Chapter 28 #2
"What's your romantic porn book saying now?” I mutter, kicking off my boots and tugging my shirt over my head.
She peeks over the edge of the book, smirking. “Don’t judge. This one has a knife-wielding assassin who falls for the girl he’s supposed to kill. He feeds her strawberries in a blood-stained bathtub.” She looks over my chest quickly, stopping at one of the scars.
I blink. “Right. That’s... romantic.”
“It is,” she argues, grinning now. “You just don’t get it.”
I drop beside her, my head resting against her thighs as she puts the book down and starts threading her fingers through my hair. The pressure of her touch is soft, grounding. Her nails trail against my scalp in slow, lazy circles.
“So, is it full of porn?”
She laughs, low and sweet. “It’s not porn. It’s literature... with spice.”
“That’s what people say when they don’t want to admit they’re turned on by blood and bondage.”
She flicks my forehead.
I close my eyes, letting her touch settle something raw inside me.
It’s quiet for a few minutes before she speaks again. “Can I ask you something?” I hum in response. “How come I never saw Cain back then? I mean, I basically lived in your house, and I never even heard his name.”
My eyes stay closed, but my chest tightens.
“That’s a long story,” I murmur. “And if I tell you, I’d have to tell you everything about the family too.”
She’s quiet, then leans down a little, her voice brushing my ear. “It’s a good job I love you... and your family.”
There’s something about the way she says it, like it’s the most obvious truth in the world. I don’t say anything, I can’t. So, I just keep my eyes closed and let her hands soothe the storm still lurking in the back of my skull.
But the words come anyway.
“I love you, Olivia.” She stills a little. Just for a second. “But the last time I said that to you,” I open my eyes and tilt my head to meet her, “I ended up in prison.”
She swallows, her smile fades, her body tenses beneath me.
“I get it now,” I continue. “I get why you did what you did. I’ve had time to let the truth settle, and I don’t hate you.
I want to, sometimes, because it would be easier...
but I can’t. But I’m scared. Scared that if something like that ever happens again, if your world falls apart...
you’ll shut me out. You’ll lie again. You’ll leave me in the dark. ”
She goes still, the hand moving through my hair stops, and I place my hand on top of hers, which is placed on my chest.
“All I want from you,” I say, “is a promise. A real one. That if anything bad happens, anything at all, you come to me. Not after, not when it’s too late, but the second it starts.”
She nods, eyes glassy, voice soft.
“I promise,” she whispers. “I swear to you... I will never hurt you again. I really am sorry Hayden. I would have done everything so different back then if I could.” Her voice cracks and she moves closer, both hands cradling mine.
“I promise I will never lie to you again. Not out of fear. Not to protect anyone. You’re my person, Hayden.
You always were. I lost you once because I thought I didn’t have a choice, and I’ll never make that mistake again.
” She presses her forehead to mine. “I vow, no matter what, no matter how dark it gets, you’ll be the first person I come to.
You’ll never be in the dark again. You deserve the truth, always. ”
I don’t say anything. But place my hand behind her neck to pull her closer to me as I kiss her, letting the vow sinks into me like a lifeline.
After a while, I pull back, resting back on her thigh, and her hand is moving through my hair again.
“You really want to know about Cain?”
She nods. “Yeah. I want to know everything.”
I’m not sure where to really start because it’s a long messed up story, but she’s part of us, so she needs to know.
I tell her everything from the start, she listens, eyes wide as I tell her what he went through, to his first love, to coming out and then training us to be the family we are now.
How granddad started the family clinic, then made it into what it is behind closed doors.
It’s a lot to take in, but it’s better to tell her all in one go.
“He doesn’t sleep much. Hates hospitals. Carries pain like it’s his armor. Cain made sure the Pit was his, and it is. He runs it now.”
She exhales slowly. “So, you... you’re in that now?”
“Yeah. I kill people who deserve it,” I say it flatly. No sugar-coating. “Rapists. Traffickers. Monsters. The file Cain gave me... all the targets. All of them were connected to what happened to me in prison. That’s why he kept me busy. Gave me a purpose.”
Her eyes soften. “But it still broke you.”
“No,” I say, brushing her cheek. “Losing you broke me. The rest just reminded me what kind of world we live in.” I hated what she did to me, and at the time I thought she did break me, but now I know it wasn’t her, but the system, and money.
She leans into my touch.
“And now?” she whispers.
“Now I want to protect what I still have.”
Silence wraps around us again. “I don’t deserve you,” she breathes.
I lean in and kiss her forehead. “Maybe not. But you’ve got me anyway.”
She brushes her lips against mine, and I have to pull away. “As much as I love your lips on mine, and other places, you’re making it very hard for me not to take this any further, and there is no way I’m doing it under this roof for the first time, with my parents down the corridor.”
She smiles, kisses me once more, then bites her bottom lip a little, then breaks eye contact with me and looks over at the door and I laugh.
“I promise you, you won’t be quiet.” She slaps my chest and shakes her head. “What?” There’s one thing about Olivia, she’s always so easy to read.
She starts tapping her fingers on my chest. “The thing is…rumors around college…you’ve been with…and—”
“First of all, I haven’t been with a lot of girls.” I lie, but this is a lie worth telling. “So, what else is on your mind?”
“I haven’t been with anyone,” she says quickly, then looks away again. I sit up, and face her, and snake her to look at me. “After what happened at prom, I’ve always been scared, and—” she takes a deep breath and exhales hard. “All I ever wanted was you, I always wanted it to be you.”
I lean in closer and kiss her, and she wraps her arms around my neck. “What would you do if this never worked out?”
Olivia lies back on the bed, and I lie on top of her, kissing the side of her neck.
“It was going to be one of two options.”
“And they were?” I kiss her jaw.
“Option one was to believe in true love, and that one day we would be together and until then I wait.” I hear a small moan escape her as I kiss down her neck.
“The second option?"
“I was going to become a nun and read my porn books.” I pull away from her laughing so hard I can’t stop. My hands placed on the pillow beside her shaking my head at her.
“You’d be one sexy as hell nun.” I lean back down to kiss her. “Tomorrow night we will go back to your room after we visit the hospital.” I could go home, but if this is her first time, I’m going to make sure she can’t even get out of bed for the whole day. And it won’t be just the once either.
I’m going to be making up for lost time, a lot of lost time with her.