Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Glancing up at the darkening clouds, Gemma sighed as a large, fat raindrop landed on her forehead.
Great. Couldn’t the weather have waited another ten minutes before unleashing rain on them?
The afternoon had felt as though it had dragged on for ten hours.
At least. And now that the children had gone home for the day, all she could think about was Jonathan and their conversation in his office at lunchtime.
Why had she reached out to him and touched his hand?
What had she been thinking? It made been too familiar, especially since he’d made it perfectly clear how he felt about her.
She made her way over to one of the red scooters and picked it up.
Normally she enjoyed tidying up their section of the playground, normally she’d be racing children on a scooter towards the shed as they all tidied up together, but she’d lost track of time this afternoon and before she’d known it home time had been upon them, hence why she and Annie were now putting away the bikes, scooters and other equipment the children had been playing with.
‘Hey, Gemma. I’ll be back in a few minutes. I just need to take this,’ Annie called from the shed and held her mobile in the air.
‘No worries. I’ll get it cleared.’ Hopefully, the rain and the incoming chill would clear her head, too.
She hadn’t been thinking at all when she’d reached out to touch him.
She’d acted on impulse, wanting to comfort him.
Nothing else. She would have done the same to anyone, and he’d think the same.
In fact, he probably wouldn’t be thinking anything.
She could guarantee he hadn’t given it a second’s thought. Heck, he probably hadn’t even noticed.
Hearing the click of the door from her classroom shut, she glanced across the playground, her heart fluttering as she watched Jonathan walk across the playground towards her.
What should she do? What did he want? Quickly turning away again, she pretended not to have noticed him and continued towards the shed, collecting a tricycle on her way.
Hefting the heavy tricycle up over the rim of the shed floor, she groaned as one of the back wheels knocked the doorstop out of the way and the door began to close.
‘Gemma, have you got a moment? I’d like to speak to you about something.’ Stepping forward, Jonathan stepped into the doorway and held the door open.
Gemma rolled the tricycle into place before slipping the scooter into a small gap beside it and straightening her back. ‘Oh, hi. Sorry, I was... I didn’t see you.’
‘Do you have a minute?’ He stepped forward, letting go of the door, which began to creak shut behind him.
‘No, don’t…’ Jumping forward, Gemma shot her hand out towards the door, but it was too late, the click of the latch sounded, and they were plunged into darkness. Sighing, she completed her sentence, ‘Don’t let the door shut.’
‘Oh, sorry. I’ll just…’ Turning, he pushed at it, trying again and again when it didn’t budge. ‘It won’t open.’
‘Nope, it won’t. The lock catches.’ She tugged at the neckline of her jumper. She didn’t need this. Not today. And not with him. She hated small spaces at the best of times, but to be stuck in such a space with the man she…
‘That’s why Annie asked for it to be repaired.’ His voice was a whisper, and in the darkness she could just imagine him slapping his hand across his forehead.
‘Yep, that’s right.’ She shifted position and heard a clatter behind her.
Holding her breath, she waited as whatever it was she’d knocked settled back into position, relieved that nothing had fallen on either of them.
She patted the pocket of her trousers. Why hadn’t she brought her mobile with her?
Jonathan cleared his throat, and a few seconds later, a beam of light shone from his mobile, straight into Gemma’s eyes.
Moving it, Jonathan grimaced, waved his mobile around, the light from the torch app illuminating the bikes, tricycles and scooters surrounding them.
‘Sorry. There must be something we can open it with.’
‘There isn’t.’ Gemma settled her back against the shelf at the back of the shed and tried to steady her breathing. ‘It’s the lock. It clicked shut, which is why we put a doorstop there, only I just knocked it when I was pulling the tricycle in.’
‘And I stepped away, letting the door shut behind me.’
‘Yep.’ She let out a small burst of laughter before wiping her hand across her forehead, the perspiration on her hand glistening on her skin in the torchlight. ‘Sorry, I… It’s a laugh or cry moment.’
‘Please don’t cry.’ He frowned and stepped towards her, carefully picking his way around the bikes and scooters.
