Chapter 37 #2
His hands slide into my hair and I press closer, needing to eliminate every inch of space between us. We stumble toward the bedroom, mouths never breaking apart, hands pulling at clothes with desperate urgency. We don't make it far before my back hits the hallway wall.
"I need you," he says against my mouth.
"Then take me."
We make it to his bedroom somehow. Moonlight streams through the window, casting everything in silver. Once we're there, beside his bed, everything slows.
He reaches for the hem of my shirt, pulls it off deliberately. His eyes never leave mine as he removes each piece until I'm standing bare in front of him. Vulnerable in a way I haven't let myself be in years.
I reach for his shirt. He lets me pull it over his head, lets my hands map his chest, his shoulders. His belt. His jeans. Until we're both standing there with nothing between us.
"I love you."
The words fall between us and everything stops.
He goes completely still, hands frozen on my hips. His eyes search mine like he's afraid to believe it.
It's the first time I've said it out loud. The first time I've let myself.
"I should have said it five years ago," I whisper, voice breaking. "I should have said it instead of running. I should have—"
"Say it again." His voice is wrecked.
"I love you, Eli."
His eyes close. When they open again, they're wet.
His hands cup my face. "Again."
"I love you."
He presses his forehead to mine, breathing unsteady, and for a moment neither of us moves. Just standing there in the moonlight with five years of unsaid things finally out in the open.
"I've loved you since we were kids," he says quietly.
"Even when I was trying not to. Even when it hurt.
" His thumbs brush my cheekbones. "I drove to Denver and watched you walk out of your building and told myself you were happy.
That you'd made the right call. I got back in my truck and spent five years trying to believe that.
" His voice cracks. "You were never supposed to come back.
And you did. And you're still here, standing in front of me scared half to death, and you stayed anyway.
" He pulls back just enough to look at me, eyes raw and certain.
"That's everything, Hazel. That's the whole thing. "
I can't speak. My throat is too tight. I pull him back to me instead.
He kisses me like I'm something precious. Something he's afraid might disappear. His hands map my body like he's relearning every curve, every place that makes me shiver.
His mouth finds my neck, my collarbone, the hollow of my throat. Taking his time. But I can feel the urgency underneath. The restraint he's barely holding onto.
My hands tangle in his hair, pulling him back up to me. "Tell me what you need."
"You." His voice is rough, wrecked. "Just you."
The reverence tips into fire.
His mouth crashes into mine, harder this time. Claiming. His hands grip my hips, thumbs pressing into the hollow just above my hip bones. I arch against him, needing more, needing everything.
He walks me backward until my knees hit the bed and we go down together, a tangle of hands and breath and five years of wanting finally given permission. When he pulls back to look at me — really look, chest heaving, eyes dark — something in his expression makes me go still.
He's not rushing. Not anymore.
He takes his time. One hand smoothing up my side. His mouth finding mine again, slower now. Like he's reminding both of us that we have time. That I'm not going anywhere.
When he finally enters me, we both stop.
Foreheads pressed together. Breathing the same air. The sensation is overwhelming — too much and not enough all at once.
"Mine," he says, voice rough.
"Yours." I move against him, pulling him deeper. "I'm yours."
He starts to move and I meet him stroke for stroke. The rhythm builds slow at first, deliberate, like he's savoring every second. But it doesn't stay slow.
His hands grip tighter. My nails drag down his back. His mouth finds my neck, my shoulder, teeth grazing skin.
"Don't stop," I gasp.
He shifts his weight, catching both my wrists in one hand and pinning them above my head. His other hand cups my jaw, tilting my face up.
"Look at me."
I open my eyes. Meet his. The intensity there steals my breath.
"I need you to see me," he says, voice strained. "Need you to know who you're with."
"I know." My voice breaks. "I know exactly who you are."
The rhythm builds faster. Harder. My wrists flex against his grip but he holds firm, keeping me present, keeping me here with him.
"I love you," I gasp between breaths.
"I love you too."
The pleasure coils tighter until I can't hold it anymore. I break apart beneath him, his name tearing from my throat. He releases my wrists and I wrap my arms around him, pulling him closer as the waves crash through me.
He follows seconds later, my name breaking from him like a prayer. His whole body shakes with it. Both of us holding tight, neither willing to let go.
Afterward, we don't let go. Stay tangled together, breathing hard, hearts beating against each other.
I rest my head on his chest. His fingers trace lazy patterns on my shoulder. The quiet settles around us, comfortable and warm.
After a while he says, "Stay here. Move in with me."
I lift my head to look at him. "What?"
"We've waited our whole lives." No hesitation. Like it's already decided. "I'm not waiting anymore."
A smile tugs at my mouth. "Okay."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. Okay."
His arms tighten around me. His lips brush my temple.
Outside, the ranch is dark and quiet. Inside, we're building something new. The moonlight stretches silver across the bed, the floor, the future neither of us is running from anymore.
I press closer and close my eyes.
Finally home.