Chapter Twenty-Two
Lia
“If you tell me to stop, I will. You have all the control.”
“Okay,” I breathe, the tight band around my chest easing just enough to let a full breath in.
He braces himself on his arms, caging me in. “Before we go any further, I need to know if there’s anything specific that could trigger you. Anything I should avoid.”
“Violence,” I admit. “Just… don’t—”
His jaw locks, a muscle ticking in his cheek. He dips his head until his mouth hovers above mine, his breath warm against my lips. “Any man who raises a hand to hurt you isn’t a man.”
I wrap my legs around his waist, drawing him in until there’s no air left between us. “Don’t treat me any differently than you’d treat someone else.”
He doesn’t rush. His hands glide up my arms with a heavy, deliberate heat, offering a dozen silent chances to pull away. He grabs my wrists and pauses, his thumbs tracing the pulse there. “Is this okay?”
“Yes.”
He pins my hands above my head. The mattress dips under his weight as he locks them there, his other hand finding the hem of my shirt. The fabric grazes my skin for only a second before he drags it over my head.
His gaze drops, lingering with an intensity that makes my skin prickle. “You’re fucking perfect.”
His mouth finds me, and I arch into his touch. I lose my grip on the sheets, my fingers digging into his pillow as a deep ache coils in my belly.
“So responsive,” he murmurs.
He traces a path of slow, focused kisses down the center of my stomach. As he moves lower, the pressure of his hands no longer feels like his—it feels like Julian’s.
My breath hitches, freezing in my lungs.
“Eyes on me, Lia. You’re not there. You’re here. I’m the one touching you. I’m the one who’s about to taste you until you forget everything else.”
He hooks his fingers into my waistband and eases them down my legs. I kick them aside, a sharp inhale catching as his thumb slips beneath the lace of my panties. He circles a single, sensitive spot with a pressure so intentional he elicits a soft moan from me.
His mouth replaces his fingers with a startling heat, a sensation that has me squirming.
“Good girl,” he rasps.
My fingers curl into the bedding. He finds that one specific point of friction, and my body quakes, a gasp breaking free.
He grips my hips and drags me to the edge of the mattress. His fingers trail up my thighs, tracing soft, torturous spirals that keep the fire burning low in my belly.
“Stop teasing me,” I whisper.
“You have no idea how badly I’ve wanted this.” His eyes are dark, focused entirely on me. “Wanted you.”
He parts my legs, peeling the last of my clothes away. A wicked, knowing smirk flashes across his face before he rips his shirt over his head and tosses it.
My fingers find the waistband of his jeans. I want to see all of him.
His lips meet mine, and I sink, my body unspooling against his. He moves with a fluid, practiced ease, the snap of a wrapper punctuating the silence.
He doesn’t break the kiss.
Even now, he’s annoyingly good at multitasking.
A low moan escapes me as he slides a finger inside me. He finds a steady, relentless rhythm, each motion sending a jolt through my core. When a second finger follows, then a third, the pressure shifts from a sting to a breathless stretch.
He pauses, his weight over me. “Say the word, Lia. If it’s yes, I continue. If it’s no, I stop.”
“Yes.” The word feels foreign, a confession of a hunger I didn’t know I was allowed to have. I tangle my fingers in his hair. “I’m choosing this. I’m choosing you.”
A slow, sinful grin tugs at his mouth—a look that should be a warning, but only makes my pulse gallop.
He withdraws his fingers, and for a heartbeat, cold air rushes in before he replaces it with the thick heat of him. I wince as he slides in, a momentary sting as my body adjusts to his size.
“Breathe,” he commands.
I take a ragged inhale, the internal tightness giving way, melting until the ache morphs into something light and golden. He sinks deeper, filling me completely.
“Better?” he rasps.
“Yes… don’t stop.”
“You feel incredible,” he groans, his breath a scorching brand against my neck.
As he begins to move, every slow, deliberate thrust uncurls something inside me—knots of tension I’ve carried for years finally coming undone. The sensation is so deep, it’s overwhelming.
