18. Liar #2
I just nodded like that made sense. No point arguing with the mental institute escapees.
When we got to the shooting range, a gorgeous redhead was waiting for us at the entrance gate.
Her bright red hair and big green eyes kind of clashed with the camouflage clothes and the semi-automatic rifle in her arms.
“We’ve got a newcomer? Hi there!” The redhead said, beaming at me like she was truly happy to see me.
“Minx. This is Kitten,” Jezebel said, taking the water out of my hand, opening it, taking a drink and then passing it back to me. “It’s not poisoned, I promise.” She winked and went through the gate to nod at the tan brunette behind the redhead who held another big gun.
“Felicia. Isn’t that a bit large for you?”
“I like them muy, muy gordo,” she said, only the word was pronounced in such a way as to make you think she was saying something else. That was a sexual innuendo right there. “Hola, nueva chica,” she said, looking me over. “Are you on the team?”
“She’s thinking about it,” Jezebel said with a broad smile at them then another wink at me. I was starting to feel weird about her winks.
“I’m the gold-digger who got Nix Death-Hammer to marry me,” I said with a bubbly smile. “It’s so nice to meet you, Felicia and Minx. Are you all part of the team too? I’m not. I just live off Nix and do absolutely nothing else. It’s the way to go.”
Everyone stared at me.
I laughed and sounded hysterical. Was it the water? It tasted mostly fine. “Joking. I’m in it for the sex. Obviously.” I took another large drink because at that point I was okay if I dropped dead.
Trixie sighed heavily and pushed me forward towards Minx, her hand as strong as the rest of her. “She’s being stalked. Nix is taking her in until he can apprehend the guy. Do you want people to hate you?” she asked me, looking troubled.
“I don’t mind it.” I wrinkled my nose because this really wasn’t going well.
“Sorry, it’s just that when Horse commented on my lack of surgical enhancements or makeup, I felt like that time in high school all over again when my best guy friend told me that my breasts weren’t good enough for him, not like Stina’s.
All of you, perfect breasts, surgically or not, and makeup so you all look like superstars although without it you’d still be absolutely stunning, it goes to my head.
I’m thirsty and tired and I don’t want to have to learn to shoot guns, I just want to go to school and paint without having to worry about the guy I’m with getting shot. Sorry. I need a nap.”
“And a taco,” Felicia said sounding sympathetic.
She came over and rubbed my arm with an expression of commiseration.
“I get it. Your feelings are valid, and you are totally justified in being frustrated. It’s not fair to be targeted when you just want to go ahead and live your life.
Now that you’ve gotten that out, do you want to learn how to shoot this cucaracha’s balls off when he comes for you again? ”
I blinked at her and took the gun she handed me, a small thing that looked insignificant in my hand. “Do I have to shoot his balls? I really don’t want to see exploded testicles ever in my life.”
Trixie snorted. “It’s not that bad. Just looks like creamed rice.”
Jezebel laughed out loud and smacked Trixie’s shoulder. “Look at that college education coming out all over the place.”
“Like creamed rice,” Felicia muttered and then burst out laughing.
“Let’s get this started. We’ve got to get finished up before eight. She needs to be home so her husband can personally demonstrate self-defense moves for Kitten,” Jezebel said, leading the way past Minx and to a field far away.
The ladies shot a lot of guns while I focused on the one little one with the redhead to help me.
She was soft-spoken and super sweet, which must have been why they had her give me lessons.
By four we were at the taco place, by six we were at the club, and by eight I was back at the Providence, me and Trix being dropped off by Jezebel who waved and shouted something about shooting testicles before she pulled out.
Trix took a deep breath and then gave me a small smile while we walked towards the lobby. “You okay? You didn’t talk a lot after you started shooting guns.”
I was so tired. After I boarded, I needed to sleep for at least a day. “I feel bad for misjudging you all. Just because you’re beautiful doesn’t mean you’re evil.”
Her smile broadened. “There does seem to be some correlation, though. Jezebel really worked hard to be her most approachable self for you today. If she winked at you one more time, I was going to have a seizure. If you really want to do some jewelry, I can get you started with it.”
“Really? Tomorrow?”
She laughed and shook her head. “No, tomorrow there’s going to be a fight at the MGM to kick off the season.”
“A fight? Nix and the team does backstage support for fighting? Like boxing?” Why was I disappointed? It’s not like you could choose the shows you had to work at a place.
“Yeah, sometimes Nix does support. Do you want to come and watch?”
