Chapter 38
Adora
My sheets are too cold. Or too hot. I don’t know. All I know is they’re malfunctioning and pissing me off. That’s the only reasonable explanation for why I can’t sleep and keep tossing in bed.
Poor Gary left me hours ago, thoroughly offended by my refusal to stay still and let him sprawl across my shoulder.
I tap my fingers against the mattress, staring at nothing, a desperate itch crawling under my skin.
It’s the first night in weeks I’m not sleeping at the hospital. I miss that stupid bed next to Dominic’s, the one Bones probably paid a fortune for. The mattress must’ve been better, and now I’m addicted to it.
“Why the fuck am I lying to myself?” I mutter, fisting the sheet.
That’s the mental slap I need.
I tried. I really fucking tried. But I have no idea how to take things slow with Dominic, especially after everything that happened. Impulses be damned. I’ll deal with it in therapy.
Less than an hour later, I’m walking away from Dominic’s truck, which recently became mine, and using my spare key to unlock one of the six brand-new one-bedroom cabins scattered around the clubhouse.
It’s where I left Dominic a few hours ago after his release from the hospital.
The cabin is small and cozy, very similar to a studio apartment — table to the right, kitchenette to the left, a room divider hiding the king-size bed, and a bathroom.
That’s about it. But the entire back wall is practically a huge floor-to-ceiling window, creating the illusion of a much bigger space, and that’s perfect for Dominic.
He can’t use his room inside the clubhouse yet because stairs are his number one enemy right now. So Bones suggested this cabin, and at the time, it felt like a good idea. Mostly because I was dangerously close to dragging him home with me.
Gary meows in my arms as I push the door open and stride inside. He meows again when I jolt, startled by Dominic sitting at the small table to the right of the door. He’s gripping the edge of it, breathing hard, staring at me like I’m a hallucination.
I recover quickly, kick the door shut behind me, and set Gary down so he can explore. Then I cross my arms and glare.
“What the hell are you doing up? You’re supposed to be resting,” I say, one brow lifting.
He squeezes his eyes shut and drags in a big breath before answering.
“I was coming to you.”
My mouth drops open. How insane is this man?
“You can’t drive, much less ride a bike, Dominic,” I point out. “And I didn’t see anyone outside waiting for you.”
He presses his lips together, frustration rolling off him in waves.
“Yeah, I realized I’d need help,” he mutters. “I was going to call Bones before you came in.”
A slow smile spreads across my face.
“I left over four hours ago. It took you that long to figure that out?”
He glares, unimpressed, mumbling something under his breath that I don’t quite catch.
I step closer, stopping beside him, and run my fingers through his messy hair. I hope I never see him this helpless again, but I can’t deny there’s something… endearing about it.
“What did you say?” I ask, still smiling.
He groans and leans into my touch, eyes drifting closed.
“I said I fell asleep right after you left,” he murmurs. “The drive from the hospital wiped me out.” He opens his eyes and looks up at me, frowning. “You left me, adorable. I’m hurt and in pain. How am I supposed to heal all alone?”
I lean down and brush my lips over his forehead in a featherlight kiss.
He got this clingy and whiny when he was recovering from Temperance’s spanking, too. But curiously, I’ve never seen him act like this with anyone else. Not even Mama. He had plenty of chances in the hospital, but he kept it locked in every time, until it was just the two of us.
“You can dial down the drama now,” I whisper. “Come on. You need to get into bed. The doctor said you’ll need a lot of rest for the next few weeks.”
“It’s not drama if it’s the truth,” he says, a small smile tugging at his mouth.
He slips an arm around my waist and pushes to his feet slowly, wincing halfway up.
“I missed you,” he whispers once he’s upright, his other hand coming up to cradle the side of my neck.
He leans in before I can answer, brushing his lips against mine. His tongue glides along the seam of my lips, asking, and I open for him without a second thought.
We’ve spent the past two weeks like this — kissing and touching without hesitation or awkwardness, like there was never any distance between us.
This man is dangerous for me. Dangerous to have, but even more dangerous to miss.
My fingers curl into his t-shirt as I savor the kiss, getting lost in the softness of his mouth. His scent falls around me like rain. Firewood and leather, pulling me deeper. Demanding. Igniting.
My eyes snap open when his breathing stutters.
Shit. We can’t get carried away. Not yet.
I break the kiss and lean back, barely holding in the shiver that threatens to run through me.