He quickens the pace, the friction sending my head back against the pillow. It’s a sensory overload—too much to process, yet I find myself chasing the next thrust before the last one has faded.
His mouth finds the curve of my neck, his teeth grazing my skin in a way that feels like a claim. I cling to his shoulders, my nails digging in, anchored to the present by the solid strength of his frame.
The room disappears.
No memories.
No fear.
Just him.
The tension in my belly tightens. My mind reaches for the brakes, bracing for an impact that isn’t coming.
“Let go, Lia. You’re allowed to feel this.”
The permission shatters the last of my defenses. My grip on the sheets loosens. Every muscle in my body uncurls, answering him with desperate, total surrender.
He takes his time, each consuming thrust filling the void until there’s no room left for anything but the way he makes me feel.
Our eyes stay locked as he leans down, capturing my mouth in a kiss that steals the air from my lungs. It’s a claim that feels like he’s imprinting his name into the heat of my skin.
Stars scatter behind my eyelids as the tension surges back, faster and more unrelenting than before. My body tightens around him, an involuntary pull. He drives deeper, chasing the peak with a focused intensity.
A broken cry leaves me as my muscles pulse in rhythmic waves that crash through my core. Kylo follows with a groan. The sound is raw, so primal it sends one final shiver down my spine.
He eases out of me, the sudden absence leaving me breathless in a different way. I watch him in the dim light as he moves to discard the condom, and then he’s back, the mattress dipping as he pulls me back into his space.
We lie there, our chests heaving in the same tempo. His eyes are dark and spellbinding, holding me in place.
His thumb traces my lower lip. “Are you okay?”
I bite my lip and nod.
There’s a strange lightness in my limbs. My body feels unwound in the best way, like it remembers how to rest. I look at him, searching for a sign that he felt even a fraction of what I did. I open my mouth to ask, but he pulls me against him.
“You were perfect,” he murmurs into my hair.
I lean up and kiss him—a slow, lingering press of lips that carries all the gratitude I can’t find the breath to speak.
He smiles and guides me to my side, tucking my back flush against his chest. I know I should probably get up, that I should return to the sanctuary of my own room, but my limbs are heavy, draped in a comfortable, bone-deep exhaustion.
He presses a kiss to the crown of my head. “Goodnight, Lia.”
I let my eyes fall shut without bracing—without counting breaths, without waiting for the other shoe to drop—and drift to sleep in his arms.
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
I jolt awake at the sound of Kylo’s obnoxious alarm. My eyes snap to the clock.
Nine a.m.
Shit.
I launch out of the tangled sheets, the cold morning air hitting my bare skin like a splash of ice water. I scramble across the floor, searching for articles of clothing scattered in every direction.
My top goes on quickly, the seams rubbing awkwardly against my skin. I glance down.
It’s inside out.
I hop on one foot, trying to untangle my underwear as my eyes sweep the room in a desperate search. One shoe is peeking out from under the bed. The other has apparently vanished into another dimension.
“What are you doing?” Kylo’s sleep-roughened voice vibrates through me.
He’s propped up on one elbow, his hair a chaotic mess. I have to physically shake my head to break the trance.
“We slept in,” I whisper-shriek.
I’m hunting for my shoes like they’re the final prize in a high-stakes scavenger hunt. “If Leo checks on me and I’m not there, he’s going to know something is up.”
The air beside me shifts. Kylo is there, a towering wall of warm skin and muscle.
He looks like a god. An unfair, jaw-dropping nuisance of a man.
He flashes a knowing grin, his eyes sparking with the kind of mischief that tells me he knows exactly what he’s doing to my heart rate.
I groan, dragging a hand over my face to hide the heat crawling up my neck. “Why can’t I keep my thoughts to myself?”
“You do.” He brushes his thumb over the frantic lines of my forehead, smoothing them away. “But I hear them anyway.”
“Whatever. Are you done?” I huff, though my face is still hot. “I need to shower and get ready for our session.”
