Chapter 31
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
The Ranch
I kicked Cas out of my bed in the middle of the night. He didn’t want to go, but we were tempting fate.
After he’d made me beg, he wouldn’t let me come for an hour. I wasn’t complaining. When he finally slid inside me, I came immediately and it had been one of the most powerful orgasms of my life. I’d bitten his shoulder to keep from screaming.
I was tired, wrung out and ready to fall into deep sleep.
My phone was on silent, but it lit up with a text.
Cas
You kicked me out of your bed and for that you will be punished.
Me
looking forward to it. X
I fell into a light doze and just as I was drifting off to sleep, the conversation I had with the girls floated through my head. Poet had been about to say something when Declan had interrupted.
Suddenly, I was wide awake. I opened my calendar app and scrolled from the previous month to the current one.
My period was late.
Very late.
I was on birth control so why was my—
I’d spent the night with Cas in the hotel, and we’d used condoms. Every single time.
Had one of them failed?
Was stress the reason my period was late?
It had been a hell of a homecoming.
But the bloating and my pants no longer fitting comfortably . . .
I had no other symptoms that I might be pregnant.
Still . . .
A niggle of worry took root. There was no way I would be able to go to sleep. Not now.
But what the hell was I supposed to do? Sneak out of my house and pray the hot bull rider in the room next to me didn’t wake up?
It was 3:04 a.m. when I pulled into a drug store in Coeur d’Alene. It was 3:10 a.m. when I bought a pregnancy test. It was 3:14 a.m. when I peed on said pregnancy test in the drug store bathroom. It was 3:19 am when a big, fat, pink plus sign showed up on the pregnancy test.
A knock sounded on the door.
“Be out in a second!” I called back.
I hastily shoved the pregnancy test back into the box and into my purse. I quickly washed my hands, and then I opened the door and came face to face with the middle-aged store clerk in her blue vest and a look of worry on her face.
“It’s all yours,” I said, gesturing to the door.
“Oh, I don’t need the restroom. I just wanted to check on you.”
I promptly burst into tears.
“Aww, yeah, I thought that might be the case,” she said.
And even though she was a complete stranger, she pulled me into a maternal embrace and patted my back.
“It’ll be okay,” she crooned.
I stepped back and wiped the tears from my eyes. “You’re really nice.”
She smiled. “Do you want a cookie? I’ve got some up front.”
Nodding, I followed her toward the register.
“How did you know I was—that I’m . . .”
I couldn’t even finish the sentence because my brain still hadn’t wrapped around the truth.
“We don’t get a lot of foot traffic this time of night. And a young woman coming in looking a bit frazzled, wearing two different shoes”—she pointed to my feet—“asking for a pregnancy test—it was an easy bet.”
I looked down at my feet. One clog and one of Muddy’s loafers. “Would you look at that.”
“Sit,” she said, gesturing to the chair behind the counter. “I need to stretch my legs a bit.”
“So, a cookie?” I asked hopefully.
She smiled. “There’s a bag next to the register.”
I found the plastic bag of cookies and took one.
“Pumpkin chocolate chip,” she explained. “Secret family recipe.”
I bit into it and immediately felt better. “This is so good.”
“Goes better with milk. Hang on.”
She walked to the mini fridge of drinks and pulled out a plastic bottle of milk. She unscrewed the lid and handed it to me. “On the house.”
“Thank you. God, you’re nice.” I took the milk from her and drank half of it in one go. “Yeah, you’re right. That was perfect.”
“So, I’m guessing this wasn’t a planned thing?”
I shook my head.
“Some of the best things in life aren’t planned,” she murmured. “You have family?”
I nodded.
“Are they supportive?”
I nodded again.
“The father . . .”
I winced and shrugged.
How the hell is Cas going to take this news?
I’d been warned that he wasn’t a family man. Did I really expect him to stick around?
I finished off the cookie and rubbed the crumbs on my sweats. “Thank you for this. It was—I don’t even know your name.”
She looked down at her vest. “Oh, shoot. I forgot my name tag.” She reached over to the register and ran her hand underneath the drawer. “There it is!”
She held up her name tag and pinned it to her vest. “I’m Kathleen.”
“Kathleen,” I whispered, my eyes filling with tears again. “It was really nice to meet you.”
“The pleasure was all mine, sweetie. The pleasure was all mine.”
“You’re avoiding me,” Cas said three days later.
“What? No,” I lied as I unlatched the chicken coop gate. “I’ve been with my dad. Talking to him. Keeping his spirits up, you know?”
“Your dad falls asleep after like, ten minutes of conversation,” he said. “You’re telling me you sit by his bedside for hours while he sleeps?”
I frowned. “How do you know he falls asleep that fast?”
“Because it happened the other day when I spoke to him.”
“Why did you speak to him?” I demanded.
“I wanted to introduce myself,” he said. “And stop trying to change the subject.”
“Is that why you’re cornering me at five a.m. at the chicken coop?” I asked.
“You’re not an early riser by nature,” Cas said. “So why are you at the chicken coop this early?”
“I’m pitching in.” I found a brown egg and put it in the basket.
“You’re quiet at family dinners, and then you escape up to your room. You don’t invite me to your bed. You’re avoiding me because of what I said.”