“You’re in luck,” I murmur, my voice a little husky. “I’ve decided I’m moving in to watch over you. Someone has to make sure you follow the doctor’s orders.”
He drops his forehead to mine with a satisfied groan, like I just handed him the best news of his life.
“Thank you,” he whispers. Then he lifts his head, grin turning wicked. “Now, what can I do to convince you to wear a sexy nurse outfit during my recovery? I guarantee it’ll speed things up tenfold.”
I roll my eyes and nudge him forward, guiding him toward the bed in the back, where Gary is currently sniffing the pillows.
“You wouldn’t be able to handle me in a sexy nurse outfit,” I tease, keeping a steady hold on his arm as we walk. “And just so you know, there won’t be any ‘no clothes in bed’ rule either. Not until you get the all-clear from the doctor.”
He stops abruptly beside the bed and turns to me, eyes wide, horror flashing across his face.
“Are you saying I need a doctor’s note to see you naked?”
The scandalized tone makes me chuckle.
“You sure do,” I confirm with a slow nod.
He huffs, lowering himself onto the edge of the bed before carefully shifting into position. For now, he has to sleep at an angle to keep the pain at bay.
Gary watches him curiously, then stretches his neck to sniff his arm.
Dominic absently scratches the little void’s head, and, miraculously, Gary doesn’t hiss or pull away.
He starts purring. The sight of Dominic’s hand moving through the black fur like it’s habit, almost overwhelms me.
For a second, I see the future that I stopped believing in, unfolding right in front of me.
I force myself to shake it off and clear my throat.
“I’ll grab mine and Gary’s stuff from the car,” I say, already heading for the door.
It doesn’t take long to settle everything. Before I know it, I’m sliding into bed beside Dominic, listening to Gary crunch through the fresh kibble I left out for him.
I keep a careful distance so I don’t accidentally hit Dominic in my sleep, but my hand finds its way to his. Our fingers intertwine in the dark, thumbs brushing softly against each other.
“Good night, adorable. I love you.”
His voice is quiet, filled with the same peace I hear every time he says those three words to me. And he’s been saying them a lot since he woke up. Like he’s trying to make up for all the times he held them back.
I like hearing them, but every time I do, panic flares in my chest. It’s the same now, and it’s enough to chase the sleep from my eyes.
A long-ass time later, I’m still lying there, blinking furiously at the dark, glaring at nothing, annoyed as hell with the thoughts ravaging my mind.
“I can hear you thinking.” Dominic’s voice startles me. He squeezes my hand, as if in reassurance before he speaks again. “What’s wrong?”
I turn onto my side, facing him. “Did I wake you up?”
I can’t see him in the pitch-black room, but his fingers tighten around mine.
“I didn’t fall asleep,” he murmurs. “Now tell me what’s going on in that head of yours. Something’s bothering you.”
“How the hell did you know?” I whisper, disbelief heavy in my tone.
“Your breathing. And you’ve been wiggling your toes nonstop.” I can hear the smile in his voice. “Stop avoiding it. Tell me.” A brief pause. “Rule number two, remember?”
Dammit. He just had to bring out the big guns.
I exhale sharply, trying to release the frustration scratching at my brain. Then I rush the words out so fast, it feels like my lips are tripping over each other.
“I can’t say the three words back to you.
You know which ones. You keep saying them, and I like it.
But no matter what, it’s impossible for me to say them.
” I squeeze his fingers. My voice drops to a whisper.
“I know it’s still early for us this time around, but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to say them to you, Dominic.
And I don’t want you to expect something that might never come. ”
My heart stutters when his fingers slip from mine, but settles when his hand comes back, wrapping around mine completely.
“Is that why you’ve been overworking your toes?” he asks lightly.
He doesn’t sound upset. It makes me frown.
His tone shifts, turning serious. “Stop overthinking, Adora. We both know why you can’t say them. But I don’t need the words anyway. I just need you.”
He yawns, then exhales deeply before speaking again, his thumb brushing over my hand.
“If you really want to, you can just spit in my drink once in a while. To let me know how you feel.”
The absolute solemnity in his voice makes me huff out a quiet laugh.
“Okay,” I murmur, smiling now. “It’s a deal.”
He yawns again, and this time I can’t stop myself from following. The sound of Gary jumping down from somewhere briefly registers. The panic in my chest loosens its grip, and peace settles around me once again, warmer now. My toes stop moving, and my eyelids grow heavy.
“Good night, Dominic,” I murmur, already drifting.
“Good night, adorable. I love you,” he answers, voice rough with sleep.