Chapter 17 Valentina
VALENTINA
His eyes drop to my lips, and the look in his eyes has every nerve ending in my body firing.
I should pull away. I meant what I said about behaving.
My ego can’t take any more rejection.
But the heat radiating from his body makes thinking straight impossible.
My fingers itch to explore the hard planes of muscle beneath his shirt.
I curl my hand into a fist against his chest to stop myself from giving in.
"You okay?" he murmurs, voice rough with something that makes my stomach flip.
"Yeah." The word comes out breathy because it’s hard to breathe with him so close. "I'm good."
And I am. Despite everything that’s happened today, I feel strangely calm in this moment.
Safe.
Even growing up surrounded by my brothers' protection, I've never felt this complete sense of shelter, like nothing in the world can touch me as long as I'm in his arms.
I lift my head from his shoulder, suddenly overwhelmed with gratitude.
This man risked everything for me today. Killed for me without hesitation.
Brought me somewhere no one could find us.
"Thank you." The words feel inadequate. "For today. For… everything."
His eyes soften, his hand coming up to brush a strand of hair from my face. "You never have to thank me for keeping you safe, Valentina."
My name on his lips sends a shiver through me.
Our faces are so close now that I can feel his breath mingling with mine.
His gaze drops to my mouth again, and the anticipation of what could happen makes my pulse race wildly.
Just one inch.
That's all it would take to close the distance between us.
“I wouldn’t have survived without you.”
He doesn’t respond.
He just keeps looking at me with those same intense eyes that make everything inside me go molten hot.
A second later, he’s the one who closes the gap, pressing his lips to mine.
At first it’s tentative, but then he groans, and his mouth moves against mine with urgency.
His kiss blazes into something fierce and all-consuming.
His hand slides into my hair, angling my head to deepen the kiss.
My lips part on a gasp, and he takes full advantage, his tongue sweeping against mine.
I've been kissed before, but nothing like this.
Nothing that makes me feel like I'm burning from the inside out.
"Valentina," he breathes against my mouth, and I feel like he wants me to push him away.
But I don’t want to.
Not tonight.
Not when tomorrow promises nothing but the continuation of my nightmare.
I pull him closer.
It’s almost like his tether breaks.
He rolls us, his weight settling over me as he braces himself on his forearms, his warm, firm body against mine.
"Tell me to stop," he whispers, his dark eyes searching mine. "Tell me now, or I won't be able to."
"Don't stop.” I thread my fingers in his hair. "I want this. I want you."
His response is to capture my mouth again, the kiss deeper, more demanding. His hand slides down my side, over my hip, finding the hem of my dress. When his fingers brush against the bare skin of my thigh, I arch into him, seeking more.
“I’m going to hell.” He trails kisses down my throat. “But first, I’ll take you to heaven.”
His palm skims upward, over my ribs, brushing the underside of my breast with gentleness.
I writhe beneath him, need coiling, making me feel agitated.
I want more, now, faster.
But his touch is slow, deliberate, as if he’s being careful.
I gasp when his thumb circles my nipple through the fabric of my dress, the sensation shooting straight to my core.
“Oh!” I arch into his touch, my entire body a livewire of sensation. His movements slow as he removes my dress and bra, leaving me in just my underwear.
I should feel exposed, vulnerable, but all I feel is beautiful and wanted as his gaze travels over me with raw hunger.
"You're perfect,” he says with a reverence in his tone that makes me believe it.
His mouth traces a path down my neck, across my collarbone, until he reaches my breast.
I gasp when his lips close around my nipple, the wet heat of his tongue sending shockwaves through me.
My hips rise involuntarily, seeking friction against him.
"Cristian," I breathe, not even sure what I'm asking for, only knowing I need more.
He seems to understand what I can't articulate. His hand slides down my stomach, fingers playing at the waistband of my underwear.
When his fingers slip beneath the fabric and find me slick and ready, we both groan.
“Fuck, you’re so wet," he murmurs against my skin. “Just for me.”
Yes, for him.
Only him.
But I can’t form the words as his fingers brush over a sensitive bundle of nerves.
Oh, my God, it feels so good.
Just like it did in the car, except better.
When his finger finally pushes inside me, I’m about to come undone. “Cristian.”
"Relax," he whispers, kissing me deeply as he adds a second finger, stretching me gently.
But I’ve been here before where he pleasures me but then pushes me away. This time, I want all of him. “I want you inside—”
"Patience. Let me take care of you."
I do, surrendering completely to his touch.
His thumb continues its relentless circles while his fingers curl inside me, finding a spot that makes stars explode behind my eyelids.
