Chapter 39 #2
I’m not surprised Keegan has never mentioned my little fuck doll to her.
I imagine he must often feel the pangs of temptation to weaponize this situation against me, to paint me as some obsessed freak in her mind.
Not that I hadn’t been… Still am, I suppose…
Knowing he hasn’t confirms what I’ve suspected all along…
Relishing in this small triumph, I fight the devious urge to grin.
“Well?” Vanna presses. “Are you going to answer me?” My lack of response seems to agitate her, and she lets out a sigh of frustration. “You promised me honesty. Do you remember that?”
“I do.”
“I’m waiting.”
“An ex.” How else can I describe her?
Vanna blinks before her brows furrow. “You called her Puppet?”
“A term of endearment.” Technically…
“Why would they want me to ask you about your ex? Did you do something to her?”
Fuck… “Rough breakup.” I pull another drag, glancing at her briefly. She crosses her arms and shifts uneasily in her boots.
“When you say rough …” Vanna begins, and I turn to face her head-on. “You aren’t implying you were violent with her…are you?”
“At the time of our breakup?”
Her eyes widen a bit at my inquiry, and her posture goes slightly rigid.
“Our breakup was not amicable… Nor is it anything I wish to rehash. I wanted out. She didn’t. If you’re worried as to whether or not I beat her , no. In my opinion, I did not.”
“ In your opinion?”
“During our times together…we… dabbled a bit.”
“Dabbled in what?”
I search her expression more intently, wondering how vanilla her relationship with Keegan might be beyond what I’ve witnessed myself. He is a passionate, powerful lover… But I’ve never witnessed his hands around her throat…his belt secured around her wrists…
“Spanking. Asphyxiation. Restraints…”
“ Oh…” Vanna’s gaze immediately drops to the pavement.
“Shall I go on?”
“ No… As long as you were both consenting adults,” she shrugs awkwardly. “I mean, I don’t need those details if…”
“Those women don’t know me, Vanna. Their version of events is just that. Their version . Via the mouth of a disgruntled ex, no less. I deserve a fairer trial than this, no?”
“You’re right… I’m sorry I asked.”
“ Don’t mention it ,” I wink at her as the sound of Keegan’s approaching motorcycle echoes off the buildings down the street. “I’m sure the good warden would be less than thrilled to know you’ve inquired about my sex life… Fear not. It’s our little secret.”
She lets out an uncomfortable little scoff, concurring without words.
We both watch Keegan dismount and cross the lot to her. He snakes an arm around her waist and plants a territorial kiss upon her lips, always eager to shove his claim on her in my face. Then he spares me a disdainful glance.
“Feel free to take off,” he mutters.
“We have a few new patrons tonight,” Vanna says in a chipper tone laced with mounting anxiety.
“Oh yeah?” he asks.
“Members of the Steel Vixens MC… I can’t decide if they’re here for a few drinks or to start trouble,” she says, nodding at me. A slick smile etches across Keegan’s face. “They don’t seem to like Legion very much.”
“In that case, their next round is on the house,” Keegan jokes.
“Is that wise, oh fearless leader?” I needle him back. “I was under the impression you were under some financial hardship?”
“And I thought I told you to get the fuck out of here?”
“Oh, but I’ve come to collect.”
“ Collect?” Vanna asks.
“You still owe me a dance… or two .”
Keegan stiffens beside her while I pull the last drag from my cigarette. Did he honestly think I’d forgotten, or that I would willfully allow such an opportunity to slip through my grasp?
“Alright,” Vanna sighs. “A deal is a deal. Why don’t you pick a song to play before we dance? That way, you can give me a heads up when it comes on in case I’m busy with patrons.”
Exhaling the smoke in Keegan’s direction, I squeeze off the cherry and toss the butt into the receptacle behind him.
“As you wish… How about Clapton’s song, Layla…
” I slide my eyes to Keegan in time to see him practically jolt and grip her tighter.
I don’t bother fighting my grin. He got the message.
Our sweet Vanna remains unaware, and I wonder if he’ll spoil my fun, or keep this little jab a secret as well…
“Alright, that’s a long one if I remember correctly,” Vanna innocently replies.
I gesture toward the steel door of the Twisted Throttle, “ Beauty before evil, sweet one.”
Keegan grabs the handle, holding the door open for Vanna. She walks inside, and he shoots me another damning glare.
“ Husband before covetous fiend ,” he growls, entering behind her and allowing the door to slam in my face. I half expect it to lock.
I’m familiar enough with their family routine to know she’ll accompany him to check in on their son again.
