Chapter Eighteen
I shouldn’t be here. Shouldn’t be watching this. But I can’t peel myeyes away. My little brother is eating out Vivienne. It’s obscene the way Kaz fucks her with his finger while sucking her clit. And yet, it’s the single hottest thing I’ve seen in my lifetime. Vivienne looks so beautiful. Her face upturned and relaxed. I can see the sheer ecstasy on her face. She pulls on my brother’s hair. I can tell she’s close.
My cock aches as I watch her come on Kaz’s tongue. An angry burn of jealousy and desire rolls through me like the slow crawl of lava. I rub my hand down the front of my jeans and turn away. I’m going to leave. I’ve seen enough.
But I don’t. Instead, I pull every pair of curtains shut. Just in case someone comes looking. Everyone knows a dark hallway means stay out. I can’t lie; it’s also to hide me from them. If Vivienne or Kaz catch me, who knows what will happen. Once the hallways are cloaked in shadows, I return to Vivienne”s bedroom doorway.
For the first time, I notice a third body in the room. A dead one. But it’s not stopping Kaz or Vivienne as he drops his pants. She really is our brand of crazy. A strangled groan pulls my attention back to the spectacle before me.
As Kaz takes his time sinking into her, I pull out my steel cock. I rub my fist over it, massaging the thick veins. I feel hypnotized as I watch him thrust into her. The sound of her moans is something of a masterpiece. I only wish it was my name, she was saying.
Vivienne’s striking blue eyes grab Kaz’. Time seems to stop. As if we’re all suspended in a sapphire-colored trance. The room pulses with the tension between them. I can feel the connection between them from here.
The moment is popped by Kaz. He hoists her up into his arms. Banding them around her waist to keep a grip on her. I watch his hips punch back and forth, my hand working to find the same exquisite rhythm. My body tingles. Aching with the need to get close to them. But I keep my feet rooted to the floor, not daring to move. Until I feel her eyes on me.
I look up, meeting Vivienne’s gaze. She’s peering at me like she can’t recognize me for a moment. Call me a bastard, but I can’t resist the urge to step forward, just a little more into the light. I want her to see what she’s doing to me. What they’re doing to me. The room fills with the sound of their lovemaking. It’s filthy. I’ve never been harder than I am at this moment. My breath stutters as I rush to keep up with Kaz’s pace. Pre-cum leaks from my tip. I coat my hand in it, imagining I’m fucking Vivienne’s tight little pussy instead.
My orgasm hits me like a freight train. It comes from nowhere and everywhere all at once. Kaz and Vivienne cry out with me. Splatters of my cum fall to the floor. My body trembles in the aftermath. The release drains me for a moment. My knees start to buckle. I grip the door frame to keep myself upright. The doorframe creaks slightly. Kaz’s head snaps up. His eyes zero in on me almost instantly. I can’t read the look on his face. To be honest, I’m not sure I want to. Is this something I’m really prepared to start? I don’t know.
Kaz and I stare at each other for a long moment, too frozen to move. He’s covering Vivienne’s exhausted body with his. Something I wish I could be doing. I ache to be in that bed with her—with them. But I never will be. My brother got to her first. She is his now.
With that thought, I drop Kaz’s gaze and slink back to the shadows. I can’t bring myself to feel shame for what I just did, but my chest is heavy with the wish that all of this could be different. That I could be in Kaz’s shoes. I take a deep breath, forcing myself to shut everything out. To be who I am. The stoic boss, not the man lusting after his baby brother’s girl. I manage to zip up my pants before I abandon the hallway altogether.
The house is quiet as I stalk through, hoping like hell I make it upstairs to my office without running into anyone else. But lady luck has never been fond of me.
“Mr. Volkov,” Lilianna’s voice comes from behind me.
I freeze, turning to look behind me. My daughter stands there, her long hair twisted in two braids, making her look younger than fifteen years.
“Have you seen Vivienne?” she continues when I do nothing but look at her like a dumbass.
I shake my head quickly. “No, I haven’t.”
The lie rolls off my tongue easily. Just as easy as a stone of guilt falls to my gut. Funny how lying never bothered me before. I guess it’s different when you’re lying to your child’s face.
Lilianna looks discouraged. “She was supposed to give me a self-defense lesson.”
“Self-defense? Why do you need that?”
“I don’t,” Lilianna argues. “I just wanted one to feel…”
She trails off, her voice small and timid.
“Tell me,” I reply. “What is it you want?”
“I want to feel strong.”
She looks down at the ground. The toe of her tennis shoe kicks at the floor.
“I can teach you.”
Lilianna looks up, her gray eyes guarded. “Self-defense?”
“I don’t know self-defense, but I know how to shoot a gun, and that’s just as good, don’t you think?” I can see the worry, the fear in her eyes. It guts me. “Lilianna, look, I know you don’t know me, but based on what your mother told you, I understand why you’re afraid of me. It’s okay if you’d rather not spend time with me.”
I fall silent, waiting for her answer. In the short time that Vivienne has been here, I’ve seen a change in Lilianna. She’s calmer. It also helps that she’s been so busy following Vivienne around that she hasn’t had time to see Arkadi.
