Chapter 20
Claire
I pulled up to the Walkers’ house too fast and braked harder than I should have. There were already cars lining the street, neighbors, family friends, people drawn by fear and confusion. The front door was open.
Sheriff June’s cruiser was parked at an angle near the driveway.
The moment I saw her, something inside me loosened.
June stood on the front porch, her uniform neat, posture steady. She had one hand resting lightly on Emma’s shoulder, her body angled toward her but her attention sharp, alert. She looked exactly like who you wanted in a moment like this, calm, focused, completely in control.
Off duty, June was a friend. Someone you ran into at the store, someone who laughed easily, who remembered birthdays. On duty, she was something else entirely. Competent. Clear-headed. The kind of person who made chaos feel manageable just by being present.
Seeing her there helped. Just a little.
June looked up when she saw me and gave a small nod.
“Claire,” she said. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“What’s happening?” I asked, already walking toward them.
Emma looked wrecked. Her eyes were red and swollen, her face pale. She clutched her arms around herself like she was trying to stay upright by force alone.
June spoke calmly. “We’ve issued an Amber Alert. Every available officer is out looking for Lily. We’re checking cameras, talking to neighbors. We’re covering everything.”
Emma nodded shakily beside her.
“She’ll be found,” June added, her voice steady. “We’re doing everything we can.”
I swallowed and nodded back.
“Thank you,” I said. And I meant it.
June squeezed Emma’s shoulder once more and then turned slightly back to her, continuing to ask questions. I stepped away. I couldn’t stand there listening. I needed to see Ethan.
I went inside.
The house felt wrong. Too quiet, too still. Like it was holding its breath.
Ethan stood in the living room, pacing. His hair was a mess. His eyes were red. He looked like he hadn’t slept at all.
“Ethan,” I said.
He stopped moving and looked at me. Shame hit his face immediately.
“What happened?” I asked. “Tell me.”
He ran a hand through his hair and let out a breath.
“I was talking to my mom,” he said. “This morning. About… about how I didn’t think I was cut out for this. For raising a kid.”
My jaw tightened.
“I told her I didn’t think I was suited for it,” he continued, his voice low. “That I didn’t know what I was doing. That I was overwhelmed.”
I felt something cold settle in my chest.
“And maybe Lily heard us,” he said quietly. “I don’t know. I don’t know if she did.”
He swallowed hard.
“When my mom went to wake her up, when she still hadn’t come out by nine, that’s when we realized she wasn’t in her room. Her backpack was gone.”
My heart started pounding.
“We don’t know if she left on her own,” he said, struggling to get the words out. “Or if she was… taken.”
He had to swallow again to finish.
Something inside me snapped.
I stepped closer to him before I even realized I was moving.
“How dare you,” I said, my voice low. “How dare you.”
He flinched.
“How dare you make her feel so unwanted,” I continued, stepping right into his space, “that she would even think about running away from her own home.”
His eyes filled.
“You haven’t changed,” I said, my voice deadly calm. “Not even a little. Not after all these years.”
He tried to speak. I didn’t let him.
“You know, I was devastated when you cheated on me,” I said. “When you humiliated me. But now? Now I’m grateful.”
He stared at me, stunned.
“I’m grateful I didn’t waste my life raising an immature, irresponsible man-child,” I continued. “Someone who never actually grew up. Someone who’s still scared of responsibility. Someone so selfish he can’t think about anyone but himself.”
His face crumpled.
“You don’t want to take charge of a traumatized little girl by dumping that responsibility on your elderly parents?” I said. “You can’t even put her needs first. She’s brave and precious. And you made her feel like a burden.”
My hands were shaking.
“I can’t look at you right now,” I said. “If I do, I might hit you.”
I turned and walked out before I lost control.
I sat in my car for a moment, gripping the steering wheel, breathing hard.
I was going to look for Lily.
The passenger door opened.
Ethan got in.
His eyes were red. His face was tight. But there was something different there now. Determination.
I didn’t say anything.
I couldn’t waste time arguing with the most stubborn person I had ever met.
I started the car and drove.
I went straight to the school.
Lily loved school. More than most kids. It was the only place she felt normal. Safe.
As I searched the grounds, that heavy feeling settled in my stomach. The kind that made it hard to breathe.
If I didn’t find her, I didn’t know how I would survive it.
When I came back to the car, Ethan was bent over behind it, throwing up.
I stopped and waited.
He wiped his mouth unsteadily and stood there, breathing hard.
I climbed back into the car and waited for him to get in.
The air inside felt thick. Heavy with everything I had said.
I reached into the back seat, grabbed a water bottle, and tossed it to him without looking.
He rinsed his mouth and drank half of it in one long swallow.
Neither of us spoke.
We just drove.
I drove toward the park without saying it out loud, because saying it felt like admitting how little hope I had left.
It was too close to the house. Close enough that the police would have checked it already. Close enough that it felt stupid to even try. But there was nowhere else my mind would let me go.
My stomach churned as we pulled up. Nausea crawled up my throat, sharp and insistent. I rolled the window down even though it was cold.
Ethan sat rigid beside me, silent. He hadn’t said a word since the school. His hands were clenched in his lap, knuckles pale.
I parked and got out.