Chapter 20
Chapter Twenty
I’m lying in Lex’s bed, in his arms. I don’t want to move. I could stay here forever and not need another single thing in my life. Lex’s fingers aimlessly trail up and down my arm. It’s soothing.
I feel so damn relaxed right now. It’s refreshing. My mind is actually quiet.
“What do you want to do today?” he says.
“Mmm, I’m doing it,” I say, snuggling farther into his chest.
“You want to stay in bed all day? Get room service?”
“What did you have planned?” I ask, because he’s had something planned every day since we’ve been here.
“My cousin Lorenzo invited us over for lunch,” Lex tells me. “We don’t have to go.”
“We should go. He’s your family,” I say.
“He’s a grouchy asshole. I won’t lose sleep over not seeing him while we’re here.”
“You don’t like him?” I sit up so I can see his face. Lex says a lot of shit about his family, but I know deep down he loves them.
“I like you more.”
I smile. “Well, obviously, I’m the best.” I laugh. “But seriously, Lorenzo, do you like him or not?”
“I like him. He’s family.”
“Okay, then let’s go have lunch with him. Who else will be there?”
“Probably his wife, Kyla. She’s nice.”
“Wait… This is the billionaire cousin? Shit, what do I wear?”
“Whatever you want to wear, and his wife is a billionaire, not him.” Lex laughs.
“They’re married. It’s the same thing.” I shrug. “I should have packed some nicer clothes.”
“You want to go shopping?”
I shake my head. My brows furrow. “No, I can’t. As soon as we get back to New York, I’m going to get a job.”
“Why?”
“Because we’re not all trust-fund brats, Lex. Some of us need to work.” I chuckle, trying to make light of the very different financial situations we’re in. “I was planning on finding a job around college anyway.” I can tell he wants to say something but is biting his tongue. “Just say it.”
“I can’t. It’ll just piss you off.” He smirks.
“Lex, you’re going to piss me off if you don’t say it,” I warn him.
“You don’t need to work. We…” He points between us. “…have enough money, and as soon as we get back to New York, I’ll have a card with your name on it for you to use.”
He’s right. I am pissed. “We…” I repeat his motion of pointing between us. “…don’t have money. You have money,” I correct him.
“You just said that Lorenzo is a billionaire because his wife is.”
“Because they’re married.”
“Okay, fine. We’re getting married then.” Lex shrugs.
At this, I laugh. Which wasn’t the response he was looking for because now he looks pissed off.
“I’m so thrilled the idea of marrying me is hysterical to you, Addi.” He scowls.
I blink. Shit, I think I actually hurt his feelings. “I’m sorry. It’s not. It’s more the idea that you thought that was even close to a proposal. You can’t just decide we’re going to get married. And I am not marrying you for money.”
“No, you’re going to marry me because you love me.”
“I do love you, but we’re not getting married,” I tell him.
“Why not? You know I’m never going to be okay with you dating anyone else.”
“What? I do not want to date anyone else, Lex.” Is he insane?
“Then I don’t see any reason why we can’t or shouldn’t get married. You’re it for me, Addi. I love you like I’ve never loved anything, and now that I have you back, I don’t ever want to let you go.”
“That was better and definitely a step in the right direction for a proposal, Lex.” I smile.
I can’t imagine being without him again either, but that doesn’t mean we need to rush into marriage.
We only just had sex last night. I didn’t even know if I could enjoy it, but I did—oh, did I enjoy it.
I was relieved. I really thought I’d be too messed up to like sex again.
But when Lex is touching me, everything else fades away. It’s just him and me.
“Addison, will you please marry me?” Lex sits up, taking my hands in his.
“I will most certainly marry you, Lex.” I smile. “But I think we should wait until we’re older.”
“Why?”
“Because it seems like the thing we should do,” I say. I don’t really know why. It’s just… too fast?
“I’ll wait forever for you, Addi, but I don’t need to wait. I know you’re it for me. Time isn’t going to change that.”
“I’m afraid of getting to be too much for you, Lex. I like when we’re together. I like how free and safe I feel when you’re with me. I like how you have a way of quietening the noise. I’m scared I’m going to need you too much.”
“I want to be that for you, Addison. I don’t care if you want to glue yourself to me 24/7. In fact, I would prefer you did. Because as much as you need me, I need you too.”
“Okay. Yes.”
“Yes?”
“Let’s do it. Let’s get married,” I tell him.
Lex jumps at me, pushing me down until I’m on my back. His lips slam onto mine. “I fucking love you,” he says, breaking the kiss momentarily.
My arms wrap around his neck and I hold him tighter. “I love you.”
Something flickers across Lex’s face, and he sits up. “Shit, I shouldn’t have done that. Are you okay?” he asks, looking me up and down.
“I’m fine, and I don’t want you to walk on eggshells around me, Lex.”
“I don’t want to hurt you or scare you.”
“If I don’t like something, trust that I will tell you.”
He looks at me silently. “I don’t know if I can trust that, Addi. You didn’t tell me… The one time you needed me the most, you ran from me.”
“I was trying to protect you from doing anything that would get you into trouble, Lex. I didn’t want you to see me like that,” I say.
“I know you would have helped me. I never doubted that. I know you would have done anything for me, Lex. I also know you would have killed him and I didn’t want you to have to do that for me.
” Although he ended up killing the guy who hurt me anyway.
And somehow his father has kept him out of trouble.
“Promise me that you will tell me. No matter how you think I might react to something, you will tell me if you’re hurt or if I do something that scares you,” Lex says.
“I promise.”