Twenty
Logan
I shut the engine off as soon as I’m parked in my driveway.
Going way over the speed limit, I drove home as fast as I could after looking at the video footage of my dad showing up at the house.
He was circling the barn, looking through the windows and trying to get in anyway he could.
I wasn’t able to have my phone with me at the academy, so didn’t see what was going on until after it already happened.
There are no missed calls from my dad, so I’m hoping that means he didn’t get inside and see Blake.
At least I’m assuming he didn’t. I swing the door open and step outside, looking around me to make sure no one’s around.
My mom is staying with a friend again, one she won’t tell me much about, but as long as she’s happy wherever she is, that’s all that matters to me.
Plus, her being gone means less risk of her finding out about what I’m hiding from her.
I don’t plan on bringing him into the house again anytime soon, but I worry he’ll be too loud whenever she’s close by or she’ll ask why I spend so much time in there.
It’s only a matter of time before she comes out here to check on me.
My boots kick the dirt as I pound them into the ground, making a beeline for the double wooden doors that appear closed. The lock hasn’t been picked and the chain is still tightly wrapped around the door handles. He didn’t get in.
I laugh, shaking my head at myself. Fuck.
That was a close one. It keeps getting closer too.
I can’t keep Blake here forever, but I don’t know where else to move him to.
My mom keeps talking about moving out to where my aunt lives for a new start, and maybe if she does, my dad will have no reason to keep coming here.
Or will he only come here more, hating that she left the house to me when I’m the last person he wants owning it?
I reach inside my shoe and slide one of the keys on the ring into the lock, then shove it back under my foot when the doors are open. I rush inside a close it behind me, sliding a wooden board through the inside handles. My dad hasn’t been back since this morning, but that doesn’t mean he won’t be.
“Hello?” I call out, tugging a mask on, and shuffling comes from the loft. I look up at the moving figure and turn on my voice changer.
The ladder shakes as I stomp my way up it and Blake backs up on the mattress blinking his eyes. He looks half asleep with messy hair and soot on his cheek. I hate how adorable he is right now. How adorable he is every time he first wakes up or gets sleepy.
“Hi,” he says.
“Hi,” I greet him again. “Have a good rest today?”
He nods, eyes bouncing around me. “There was a man here.”
“Yeah,” I grunt out. “It was a confused old neighbor who gets drunk and wanders to the wrong house sometimes. You don’t have to worry about him.”
“My dad used to get drunk and wander into the wrong room sometimes. He’d blame me whenever he confused me for my mom like I was the one who made the mistake.”
My heart aches. “That’s . . . your father is a prick. And you want to go back there?”
“I . . .” He looks distraught, staring at his shaking hands. “I don’t know where else I would go when you think it’s time to set me free.”
“You don’t have any other family?” I ask when I already know the answer.
He shakes his head, looking past me, completely deflated.
“What about a friend with a spare bedroom or couch?”
“Maybe. I don’t know.”
I bet he does. He always has so many people around him all the time.
Not here, though. Here he only has me. He only needs me.
I thought he was starting to understand that when he trusted me to get him clean and asked me to get him off in the bathtub.
Then he tried to pull a fast one the minute I dozed off.
I can’t let my guard down like that again. I can’t.
“Is it dinner time yet?” His eyes fall to his stomach, and that’s when the bottle of water clutched in his hand becomes more evident.
“Almost. I have to go make it.”
“What about the leftovers?”
“They’re in the fridge in the house. I can heat them up and you can eat your orange chicken while I eat something else.”
“Will you read to me afterwards? The story was getting interesting before I fell asleep.”
I smile. “Sure. Do you remember what part we were on before you passed out?”
His lips fold inward. “Kind of. You can show me the last two pages and I’m sure I’ll recognize it.”
“Sure. Or I can read the second chapter over again.”
He thinks for a beat and his blanket slides halfway down him. “Yeah, okay. That works too.”
“I’m going to go get our food. Did you want something to drink aside from water?”
His lips twist. “Diet Coke?”
“I don’t have any, but I need to put in a grocery order today and I’ll add it to the list. How about tea or Sprite?”
“Sprite.”
“You got it,” I quip and spin around.
