Chapter 32
Braedon second-guesses his choice to spend another night away from home.
If he were with his father, they might be out looking for Teddy.
He might be able to help. And then he wonders if what Sue said is true.
When the police are investigating something, do they spend most of their time on the computer?
Maybe Grandpa Judd retired before that happened, and Dad doesn’t realize he should be using a computer.
What does he know anyway? He’s just a soccer player and coach.
Maybe Braedon can be of some help after all.
He opens the photos app on his computer and scrolls through the pictures until he finds a good one of Teddy.
He’s sitting next to Judd on their birthday, a cake on the table before them, with a whole mess of lit candles on it.
Braedon duplicates the photo, then edits out everything but Teddy’s head.
Long gray hair and a big smile. Braedon then copies the photo into Google and does a reverse-image search.
If Teddy went up to the cities to see friends, maybe one of them posted a picture of it on Instagram.
If he got in trouble and got arrested in some other town, maybe his mug shot will show up.
The kind of picture where a person stands in front of a height chart.
Or if Teddy got conked on the head and has amnesia and wandered into some other town, maybe the local newspaper wrote an article about it.
NEW MAN IN TOWN CAN’T REMEMBER WHO HE IS.
That would be the headline and there would be a picture of Teddy under it.
And then it will be Braedon who finds Uncle Teddy.
Not his father. Not his grandpa Judd. Even though they’re the ones out there looking for Teddy, Braedon will be the hero.
Because he’s the one who had the idea to do the reverse-image search. Thanks to Sue, that is.
But the search yields only a few results. All of them Instagram posts by Deb. The most recent one was last Christmas. No mug shots. No newspaper articles. No posts of Teddy at a concert up in the cities. Nothing.
Braedon sits with his disappointment for a few minutes. He’s about to close the laptop and call it a night when the idea comes out of nowhere. Of course. It’s so obvious. So sensible. So … duh. Why didn’t he think of it earlier? Braedon reopens his photos app and begins to search.
“Something feels wrong,” says Judd.
“With us?” says Mei.
Mei’s condo is a ten-minute walk from the Gonda Building of the Mayo Clinic.
Three bedrooms, two and a half baths, and wall-to-wall white carpet throughout except for the bathrooms and kitchen.
Not off-white. Not linen-white. White. Shoes have never touched it, nor have bare feet with their oils and barnacles.
The walls are also white but covered in art, much of it Chinese, as is most of the furniture and things displayed in glass cabinets.
“God, no,” says Judd. “Everything with us is…” He shakes his head.
“What?” says Mei.
“I hesitate to use the word … But everything with us is perfect.”
“Oh, it is not,” says Mei. “Don’t say that if you don’t mean it.”
They’re in Mei’s queen-size bed in her king-size master suite, their naked bodies under the silk duvet as they lie on their sides facing each other. Judd reaches out and cups Mei’s cheek in his palm.
“I do mean it. You’re a doctor. That’s job security. Plus if one of our perfect sessions in the bedroom gives me a heart attack, you’ll know what to do. And you live and work half an hour away so I don’t have to worry about you barging into my place all the time.”
“Stop it,” says Mei. She laughs and grabs Judd’s wrist so he doesn’t take his hand away, then she pulls it toward her lips, kisses it, and puts it back where she found it. “So what feels wrong?”
“You know,” says Judd. “Teddy. I don’t know what it is but something’s not adding up.
Maybe it’s a twin thing. I can feel it but I don’t know what it is.
My cop sense is on code red. My Teddy sense is on code red.
But I’m not putting the pieces together.
It makes me feel like the city council was right.
It was time for me to move on. I can’t do the job like I used to. ”
“Maybe it’s a blessing,” says Mei.
“How is not being able to find my brother a blessing?” He says this with a smile so she understands that his question comes from hope and is not belittling her idea.
“It’s not that you haven’t found Teddy that’s a blessing. It’s that you’re not working as a police officer.”
“Okay…”
“Let’s start with the irrefutable evidence,” says Mei. “Your relationship with Clay seems to have improved.”
