervous when it really matters.”
Remy nodded. In the last day, Walt and Mira had emerged as parental figures—a welcome and comforting discovery. It was as if she’d always known them. And their love for each other—even forty years into marriage—was vibrant and encouraging.
“We’ll be there in ten minutes,” Mira soothed, patting Remy’s leg.
Remy watched the Nashville landscape race by through the tinted windows of the spacious town car, reflecting on the white lies she’d told and the arms twisted.
First, she’d sworn Honor and Brinder to grudging secrecy before heading to LA.
She didn’t want Sebastian to know about her hail Mary attempt—unless she was successful.
Same pledge of secrecy for Nashville, only this time they were happier to comply, sensing a happy ending on the horizon.
So, after wishing her safe travels from LA to Tennessee, Honor and Brinder had zipped their lips.
That didn’t mean she and Sebastian hadn’t connected. They’d talked briefly on the phone as she’d headed to the airport to fly to LA, but Sebastian sounded hurried. Distracted. Remy had tried not to let that worry her. He was probably hammering out a PR battle plan with Melody and Slash.
So when she’d gotten a call from Honor at eight thirty Pacific time to tune in to the late show with Liam Blum, she actually thought her sister-in-law had finally lost it to sleep-deprivation-by-newborn. The last thing she’d needed was to hear any rot about her or Sebastian and their relationship.
But Honor had insisted, so Remy—tucked into the coziest guest suite ever—watched in wonder, and then in love, as Sebastian poured his heart out on national television, silencing the naysayers. And touching her heart.
Tears had poured down her cheeks. At some point, Mira and Walt came in, sitting on either side of her, each gently anchoring an arm around her. And Remy had to wonder…is this what it would have been like? Having parents who loved her?
Just before her phone rang, a favorite picture of her handsome husband gracing the screen, Walt had softly suggested a plan. One that would assure Sebastian of his lock on the role of Bram in Paradise…and also give her the stage, so to speak, to reveal her own heart.
Wily, dear man.
During a brief, but tear-drenched call—Remy uncomfortably lying that her screen was cracked from dropping her phone so he wouldn’t see her location over FaceTime—they whispered reassuring words and promises.
Sebastian told her his plan had been to fly directly from Manhattan to Virginia, but Walt had just contacted him via Slash and told him he expected Sebastian on the set.
Remy felt guilty for his obvious worry—she, of course, knew his role was safe—but trusted Walt to give her the right space to reveal her own truth.
And so she found herself headed toward her liege man, ready to give over the last piece of her heart.
Jared grinned at her, his pink paisley bow tie bobbed along with him as he pointed toward the set. “Bash is over there. He’s just working on his blocking for the next scene.”
Remy cleared her throat, her insides a jumble of nerves and exhilarated anticipation. She’d barely slept for two nights—truly hadn’t slept well since Sebastian had left for filming. Their bed seemed too big and lonely without him.
Mira convinced her to allow a makeup artist to touch things up, spiriting Remy into an empty trailer and working whatever magic could be had on a woman who was drained, fried, exhausted, excited, and deliriously in love.
“You ready?” Mira squeezed both her hands, eyes dancing. She was as incurable a romantic as her husband.
“As I’ll ever be.” Remy exhaled a deep breath and exited the trailer behind Mira, who was practically skipping, making her late seventies look like Remy’s thirties from an energy standpoint.
“Clear the set!” A voice called out over a loudspeaker, startling Remy even though she’d been prepared. Jumpy thing. She smiled, hearing Lila’s voice in her head. “Only Mr. Wheatley please on set. Clear the set.”
“Action!” whispered Walt, nudging her forward.
Remy managed to walk on wooden legs, giving off newborn giraffe vibes versus the wife of a Hollywood star.
Boss up, bitch.
Etta’s voice rang in her heart. Only now, it didn’t make her sad. The cherished voice brought a smile to her face and new resolve to her step.
She moved around the massive cranes and cameras, past a large table of food, and carefully stepped over rigging and cables.
In any other circumstance, she’d be fascinated.
Much like Sebastian had been when she’d brought him to observe a case in her OR, all wide-eyed and bouncing with excitement. Now? She was just anxious as hell.
Remy shifted out of view, pausing a moment to take in the thrill of Sebastian on set and in costume as Bram McLaughlin. So handsome. And, by some greater grace, he was hers. Sebastian’s hands were on his hips as he paced, and the worried look on his face galvanized her into action.
