Chapter Nineteen
Lia
If Leo and I were normal people with normal lives, we’d be celebrating our twenty-first birthday at a bar tonight. We’d take shots with friends and dance under pulsing neon lights, laughing about exams and relationship drama as if those things were the end of the world.
Leo would be a star on the football team—loud, loved, the center of it all. I’d be halfway through a psychology degree, probably over-caffeinated and perpetually burned out, but happy.
One could dream.
That doesn’t mean I can’t make today feel special. I sneak into the kitchen and spot Carter at the wooden table, staring into his coffee mug. He looks as tired as I feel.
I made sure to wake up before Leo.
“Mind if I sit?”
“Go right ahead,” Carter says, gesturing toward the empty chair with an easy smile. His hazel eyes are open and inviting, free of the judgment I half-expected after yesterday.
“I have a favor to ask.” My fingers drum an antsy rhythm against the tabletop. “It’s Leo’s birthday, and I want to get him a cake. Do you think someone could pick one up while they’re out?”
It’s a heavy ask, especially right now, but I just want one small surprise for Leo.
One tiny slice of normal.
“It’s your birthday too, Lia.”
I shrug, smiling. “Twin perks. Leo deserves this. He deserves to feel normal, even if it’s only for five minutes.”
“It’s no problem. I’ll have Zayne stop by the store. We’re running low on supplies anyway.”
“Thank you, Carter. I appreciate it.”
“Happy birthday, Lia.”
“Thank you.” My fingers thread through my hair. “How’s training with Leo going?”
I skipped dinner last night, too embarrassed to face Kylo or Carter. Once the dining hall cleared out, I crept downstairs like a scavenger, picking through leftovers in the dark. I ate with my shoulders hunched, as if the walls themselves were watching me.
Just thinking about it now makes my cheeks burn.
Carter takes a slow sip of his coffee. “Leo doesn’t need much more training. At this point, we’re enhancing his meditation skills and fine-tuning his focus.”
Not surprising. Leo was mostly self-taught.
“Who trained you and Kylo?”
A shadow crosses Carter’s face before his features settle into a rigid, controlled mask.
“Our mother was a telepath, and our father was a vision seeker. They started training us as soon as we could walk. They knew the Aether Hunters were performing house raids, and they wanted us ready if the worst ever came to pass.”
He speaks in the past tense.
“What happened to them?” I ask, almost afraid of the answer.
“The Aether Hunters’ leader—Joaquin Lockhart—raided our home and killed them six years ago.” Carter’s knuckles turn white as his hands tighten into fists. “Kylo, Blair, and I were there. We barely made it out alive. After that, Uncle Piero took us in.”
Joaquin.
The name is a serrated blade, cutting through the morning calm.
Carter’s mouth continues to move, but the sound of his voice is replaced by a high-pitched ringing. Concern etches across his face, his lips moving as he leans forward.
“Are you alright?” His words sound distant, like they’re coming through a wall.
“Where’s Piero now?”
“Shortly before Blair was taken, we were on a mission tracking Aether Hunters. They were raiding an innocent family’s home. The family made it out alive. Piero didn’t.”
The realization hits me like a physical blow to the solar plexus. A sour heat rises in my throat, and my hands tremble so violently I have to hide them beneath the table.
I need air.
I shove my chair back, the legs screeching against the floor, and stumble toward the door. It slams behind me as I sprint down the path toward the beach. I don’t stop until the wooden walkway gives way to dunes and salty air.
I collapse, hands digging into the warm sand as if it might hold me together. I focus on the rhythm of the tide, the hiss of waves meeting the shore.
Nothing quiets the demons.
They’ve made a home inside me, in the parts I can’t fix.
The guilt. The horror. The sickening knowledge that Joaquin is tied to me by blood.
My body shakes as my thoughts spiral out of control. Kylo and Carter have no idea that the man who murdered their parents is my biological father. If they ever find out, the betrayal will break the trust we’ve built.
Grief erupts in my chest, sudden and consuming. Hot tears streak down my cheeks—tears for my mother, for theirs, and for every soul Joaquin has stolen.
He’s left a trail of broken families in his wake.
“Lia?”
Speak of the man who has a hold on me that I can’t break. He’s the last person who should be here right now. I can’t let him hear my thoughts.
Focus. Focus. Shut him out.
“Why are you crying?”
The unexpected softness in his tone nearly has my secrets tumbling out.
“I’m not.” I scramble to my feet, brushing the sand from my knees.
I feel like a child caught in a lie, awaiting a reprimand I know I deserve.
He pulls me against his chest. My body betrays me, giving in before my mind can protest. I melt into the warmth I didn’t know I was starving for.