“I think I will wait for Vivienne, but thank you.”
“Anytime,” I mutter. “Maybe check the kitchen for Vivienne. I heard there was an orange juice incident, and she missed out on breakfast.”
Because she was too busy getting railed by Kaz, but Lilianna doesn’t need to know that.
“Thanks.”
She turns to walk away. I know I told her that I understand, but it doesn’t make any of this any easier. It doesn’t stop me from wishing all this was different. If Katerina had told me about Lilianna, I would’ve been there. I might not have been happy at first. Katerina knew I didn’t want kids. She was supposed to have an IUD. But I guess nothing is 100 percent. Even so, I would’ve helped her raise my daughter. It’s too late now.
“One more thing,” Lilianna says. “It’s my birthday in a few days.”
“I know,” I croak. “Is there something special you want to do?”
“Could… could we have a party?”
“A party?”
Lilianna nods. “I’ve never had a birthday party.”
“Never? What did you and Katerina do for your birthdays?”
She shrugs. “Not much. Sometimes, she gave me a cupcake with a candle to blow out. Most of them, she was too busy working, and I spent them with my nanny.”
Shame hits me. If I had known about my daughter, I would have made every birthday her best.
“I’m sorry,” I reply. “That wasn’t fair to you. We can have a party.”
Lilianna’s eyes light up. She smiles so big and radiant. My chest warms just by looking at it.
“Thank you, Mr. Volkov, I mean, Mikhail. I promise it will be small and quiet.”
My heart stutters. She called me by my name. I know it’s just a small thing. A tiny one, really, but it means a lot. She’s warming up to me despite her mother’s lies.
“You’re turning sixteen,” I reply. “This party needs to be huge. You can do whatever you want.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Just get me a list. I’ll have Mama Volkov help me plan it.”
“Plan what?” Vivienne asks as she comes out of the hallway.
She looks perfect. No evidence of what just went on in her bedroom. She’s still wearing her pencil skirt but with a blue shirt covering her bra now. There’s no denying Vivienne is gorgeous, but I think I’d prefer it if she never wore clothes.
“Mikhail is letting me have a birthday party,” Lilianna gushes.
Her excitement about such a small gesture both hurts and heals. I’m glad she’s happy. I want my daughter to be happy all the time. But I’m angry that she’s damn near sixteen and has never enjoyed a birthday party. It shouldn’t be like that.
“Is it your birthday soon?”
Lilianna nods. “I’ll be sixteen.”
“A sweet sixteen,” Vivienne replies as she looks at me. “How sweet of your father to do that.”
“Sweet?” I chuckle. “I don’t think anyone has ever called me sweet.”
“First time for everything.”
There’s a haunted look in her eyes. Cobwebs of pain that I would give anything to understand. What is capable of putting that look there? Vivienne is strong, and she takes no shit. I can’t imagine that someone could ever do anything to put a chink in her armor.
“Lilianna was looking for you. Something about a self-defense lesson?” I say, changing the subject.
“Oh yeah,” Lilianna interrupts. “I want to learn that move.”
“I’ll teach you,” Vivienne agrees. “Let me eat something first, though. I’m starved.”
I can’t help but grin. I wonder what gave her such an appetite. She shoots me a scathing glare, just daring me to say something.
“There’s still some pancakes left in the kitchen,” Lilianna says, pulling Vivienne’s attention to her.
I hate to lose it, but I can’t say much. Lilianna looking up to Vivienne is a good thing. Their becoming close is a good thing. Vivienne is a better role model than Katerina could have ever dreamed of being. Lilianna needs a strong woman like her in her life. If Kaz has his way, Vivienne will be her aunt. Maybe I should be grateful for that, even if I want Vivienne to be much more than that.
They leave me at the bottom of the stairs and head towards the kitchen. My eyes stray down to Vivienne’s pert ass. It sways with each step. The rhythm of it is almost hypnotizing.
A throat clears next to me. My gaze flies to my little brother. His eyes are on Vivienne’s ass. He doesn’t look at me as he speaks.
“Why were you watching?”
I look away from him, catching Vivienne staring looking over her shoulder at us. Her big blue eyes sparkle as if she knows something we don’t. Or maybe it’s just me that doesn’t.
“You were quick,” I reply. “We don’t even know if she’s an enemy or not.”
“I told you I didn’t care. She’s mine. It’s even better if she is an enemy. The sex is hotter when there’s a little bad blood.”
“You’re psychotic.”
Kaz waits until Vivienne is out of sight before looking at me. “You want her.”
I don’t say a word. Like I would admit that to my brother. I may be the boss, but I’m not that much of an asshole.
“You not going to admit it?”
“There’s nothing to admit.”
“Don’t fucking lie to me, Mikhail. It’s so obvious after what just happened. Who do you think you’re fooling?”
“It doesn’t matter,” I reply. “You got to her first. Fair and square.”
He gives me a nervous yet determined look before knocking me off my axis with five little words.
“I know how to share. Do you?”