Chapter 26
Serenity
With the growing danger and finding out a gang is connected to the break-in, I can’t settle.
My mind always races to the worst-case scenario.
What if they find where we are now and hurt Summer?
On top of everything, Victor has become a rock for me.
I seek him out without realizing it. When I catch myself doing it, I slap myself internally.
We haven’t talked about the night at the hotel, and I’m not sure if that makes it better or worse. I feel like we’re a bomb about to explode if we don’t confront it.
I need to woman up and tell him it was only physical. I can’t handle emotions right now. Maybe not ever. But I can possibly have a sex-only relationship with Victor—if he agrees. People do “friends with benefits” every day, so I should be able to handle it, too. I’m a grown-ass woman.
But there’s not just me and my feelings to consider.
I sigh. As I suspected would happen from the beginning, Summer always looks at Victor with hearts in her eyes. If she was never threatened, I wouldn’t have accepted his offer. Now, she’ll be the most heartbroken out of all of us.
“Earth to Serenity,” Harmony says, pulling me from my thoughts. “You’ve been staring at the clothes in your closet for five minutes without moving.”
I flinch. “Sorry. I was lost in thought.”
“I saw Victor with Sully downstairs. And your man”—she wiggles her eyebrows when I glare over at her—“just told me that the clinic called to schedule you for your first volunteer shift on Monday.” She steps up beside me and pulls me in for a hug.
Her arms wrap around mine so I can’t embrace her back.
“I’m so happy you can still follow your calling in taking care of people. ”
Victor’s big mouth is going to make it so I can’t tell anyone my good news.
“I literally just hung up with them thirty minutes ago. I can’t believe he already told you.”
She releases me, and her face turns serious. “You should’ve seen how proud he was when he spoke of you. I think he’s falling in love.”
“No,” I say harsher than intended. “Absolutely not.”
“Then maybe you need to tell—”
I shoot her a glare, and her words fall off. “I need to finish getting ready. Can I have some privacy?”
A soft knock sounds. Harmony’s hesitant eyes meet mine. “I bet that’s him now.”
Ignoring her look, I go to the door. My breath hitches as I take him in. He’s wearing khakis and a button-up shirt. No tie. His shirt isn’t tucked in. And he has on these brown boots that somehow make me press my thighs together. This is the most “normal” I’ve ever seen him.
Victor’s lips hitch up in a tentative smile when I meet his gaze. “Do you like what you see?”
Harmony slips past us, but neither of us looks at her. “I’ll go hang out with Summer so you two can talk.”
Talk? That’s absolutely the last thing I want to do right now.
Victor shifts, and his shirt tightens around his lean muscles, like it’s another layer of his skin. Even though I know I shouldn’t, I’m not a strong enough woman to resist checking him out.
Giving in to the physical urges was a mistake. Now, I can picture pulling him inside my room and stripping off his clothes. I bite my lip. I shouldn’t be thinking about this. If we continue down a physical path, it will lead to carnage.
He glances side to side, probably checking to make sure we have privacy. “If you don’t stop looking at me like that, I’m coming inside your room and locking this door.”
“Only if you agree anything we do is just sex,” I say breathlessly, finally voicing what I haven’t been able to until now. “It’s all I can handle.” My voice comes out softer than intended, and I want to kick myself for sounding so pathetic.
I know I shouldn’t agree to anything physical again, yet I can’t resist. I also know proposing such a thing to a man like Victor—who deserves everything—is an asshole move.
His gaze softens, and something I can’t quite pinpoint crosses his face. Maybe longing? “I’ll worship your body whenever you allow me to.”
I nod, fire already igniting to life within my veins. On these rare occasions, it can be just us. No outside pressure. No strings attached. Only two people making each other feel good.
I drop my gaze and look down at my clasped fingers. I can still back out. I should. I need to. But none of those words come out. Instead, I ask, “Can I take care of you today?”
He takes two steps forward and closes the door behind him before locking it, like he promised, and I shiver.
I’ve ached for his hands on me again no matter how much I’ll deny it. “Have you thought about me since the hotel?”
He nods and steps in closer. “Have you gotten off since I made you come?” Victor’s voice deepens. “Or have you been a good girl?”
I look up at him from under my eyelashes. “I’ve been good.”
He closes the space between us, and I hold my ground even though I have the urge to back up. “I love when you’re a good girl.”
“It’s a rarity for me, I know.”
Victor’s lips quirk up. “Your defiance and fire have always been what attracted me to you.”
I wrap my arms around his waist and pull him to me so our bodies are flush. And every nerve lights up like live wire.
