CHAPTER TEN
Asher
From: asher_williams@
To: miguelhrodr@
Subject: Asher Williams
Hi Miguel,
It’s been a while. Hope you’re doing great. I’ve been trying to reach you, but it looks like you have a different number now. I was hoping we could catch up, so please get in touch as soon as you can.
Asher
Ihit send, shoved the laptop aside, and rubbed a palm over my face.
It wasn’t everything I wanted to say, but if I pushed and Miguel kept ignoring me like he had for years, I’d never get the answers I needed.
And if I did manage to talk to him—if he confirmed Dad had made a mistake like everyone else seemed to think—I’d have to accept it and move on.
Knowing the truth wouldn’t bring him back, but at least I’d get closure.
I straightened on the stool and snapped the laptop shut just as my mother appeared in the doorway. Kaia hadn’t wanted me to say anything, but after she lost her job, I sure as fuck couldn’t stay quiet.
“Good morning,” Mom said, heading for the coffee maker. “You’re up early. Training?”
I should have been—but I was taking Kaia to the beach instead. “Not today. I wanted to talk to you while we’re alone.”
She poured coffee into a mug. “Okay. What’s going on?”
“Kaia waited for you yesterday. She lost her job because you didn’t show.”
Mom leaned against the counter, sighed, and tapped her nails on the mug.
“She doesn’t need to work. Believe me. It’s just a rebellious phase teenagers go through.
They think their parents are against them.
Kaia doesn’t realize her dad’s looking out for her.
Why take a job that pays next to nothing when he’s always made sure she has everything she needs? ”
A dry laugh scraped out of me. How could she be so oblivious?
“Why do I race, then?” I asked. “Dad left me enough money.”
She sipped her coffee and looked out the window. “It’s not the same.”
“Did you forget her on purpose?”
She turned, eyes flashing. “Who do you think I am?”
“Someone who thinks her boyfriend is a fucking saint and refuses to see the obvious.”
She set her mug on the counter and folded her arms around herself. “So, we’re back to this? You’re going to behave like you did five years ago?”
I wasn’t fifteen anymore. I still didn’t like Russell—or who my mother became with him—but it was her life. Dad wasn’t coming back. I could handle myself, but Kaia was too young to suffer her father’s neglect.
I scoffed. “Don’t worry. I won’t cause problems with your boyfriend. I just wanted to know what was more important than picking Kaia up and taking her to work.”
“It’s just too much sometimes. I’m the one who takes her everywhere. It’s hard to keep up with her schedule.”
Bullshit. I stood, grabbed my laptop, and headed for the door. Staying meant saying something that would shred our fragile peace even more.
“I can take Kaia places,” I said. “In fact, I’m taking her to the beach today. Hopefully your boyfriend doesn’t think breathing fresh air counts as rebellion.”
She didn’t answer, but her dramatic sigh followed me out of the kitchen.
***
I drove Kaia to a beach near Emerport. Perfect—white sand stretched for a mile, and seagulls were our only company, crying overhead as they dove for food. Kaia giggled, wide-eyed, as we strolled the water’s edge.
“How can they see the fish when the ocean’s so choppy?”
“Instinct, I guess.” I touched her elbow lightly, steering her away from a tide pool cutting across the sand. “Do you like the beach?”
“Love it. I haven’t been to one in forever.”
I couldn’t say the same. Back home in El Puerto, I’d spent hours by the ocean. Early jogs along the wooden walkway at Playa de las Redes always cleared my head.
“What do you do when you feel overwhelmed?”
Kaia gave me a shy smile. The breeze tossed her wavy hair, and she didn’t bother taming it. I loved that—her comfort with me. “I write in my diary. Sometimes I stretch or dance. But walking on the beach is amazing. If I had a car, I’d come here all the time.”
“I’m sorry about your job, peque. It wasn’t fair.”
“It wasn’t.” She shoved her hands into the pockets of her red puffer jacket. “The worst part is I probably won’t find another one. Between school, dancing, and therapy, it’s harder than it looks.”
“Therapy?”
