Lacey
8.
In a family portrait, we would make a good couple I’m sure. Well, I would’ve been sure in the beginning of our relationship. I know better now, I’m not pretty enough for Adrian Sterling. He presents me as if I am, but when we’re alone he tells me I’m too fat, my skin is too light, my boobs should be bigger, my arms not so big. That’s the reason we didn’t take too many pictures in our relationship. Barely any, in fact.
I’m glad I don’t have anything like that to look at, that I don’t have anything I need to delete or burn in order to forget him. Forgetting him and the thousands of times he made me feel small is actually pretty easy, and I don’t know if I can thank another cop for that or if it’s because I tried to forget our relationship a million times before. I broke up with him a couple of times actually, we always got back together but I won’t be coming back to Adrian this time, never in a million years.
He smiles at me for just a moment. It should be sweet, a sweet smile from Adrian directed at me as the people in front of us chatter away, but I don’t recognize anything sweet about him anymore. He broke my heart and this will be the last time we will be together. He wraps me in his arms, holds me a little tighter when he notices that I’m not my usual tiny self that tries to smile back, or be nice. Fuck nice, I’m angry that I gave him my time today and that I ever gave him my heart and body. Fuck him.
I would rather give my body to Koa. I think about the way he made me feel yesterday and the day before that. I know I’m a bad person for having these feelings, but I can’t help but close my eyes and let the image of him make me giddy with excitement. I’m glad he’s not here. It’s good to know that he won’t see me with Adrian. And it’s good that I won’t see his face, or else I would probably melt like a little puddle on the ground.
“It’s a mess, really.” Adrian’s boss pulls me out of my thoughts and back to the conversation. “We desperately need someone to help out around the office, the paperwork and organizing shit takes up so much of my energy, I don’t have any time left for my Belinda,” Captain Daniel Campbell says. A big crease forms on his red, sweaty forehead as he holds his wife in his arms, adoration for her all over his face.
“How many hours a week?” I ask before I get too shy to. I really need another job and I’m over bartending and waiting tables.
“You looking for a job, sweetheart?” Campbell asks, the crease slowly disappearing.
I nod my head yes, not sure what I’m getting myself into.
“I have school three times a week, but I’m free the rest of the time. I could work at least two full days. That’s what I did at my other jobs,” I tell him, getting my hopes up.
Organizing shit, doing paperwork, that’s everything I love to do. Bri hates me for it, but I’m a neat freak.
“But honey, you can’t do office stuff, all you did was work in a restaurant,” Adrian says, gripping my hip a little harder, almost to the point of bruising.
Shit.I would have to see him more often again. And I bet he is right, I’m not a police officer, I never went to the academy. This was a stupid idea.
“That’s no problem for me if you’re interested, Lacey?” Daniel questions, looking at me with hopeful eyes. “You could come in whenever you like, and I would pay you per hour. We’re open 24/7, so whenever you’re free,” he says, laughing.
I grin, he seems to be a nice man.
“I’m sure you will get that other job you applied for,” Adrian starts back up again.
He pinches my hip, probably leaving another purple bruise, and I’m so over it. I want to slap his hand away but I don’t want to embarrass myself in front of my potential new boss, so I try to be as calm as I can and do something I will most likely regret.
“Actually I haven’t applied for another job and I would love to work for you Mr. Campbell. I’m really good at organizing and I have plenty of experience working myself through documents and helping out with bills and tax issues from previous jobs in clubs and restaurants. They always came to me if there was a paperwork-related problem,” I tell him, pulling Adrian’s hand off of my hip.
I’m so over his bullshit. We’re not together anymore. He can’t push me around like he used to!
“So you’re saying yes? Fantastic! Are you free on Monday to come to the office to get to know your way around? I think I can muster up a contract by then.”
I smile really big, genuinely excited, and take his hand when he offers his in excitement as if he wants to complete this deal.
“Yes, I actually am free Monday.”
“Perfect. Be there around nine and I will show you everything.”
I shake his hand, still smiling. “I’ll be there,” I tell him.
“Very good. How about you get yourself something to eat. Shaun over there grills the best steaks,” he says, pointing over to the flaming grill, where a huge guy is flipping meat.
Adrian nods his head shortly and pulls my underarm a little roughly, shoving me as far away from his boss as he can.
“Are you fucking dumb, Lacey?” he asks in his scary calm voice. Oh hello, there he is again.Thank god I got rid of him…
“Don’t you understand that this is a stupid idea?” he asks, a wild storm brewing behind his blue eyes.
“No?” I reply, a bit angry but still very quietly.
“You can’t work where I work! You know that all of these bastards won’t wait a second to chase after your ass!”
I shake my head and almost laugh in his face. “Adrian. I will make this clear for you again. We’re not together anymore. Who does what with my ass is none of your business.”
He’s taken aback. I would talk back to him in the past. Not often but he knows when he stepped over a line and I’m pissed. And it makes him even angrier and hurtful. The mean glimmer I know all too well coming back into his baby blues.
“Not that there’s a big chance someone will want a fat chick like you. But if I can’t have you, Lacey, then I swear to you no one fucking will!” he snarls angrily.
I get a little scared he will act on his feelings and smack me around again. He’s angrier than the night I left his apartment and he hit me then. I don’t know what he is capable of in this state of mind. I take a small step back, looking around the chief’s backyard. It’s not too big, but nicely decorated. It’s around seveno’clock, the sun is starting to set and won’t be shining down on us for too long. It’s a warm, September afternoon and I’m wearing a flirty short dress with thin spaghetti straps that shows a lot of cleavage. I feel sexy and confident. I don’t want to feel like shit again. Not anymore.
“It’s over Adrian, get over it,” I tell him, but he won’t have it.
He takes my wrist, the fake diamond studded heart on my silver bracelet boring itself in my flesh.
“You little bitch,” he starts, pulling me closer to him, his other hand pulling my hair over my shoulder and kissing my neck.
I look frantically to my left and right. People wave at us, ignore us, or smile in our direction. For others we probably look like a cozy sweet couple. But the reality is that my ex-boyfriend is violating me in a backyard full of cops, some even still in uniform, and I’m scared. Would they help me if they knew? Or would they cover for him? I know he’s friends with a lot of people. I’m sure Adrian and the people here have the means to avoid being brought to justice.
“You’re a piece of nothing, an ugly fat bitch whose pussy can’t fuck properly. You think some other cop will fuck your kinky cop loving cunt? If you want to get fucked you come to me, do you understand?” he says in my ear. “And you will go over to Daniel right this fucking second and tell him you’re really sorry but your stupid brain already forgot that you got offered another amazing job and can’t come work for us!”
I shiver and I’m sure I’m white as a ghost. I rethink his words and my decision. It isn’t a great idea to work near him. He will never let me off the hook this easily. He never did when we broke up before, but I have a feeling this time he’s even worse. It’s as if he hit a point of no return by hitting me in the face.
“Sterling!” an angelic, deep voice sings right in front of us, and I couldn’t be more thankful for this distraction because Adrian lets me off the hook.
I know it’s not over but at least for the time being I’m free. I rub my arm with my free hand and look up to blink directly into the eyes of the two sexiest men alive: Ledger Hyde and Koa Maverick. Fuck…