“Let’s go.” He threads his fingers through mine, guiding me out of the room and into the hallway. I hesitate for a heartbeat, my gaze dropping to our joined hands.
We haven’t talked about what this is, or where the lines are drawn.
We turn the corner. I stop short.
Leo is leaning against my door. His arms are locked across his chest, jaw set so tight the muscle in his cheek ticks.
Kylo’s grip tightens around mine, a silent anchor, as Leo pushes off the wall. The anger radiating off him hits me in physical waves.
Kylo braces behind me. I step forward, planting myself between them like a human blockade.
My hand flies up, catching his chest. “Leo, don’t.”
“I trusted you to train her, not fuck her!” Leo snaps, his eyes darting to our joined hands.
“Leo, please. Just listen—”
“You think you’ve got time to screw around? You don’t have that luxury. Every second you waste in his bed is time you should have spent preparing for what’s coming.”
Kylo steps in, circling around me. “Lia’s been preparing.”
Leo’s fists curl. I move between them again, wrapping my hands around his. “Don’t. Please don’t do this.”
“You should be using your time diligently. You have no idea how important that is.”
“I know. Everyone keeps saying that. But no one will tell me why. I saw your vision, Leo. It was awful. What are you hiding from me?”
“I’m not hiding anything,” he snaps.
“If something is coming, I deserve to know.”
With my hands pressed to his, the barrier between us thins.
The fury and fear he’s kept locked inside press against each other, tearing him apart. I draw in a breath, sending him the calm I’m desperate to feel myself.
“What are you doing?” he asks, his jaw grinding as he tries to fight the shift.
“I’m trying to help you. Why won’t you let me?”
He rips his hands from mine. “You know I can’t talk about my visions, Lia. You know the rules.”
“Give him some time.” Kylo’s words hum through my mind.
He storms off, disappearing down the hall.
Leo and I don’t fight. Not like this. I swallow past the sudden burn in my throat, blinking back the moisture in my eyes.
I won’t fall apart in front of Kylo again.
I open my door. “I’m going to get ready. I’ll see you in a bit.”
Kylo’s boot slides into the doorframe.
I sigh. “What are you doing?”
He pulls me closer. “Don’t shut me out. I get that you’re worried about him, but he’ll be fine.”
“How do you know?” I ask, my voice muffled against his shirt.
“He needs a minute to cool off. He just found out his twin sister slept with the man he trusted to train her.”
“Ugh.” I hide my face in my hands, the heat of embarrassment blooming in my cheeks. “This is a disaster.”
Kylo laughs. He catches my wrists and peels my hands away. “He’ll come around. Get ready before I come up with other plans that don’t involve training.”
He crashes his mouth to mine—a fierce, breath-stealing second that feels less like a goodbye and more like a brand. He walks away with a casual stride as if he hadn’t just upended my morning.
I head for the bathroom, stripping off my clothes and stepping into the shower. Steam swirls around me in clouds, but it does little to soothe the cold disquiet settled in my gut.
Not long ago, the mere mention of Kylo’s name made my teeth ache with irritation. Now we’re trading kisses so possessive they feel like a lifeline.
Last night, he didn’t just touch me.
He treated me like I mattered. He didn’t flinch when I bared the ugly truths I’d sworn to secrecy.
He saw my demons and didn’t turn away. Instead, he kissed them into submission until the shame dissolved into the mattress.
I lean my forehead against the cool tile, the water sluicing over my hair. It’s more than the way my body short-circuits when he’s near. It’s the way he sees the pieces of me I’ve hidden from everyone, even from myself.
I should keep my distance. I know the math.
He’s dangerous in ways that have nothing to do with a blade, and I’m not sure I have enough armor left to protect my heart from him.
Is it reckless to want him now? To care about a man and still fight like a soldier?
And then there’s Leo.
His face said everything he didn’t.
I’ll never live down the mortifying words he threw at us about Kylo fucking me instead of training me.
After I rinse off the last bit of soap, I lean against the tile, not ready to face what’s waiting out there.