Chapter 11 Liar #2
Learning to play Low Rider was so weird, as was the small yellow ukulele Pinkie had brought for me.
Minx was playing with the kitten, sprawled out on the jet’s luxurious carpet while Trixie fiddled with my wedding ring on a side desk.
Specifically, she was inserting a little dart into the bottom that I could pull out of the band when Nix’s defenses were down, so we could knock him out.
The process involved a small blowtorch with a blue flame that kept distracting me.
“Focus, Kitten,” Pinkie said, frowning at me. “We need to get his attention.”
“I’m terrible.”
“Good. Be terrible. Lean into it. We’re keeping the chords simple, just sing.”
Singing and playing, even simple chords was so much harder than dying. I only got a few hours nap before we were landing on a sunset-lit landing pad the size of a small island in the middle of the ocean.
“Get dressed,” Minx said, bouncing over to me.
She held up the long cotton t-shirt nightgown with a large yellow smiley face on the front.
It looked like the kind of thing you got at a big box store on clearance.
It wouldn’t be flattering, but it would be comfy. A pair of kitty cat slippers matched.
“Um. Who came up with this?” I asked, once I was dressed and feeling incredibly underdressed compared to the ninjas in armored black suits around me.
“I did,” Pinkie said with a bright smile that looked more sadistic than usual. “Slippers are important to set the appropriate mood.”
“We’re going into a villain’s fortress. You think slippers will set that mood?”
She handed me a coat made of flat black fabric that melted into one blobby shape. “You’ll wear this on the way in. Be sure to keep the hood over your hair until it’s your moment to shine.”
“She’s supposed to seduce the Prince of Beasts in that?” Felicia said, wincing at my night shirt as I pulled on the overcoat. It went down to my furry feet.
“No, she’s supposed to be shaking him out of his beast mode,” Jezebel snapped. “Seduction is the last thing we want on a monster’s mind. She’s a civilian, not a player. That’s the only way she’ll be able to play him, if he really believes that.”
“Here,” Minx said, handing me the kitten. She gave it a kiss on its soft head. “Be good Mr. Fluffles. Kitten will take good care of you. And I’ll take good care of you.” She gave me a bright smile and took a sniper rifle in her delicate hands.
I blinked at her. “You’re the sniper?”
The redhead’s smile faltered for a second before she glanced at Jezebel and then raised her chin. “I only shoot for a good cause, but yes. I tend to hit things I aim for, even when they’re very far away.”
Jezebel patted Minx’s shoulder. “You’re the best. You’ll stay with Trix and Felicia in the copter.
Pinkie’ll take the maze with Kitten, while I hit the files room.
He’s not up in the main areas where they have public gaming tables and the big ring.
So, hopefully, we can get in and out without anyone the wiser. ”
“I don’t like it,” Trixie said with a frown. “I should be down there. Nix assigned me as her bodyguard. Are you trying to protect us? We aren’t delicate flowers, no more than Pinkie.”
The cellist snorted and then smiled fondly at Trixie. “You are our escape plan. I was trained for this kind of nonsense. Besides that, it’s my girl’s night. Afterwards, tacos and karaoke. You’re going to sing something Frank Sinatra.”
Trix rolled her eyes, then headed down the steps, leading the way to the helicopter with the blades already whirling.
“Nice landing pad,” I murmured to Pinkie as I looked out over the wide ocean, lit by a stunning sunset.
“I inherited it from my grandfather. It doesn’t do much these days, but Dirk has an interesting idea about using it for…He wouldn’t want me to tell you about it. He’s very private.”
“Is he a hero or a villain?”
She sighed happily, clearly relaxed about heading for an evil fortress to steal a monster that might eat us all. “He’s both. Whatever I need, that’s what he is, and I need both.”
“What instrument does he play?”
She gave me a real smile. “Banjo.”
I stumbled as I tried to picture her with a traditional banjo player and epically failed. “How delightful.”
The helicopter ride into the sunset, but then the shadows crept over the land, or sea, and swallowed all light.
“Time for silent mode,” Jezebel said at some point as we continued riding through the pitch black.
Trixie grunted and then the helicopter went almost silent, with just a gentle beating as it whirled through the night.
I was very awake when the lights of the island came into sight.
The fortress was on the water, the enormous building well-lit.
A live band was playing by a large pool, and the party guests were laughing, talking, betting, enjoying their money in one of the most exciting gambling resorts in the world.
That’s how he sold it, as a resort, not a fortress, but I’d seen the specs.