He grips my hips and doesn’t move for a moment. “Are you sure?”
I nod.
“I want to hear you say the words.”
I don’t hesitate this time. “I’m sure.”
Victor groans as he rubs his thumb across my bottom lip. So gentle. “I might’ve thought about you in bed when I couldn’t sleep last night and possibly in the shower this morning.”
My stomach somersaults. “You thought about me?”
He nods once. “You’ve plagued me ever since you glared up at me with fire in your eyes the very first time, but I didn’t conjure up your beautiful lips wrapped around my cock until after I touched you. I can only imagine how that will feel.”
Now butterflies erupt in my stomach. They flutter up to my chest, and my heart pounds against my ribcage. Everything about touching him … Being touched by him … It all feels like I’m being consumed by an inferno. If I’m not careful, I’ll get burned.
Victor lowers his head, and my breath catches.
My palms turn sweaty, and my belly is a bundle of nerves.
It has been years since I’ve touched a man, pleased a man.
The moment his firm lips press against mine, all my fears evaporate, and my mind empties.
His hard cock pushes against my stomach as our mouths battle for dominance.
His hand finds my core through my jeans, and I instantly come apart. I moan, and he uses the opportunity to clash his tongue with mine. Just like normal, we both make our stand against each other, but his is more playful, and mine is to seize control before I lose myself completely.
I move his hand away. “Don’t forget I’m making you feel good tonight.”
His eyes flash with an intense heat. “I’ll agree only because we don’t have long. But later, you’re all mine.”
Before I can think about his words and their implication, my hands are on his pants buckle.
He slides them down his waist, and they pool on the floor.
His cock strains against his boxers, begging to be released, to be touched.
As I pull down his underwear, releasing him, liquid heat pools in my stomach.
“Don’t forget we have to be quiet,” Victor whispers into the shell of my ear before trailing kisses down my neck.
His words and lips send a chill down my spine. Somehow the thought of being caught like we’re teenagers again makes this even hotter.
“Make sure you’re quiet.”
A chuckle vibrates out of his chest, but the sound cuts off as I wrap my fingers around his girth. He groans. The noise sends a roll of power through me. I tighten my grip and move my hand faster.
A guttural groan fills the room.
“If you don’t slow down, I’m going to come already.”
I comply. This time.
I’m not ready to give up this moment. After this, we might not see each other intimately again, so I have to savor it all.
Rubbing my thumb over the tip of his cock, I swipe the precum, and when I look up at him, he meets my eyes.
I hold his gaze and bring my fingers to my mouth, sucking off all of his come, and his eyes dilate even more.
“You are such a fucking good girl.” His voice comes out barely louder than a whisper, and my core clenches.
I’d probably do anything to hear him say that again. Who knew I had a praise kink?
He hisses as I bring my hand back to his cock, and I stroke all the way down to the hilt. His hips buck forward as I start to pump faster again.
“You’re destroying me, Serenity.”
His words make me drop to my knees, and I lick up the length of his cock.
A moan escapes his mouth as he plunges his fingers into my hair, wrapping the strands around his fist with a tight grip.
I cover my lips around his cock and slowly take the rest of him into my mouth.
My eyes sting with tears as he reaches the back of my throat, but I don’t care.
I use both of my hands to pump the base of his cock as I continue to take him to my throat.
“Fuck. Serenity, I’m going to come.” His words come out harsher than I’ve ever heard but not in an angry way. “You’re my undoing.”
I don’t slow my movements this time. No, I need to remain in control. Instead, I move quicker, tears forming in my eyes. I look up at him, and our gazes clash. He pulls my hair, so I look all the way up at him.
“Are you going to swallow my come like a good girl?”
I nod before bringing him to my throat again. As I gag, I hold him there and pump him. His moan fills the room, and his hips jerk.
“I’m coming,” Victor grits out as he pulls out and slams into my face one last time. I swallow, and more and more come slides down my throat.
I look up at him, my eyeliner and mascara probably running down my face and adrenaline rushing through my veins.
Pushing to a standing position, I’m unsure what to do now.
This is a sex-only arrangement, so it’s not like I’m expecting a declaration of love or even cuddling.
But something has definitely shifted. And I don’t like it.
Victor straightens himself and pulls me to him. “Next time, I promise we’ll both come together.”
Next time. I don’t think I can handle a next time while holding my boundaries. He finds the smallest ways to throw me off balance like a simple embrace and a promise I know he intends to keep.
This has to be the last time before I lose myself.