Chapter Twenty #2
“Then it’s no different from a bikini. Get in.”
Screw it.
I turn my back to him, the cool air of the pool room raising goosebumps on my skin.
I tug my top over my head and let it flutter to the concrete behind me, then quickly slide out of my bottoms. I’m grateful I’m wearing my plain black lace set.
When I went shopping with Leo, I insisted on a few pieces that weren’t just functional sports bras.
Totally worth it.
I slip into the water, submerging just enough to hide. My skin tingles from the cool temperature, and maybe from his eyes.
“Told you it wasn’t bad,” he says with a grin that’s far too satisfied.
I roll my eyes and push off the wall, gliding through the water. The magenta lights ripple beneath the surface, casting soft shadows across the tile. Aside from the glow, the room is wrapped in a dreamy darkness.
He swims over, backs me against the pool wall, and plants his arms beside my head. “Keep looking at me like that and I’ll lose every bit of control I have left.”
“What if I want you to lose control?”
One of his hands finds the nape of my neck. He kisses my cheek, light and deliberate, then drifts closer, lips brushing mine. I gasp, a quiet sound consumed by him.
Every nerve fires beneath my skin.
I haven’t let anyone touch me in years. I didn’t think I could.
But Kylo feels different. Safe.
I don’t want his restraint. I want him.
I close the space between us and crush my lips to his.
The kiss is hungry, my tongue tangling with his as I drink him in. His fingers cradle my cheeks, his thumbs tracing the curve of my mouth.
He slows the kiss and pulls back. “Lia.” His lips skim mine again. “Slow down.”
“Why?” I breathe, my mind scrambling to catch up.
His forehead rests against mine, our breaths mingling. “I’m not taking you for the first time in our training pool.”
Needing a moment of reprieve, I inhale, hold, and dunk myself beneath the surface. The water is so clear, the opposite side shimmers into view. Tiny sea turtles are painted along the pool walls, their shells blurring with every ripple.
Kylo submerges and swims toward me, bubbles trailing behind him. He laces our fingers together before our mouths meet. “You’re beautiful.”
A rush of warmth spreads through me. I press my palm to his chest, hoping he can sense what he’s doing to me. Maybe he already knows. I let my emotions pour into him, every glimmer of longing, every hint of tenderness, all of it.
I resurface and drift toward the pool wall. Kylo follows, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close until my back melts against the firmness of his chest.
I rest there, tucked against him, listening to the peaceful rhythm of his heart beneath damp skin. His fingers trail through my soaked, tangled hair. He’s gentle, methodical, and my body relaxes immediately.
Even in the water, he smells good. His arms hold me steady as we float, anchoring me in place. My chest feels light, the tension finally unspooling.
I don’t know when it started. Somewhere between the training and the moments he stepped in without being asked.
“I feel you.” His fingers trace my collarbone. “You’re all I fucking think about, especially when we’re together.”
Reality hits me with sudden doubt.
What if it isn’t real?
What if I’m the reason he feels this way? What if my power is distorting the truth by unconsciously forcing him to feel what I’m feeling?
“You’re wrong,” he says, again in sync with my thoughts.
“How do you know?”
“This is real.”
“Only when we’re in proximity.”
“You can influence emotions. But you didn’t create this.”
I want to believe him, but how can he be certain?
“I wish I could read your mind.”
It isn’t fair that he can break into mine so easily while his stays sealed like a vault.
“You could block me if you wanted to.”
“If I block your thoughts, I lose control of my emotions,” I remind him.
“We’ll keep working on that.”
“I wish we could stay in here forever. It’s peaceful.”
“Me too. But we’ve got training tomorrow.”
Disappointment sinks in as Kylo climbs out of the pool and offers me his hand. I take it, letting him pull me to my feet. He grabs a towel from the nearest closet and tosses it to me. I dry off, tug my clothes on, and grimace at the feeling of wet hair soaking my back.
This is going to suck.
I’d trade this iciness for sun-drenched skies and warm sand between my toes any day.
“It’s only a two-minute walk. If we run, we’ll get there sooner.”
“That doesn’t make it any less bearable.”
“My room’s closer. We’ll stop there first.” He links our fingers and ushers me outside.
The blistering air instantly numbs my skin.
“I’m going to run,” his voice fills my thoughts.
We take off, sprinting through the chilled night. It’s so bitter it stings, but I can’t stop laughing. By the time we reach the building, we’re both breathless, rushing down the hall toward his room.
A burst of laughter escapes me, uncontrollable.
Kylo glances over, brow raised like I’ve lost it. “What’s so funny?”
“I just went swimming—with you, of all people—and now I’m in your room,” I say through a fit of shivers. “I think the cold’s made me delirious.”
“We were holding hands. Maybe our connection flooded you with adrenaline.”
“My emotions are always doing that. It’s like I’m trapped on a rollercoaster that never stops.”
He watches me closely with that quiet intensity in his eyes. “Do you dislike being an empath?”
The question lingers.
Do I?
I’d rather switch it off at will instead of enduring this constant emotional onslaught. I wouldn’t mind reading thoughts on command.
“I heard that.”
“You don’t understand how hard it is.”
“It took me years to master my abilities. You just started, and you’re already doing better than you think. Your empathy makes you one of the strongest people I know.”
Everyone keeps saying that, like being an empath is some rare gift. But they don’t have to live with the relentless emotional flood. I haven’t even begun to understand my siphoning abilities—I’m too busy trying, and failing, to manage it all.
I’m drowning. I need an off switch.
His gaze darkens, hungry. Like he’s on the verge of crossing a line we can’t come back from.
“What are you thinking?”
“I can help you turn it off,” he says slowly. “If that’s what you want.”
He’s offering me an escape.
My bravado from the pool vanishes. Being alone in a room with a bed changes everything. I crave him—more than I’d ever admit aloud. But beneath that desire lies something darker, something that paralyzes me.
I want to know what it feels like to be wanted without pain.
I trust Kylo, but the hushed shame I’ve carried still remains.
His fingers trail lightly across my collarbone, his mouth grazing the side of my neck. “You’re quiet,” he murmurs. “I can’t hear your thoughts. What’s going on?”
He needs to know before we take this further.
“I—You’re…”
He brushes a loose strand of hair from my face, gentle enough to disarm me. “What is it?”
“I haven’t been with anyone in two years.” I pause, gathering the courage to continue. “You’re the first person who’s touched me in a way I wanted.”