She sidestepped a clump of seaweed. “Yeah. My father thinks talking to Dr. White once a week should stop me from missing Mom. It doesn’t. I’ve been going for years, and I don’t even trust the guy. It’s a giant waste of time.”
I filled my lungs with briny air and tilted my head back, letting the wind ruffle my hair. “This is the best therapy. The ocean. Fresh air. Great company.”
Kaia’s soft giggle made me glance at her. Her blue eyes shone, and she looked so beautiful it hurt to stare. “You called me great company,” she said. “Guess I’m not the small, annoying kid anymore.”
“You’ve never been annoying.”
She nudged my ribs with her fist. “Liar. You couldn’t wait to get rid of me when you were fifteen.”
I stopped walking. “Was that the impression I gave you? You were the only thing that made moving to the States bearable.”
Pink bloomed across her cheeks. “Oh. I’d never have guessed. You did everything you could to go back to Spain.”
“After Dad died, all my mother and I did was fight,” I said over the murmur of waves.
“And it got worse when she dropped the news about seeing someone else. I couldn’t understand how she was ready to move on while I wasn’t.
I missed Dad. And it pissed me off that she made decisions that affected me without asking.
A few dinners with your father weren’t enough for me to know him. ”
“That was more than what I got.” Kaia resumed walking. “I know my father met your mother on a business trip, but I’d never even seen her. One day, he just announced she’d be living with us and acted like the years he spent with Mom didn’t matter. Honestly, I don’t think I matter to him, either.”
This morning’s conversation with my mother surfaced, pressing heavy against my chest. Russell’s parenting sucked, and I didn’t see it changing. Kaia deserved better.
I nodded toward the dry stretch of sand. “Let’s sit there?”
She agreed, and I spread my jacket for us. It barely fit two, our thighs brushing. Close enough to smell her hair, hear her soft breaths—and close enough that I had to get a grip. My reaction to everything about her was anything but friendly.
I wasn’t supposed to like her. For a hundred reasons. Russell would lose his shit, ground her for life, and probably ruin my career. I needed to focus on racing, on making money. So why the fuck did my heart stutter every time our eyes met?
Probably the same reason I’d gotten jealous of that kid at the club who’d stepped on her toes.
Kaia hugged her knees. “Thank you, Ash.”
“For what?”
She stared into the distance, her expression vacant. “For bringing me here today. If I’d stayed home, I’d have cried or argued with my father. He’s probably glad I was fired—he never wanted me working. You know what’s sad?”
The wind blew a strand of hair into her eyes. On impulse, I brushed it back, my fingertips lingering too long against her skin.
Her breath hitched, and I pulled away. “What’s sad?”
“My father hates everything that brings me joy.”
“Your father is an asshole.”
She snorted. “He acts like one, for sure.” After a pause: “Mom used to tell me I should do what made me happy.”
“That’s what Dad told me too,” I said. “He never said I had to race like him, but I can’t picture doing anything else.”
“You were definitely born to race, peque.”
I barked a laugh. “What did you just call me?”
“Peque,” Kaia deadpanned. “Because you’re—Ash!” She broke into hysterics as I ran my fingers along her ribs. “Stop!”
“You’ve got a jacket on.” I tickled her again. “No way you feel that. Liar.”
She snorted, seizing my wrists. “Would you rather I ditched the jacket?”
Hell, yes. Or—hell no. I didn’t trust myself when she was wrapped in layers, let alone if she wasn’t.
An image of her in that black top from the club flashed through my mind—followed by one of her naked—and my guard slipped.
Long enough for her to tackle me into the sand, sliding her hands under my hoodie as she climbed on top of me.
Her fingers danced along my sides, and I grinned. “Yeah. Just like that. Feels so fucking good.”
She slapped my chest, gasping. “You’re awful!”
“I’m not ticklish there, peque. Sorry to disappoint.”
Her concentrated pout was too damn cute. I traced her bottom lip with my thumb. “Want me to fake it?”
She narrowed her eyes, and I shook with laughter. God, this was amazing. I hadn’t had this much fun in forever.
