Sixteen
Logan
It’s not enough. I pace outside the barn, holding a bucket of water and a bag full of toiletries.
Eyes on the lock, I urge myself to calm down before walking inside.
Hayden scratched for a few days, had bites on parts of his body, but remained an insufferable prick.
Wednesday night, I stopped by the local bar where I was told by my friends he’d be.
I never went inside. As soon as I spotted his car, I got out of mine with the jar of bugs in hand.
Lucky for me, no one locks any kind of doors in this town.
No one except me. I’m not so trusting anymore.
The first door I tried opened, and I unleashed half the jar inside, spreading them as evenly as I could between the back and front seats.
Looking over my shoulder the whole time, I screwed the lid back on, and disposed of my gloves and the cheap plastic coat I wore over my clothes.
I dumped everything in the trash, checking myself over before slipping back into my car, and when I saw him exit with some older guy, I drove off.
I didn’t stay to see who he was laughing with and throwing his hands on.
Then this morning I woke up to a text from Jimmy informing me Hayden had nearly got him fired after sending him to the wrong location to treat the wrong house, twice.
I hate the guy. More needs to be done to him. More will be. For now, visualizing him at his desk, barking orders while he bleeds on that pretty face from his own nails will have to suffice for now. It’s a very short fucking now too.
On a deep exhale, I unlock the doors and pick the bucket back up.
No sound or movement comes from up top as I enter and close the door behind me.
My mom is gone, visiting my aunt again, but I can never be too careful when it comes to my dad.
He hasn’t shown up since he last dropped by unannounced, however, I have gotten more angry texts.
I don’t block him because I enjoy his anger too much, his downfall, losing everything he worked hard for bit by bit.
My mom has continued to stay quiet about him, and I didn’t want to give her a reason to think about all the shit he’s done if I don’t have to.
She’s smiling again. Light fills her face and she giggles at her phone.
I think she’s met someone, but I don’t pry.
She’ll tell me when she’s ready. Unlike me, she’ll eventually talk about the new man in her life.
What’s between me and Blake is just that.
And whatever happened between him and my dad, if it in fact it ever took place, is over.
My dad lost the apartment. That I know for a fact.
My grandma told me. He’s in her spare bedroom but hasn’t been home much.
Must have a new boy toy or is wasting more money he doesn’t have on getting drunk every night.
I don’t care what he does as long as he stays the fuck away from Blake.
As long as they all do. With him always here with me, they have no choice but to.
The bucket has been lowered to the ground, and I switch it out with the one full of water.
Still only piss. He hasn’t exactly had a proper diet since being here.
As I’ve said before, I need him to need me in all ways.
Then my word will be the only one that ever matters, even when I’m not around.
He’ll beg for relief soon. The built-up pressure is already too much for him.
He wiggles in discomfort, hugging his stomach all night.
I’ll help him feel better when he’s ready for me to. Just like with the bath.
Blake blinks his eyes open when I finally make my way up the ladder. I lift the bucket high, setting it down between us, and he quickly sits up when I empty my pockets of biscuits and sausage in a zip-lock bag. I set them in the feeder and nod when he searches my eyes for permission to eat.
“Morning, piglet. Ready for your bath?”
He oinks twice. We’ll need other ways for him to show his enthusiasm—for him to communicate the way pigs do.
A tail perhaps. I peek behind him, my cock perking up as I envision him kneeling the same way he is now, naked and with the plug wagging in his ass.
Fuck. He wanted me to ogle him yesterday and I fought hard not to cave.
It’s hard not to take in every part of him.
More so when he’s partly naked with that perfect ass hanging out of his pants.
The temptation is worse after knowing what he looks like between those fleshy mounds.
What he feels like. I bet he tastes nice too.
I bite the insides of my cheeks. I can’t think about that.
Not when I’m about to bathe him. Not ever.
We can’t cross that line again because all it’ll do is distract me from what I’m trying to accomplish.