Judd wishes he could tell Mei that Clay worked as an intelligence agent while playing soccer in Europe, but that would not only be inappropriate, it could get Clay and him in a whole lot of trouble.
In a way, Clay’s admission helped heal things between father and son.
That and Clay moving back and bringing Braedon with him.
But more than anything, Judd’s owning up to his parental shortcomings.
He’ll tell Mei about it sometime but not tonight.
It’s too late for that conversation. Instead he simply says, “Yep. Clay and I are getting along a little better.”
“Have you two talked about it?”
“Our relationship?”
“Yes, your relationship.”
“God, no,” says Judd. “We don’t talk about things like that.”
“Why not?”
“Well, I suppose it’s because we don’t know how to.
Clay and me, we’ve been at odds with each other since he was born.
If he was crying in his crib and his mother picked him up, he settled right down.
But if I picked him up, he screamed like I was pulling his fingernails out with pliers.
And things between us deteriorated from there. ”
“Maybe,” says Mei, “you just need some time in this better state, some time getting along, and then you’ll be able to talk about your relationship.”
“Maybe,” says Judd, “but talking about it just might wreck it.”
“Why would talking wreck it?”
“Eh, it’s a guy thing,” says Judd. “Sometimes the less said, the better. No risk of embarrassment.”
“You don’t treat me like that,” says Mei. She nudges Judd onto his back and rests her head on his chest. “You told me you loved me after only knowing me four months. You opened yourself up to the possibility of all kinds of embarrassment.”
“That’s different,” says Judd. “If you had rejected me, we would have gone our separate ways. Probably would’ve never seen each other again. Then I could have buried my shame deep, pretend I hadn’t met you, go on living my life with dignity.”
“Stop.” Mei laughs.
Judd kisses her on the top of the head and says, “Let’s talk about something else.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know. Something fun. Want to go on a trip together?
” Judd catches himself and adds, “You know, after we find Teddy.” The light dims in his eyes, and he adds, “I just keep thinking he’s going to walk into his doublewide and Deb will call to tell me he’s back.
This kind of thing, Teddy disappearing, it’s happened a hundred times before.
It happened when we were kids. He knew he was in trouble and would hide out in a friend’s tree house or down by the river for a few hours.
My parents called all over town trying to find out where he was.
Teddy’s real good at not being found when he sets his mind to it.
But he always comes home. He’s trained me into thinking that way.
” Judd shifts his head on the pillow. “But I’m scared to death that this time is different. ”
Mei doesn’t respond right away in case Judd wants to say more.
When he doesn’t, she says, “Of course you’re scared.
You’re a human being. And yes I want to go on a trip together when the time is right.
But I don’t want to stop talking about you and Clay.
You two have a chance to heal your relationship through this crisis, and talking about that will only help. ”
“I don’t want to dump my garbage on you.”
“It’s not garbage and you’re not dumping it. You’re opening up and sharing yourself with me. I’m here to support you. To help. Here.” Mei lifts her head from Judd’s chest and says, “Let’s trade places.” She rolls onto her back. “Put your head on my shoulder. Come on.”
Judd looks at her. Dubious and uncertain.
“Do it, Judd. You’re always taking care of everyone else. First Teddy, then Pam, then Clay. And the whole town of Riverwood. You deserve to feel what it’s like when someone takes care of you.” She pats her shoulder with her free hand. “Doctor’s orders.”
Judd lowers his head onto Mei’s shoulder as if it’s made of nitroglycerin. One wrong move and everything will blow up. But when he feels his weight sink into her, when his cheek rests against her skin, it feels impossibly right.
“There,” says Mei. “That’s better. Just stay like that for a while.” Mei runs a hand over Judd’s buzz cut and draws him into her.
He wants to say thank you but is afraid Mei will hear the tears in his voice.
He tries to breathe through it when his phone buzzes on the nightstand.
Judd keeps his head on Mei’s shoulder while reaching over to grab it.
He holds it at arm’s length so his sixty-three-year-old eyes can see the screen clearly. Or at least clearly enough.
“It’s Braedon,” says Judd. “I’d better answer it.”