“It’s sad if you need to fake,” she said.
I bent my knees, sliding her forward an inch. Having her on top of me was a terrible idea, but I was a fucking masochist. “It’d be sad if you faked, peque. Good thing you’ll never have to do that with me.”
Kaia’s lips parted, pupils darkening. Fuck. Panic seized me, heart hammering. I eased her off my lap and sat upright.
I shouldn’t have said that. Not because I didn’t mean it—because I did.
***
After the beach, I took Kaia to a cozy diner Ale had recommended. Dark red leather booths lined the walls, and pop music hummed softly overhead.
“It’s too much food,” she said, eyeing the plates of steak, potatoes, and grilled vegetables spread between us.
I picked up my knife. “Didn’t you say you’re always starving after a day outside?”
“Yeah, but. . .” She sighed. “Thank you. For this and the beach.”
“Stop it, peque.” She had nothing to thank me for. I’d loved every second of the beach with her, and there was no way I’d let her go hungry. It was the bare minimum—and it was fucking sad she wasn’t used to being cared for.
Kaia dug in. I found myself grinning, watching her savor each bite.
“What?” she asked.
“Thinking about ordering more.”
She lowered her fork. “I really hope you’re kidding.”
“Maybe, unless you’re hungry when the food is gone.” I took a sip of water. “Studying takes fuel, and you’ve been doing a lot of that.”
Kaia pushed a strip of grilled pepper around her plate. “Unfortunately, with zero results.”
I arched a brow.
She sighed. “This is embarrassing.”
“I doubt it.”
She leaned back in the booth. “I’m still a junior. After Mom died, everything was too much. I went to class but couldn’t focus. I had to repeat eighth grade. That’s why my father’s so strict. He thinks I would’ve passed if I’d just studied harder. But I don’t think I’m smart enough.”
It hurt like hell hearing her talk about herself that way. “You were grieving,” I said. “Your father can’t expect you to carry on like nothing happened. I know what that feels like, remember? Some days I couldn’t even get out of bed. If it hadn’t been for Grandma, I wouldn’t have graduated.”
Kaia traced the edge of the table with her nail, frowning.
“You’re right. But it still sucks. It sucks feeling like everyone else has their shit together.
If I score low on the PSATs again…” Her voice cracked.
“I can’t. I need to do well. I need to get into Mom’s dream school next year. I promised her.”
I reached across the table, covering her hand with mine. “I’ll help you however I can. Quiz you, study with you—whatever you need.”
A timid smile softened her face. “Thank you. Right now, I think I’ll take a milkshake.”
Reluctantly, I let go of her fingers and flagged the waitress.
I’d buy her every milkshake in the world if it kept that smile on her face.
***
It was pitch-dark when we walked up the driveway. “I wish the day was longer,” Kaia said, voicing my own thoughts as she toyed with the key.
After she unlocked the door, I followed her inside. “We can go out again.”
“If her father lets her.” Russell stood in the foyer, glare fixed on us.
“Your sense of responsibility leaves much to be desired.” His gaze pinned Kaia like she’d committed a crime—when all she’d done was spend a day at the beach after weeks of studying.
“It’s past eleven. You have school tomorrow.
Be more mindful if you want to dance at the showcase next Friday. ”
He drained the joy from the room in seconds. The spark in her eyes dulled, and she slipped upstairs without a word.
Fuck. It was my fault. I’d never forgive myself if she lost something else she loved. Being fired was already enough.
“She did nothing wrong,” I told him once her footsteps faded. Protecting her from his wrath didn’t mean I’d stomach the way he treated her.
“Well.” His cold stare met mine. “This is my house, my rules. She lives under my roof—a very nice roof I’m paying for. Are you questioning my parenting, Asher?”
I wanted to tell him to go fuck himself, but I wouldn’t forgive myself if Kaia lost another thing she loved. I clenched my jaw as I turned and went up the stairs without a word.
Passing Kaia’s door, I didn’t knock.
What I wanted didn’t matter—not when she was already struggling and I risked making it worse. The only way I could help was by keeping my distance.