She stepped into the light, Sebastian turning quickly at the sound, his jaw dropping. Then he ran to her.
She leapt into his arms, burying her face in his neck. “I love you, Sebastian Wheatley. And I had to tell you that to your face.”
He pressed kisses all over her, then crushed his lips to hers. When they finally came up for air, he cradled her face. “I wanted to fly right to you last night. But they told me I had to report to set. I think—” he paused, eyes sad, “I think Walt may be firing me today.”
Remy shook her head, mimicking his soothing embrace, cradling his beautiful face in her hands. “No he’s not. The role is yours, Sebastian.” She lifted her shoulders and dropped them, grinning. “It’s yours. I’ve heard it straight from the man myself.”
“What—” Sebastian blurted, shocked.
“I’ll tell you more later. But I have something to say to you first, Sebastian. Something you deserve to hear, and that’s long overdue.” She held up a staying hand as he began to interrupt. “Don’t make me use my surgeon voice, Sebastian,” she teased.
“My queen,” he bowed theatrically, eyes sparkling. “I love you, Arabella.”
“And I love you. Sebastian,” she said, proud her voice wasn’t shaking as hard as her legs. “Your words last night—they were beautiful. I realized after I watched it over and over for about a dozen—or thirty—times that I had some things to say to you as well.”
A breath whooshed out of her, and with that, the last of her nerves.
Boss up. “I spent my youth being pitied. Sad Arabella with her druggie dad and alcoholic mom. Her vermin-infested apartments and her tattered, used clothes. Later, fear replaced pity,” she added, not actually regretting that particular byproduct of her personality.
“Worse was just the pure loneliness—so basic and elemental to me that I just accepted it as my life. It became a state of being for me. An emptiness I filled with work and volunteering. But my heart,” she stifled a sob, “was buried. I don’t think in my entire life I’d ever truly been happy.
“For a brief while with the Remingtons, I had just a taste of happy normalcy.” Sebastian tangled his fingers with hers, soothing her with his touch.
“But, as you know now, even that suffered the evil specter of Doug Greene. He’s gone now, and he can’t ever hurt me again.
Just like no one can bring Tasha and Etta back.
But I realized something during all this chaos the last couple days.
I am halfway through my life—maybe more, who knows—and I’m happy.
So truly happy…happier than I ever could’ve imagined, even in my wildest, most wistful childhood dreams.”
Remy unlinked a hand, pressing her fingers into one eye, uncaring at the state of the carefully applied mascara. “I’ve also been scared, Sebastian. More than I’ve ever been…and I’ve been through some terrifying stuff.” She laughed through her tears, her throat thick with the need to shed them.
“My beautiful queen,” Sebastian soothed, bringing their still-laced hands up to his mouth, pressing a tender kiss on the back of her hand.
Queenager. Remy thought of the term Nell shared. This was her season of life to reign.
Bolstered, she continued, inexorably driven to purge the pain. “I realized, I haven’t been fair to you. This whole time, I’ve been reminding myself—warning myself—there’s an expiration date on us. That while you love me now, eventually, it’ll burn out. And you’ll leave me too.”
“Arabella—” he began emphatically, but she simply shook her head.
“I don’t really know any Shakespeare, but I know the human body.
Particularly the musculoskeletal system.
And I know that it all works in connection.
How when one part is out of whack, the whole thing can go wonky.
That’s how I feel about life before you.
I was out of whack. Then you came along, with your charm and your dad jokes and your gentle love, and you…
you healed me. This whole time, I was placing on you my own fear of abandonment. ”
“I will never leave you. Never stop loving you, Arabella,” he whispered fervently.
“I know that. And I’m sorry—so sorry—for making you the scapegoat for my own emotional inadequacies. You deserve more than that. You are the truest, most constant, kindest, most amazing person I’ve ever met. If there was an expiration date on us, it would’ve come from me, not you.”
“That’s not happening.” He watched her intently. “You’re mine, Arabella.”
“You’re right. That’s not happening. And you’re mine, Sebastian.” She cleared the tears from her throat. “Remember that morning when you referred to yourself as an everything person? You’re everything to me, Sebastian. Everything.”
“I’ll strive to please you every day,” he whispered against her lips, a benediction of their commitment to each other.
“I’m counting on it,” she added, sealing the words with a tear-drenched kiss. “Don’t make me bring out the scalpels. Apparently I’m fierce with them.”
She was also fierce about her love for Sebastian. Her fated mate. And whatever else happened, he was hers. For life.