8. Chapter 8
After only a couple days, Thomas felt the thrill of his new life waning.
As it turned out, servants didn’t sleep as much as he was accustomed to.
Also, he was never truly clean; he smelled like he slept with a pack of wolves.
Could he keep up with a life of work? He was beyond tempted to throw his charade out the window and take himself to White’s to drown his self-doubt with something to drink.
Or he could quit. It would be easy enough to do.
If he revealed himself—after a long bath—it could all be written off as a lark.
But he didn’t have the time or the money to go to a club, and he was determined to stick it out for at least two weeks. For the hat, of course. Well, that and the fact that he’d never hear the end of it from Samuel if he failed.
He was just about to crawl into his too small bed when Mrs. Bitters called for him.
“Tom, His Grace wants to speak with you in his study.”
There really was no rest for the weary. “I’ll be there shortly, Mrs. Bitters.” He stepped into his worn shoes and went to see what Samuel needed.
Samuel was staring out the window when Thomas came into the room. “Have you spent much time with Lady Lavender?”
Thomas rubbed a hand down his hairy face. “Excuse me?”
Samuel tipped his head to the window. “Lady Lavender is out in the garden. What do you know about her?”
Thomas thought about what he knew. “The woman loves her books. The children and your mother adore her.” He stepped up beside Samuel and watched Lavender shiver on the bench outside.
“She has terrible reactions to bee stings.” He kept his remarks short and succinct on purpose.
He didn’t think Samuel wanted to know about the way she made him stand taller when she walked by, or that she smelled divine, or that he found the lady creeping into his dreams at night.
“She spends most of her nights outside in the garden. Would you be up to the task of making sure she’s safe out there?”
“Do you expect trouble?” Thomas looked around to see if anyone else was in sight.
“No, not particularly. But Miriam worries about her being out there alone.”
“I’ll accompany her every night if you wish it.”
Samuel clapped a hand on Thomas’s shoulder. “Thank you. And take her a shawl, it looks like she’s cold.”
A few minutes later, Thomas found Lady Lavender sitting on a wooden bench beside a flower bed. He handed her the shawl he’d brought and turned so as not to intrude upon her solitude.
Thomas shifted back and forth on his feet. He didn’t know precisely what to do with himself. As a servant, what was appropriate? “The duke has assigned me with your protection while you are here,” he blurted, feeling a need to explain his prolonged presence.
“He has been very good to me. I am not surprised,” Lavender scooted over on the bench to make room for him. “Thank you for bringing me a shawl. I didn’t expect it to be chilly tonight. Would you like to sit?”
Thomas questioned his move. Sitting here with her would feel more like a romantic rendezvous in the garden than a guard. But she’d asked it of him. Was he allowed to say no? “I don’t wish to intrude upon your thoughts. I can do some work in the garden for a while.” He stepped away.
“Tom,” Lady Lavender’s voice was soft, yet commanding. “I do not intend to draw out your workday for you. I can go back inside.”
Thomas didn’t want to ruin her evening, but he didn’t want to have to explain himself to the duke either for acting inappropriately.
He wrestled with the options for only a moment, and Lady Lavender won out.
“I don’t want to cut your time out here short.
But if I get in trouble for this, I expect you to come to my rescue.
” He sat as far away from her as he could manage.
For both of their good. He was far too attracted to her to allow himself to become so familiar. Besides, he likely smelled terrible.
Lady Lavender smiled. “I’ll be a regular knight in shining armor. Thank you. I know it is not what is done, but I find myself unable to care at the moment. I’m expected to be doing an awful lot right now, and I’m failing. I just . . . I just need to be outside for a while.”
Thomas felt for her. A week ago, he was in her shoes, trying his level best to be what other people expected of him—admittedly, it was not a high bar. There were still expectations of him, but they felt different now.
“And what expectations are those, my lady?”
She ignored his question and changed topics. “Did you know that at my home, our groundskeeper, Henry, was always the person to watch over me? I didn’t even know how well he was doing it until just recently. I have the utmost respect for him, and for you, to take my safety so seriously.”
Thomas answered honestly, “I was not aware of that. How long has haunting the garden been a habit of yours?”
“Since I was old enough to escape the nursery without my nurse knowing. If it had been up to her, I would never set foot out of doors. But a person can’t be cooped up all the time. I suppose she had good reason to worry. I tend to cause quite a stir upon occasion.”
Thomas felt the truth of that statement in every fiber of his being. She’d been causing a stir in him since the first moment he’d set eyes on her. But he guessed that she was talking about something entirely different. “Do elaborate.”
She laughed. “I fear you are imagining a child much like Daniel. He has Miriam’s spirit in him. But I have not been half so exciting as he is a day in my life.”
“I beg to differ.” Thomas bit his tongue. He was a servant; he could not argue or flirt with the daughter of an earl.
She smiled shyly at his comment. “It is the bees that keep me indoors. I’ve been stung a handful of times, and . . . ” She shuddered. “Let’s just say it is quite awful.”
Thomas nodded his understanding. “So you feel safer at night, when they aren’t out.”
“Precisely.” She took a deep breath. “Where did you grow up?”
“Kent, mostly.”
“And do you have any irrational fears? I feel you must tell me something, else I feel far too exposed for my frailty.”
Thomas knit his brow. “Your fear of bees is not irrational, Lady Lavender. You are wise to be on your guard; the world would be a duller place without you in it.”
He watched as her eyes filled with tears. Goodness, he hadn’t meant to make her cry. He was simply stating facts. But he felt a tug to ease her heightened emotion all the same. “If you promise not to tell a soul, I can tell you my fear. I have an irrational fear of dusting.”
“Dusting?” A smile crept onto her face as she blinked back her tears. “What a hardship that must be.”
Thomas put a hand over his heart. “It is fortunate that I was not hired as a maid, or I would be shaking in my boots every day.”
She laughed. “I do not take you as the type of person to shake at anything, Tom. You are built to make your place in this world.”
Thomas grinned. “You have been looking at the way I’m built?” he teased.
Lady Lavender’s cheeks went rosy. “It’s a little difficult to ignore,” she muttered barely above a whisper.
Thomas had never felt quite so puffed up in all his life. It wasn’t that he hadn’t been complimented in the past. It was that the compliment was sincere. She would gain nothing from flirting with the servants. The feeling of her approval was a dangerous thing.
He stood, abruptly. “Thank you, my lady. I’m going to check the lock on the gate.
” He bowed upon his hasty retreat. Lady Lavender’s words settled upon his shoulders.
You are built to make your place in this world.
If only she knew who he really was, how lost he’d become.
And if she was correct, where would his place be when the whole scandal of his supposed treason blew over?