Chapter Ten
She’d done it.
Moira had Changed in front of him.
She’d showed Cam her animal.
She pursed her lips and curled her knees closer to her chest at the thought of it.
Moira had waited until Cam was asleep last night, and then she had Changed into her black cat, crept up to the edge of the bed and waited as her animal took him in.
Her animal hadn’t been able to stop watching him.
And then Cam, who had been sleeping on his stomach, reached for her in his sleep. When he found the bed empty, he’d propped up and looked over at her spot and then locked eyes with the little cat. With her.
He didn’t balk or flinch away. He laid like that for five seconds and then pushed up on the bed and offered his hand for her to sniff.
Her little cat had rubbed her head against his hand, and then did lap after lap rubbing against his hand as he petted her.
And without a single word, Cam pulled her to his chest and hugged the little cat and within minutes his body was relaxed and his breathing steady.
And that was that.
For the next couple of hours, her cat had melted into his arms and went to sleep purring louder than she could ever remember purring before.
And then as always, she got the zoomies at three in the morning, and he had watched her run around like a mad cat with this amused look on his face.
He accepted her.
He wasn’t put off by her animal. He didn’t make fun of her for being so small or twitching around in the middle of the night needing to just run around and expel her feline energy.
She was just his either way, and there was something so satisfying about the ability to be her exact self with this man.
“What are you thinking about?” Cam asked from beside her in his truck.
Moira rolled her head against the seat to look at him. “You were nice to my cat last night.”
“Thank you for not clawing me,” he joked.
“I’m also thinking about the flight.”
“What about it?” he asked, his voice going somber.
“About the distance.”
His barrel chest filled as he inhaled deeply. His eyes on the road ahead of them, he nodded. “I’ve been thinking about that too.”
“We can text each other,” she said with a shrug. She was trying for nonchalance, but her tone came out sadder than she’d intended.
“Yeah,” he said. “And video chatting.”
“Yeah,” she uttered softly.
It just didn’t feel like enough.
He followed the airport signs to the departures area and pulled his truck over to the curb to let her out. Neither of them said anything for a full minute. They both just stared ahead. Moira was trying to keep the burning sensation inside of her eyes.
“This is so stupid,” she whispered.
“The stupidest,” he agreed. Cam slid his hand to her thigh and looked over at her. His eyes were bright gold, and his animal felt heavy in the small cab of his truck. “I don’t want you to leave me.”
But he didn’t even realize how bad it was for her.
Not only was she leaving Cam, in a way, it felt like she was leaving herself here in Colorado too.
She liked herself with him. She liked this version of Moira.
She liked the people. She liked belonging, but most of all…
most of all…she liked herself when she was around Cam.
She felt beautiful and wanted and smart, and funny.
She didn’t feel lonely here.
“This makes no sense,” she said on a breath. “You shouldn’t feel so big. I just met you.”
“Nah, that’s not how it works for our people, and you know it.”
Moira frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Come on,” he murmured, giving her a look.
“What?” she asked, confused.
“A bond is a bond is a bond. It doesn’t matter if I’ve known you for eight minutes or eighty years. It always feels big once.”
“Once,” she whispered.
“Once in a lifetime.”
What he said clicked so many things into place. A bond? A mating bond? No. Those weren’t meant for all shifters, and a bond certainly wasn’t meant for her. She was bad at people. Bad at relationships. She wasn’t worthy of one…right?
But there was a sadness in Cam’s eyes when he told her, “I don’t want to be away from you.”
“But this is what you do,” she said stubbornly. “You fuck girls when you need to, and keep your distance from everyone, and you don’t feel. We were safe from a bond because you don’t feel for other people. Me either.”
He just stared at her, waiting.
“But…but…a bond wasn’t meant for me.”
His smile was so handsome. “I don’t think that’s up to you, or up to me. I think it just happens when it’s supposed to happen.”
“But…you’re a grizzly shifter. I am a housecat.”
“I don’t care about that.”
“But you live in Colorado, and I’m from Arizona.”
“It’s unfortunate and makes things complicated.”
“But…I have to leave you.”
“I know.”
Panicking, she fluttered her hands, shaking out the tingles there. “What do we do with this?”
“I think we figure it out,” he said.
“Figure it out,” she repeated in a whisper. “How do we even begin to do that?”
He leaned over and cupped the back of her neck, dragging her into the kiss. His lips were perfect against hers, drinking her in, quieting the loud thoughts in her mind.
Her eyes were burning again, and to her mortification, tears streamed to her cheeks. She ended the kiss and gasped in a sob and hugged him tighter than she had ever hugged anyone in her life. “I don’t want to go.”
She shoved him hard and pushed the door open. She didn’t want him to see her cry. She didn’t cry! This was weak, and she was not this type of girl.
“I can get your bag,” he said.
“I don’t want you to,” she sobbed. “You ruined everything.” She yanked the luggage out of the back seat and shut the door, then placed her hand on the passenger’s side door to slam it.
“I think I love you,” she said through a sob. Then she slammed the door and walked away.
Moira was crying hard now, and she forced herself not to look back as she walked through the sliding glass doors.
She walked straight to the nearest bathroom and pulled her luggage right into the corner stall and pressed her back against the wall. She looked up at the white tile ceiling and broke down like some lovesick pup.
He’d broken her into whatever this was, and part of her was angry.
This flight home was supposed to be easy, but she wondered now if she’d ever done anything this difficult in her entire life.
Her phone vibrated, and she pulled it from her purse, and checked the text that came across the screen.
I love you too. From Cam.
There was an image attached, and she sniffled and opened it.
It was a purchase receipt for the Woodpecker Inn. Lodge Five had been reserved for next year’s UnValentine’s Day week.
Wait, what?
Another text came through. I’m booking your flights here as soon as you give me your information.
I don’t want anyone else for Valentine’s Day.
Every year, I only want you. For Valentine’s Day, for Christmas, for Easter, for New Years…
for every holiday, I want to spend them with you.
Have a safe flight. Text me when you land.
I’ll be waiting. Moira…read that again. I’ll. Be. Waiting.
Her smile dislodged two more tears to her cheeks as she stared at the phone screen and reread it all again.
She was the one he wanted? Her? Moira Jennings?
She clutched the phone to her chest and hugged it tightly. Maybe last night wasn’t the only night she would feel like she belonged somewhere. Maybe more nights like that would exist for her.
Hope bloomed in her chest, and she typed out a response that made perfect sense to her heart in this moment.
I can’t wait to come back to you and feel like myself again. Send.
Cam put a heart response on that immediately.
And okay. Okay.
They were going to figure it out, like he’d said. Maybe this wasn’t going to be easy, but that was okay. The effort would be worth it. She just knew it.
This had felt big from the moment Cam had kissed her, so okay.
She would see him again soon.
They would both make sure of that.
Maybe happily ever afters were meant for girls like Moira after all.