“I can’t hear you,” he says into my hair, sounding both impressed and suspicious. “You figured out how to block me?”
I stay silent, my cheek pressed against the soft fabric of his shirt, listening to the thrum of his heart.
“Lia.” His hands slide down to my waist. “What are you hiding?”
I shut every door to my thoughts and bolt every window. I visualize the iron locks clicking into place, forming a fortress he can’t breach.
He pulls back, creating a distance that leaves me exposed. “And here I thought we were starting to trust each other.”
“This isn’t about trust.”
Leo and I need time to strategize before we drop a bomb that could incinerate this entire compound.
“You’re hiding something. Don’t insult me by pretending you’re not. I’ll figure it out—one way or another. You can lie with your mouth all you want, but your mind won’t be as careful. You’re not strong enough.”
The words sting.
Is that all I am to him? Someone beneath him? A student who will always be one step behind, too weak to hold her own?
He drags a hand through his hair. “I’m just trying to understand you.”
“Understand me? I’m trying to make sense of you. You kissed me yesterday and then acted like I didn’t exist.”
He exhales slowly, his gaze drifting toward the horizon where the gray sky meets the sea. The silence that follows reestablishes his cold walls.
“We can’t go there.”
“Why not?”
His calloused hand cups my cheek, and his thumb grazes my jawline with a tenderness that contradicts his words. “I’m not what you deserve.”
If only he knew.
“Knew what?” he asks, catching my fleeting thoughts.
“Nothing.”
He drops his hand as if the contact burned him. “This won’t work. There’s no trust.”
“If you didn’t have telepathy, you wouldn’t know what’s going on in here.” I tap my forehead. “Thoughts are meant to be private, Kylo. They’re mine, not yours. It’s not fair to base trust on something you were never meant to hear.”
“Your thoughts are always there—louder than anything else. That’s not something I can ignore. Not when I know you’re hiding something.”
I don’t blame him, but I can’t bend on this.
I’ll tell him when the time is right—if we survive this war long enough to have that conversation.
I circle back to his confession, to his belief that I deserve better.
“Why do you believe I deserve better?”
It’s a bitter irony. He hears everything in my head, yet I’ll never hear a single thought from him.
His guarded exterior locks firmly into place. “I kill people.”
The admission should place a wall between us. I search for the killer in the man who tucked my hair behind my ear, in how he tempers his strength around me, but I see someone else.
“That doesn’t change the way I feel about you.”
His stare fixes on mine, intense with an unreadable heat. “It should.”
“Why are you pushing me away?”
“We aren’t good for each other. This is a disaster waiting to happen. I won’t be your ruin.”
He talks like there’s something left to destroy.
“You get under my skin,” he murmurs. “No matter how far I try to distance myself from you, you’re still right there.”
His gaze drops to my mouth, and I bite my lower lip.
“Keep doing that, and I’ll forget every single reason why we shouldn’t do this.”
I don’t want him to pull away. I don’t want his restraint. I sense his energy between us, raw and electric, mirroring my own.
He traces the pad of his thumb along the curve of my lip. “You feel that, don’t you?”
I nod, my lungs tight, barely able to draw air.
“Then you know how badly I want you, even though we both know it’s wrong.”
He dips his head and brushes his lips over mine, agonizingly slow at first. I wrap my arms around his neck, anchoring myself as I press into him. A spark ignites deep in my core, sending a molten rush through my veins.
He groans into the kiss, his body hardening against mine. I shift, my thighs pressing together as the need becomes impossible to ignore.
He pulls back just enough to graze his lips against the sensitive shell of my ear. “I want to throw you on my bed and taste every inch of your body, but now isn’t the time.”
Reality crashes down like a bucket of ice water. I pull back, my eyes scanning our surroundings.
The beach. Out in the open.
He’s right. There’s too much at stake with an Aether Hunter on our trail and a move to Canada looming.
It doesn’t stop the disappointment from sinking in.
“Lia,” he warns, his eyes dark with a hunger that almost looks like pain. The vein in his neck pulsates. “Not here. Not now. But soon. I’ll fuck you until the only thing you feel is me.”
He steps away abruptly. “I’ll see you in an hour for training.”
I’m left standing there alone, breathless and buzzing.
I want Kylo to keep his promise.
“Cake’s ready and in the fridge,” Carter says as I step inside.
“Thank you,” I tell him, offering a grateful smile.
Leo walks into the kitchen, pausing when he sees us. “You needed something?” he asks Carter.
I wrap my arms around him. “Happy birthday!”
He hugs me back, squeezing. “Happy birthday to you too.”