He bats his lashes at me as he wraps those juicy lips around a piece of meat, and I ask myself what I’m supposed to be doing again.
“You were hungry, weren’t you? How’s that tummy of yours?
” He frowns, tearing into the biscuit with his teeth next, crumbs falling around his mouth in the most adorable way.
Fuck. This damn guy. It causes my hate for him to fester, creating these irrational thoughts inside my head.
How he makes me want him and how he had me up all night, empathizing with how so many people tore him down in what were supposed to be his safe spaces.
He lit up when I encouraged him to never stop trying to be better—to never stop trying.
I shoved down the pride I felt when he showed me some appreciation, only for it to come back again when he fell into his role without a second thought.
Those pig noises he made kept stirring shit inside me.
Him being so good for me. This is all for me too.
Him on all fours only using his mouth to eat while only oinking in response.
Yeah, that tail will be the perfect addition.
“Not so good, huh?” I finally say, adjusting the voice changer under my mask.
Swallowing hard, he lowers his head, ignoring my gaze, and I tug at his chin, forcing his eyes back on mine. “We’ll give it a couple more days. We don’t want you getting more backed up than you already are.”
He chews on his lips and I wipe at the sauce stain on his cheek. “Such a messy piglet. Food all over your face and kept there for days. You need help getting clean?”
Looking away, he oinks once, rocking his body forward, and then he oinks again.
A smile is plastered on my face. “Yeah, you do. Don’t worry. I’m here to do just that, and I’ll be here whenever you’re unable to do something on your own.”
Grunting sounds come from his mouth and he rubs his head against my leg, brushing his cheek over my jeans.
Another way to show me appreciation. I don’t mind this one either.
Arm extended, I pet the center of his head, envisioning wiggly ears on either side of my fingers. Pink, to match the rest of him.
“If you’re done eating, I can start helping you get undressed.” I gesture to the two small pieces of bread left, and he sits back on his knees with his hands staying on the ground in front of him.
“I’ll take that as a yes. Don’t want the water to get cold. I filled the bucket with hot water for a reason. To give us time for any delays.”
A soft snort leaves his mouth and I smile, digging my nails into my thighs to keep from petting him again.
I took my glove off yesterday. It was stupid but somehow it earned me more of his trust. It was me revealing a hidden part of myself, showing a little vulnerability so he didn’t feel alone.
He ate it up, feeling safe enough to reveal more of himself.
Or was it more lies? Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice .
. . well, I won’t let that fucking happen.
Blake wiggles his ass on the floor, and I make a note to purchase a tail as soon as tonight when I get out of work.
Dammit, I almost forgot I have a job to get to.
It’s why I got up so early. The sun isn’t out yet, and he keeps looking at the windows as if searching for it.
I’ve entered the barn at the same time every day, except for this morning.
He seems so thrown off by it. Then it dawns on me.
It’s how he keeps track of time and probably the days.
I’m leaning over him, stripping him of his shirt, and he lifts his hips when I get to his pants.
I undo the front and yank them down with his underwear, and he tilts from side to side, getting on all fours again to allow me to drag them over his feet.
His eyes are on me the whole time, his body shivering.
It’s not cold. He’s nervous. A part of him usually shakes when he is.
I need to stop thinking I know him when I only know what he shows me.
He’s a pretender. A good one. Might not even be aware when he’s doing it anymore because it’s grown so natural for him.
“You can stay as you are or stand up if you’d like.”
He doesn’t move. With steady hands, I grab a washcloth from the bag and wet it in the bucket.
Grabbing the bottle of soap, I squirt some onto the soft material and rub it down his back.
Arching, his head falls back, and he mewls the more I ring warm water over his skin.
Dripping with water, I run the cloth around his slender neck and wash his face.
His eyes are shut, and I wash around them and travel down to the front of his neck, to his chest. Then I go lower, to his stomach, creating circles around his belly button before returning to his chest to wipe around his pebbling nipples.
