Resting Quietly #5
“Why would you do that?” Reg demanded, but he did it lying on his side, staring across the pillow space at Anthony with wounded eyes.
“Because,” Anthony told him. “Because you didn’t give them a chance. It wasn’t fair. They wanted to send you to school, did you know that? And you know what?”
“What?”
“Chance knew. Chance knew, and I don’t think he could have kept it to himself for much longer. They were so hurt—do you know that? They felt like it was their fault, that they hadn’t made you feel like you could be accepted if they knew the real you—”
“That’s bullshit!” Reg exclaimed. “I just didn’t want to go away. Don’t you get that? I didn’t want to go away… and fade… and be forgotten—”
“We would never forget you!” Anthony couldn’t yell—not from his current position—but he could put his passion into the words.
“Reg, baby… don’t you see? It’s not that you didn’t want to go to college, it’s that you didn’t even give them a chance to send you.
It’s that you… you tried to make yourself invisible so you didn’t make waves.
Don’t you think they deserve the chance to see you? ”
He sighed, and Anthony could feel the press of their oft-broken sleep on him too.
“I’m so unremarkab—”
Anthony kissed him. Slowly, druggingly, a kiss designed to let the both of them, as they lay prone, drift off to sleep. When he pulled away, Reg frowned, but neither of them were going anywhere when they finished what they had to say. Bed was just such a nice place to be.
“What?” he asked, yawning. “What are you trying to accomplish?”
“I’m trying to let you know that I see you and I think you’re amazing,” Anthony told him, yawning back. “Now go to sleep. We can discuss this when we wake up, and I’ll set our alarm so we can go visit the boys and Adelle.” He grunted. “It’s going to be a while before we see them again.”
And that right there was a warning as to why they should hash their shit out and get over their irritation. You never knew when the people you cared about would get yanked right out of your life.
Reg seemed to arrive at the same conclusion. “I love you,” he muttered. “But don’t make decisions for me.”
“I love you,” Anthony told him, his own eyes closing. “Don’t minimize yourself because you’re afraid to shake up your family. They can take it. I see you, and you’re so much more than that.”
“My God, you talk a lot,” Reg mumbled, rolling over so he could curl up in a ball.
“And you worry a lot. We’re fine.” Anthony curled up behind him, spooning him like they were made to fit together.
Reg yawned and relaxed back against him, and Anthony’s last thought as they drifted off was that they were made to fit together, and it was awesome Reg saw that.
THEY MADE it to the hospital by the promised time, a lunch of apples, chips, and granola bars promising they’d be hungry sooner than later.
But once they got there and saw the three of them—cleaned, rested, and peaceful, if sad—they forgot about their hunger and the need for that last hour of nap and remembered to be profoundly grateful that everybody was going to be okay.
Reg, for one, had never felt the good fortune he’d been born into so deeply in his life.
“It’s okay, isn’t it?” Ilia asked almost before they’d cleared the threshold. “Reg, your mom, who’s the greatest, said we could keep all the books.”
“Totally okay,” Reg answered, smiling a little after their hug.
“My parents’ house, my apartment—filled with books.
” It was true, too, although—and here was more good fortune—he read mostly from his phone, or from the Kindle currently on the end table by his bed.
“Honestly, it’s just awesome that you guys like to read. ”
Reynaldo gave a weak chuckle and a smile, still lying back in bed. “They say I’m going to be still tired for a couple of weeks after this,” he said, his voice harsh from coughing. “So, like, they’ll check me out, but I’m going to spend a lot of time reading.”
“I’ll read to you,” Ilia said staunchly, and Reynaldo’s quiet worship made Reg’s heart ache.
“You do that,” Anthony said, ruffling the boy’s hair. “Keep you out of trouble.”
Ilia rolled his eyes. “Oh, like either of us can ever get into trouble again. Man, we’re on our third country. We’ve got to be, like, extra good, or they’ll yeet us off the planet next time!”
“The first two weren’t your fault!” Reg said, his heart sinking. Oh no. No, this was so unfair! For the boys to believe they were responsible when the truth was, the world was just that fucking unfair.
“Oh, we know,” Ilia said with a fatalistic shrug. “But still, it’s better to be good right now than sorry later, right?”
“Yeah,” Anthony said, giving Reg a sideways glance. “But it’s also important to remember that you deserve to be happy.” His lecturing tone faded, and he gave them both a misty look. “God, kids—I know we’ve got to leave you here, but please, for us, you’ll be happy, right?”