I frowned. “What did you say?”
“I told you I loved you, and then you ghosted me.”
“I didn’t ghost you,” I mumbled.
“I told you I loved you, and you never said it back, and now you’re absolutely ghosting me. I want to know why.”
“I did too—tell you I loved you,” I fired back, feeling my cheeks heat with anger.
“Uh, no you didn’t.”
“Did too.”
“Did not.”
“I took you to the tree,” I clarified. “And then I told you the truth about my tattoo.” I raised my eyebrows. “That means I love you.”
“In what language?” he snapped. “Because I speak English.”
“I thought you spoke Salem.”
“You expected me to realize those two things meant you loved me?”
“Yes.”
“And you don’t see the problem with that?”
“What? Do you want roses and chocolates or something?” I glared. “You and I are both people of action. Not words.”
“And yet, I still said the words. And if you do love me, then that doesn’t change the fact that you’ve been avoiding me and I want to know why.”
I clamped my mouth shut.
“Ah, so I get to guess why you ghosted me. Lucky me.” He pushed the brim of his hat back. “Okay, let’s see. Your emotions scare you.”
When I didn’t give an inclination that he was right or wrong, he continued.
“You slept with someone else and don’t want to tell me. But, I gotta say, if you did that—”
“I didn’t sleep with anyone else, you idiot,” I retorted. “And screw you for even suggesting that could be an option. I wouldn’t hurt you that way.”
“I don’t think you’d hurt me that way either,” he protested. “But God damn it, Salem. You give me so little. Some reassurance would be nice, you know?”
“Oh my God, do you want it on a billboard? Salem loves Cas Bowman and is pregnant with his baby!”
Cas went still. “Say that again.”
“I’d rather not,” I grumbled, feeling my cheeks heat.
“Salem!” he barked.
I sighed. “Salem loves Cas Bowman.”
“Not that part. I already knew that part. I’m talking about the pregnant with my baby part.”
I swallowed. “The first night we were together . . . we had a failure of some sort.”
“Not operator error,” he said, his voice sounding very far away.
“No, not operator error,” I agreed. “We were regular Boy Scouts. But one of the condoms was clearly defective.”
“You said you were on birth control.”
“I was. Am.” I sighed. “It was a perfect storm, Cas. A perfect storm that resulted in a positive pregnancy test.”
He gripped a fence post that surrounded the chicken coop. “You found out three days ago, didn’t you?”
I nodded.
“Salem, look at me.”
With a sigh, I turned to face him and waited.
“Now we have to tell people.”
“No. We don’t. Not until after the wedding,” I stated. “I won’t do it, Cas. I won’t steal the limelight from my sister. This is her time. If I announce this, it’s just going to cause drama. I want her to be happy. She deserves her day. Surely we can keep this between us for a little while.”
“You’re having a baby. Our baby.”
I nodded.
“This changes everything.”
“I know.”
“Salem?”
“Yeah.”
“Put down the basket.”
“Why?”
“Just do it.”
With a sigh, I set it down. Cas came toward me and wrapped me in his arms. “I’ve got you.”
I buried my face in his shirt and breathed him in.
“I’ve got you both. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Did you and Bowman make up from your fight?” Muddy asked.
I closed the back door and set the basket of eggs onto the counter. “What are you talking about?”
“Rule number one: I know all. I see all.” She lifted a cup of coffee to her lips and waited.
“Still not following,” I lied.
“I saw you two hugging in the chicken coop, but not before you both were gesturing wildly at each other. No doubt your voices were raised?”
“Were you standing in the kitchen and spying on us?” I demanded.
“Of course not. I stood on the back porch and spied on you.” She grinned. “Couldn’t hear anything, though. Not even when the wind changed.”
“You need a hobby,” I muttered.
“I have one. Several actually.”
“Meddling in your granddaughters’ lives is not a hobby.”
“Sit,” she commanded.
I sat at the kitchen table.
“Are you going to tell me why you snuck out of here a few nights ago?”
I stilled.
“No use lying, sugar. I woke up and heard the truck engine rumble out of here.”
“I thought you slept with ear plugs.”
“Not right now. Not if your father needs something. I have to be able to hear him.”
Did that mean she’d heard us the other night? My cheeks heated at the thought.
“Funny things, secrets. They always have a way of coming out.” She smirked. “Like you and Bowman sharing a bed.”
I groaned. “You know everything.”
“Sugar, you have to at least pretend to be quiet.”
I looked at her in horror. “Oh God—”
“Relax. I’m kidding. Though I’m glad to see my suspicions were correct. You were the reason Bowman went on a motorcycle ride, but you’re also the reason he came back. Right?”
“Yes.”
“And you’re together now?”
“Yes.”
Please don’t ask, please don’t ask, please don’t ask.
“Are you excited to see Wyn and Poet in a couple of days?”
The change in conversation threw me. “Yes. Very excited.”
“I’m glad they’re coming a few days before the wedding. I’m looking forward to getting to know them better.”
“Yeah. You’ll love them.”
“I know I will.” She nodded. “So how are they going to feel?”
“Feel? About what?”
She cocked her head to the side. “About sharing their apartment with a baby.”