Sister, Sister
Devon: I’m sorry I left. Did you get my note?
Tara: You mean the penis drawing you left on my mirror using shaving cream?
Devon: I folded your panties for you and put them under the sink.
Tara: Yeah, I found them when I went to get a tampon. Weird choice.
Why’d you bolt?
Devon: Um. It might be normal for you to wake up in a stranger’s bed wearing Agent Provacateur, but alas, I just wasn’t raised that way.
Tara: Ew. It’s La Perla.
You do know that you were comatose by the time that stranger brought you a plate of dessert to check on you when he thought you fell into another wall.
The stranger then came to fetch me to change you into something more comfortable and insisted he sleep on the couch until I told him I do not allow sleep sweat on my couch.
The stranger is taking us to breakfast right now to thank us for last night.
And the stranger was worried about you all morning because he knows you don’t like to travel alone.
Devon: I panicked.
Tara: You don’t say.
You should call him.
Devon: I can’t.
Tara: I know you’re scared. It’s scary.
Devon: You are never scared. You are Xena: Warrior Princess. She-rah of Metropolis. Velma Dinkley.
Tara: Who the fuck is Velma Dinkley?
Devon: We are no longer sisters.
Tara: Anyway…
I’m always scared. Everyday. Give the man a chance.
I love you, nutty sister.
Devon: I love you more. I took the rest of the tiramisu from the fridge.
Tell Marcello I’ll text him later.
Tara: I told him not to give you his number.
Devon: I got his mom’s number, too.
Tara: Stopppppp.