The pressure builds and builds until I'm panting, clutching at his shoulders.
"That's it," he encourages. "Come for me, Valentina."
And I do, shattering around his fingers with a cry he captures with his mouth.
As I float back to awareness, my body still buzzing with aftershocks, Cristian presses gentle kisses down my stomach. Amazingly, each touch of his lips sends new tremors through me.
"Amazing," he murmurs against my skin, moving lower and lower.
He slides down the bed, settling between my thighs.
My breath catches when I think I understand what he’s planning.
“Cristian?” Suddenly, I feel shy, unsure.
“You’re alright. Let me show you how good you can feel. Trust me?” His eyes lock with mine, dark and intense.
I nod, unable to form words as he hooks his fingers into my underwear, sliding them down my legs.
The first sweep of his tongue through my folds makes me gasp, my back arching off the bed.
"Oh, my God," I breathe, unprepared for the sensation.
His hands grip my thighs, holding me open as he tastes me with long strokes and then short, quick flicks of his tongue over my clit.
Immediately, I’m on fire again.
When he closes his lips around my clit and sucks gently, I cry out, my fingers tangling in his hair.
The pressure builds faster this time, more intense than before.
"Cristian, I'm—" My words dissolve into a moan as another orgasm crashes over me, stronger than the first.
Through the haze of pleasure, I reach for him.
I’m a little worried that this is his plan.
Just pleasure me but not take from me what I want to give him—my virginity. "I want you. All of you."
"Valentina…" He moves back up my body, pressing his forehead against mine. "It's not that I don't want to. God knows, I do." As if to prove it to me, he grinds his arousal against me. It makes me all the more determined.
"I want it to be you. Only you."
“You don’t know what you’re asking, baby.”
He called me baby. My insides well with emotion. “I do. I know exactly what I’m asking.”
“It’s a dangerous game.”
The reminder of reality crashes over me.
What am I doing?
This man has already risked everything today to keep me safe.
How can I ask him to gamble with his life for one night of pleasure?
I drop my hand, shame washing through me. "I'm sorry. After everything you've done for me today, I’m being selfish. I don’t want to risk your being killed because of me.”
“I’m not worried about me. It’s all about protecting you.”
"What's there to protect? I'm already dead with Maksim.
From the moment I walk down that aisle, whatever life I might have had ends.
" I lift my gaze to his. "At least this way, I'll know what being with a man is supposed to be like.
What it feels like to be wanted, not as a possession or a prize, but as a woman. "
Something breaks in his expression. His hand cups my cheek, thumb stroking across my lower lip.
"You deserve so much better than this. More than one night in a dingy hotel room."
I don’t disagree, but this is all I have. “If one night is all I get, then that’s what I want.”
He closes his eyes, exhaling slowly. When he looks at me again, the heat in his eyes tells me his decision is made.
"One night. But after that, we can never speak of it again."
The condition makes my chest ache. It’s not fair that I have to hide this connection I have with him, keep my true feelings a secret.
But I'm desperate enough to accept his terms.
I nod in agreement, reaching for him.
His mouth finds mine, the kiss conveying a hunger too powerful to deny any longer.
Then he rises from the bed, and I watch, utterly transfixed, as Cristian removes his shirt.
My breath catches at the sight of him, all sculpted muscle and battle scars.
"You're beautiful," I say, my mouth going dry at the sight of him.
A ghost of a smile touches his lips. "That's my line."
His hands move to his belt, and my breath catches. I've never seen a man fully naked before.
He pushes his pants and boxer briefs down, and holy moly, he’s long and thick.
He joins me on the bed again, his body settling between my thighs. When he dips his head to kiss my neck, my collarbone, my breasts, I arch into him, desperate for more.
"Cristian, please," I gasp as his fingers slide inside my folds again, circling, teasing.
"Patience," he murmurs against my skin.
But the ache inside me builds until I'm writhing beneath him.
My fingers clutch at him, urging him to stop teasing me. He positions himself, and I feel him against my entrance. Instinctively, I tense.
"Look at me," he commands softly.
I do, finding his dark eyes intense with desire. He holds my gaze as he pushes forward, entering me with agonizing slowness.
The stretch is uncomfortable at first, and then a sharp pain makes me gasp. He stills immediately, concern flooding his features.
I’m afraid he’s going to abandon this.
"I'm okay.” I will my body to relax around him. "Don't stop."
He kisses me deeply and lulls me into relaxing.
He sinks fully into me, and when he begins to move, the sensation is beyond anything I could have imagined.
It’s not just pleasure, but something more.
Like we’re one.
Like my heart, my soul, is now his.