I’m halfway down the ladder when he says, “What’s your name?”
My hands tighten around the wood. “Why do you need to know that?”
“It doesn’t need to be your real name. I . . . it would just be nice to have something to call you.”
I blow out a breath, racking my brain for a good answer. “How about T?” T is the first initial of my middle name, Tyler. It’s also my Dad’s first name.
“T,” he says, as if testing it on his lips.
“Yeah. T.”
“Is it too much to ask what it stands for?”
I bite back a laugh, rolling my eyes. “Yes. I’ll be back. Try to straighten out your area while I’m gone. It’s looking like a mess up here.” I carry on down the ladder and he doesn’t stop me from leaving again. I chain and lock the doors before going inside the house.
I can’t wait until the weekend so I can be here to watch for my dad, chasing him off before he can so much as touch the barn doors.
Two more days. I don’t know if my mom will be back by then or not, and I can’t believe I’m thinking about what it would be like to read to Blake on the couch or listen to music with him while he’s cuffed to one of the chairs and I’m making dinner.
He can’t come inside again. At least not yet. Not until I’m sure he won’t try to run and is no longer thinking about being anywhere else but with me.
It’s only been two weeks and he’s already better here.
He hasn’t shown an ounce of entitlement and hasn’t mentioned Hayden or his other friends once.
I asked if he had anyone he could stay with when I let him go, and he said maybe without elaborating.
He thinks I’m letting him go and that I plan to in time, but the more I think about it, the less ideal it sounds.
I like him here with me and how he is when it’s only us.
He’s better behaved and mannered here. He doesn’t expect more than he’s earned and doesn’t ask for too much with his very modest requests.
Blake could have asked for anything, but he only wanted books and music.
I wasn’t expecting those answers from him, and since I wasn’t, I kept pushing to give him more.
He didn’t ask for the bubble bath, but I felt he earned it anyway, and he had a look of gratitude on his face when I set him down in the water, appearing so serene when I washed his hair after he fell apart in front of me from the orgasm I gave him.
The memory of the sounds he made has my cock perking up as I shove his food in the microwave.
I adjust myself in my pants and pull off my hoodie, feeling overheated in my kitchen.
More warmth spills inside me when I remember how his eyes tilted back and his thighs shook around my hands.
The microwave beeps and I let his food cool while I shove a microwave dinner in there next.
They aren’t my favorite, but I’m too tired to cook a whole meal for one person.
I ate all my food after taking him back to the barn last night, so I have to settle for something less tasty now.
Chicken fried steak and mashed potatoes.
It’ll do. I’ve eaten worse, and I was the one who chose that myself on my last trip to the store.
I’ve been stopping at a nearby sandwich shop on my lunch breaks, but I don’t have the money to always do that.
I change out of my uniform as my food heats up, putting on something more casual.
Navy sweats and a plain black long-sleeve shirt.
I need all my tattoos covered. I don’t want to give him anything that can be linked to me.
There’s enough there as it is. The farm, the things I like, and the way I joke with him.
My food is ready when I return to the kitchen. I shove a can of Sprite in one pocket and a bottle of Heineken in the other before gathering our food in my hands. I’ve carried more up that ladder before, so I have enough confidence that I’ll get all this up there too.
I set my food on his to-go container, pressing my chin on top as I open and shut the front door to the house behind me.
I keep everything in one arm and hand as I make my way back to my little piglet.
Yeah, he’s mine. Might as well accept it now instead of spending more time being in denial than I already have.
It would have been easier if I put my mask on before picking up the food, but of course I didn’t consider that until now.
I have too much other shit on my mind, like wondering if Blake is going to need help coming again. He’s clearly gone a while without it.
Did he really not come when I told him not to? Was he really planning on waiting until he met me Saturday at the tower? There’s no way for me to find out the answer without raising suspicion, so I’ll probably never really know.
I reach the loft, tugging on my mask to cover all of my neck after placing everything on the small table. Blake crawls toward me, stopping halfway to look at me for approval to keep going. I nod while smiling.
“Go ahead and sit where you want.”
“You’re going to eat with me again?” He shifts closer to the table, tugging his food to him.
“Do you want me to?”