She forced a grin, curling her hands into fists by her sides. ‘I won’t. Annie should be back out in a few minutes. She’s just taking a call. She’ll see there are still bikes and scooters to be put away so she’ll come to help.’
‘Right.’ Jonathan nodded and took another step closer. ‘You’re claustrophobic, aren’t you?’
‘No, not really.’ She swallowed. She couldn’t admit the extent of her phobia, not now, not in this situation.
If she did, it would only make things worse.
Instead, she tried to focus on the spicy aroma of his aftershave mixing with the mustiness of the shed.
‘I just don’t like being trapped in small spaces, that’s all. ’
Reaching out, he rubbed her forearm. ‘I’m sorry. I should have listened to Annie and I should have prioritised getting the lock fixed. It’s not safe.’
Shaking her head, she looked up at him. ‘You couldn’t. There’s so much that needs fixing around here, the hall roof for one. Plus, you’ve only just started the job, you can’t possibly know what needs to be done.’
‘No, but…’ He set his jaw, his hand still on her arm. ‘This should never have happened. What if you’d been trapped in here on your own, and Annie wasn’t about? You could have been in here all night…’
‘Please don’t.’ Gemma squeaked as she reached out to grasp him, gripping his arms with her hands.
Before she knew what was happening, he’d enveloped her in his arms, and she lay her head against his chest, the steady beating of his heart slowing her rapid breathing.
They’d be okay. Annie would be back in a few minutes. It wouldn’t be long.
‘Do you know her number? I could call her. Joanne has gone home for the day, or else I’d have rung the office.’ His breath tickled the top of her head as he spoke.
She shook her head, still clinging to him. She began counting in her head: one elephant, two elephants, three elephants... Annie had said she’d only be a couple of minutes on the phone, and it must have been at least that by now.
Taking his arms from around her, Jonathan cupped her elbows and tilted her face up so they were looking at each other. ‘I will get this fixed. I promise.’
Wishing his arms were still wrapped around her, she mumbled, ‘Thanks.’
‘Gemma! Gemma!’ Annie’s voice grew louder the closer she got to the shed.
Reluctantly pulling away from him, Gemma squeezed past him and picked her way quickly over to the door, banging on it as soon as she reached it. ‘Annie. In here!’
‘Oh, this damn door. I told you it’d end up trapping someone inside.
And you, of all people, what with your claustrophobia.
Of course, I know you don’t call it that, Gem, but that’s what it is.
Didn’t I tell Mr Higgs about the lock, too?
I damn well did. He won’t be hearing the last of this.
..’ Annie continued mumbling as she fiddled with the lock and finally yanked the door open.
As the dim light from outside shone into the shed, Gemma held her hand over her eyes as she hurried to freedom.
The rain was pelting down now, but she didn’t care.
In fact, she loved it. The feel of the cold water on her face and quickly soaking through her jumper to her skin proved to her she was outside, that she was free.
She’d happily stay out here and get drenched if it meant she didn’t have to go back in there anytime soon.
She stepped aside as Jonathan followed her out.
‘Oh, Mr Higgs. I...’ Annie’s face paled as she realised the subject of her ranting had indeed heard everything she’d said.
Holding his hand up, palm forward, Jonathan shook his head slightly. ‘You’re right, it does need fixing, and I’ll get onto that first thing in the morning. I’m sorry for not taking your request seriously.’
‘Well, I... thank you.’ Annie stuttered before turning to Gemma and laying her hand on her colleague’s shoulder. ‘You go on in and get yourself a cuppa. I’ll finish off here.’
‘Are you sure?’ Gemma felt bad for not insisting she was fine and that she’d continue to help, but truth be told, the last thing she wanted was to risk getting shut in there again. Besides, there wasn’t much more to tidy away, anyway.
‘Positive. Just check in on me if I’m longer than ten minutes. I don’t fancy getting stuck in there either.’ Annie gave a sheepish smile before making her way across the playground to retreive a couple of scooters.
‘Are you okay?’ Jonathan looked her up and down.