I shuddered but before I could turn her down, the manly voice announcer said, “Kitten doesn’t like fights. Abhors violence of all kinds. That’s why she likes Nix so much, because at heart he’s a home health care professional who only wants to teach self-defense, not inflict pain on anyone else.”
Trixie spun around to glare at Horse. “What are you doing?”
Horse was enormous, and his blue silk shirt was open to show off a lot of his chest and dark hair. “I am walking through the lobby on my way to my destiny. Perhaps you’ve seen it? It’s the color of?—”
“Never mind,” she spat and grabbed my arm, hauling me towards the elevator while I held onto my skateboard and tried not to cry from the pressure of her fingers. Girl didn’t know her own strength.
Once we were safely in the elevator she let go of me and gave me a tiny smile. “Sorry about him. I think he’s been hit too many times in the head.”
I just smiled at her and tried not to fall asleep on my feet. Finally, she got off and I was left to go the rest of the way on my own. I was dragging so bad.
When I got to the apartment, for a second, I just leaned my head on the door with my eyes closed.
It swung open and I fell in, but Nix caught me, sweeping me into his arms and shutting the door with his foot while he carried me to his bedroom, his eyes focused on me with so much intensity that I came wide awake.
“Are you okay? Did you get shot?” he asked as he lay me carefully on his big bed and started taking off my shoes.
It was like a dream segment, so perfect, so right. Nix in the flesh, and his flesh was so beautiful, even if he had a shirt on. “Nope. The rules at the shooting range are super strict. No one’s allowed to shoot anybody. Weird, right?”
He frowned at me as he took off my second shoe and placed it carefully next to the bed. “Kitten, have you been avoiding me?”
I blinked at him and suddenly felt like crying. “Nope. We’ve just both been busy.”
“Because I’ve realized that offering you that deal couldn’t have made you feel very good. You deserve the very best, love, romance, forever with some lucky guy. You do. If I could be a different person, I would, just so that I could give you what you deserve.”
He was feeling bad about that? What a sweetheart.
I carefully ran my finger down his nose.
“Nix, I don’t want what I deserve. I just want to live in the moment with you and not worry about the future.
I also want to sleep for five years. We did shooting, tacos, and a club in just a few hours.
I think they all have supernatural stamina.
I don’t.” I’d love to be in his arms until the end of the world.
Was he okay with that? I really needed him, just to hold me, just for tonight.
He sighed. “I’m just glad you didn’t get shot. Kitten, do you mind sleeping in my bed with me? I really liked waking up with you in my arms in the morning.”
I swallowed and stared at him. It’s like he could read my mind. “Really? You want to snuggle with me?”
He nodded soberly. “If you don’t mind. We’re going to be together for six months. Would it be okay if I courted you?”
A wash of electricity went through me as I beamed at him and my whole soul did a happy dance. “Much better than okay. I’ve never been courted before.”
He pulled me into his arms so my head was resting on his shoulder. “First, let’s start with basics. What are all your favorites?”
“Pizza and tacos.”
“Flowers?”
“Tulips. Yellow.”
“Car.”
“Camaro. Yellow.”
“T-shirt. Smiley-face. Yellow. I think I’m sensing a subtle theme. You really have the right name because you are sunshine. So much sweet sunshine that I am grateful I get to soak up, even if it isn’t forever.”
For a second my heart ached. “I need to get in my pajamas and brush my teeth,” I said into his neck. Also take my meds. So many pills. If he was Beastie, I’d ask him to get them for me. Maybe I should tell him.
He rolled off the bed, taking me with him. The movement was so smooth, he didn’t jostle me at all, and soon enough, he had me perched on the bathroom counter like old times. It was a very large bathroom counter.
“This isn’t my bathroom,” I said, but I was smiling. He was just so good, so right, and I’d missed him. I kissed his nose.
“Can I move your things in here?” he asked, looking directly into my eyes. “Then you can use the extra room as your painting studio.”
Was I actually going to sleep in his bed every night?
Would that be okay? I smiled and shrugged.
“Okay.” If he saw my stuff, my needles, then we’d have a conversation.
Maybe I did want to tell him the situation.
Maybe he deserved to know. If he was feeling guilty about having a cold and heartless marriage, then how could I not feel guilty for not telling him all the details so he didn’t have to feel bad about it?
He was a good man. The best. I was definitely going to hell for taking advantage of him.
Oh well. I could cope with hell. My life on bad days was exactly that. I was born for it.