The roadhouse isn’t crowded tonight, so there won’t be a long wait for the songs of my choosing to play.
Deciding to give her a little time, I light up again, just as another motorcycle pulls into the lot. A lady rider.
I’ve barely pulled a second drag before the steel door behind me bursts open and someone slams into my back, knocking the cigarette from my grasp.
“ Move, asshole!” the brunette Brooklynite snaps as she storms past me, eager to greet her friend.
I stare at the dying glow of my cigarette against the gravel between my boots.
It’s astonishing, the things people forget about a person when they disappear for a while, or spend a few months playing by the rules of others…
Perhaps a reminder is in order, a lesson in fear. I’ve always been such a good teacher.
T he noise from the bar fades with each step closer to my old club room, where Ace is sleeping. Vanna doesn’t say a word, and I wonder if it’s on purpose or if she’s attempting to avoid another argument about Legion.
When we step into the room, the tension between us eases a bit at the sight of Ace fast asleep in the bed, his little chest rising and falling peacefully.
Vanna bends to adjust his blankets, then gently brushes his hair back from his face, the way she always does to both of us.
“He’s exhausted,” she whispers. “Rosita dropped Mia off with us at the farmstand today, and they both helped me tidy up and pick strawberries. Speaking of, we made mini strawberry shortcakes from scratch after lunch. There are some waiting for you at home in the fridge.”
“Thanks,” I say, keeping my voice low, despite her brief conversation with Legion still burning in my mind. “This better be the last dance, Vanna.”
She hesitates, avoiding my gaze. “I promised him two.”
My jaw tightens. “What inspired this generosity?”
She straightens slowly, finally turning to face me. “He tried to cash in his dance on Beltane… I didn’t think you’d appreciate that…so I bargained my way out of it.”
Another deal with the devil…
When I don’t say anything, she continues with an almost pleading expression in her eyes. “He’s trying to be part of something that doesn’t come easy to him. This MC isn’t what he’s used to… He seems…restless.”
I fold my arms and lean back against the dresser. “Maybe it’s time he moved on.”
She doesn’t answer right away, but she absentmindedly lifts her hand to brush her fingertips across the base of her throat, as if the idea of him leaving distresses her.
The urge to break something begins to rise. “You don’t want him to go,” I say, studying her closely.
Her eyes lift to mine, but she doesn’t deny it. “It’s more complicated than that.”
My guts twist, and I exit the room, taking a few strides down the hall, away from our sleeping son. Has she been so deprived of genuine affection prior to our life together that knowing Legion is in love with her is something she’s come to find comfort in? Validation , even? Jesus fuck…
The door shuts quietly before she’s by my side again. “I’m sorry,” she says, stepping in front of me to halt my progression to the bar. “He’s fragile, Dean… I don’t know what he’ll do if we tell him to go.”
“Are you afraid of him?” I’m afraid to ask the questions I really want to know…
She seems to sense this and grips my hand in hers. “Not of him… For him.”
Vanna always sees the good in people, even when they don’t deserve it.
Hell, especially when they don’t fucking deserve it.
It’s one of the things I love most about her, except when I see it being used against her.
Her soft heart and open soul…she doesn’t realize how evil can fuckin’ smell her kind of empathy, like blood in the water, or spot it like a crack in the foundation it can crawl through…
He noticed. He watches her with those pale eyes like he’s starving, hiding the pickaxe behind his back .
Playing the long game. The quiet one. The tragic past, the scars, the redemption arc he thinks we owe him.
Fuck him and his evil plot to use the way she nurtures things that are broken to his advantage.
I know she sees beauty in ruins… Potential in the fallen…
and still believes people deserve to be whole.
It’s her gift. But it’s also her goddamned blind spot, and he fucking knows it… He uses it…
But Vanna is mine to protect. I’m the fucking hero in her story. Her dark knight. Her Savior. And I always will be… even if it means I have to become the villain temporarily in her eyes…
I lift her hand and press a kiss against it. “I don’t know how much patience I have left, Vanna.”
We part ways upon reentering the Twisted Throttle. Vanna joins Cherry behind the bar, and I cross the room to sit with Viking in his usual spot near the door. Just before I make it to him, I cross paths with another Steel Vixen as she enters the bar.
“Welcome to the Twisted Throttle, doll.” I force a smile, though, if she’s team Fuck Legion , too, she’s more than welcome. The brunette offers me a timid nod and eagerly veers off to join her friends waiting for her at the bar. I take a seat beside Viking and lean back against the bricks.