‘I will be.’ Gemma nodded. ‘Thank you for...’ She waved her hand in the direction of the shed. How was she supposed to word it? Comforting her? Locking her inside? ‘What did you want to talk to me about?’
Holding his hand out and indicating the door to her classroom, they walked in silence until they were inside and he had closed the door behind them. ‘I wanted to apologise.’
‘What for?’ She knew what for. He had finally decided to face up to what had happened between them and speak about it.
‘For Saturday night. For...’ He waved a hand between them.
‘When we almost kissed?’ She walked across to a table and perched on the edge, suddenly not trusting her legs to keep her upright. ‘You want to make sure I know it was a mistake.’
Tilting his head, he looked at her a moment before shaking his head. ‘It wasn’t on my part. Not for the reason you think, anyway.’
Snapping her head up, she frowned. It hadn’t been a mistake? Or it had? He wasn’t making any sense. ‘I don’t understand.’
Walking towards her, he perched on the table opposite her.
‘I wanted to. I wanted to kiss you. Heck, I want to now, but what you said on Saturday night was right, it wouldn’t work between us.
Not with what’s going on at the moment with the school.
You said you were worried people would think I was favouring you if I didn’t make you redundant when the time comes?
You said people would think that was the only reason you were with me. ’
Looking down at her shoes, she nodded. She had said that, and now he was agreeing.
‘Any other time, in any other circumstance, I would love to get to know you better. I would love…’ Despite his voice cracking, he continued. ‘There’s nothing I want more than to explore this connection between us.’
She stubbed the toe of her shoe against the floor, leaving a little smear of black polish on the blue linoleum. She blinked. ‘Is that why you’ve been avoiding me?’
‘Avoiding you?’
‘Yes, you could have come and spoken to me yesterday or earlier today. Or Sunday even. Or when I came to your office...’ She let her voice trail off, she was sure she had given enough examples.
‘I could have, yes.’ He dragged the palm of his hand over his face. ‘But after watching you and your friend duck behind your hedge in your front garden when you heard me coming, I assumed you were avoiding the conversation also.’
‘Oh.’ Gemma felt the glow of embarrassment sweep across her face, and she kept her eyes fixed on the floor. ‘I didn’t realise you’d seen me.’
‘No, I guessed that.’ He chuckled wryly, a sadness creeping into his voice as he pushed himself to standing. ‘Anyway, I should go.’
Gemma listened to him leave before finally looking up and swiping at her eyes as the tears began to fall. Why was she upset? She’d been the one to tell him the reasons against getting together in the first place. He’d said nothing she hadn’t.
‘Aw, Gem. Are you okay?’ Having finished tidying the playground, Annie must have seen her crying before pushing the door open and hurrying towards her. ‘That must have been such a shock for you, getting stuck in like that.’
‘I’m okay. Sorry, I...’ Pulling a tissue from her pocket, Gemma dragged it across her cheeks and took a deep breath in. ‘I guess it just shook me up more than I thought it had.’
‘That’s understandable.’ Annie reached around and gave Gemma a shoulder hug. ‘Why don’t you get off home? I know you like to stay late and get set up for tomorrow, but you look as though you need an early night.’
‘Yes, I think you’re right.’ Taking a deep, shuddering breath, Gemma pushed herself to standing and went to get her bag from the cupboard.
‘Oh, I meant to ask, what did Jonathan want with you? Did he need to speak to us both?’
Turning to face her again, Gemma forced a smile. ‘Oh, nothing, really. I think he just came to see what the lock was like.’
‘Really? And there I was moaning about him not taking my repair request seriously.’ Annie held her palms against her cheeks. ‘He must think I’m really impatient.’
‘No, he knows it’s been broken a long time.’ She hitched the handle of her canvas bag higher up on her shoulder. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’
‘Yes, see you. And stick your feet up and get some binge-watching in or something this evening. You deserve it.’
Nodding, Gemma turned and walked out of the classroom. Annie’s idea of watching TV and forgetting about what had just happened sounded as though it was just what Gemma needed. Only not for the reason Annie thought.