He really is stunning. His skin is so smooth looking and blemish free.
All except for the small freckle above the cleft of his ass.
My lips twitch to kiss him there. No. This isn’t why he’s here.
This is where I messed up last time. Taking more than I was supposed to. Getting so close I nearly lost my way.
“I need you to show me how.”
From time to time, those words will randomly ring in my ears and I grow angry all over again.
He really will mean them. So much so, he’ll anguish in pain when I can’t be here.
I’ll sweep in, putting him back together before coercing more tears from him.
Lather, rinse, repeat. He’ll feel himself slipping away anytime he’s alone, and I’ll step through that door, appearing as his savior.
I move to his legs next, dipping the towel back in the bucket and working on his thighs.
I clean his feet and use a second washcloth to dab around his groin area.
His back extends again and a noise crawls up his throat as I drag the towel up the base of his cock.
Wrapping the towel around his shaft, I slide my hand up and down.
I can’t stop. He mewls, rolling his hips.
I’m lost in a trance of his responses and how he chases my movements.
Stop. I have to stop. But I keep going, slipping my glove off.
Skin touches skin and buzzing sensations scatter between us.
He’s a quivering mess, eyes fluttering shut and mouth parting.
I stroke him hard, my palm and his cock creating slapping sounds.
After shaking off my other glove, I shove my hand in the water and gather soap on my fingers.
My hand moves slowly on his cock, his hips tensing when I lather soap between the crease of his ass.
I tease his outer walls before brushing over his twitching hole.
He convulses, falling forward, and I catch him with one arm.
Pieces of hay underneath him are shiny with his cum.
My mouth salivates, filling more with saliva when I spread his cheeks to rinse his hole by wringing the wash cloth.
With heavy breaths, he relaxes against me, slumping more forward.
The towel in the bag is a bit of a reach with how I’m having to hold him.
When I finally reach it, I wrap the large towel around his flushed body.
“It’s okay, piglet. You’re okay. You got a little excited during bath time, huh?
I didn’t want to leave you like that. You don’t need another reason to be uncomfortable. ”
His panting slows and I hold him to me, rubbing his back. Hazy blue eyes blink up at me as I sweep strands of wet hair from his forehead. “You did really well during your bath. When I left last night too. Such a good piglet.”
His face is elated, his smile dreamy, as he falls asleep in my arms. I’ll have to decrease the amount of drugs I add to his water.
He’s sleeping way too much, and I want him to have more strength than he has.
I want him weaker than me but not completely helpless.
Although I won’t mind if that’s the case some days.
When it’s really cold, he’ll struggle to turn on the heater or not be able to scoot close enough to the warmth, and it’s never a bad thing for him to need me more.
His snores cover the silence stretching between us and I tuck him inside the blanket.
I take advantage of him sleeping and sweep out all the hay.
He stirs a little when I set him on the spare twin mattress we use for guests.
There’s a clean fitted sheet clinging to it, and I set a pillow under his head before changing out the dirty blanket for a fresh, thicker one.
We’ll see how thankful he is for his new human privileges when I get home from work tonight.
It’s Friday, so I’ll have the next two days off to tend to him more.
With one last look at Blake, I gather everything I don’t plan to leave in here and exit the barn.
The sun is setting and I’m running behind, so I shower quickly.
My uniform is hanging on a hook on my closet door, my shoes waiting for me in the entryway of the house when I’m getting ready to walk out the door.
I check the camera in my car before I leave the driveway, and again when I reach the academy parking lot.
He hasn’t woken yet, snuggled so comfortably in the blankets, and that’s the most relaxed I’ve seen him.
The special K helped him sleep but it didn’t stop all his restlessness.
Feeling cared for and important did. For him, it’s about more than being wanted.
It’s why he’s never been satisfied when experiencing that from others.
He’ll see that he can only get more of that with one person.
I can give him everything while also taking away so much without him realizing.