The public areas were much less guarded, but that’s not where we needed to go.
“I don’t know about karaoke,” Minx said, aiming her rifle at all the guards as we flew silently over them.
“It’s Pinkie’s night. If she says karaoke, then we’re doing karaoke,” Trix grumbled. “Although, karaoke is an incredibly bad idea if it involves me singing.”
“Of course it’ll involve you singing,” Pinkie said. “Everyone’s going to sing. We’re going to do parts.”
“Like I’ll do the part that lacks all musicality,” Trix said drily.
“That’s the spirit,” Jezebel said, nodding approvingly before she started fastening a harness around me. “Have you got the ring?”
I nodded and looked down at my hand which was holding onto a gray kitten. “It seems wrong to bring a kitten into danger.”
“It’s a back alley cat. He’ll be fine,” Jezebel said with a bright smile. “Wait until Nix’s skin gets less of a sheen before you stab him.”
“Sure. I always wait for my husband to be relaxed before I stab him.” A memory of Nix’s mother in her death throes made me positively queasy.
“It’ll be fine,” Jezebel said, but it was a command. This was not the time for nausea.
I straightened up and nodded. “Of course it will. We’re just here to pick up Nix from this party that got a little too wild. He’ll be so glad to see me, he’ll just want to curl up and take a nap with me. I am going to nap so much when this is over.”
Jezebel wrapped a rope through a harness and tied me off. “You’ve rappelled before.”
I nodded.
“Good. Don’t drop the Kitten, and don’t accidentally stab yourself. Pinkie’s going with you before I drop. You’ll follow the ping on the map as you work your way down into the prison maze. It’s entirely populated by criminals, but happily, Nix has taken care of most of them.”
I smiled brightly. “You really know how to sell an adventure. Let’s go, Pinkie.”
She dropped out of the helicopter the next second, rappelling down to the broad roof, specifically the point where a large access panel was locked off.
She took care of the lock, clipped the panel to a rope that Jezebel raised, until the enormous thing was in the helicopter with us.
After that, I rappelled down to Pinkie, loving the rush of the night air, whirling around me as fireworks went off in the distance.
The air was balmy, and I had an adorable kitten snuggled into my chest. Maybe I’d keep it.
What was a good name for a kitten like this?
Tom? Birdie? Taco? Mr. Fluffles wasn’t edible enough.
I smiled as I went through the roof, down into the depths of the King of Macao’s gambling fortress. Taco was perfect for an adventure cat.
We hit the floor at the bottom of the stairwell suddenly. I wove a little before I found my feet, then released the rope and watched it disappear back into the sky along with Pinkie’s.
“Come on,” she murmured, heading for the nearest large iron door.
She held up her display pad, which had the map lit up in green lines, with a dot showing where we were and another dot showing Nix’s supposed location.
She inserted something into the lock. There was a small puff of smoke and then the door swung open into the creepiest place I’d ever not wanted to go.
This was a horror movie set. There were winding halls between cages, with stone walls here and there to block visibility.
There was a torture rack in the first cell.
Like a modern replication of medieval instruments of torture.
“Interesting,” Pinkie murmured before striding ahead fearlessly.
Of course she was fearless. She was a villain.
I was holding a kitten and wearing kitty cat slippers.
We passed so many cells, but most of them were empty.
Except for the torture equipment, of course.
One cell had a skinny old guy with a lot of facial hair who wore some kind of grass skirt.
“Have you seen the beast?” he whispered, big eyes full of fear. The lighting was meant for optimal creepiness, green LED’s here and there, just so it wasn’t pitch black, but not providing good visibility.
“We seek the beast,” Pinkie said in her own creepy whisper. She was the goddess of death who fit into this dungeon scene quite easily. She held out a package of jerky. “Where is he?”
He hesitated then snatched the jerky through the bars. “Everywhere.” His vicious smile showed impressively bad teeth. That jerky was supposed to be for Nix, not some annoying hula dancer.
We continued into the darkness at Pinkie’s brisk pace. Her steps were like a metronome, perfectly paced for CPR.
When she stopped, I almost ran into her.
“This isn’t right. It’s supposed to go this way, but the wall is here.” She frowned at her instrument then back at the stone wall that was clearly in the way. The only way forward was to the right.
She tapped the stone wall and then turned to me frowning. “What do you think?”
“If we break through the stone wall, it will probably draw a lot of attention.”
“It could bring the beast.” She shrugged and started to the right. Before I could follow, bars slammed down between us. Before I could do more than gasp, the floor dropped out from under my feet.