Chapter 1 #2
After a while, maintaining a loyalty for this family was like a general anesthetic for me, and it was to a degree chloroform couldn’t even compete with.
Sometimes it was pitiful to be party to my father grasping onto any shred of hope he was given.
Hope that our family would be perceived as high society.
Hope that we would be among those he liked to believe lived a far less stressful life.
However, I didn’t think he was right. I was sure it came with its benefits, but the grass was often more burned on the other side than lusciously green.
Securing my purse on my shoulder, I walked away from the wall, placing a hand in the pocket of my black pants, the sleeves of my beige top taking the breeze.
It was a beautiful day that allowed me to put together an ensemble that matched perfectly.
Some things, when not forced, came together seamlessly.
I didn’t understand the point in forcing things.
Maybe that was why I wasn’t engaged at this stage.
Maybe that was why I wasn’t worried. Apparently, my lackadaisical approach only fed my father’s interests, though.
He had an incredible ability to make everything work for him. Not much unlike myself.
“Get in the car.” The harshness of his tone had the blood pumping in my ears, disappointment seeping throughout.
Despite what I wanted for myself, this was all I believed I’d ever have.
Doing what was expected of me was time-consuming.
Forget how I had been told I didn’t need a steady paycheck, so a job would serve as nothing more than answering to someone with the foresight to build a legacy I was merely helping with.
Forget asking me if shopping and networking and doing my father’s bidding was how I saw things going for me.
I had graduated high school, and everything was mapped out.
College was never in the equation. It didn’t need to be.
Even my mother was fixated on future prospects, making sure I was taken care of in a way that depending on myself wouldn’t have accomplished, at least not in her mind.
Both of them practically squawked when I had announced my brilliant idea of building a social media presence to become an influencer.
It was something neither of them understood nor cared to understand.
They wanted a sure thing. Security in the inner circle of the elite world.
We did well for ourselves because my father had made sure of it, but we would never be able to compete with generational wealth. Not the type of wealth the Delucas possessed.
As soon as I got in the car, it felt like I was in a space shuttle with the door open, my oxygen supply reducing at a rapid rate.
He may have been near retirement age, but he was spry, fit, and sported a scowl with an intensity that made men quake and me shrink.
With one glance, he reminded me of my place.
I was to act the part. I was his daughter, and I’d be wise to remember that.
Polite, careful, appreciative. That was all I was expected to be.
Anything else was viewed as disrespectful, and it was always met with disapproval.
Forcing a smile, I kept my eyes trained on him. “Have you ever considered taking up golf lessons? Just think about how you would finally be getting some real use out of our country club membership.”
Of course, I left out how I was bringing this up for selfish reasons. If he was there, he couldn’t possibly be following me around, bothering me about my marital status or anything else for that matter.
“Nice stunt you pulled back there. Don’t try it again,” he said, seriousness edging his voice, and heat prickling in his eyes.
“Oh, right, like you didn’t see that coming,” I said now that we were sheltered from prying eyes, and ears, inside the car.
“What did you expect from me?” I would have thought it was the appropriate reaction after what he had sprung on me.
Even as an adult, he meticulously crafted the responses he wanted from me, expecting his to be the only ones that came to pass.
But I wasn’t in his head, and he only cared to think about his side of things and how it all suited him.
Shaking my head, I took a deep breath and pressed my head back without regard for how close the headrest was.
A ping of pain shot through my head, hitting my eyes before I shut them momentarily.
Why even bother rubbing it? This was merely another thing we could file under collateral damage.
Only, this time it was credited to sitting through another transactional meeting with a man who had a funny way of showing his parental love.
“He’s rich and powerful and has a standing in this city.
His last name pretty much guarantees that.
” His expression softened as he seemed to practically beam with the information.
Unlike him, I didn’t need my fiancé to be on the thirty under thirty list. I didn’t even need him to have substantial tie-ins with a global conglomerate.
I didn’t need to sign a prenuptial agreement as well as a contract regarding shares to an empire.
“I’m giving you everything.” No, he was giving himself a son-in-law who would give him everything.
Any pride that was engulfing him wasn’t enough to tango with the abhorrence consuming me.
My spine stiffened against the seat. “That’s important to you, not me.
” Practically the largest understatement of the century, but still.
The car may have been moving, but I felt stuck in the same position as I always was.
“Well, it should be. You had a thousand opportunities to go after one of those Deluca men, and you never took it. At some point, you do need to grow up.” His jaw was set in place, his hands in his lap as he clasped his fingers together.
It would have been asking too much for him to look at me.
Holding someone’s gaze was a matter of respect, and he had made it abundantly clear he lacked that when it came to me and for no reason besides the fact that I preferred to fight the inevitable as much as possible.
Which was going against the grain of everything he crafted, all his principles.
Ice ran through my veins, threatening to freeze me to death. “And, what, growing up means entering into an arranged marriage?” I shifted my foot, pressing the heel of my pump against the carpeted floor, digging it in as he spoke.
“No.” My head snapped toward him against my better judgment.
“It means understanding when it’s time to take care of your future and the future of the people around you.
” Naturally. For a second there, he had me thinking he understood something that was beyond the sound of his own voice.
Unless it slipped past his lips, he wanted to know nothing of it.
“Isn’t that what I’m always doing?” Even with the underlying anger there, lingering, I still didn’t allow myself to exude as much of it as I could have. I was holding back the full force of my hostility toward the situation.