Ilia threw himself into Anthony’s arms for a hug and then into Reg’s, and Reynaldo insisted that they come to hug him too.
“You’ll come visit, yes? When things are not so crazy?” Ilia asked, his voice throbbing with need.
“My brother comes up to Canada about twice a year,” Reg promised. “And he usually brings Anthony’s father. I think we can manage a visit.” He paused and swallowed. “When things are not so crazy.”
“And when school is not in session,” Adelle said. “You need to take over my classes, Reg.”
Reg stared at her. “Adelle, I’ve got my IT certificate. You know I need more than that to teach school in California.”
She scowled at him. “I know you’ve had more art classes and have read more books about art than I ever will,” she said stubbornly. “And the children love you.”
“But Adelle!” Reg protested. “There’s… I’d have to take at least three more years of school to become a teacher.”
She snorted. “You need the same thing I have,” she said dismissively. “Forged papers.”
Reg gaped at her.
She shrugged. “I wanted away from my brother. I wanted another life, and Gael, he understood. He’s not a stupid man, my brother, and for as many terrible, terrible things he has done”—she looked sad—“he loves his family. He paid much money to have my papers forged, and he sent me here with that money, and I went to school, and nobody questioned things until the government went insane. And in the meantime, he sent Reynaldo to me the same way. Because he loves us, and he wanted us to be safe, even if we didn’t want his life.
So here we are—two people who were illegally in the country, working for a better life, and now in another country, mostly legally, and doing the same. Are we criminals, Reg?”
“No,” he said, his voice hoarse. “You both deserved to be treated better. But it’s not the same—”
“No,” she said. “Because your life isn’t at stake.”
Reg sucked in a breath, and she shook her head.
“I’m sorry. That was cruel—and an oversimplification. But Reg, you have all the qualifications to do my job. You just lack the… the paperwork. You’re so smart and so good with the things that make the paperwork. Isn’t there any way you could make this happen?”
Reg gazed at her unhappily. “I can try,” he said after a moment. “I can’t… I can’t promise, Adelle. It’s not like the principal likes the art department anyway. And I’m pretty sure he hates my gay volunteering ass as a general rule.”
She gave him the sort of expression that said, well, he probably did hate Reg, but she wasn’t going to say anything. “Try, mijo,” she urged firmly. “My students deserve you.”
They talked some more after that, and gave more hugs—and more promises to stay in touch, if they could—before they left, taking a rideshare from the hospital.
But not back to the hotel. As they were standing in front of the entrance, Anthony fiddled on his phone for a bit before giving an “Oooh” sound.
“What?” Reg asked, peering over his shoulder—and secretly thrilled with the comfort he felt, doing that. “What are you doing without me?”
“I,” Anthony said smugly, “am finding us a place to eat early dinner. Or, you know, late lunch. Or food at a nice restaurant that hopefully won’t kick us out for looking like college kids.”
Reg grimaced. Yeah, neither of them had been packing for a date when they left home.
“And did you find such a place?”
“Zzzt zzt zzt….” Anthony shooed him off and then finished his business, glancing up with a smile after he hit Send. “Now wait. The rideshare will get us there, and we’ll experience it together.”
Reg cocked his head. “Experience it? Isn’t that a little chancy? What if what we’re experiencing is ptomaine and dead rats?”
Anthony cackled—as Reg had meant him to do. “Are you kidding? Trust me, Registrar. I check out reviews, you know.”
Reg glanced away, embarrassed as he always was with the use of his full name. “Why do you have to do that?” he muttered.
Anthony drew closer and planted a very sweet kiss on his cheek. “Because I see all of you—even your name. I love it all. I have for months. Now that I finally get to tell you, I’m not holding back.”
“Well,” Reg sniffed, so pleased he almost couldn’t play. “After that, I guess I’ll risk ptomaine.”
Anthony laughed again, the sound resonating in Reg’s stomach. “You won’t get ptomaine,” he promised. “Unless you order the fish.”
They were still cackling when their car pulled up.
THEY BOTH gasped when they neared the restaurant—easily spotted because it was a modern wood structure with a glass wraparound window overlooking Sooke Harbor.
They were far enough from the boating slips to see the amphibious planes take off and land, and Reg couldn’t help it.
He spent long minutes nibbling soft, fresh brown bread and watching the planes in awe.
He even took off his new glasses and cleaned them on the hem of his shirt, using a little water, to make sure his view was perfect.
After a bit, he realized he’d let the silence at the table run on too long and turned to find Anthony staring at him with a sort of glowing look that made him squirm.