Chapter 24
LIBBY
I head down to the rink when I have a break in my meetings since I know Jordan will be there.
He’s kept his distance all day, not coming up to poke his head into my office when he got to the arena like he usually does, and I know he’s trying to give me space since his confession.
I don’t want space from him. It’s selfish to seek him out, because he probably needs space from me as well if we can’t be a real couple.
He sits in the bleachers, high enough up to have a good view of the practice. He’s leaning forward, eyes on the team, taking in everything with concentration. He’s focused enough that I’m close by the time he sees me.
He stands, his face lighting up, and I melt at his reaction. He comes forward quickly but then hesitates the tiniest bit before he reaches me. “Hug?” he mouths.
I nod. “Of course,” I mouth back.
He wraps his arms around me, pulling me into him. I tighten my hold around his waist and breathe him in. The day has been good, but busy. It’s nice to just be for a moment.
“How’s the team?” I ask when we pull away without the usual light kiss. I need to distract myself from my disappointment and believe in the “little bits” of trust that will come every day with Jordan.
“The coaches are smart. Do the bigwigs still have Andrew on the list?” He nods down to the assistant coach, who’s stepped in during the interim since the former head coach retired.
“He is.”
“I think he should be at the top. He knows the guys, and he knows the game.” He rests his hand lightly on my back as we turn and watch the team skate, then after a moment drops it.
“He’s not a hundred percent on board with the reality TV show.
” I grimace. Andrew Cooper is a great candidate.
If Jordan thinks he’s the best for the job, I’m tempted to give it to him now.
But I also can’t have him fighting with the show’s producers all the time or spend too much of my time stepping in to get the show access to the team.
“Bet he’d get on board if he knew a job like this depended on it.” Jordan chuckles. There’s a strain to his expression that belies the joking sentence.
I reach up without thinking and grip Jordan’s arm. “Hey, I’ll make sure he gets a fair shot. I promise, the decision for the coach of this team won’t be made based on his aversion to reality TV.”
“Okay?” Jordan tilts his head at me. “I know you’ll give weight to the best candidates.”
I drop my hand. “You looked stressed about it.”
Understanding dawns. “Oh. Yeah, that’s about something else.” His jaw clenches.
“What’s up?”
“Let’s go home so I can make dinner. I’ll tell you on the way.”
I love the way he says “go home,” almost as much as I loved the way he told me to come back to bed this morning. I also love that going home means going to our apartment, where we don’t have to be anyone but ourselves. No acting, no pressure, just us being honest with each other.
“Sounds amazing.” I drop my voice. “Hold hands?” I ask.
In answer, he smirks at me and reaches for my hand. I won’t apologize for needing this closeness when I can’t give him more, even though I want to. He’s assured me that he wants to be here with me, even though it’s costing him.
Jordan drove his truck to the arena. Our vehicles arrived yesterday with the rest of our stuff.
He leads me to it, opening my door for me.
His hands rise to my waist as I reach for the grab handle to climb in; then they quickly drop, and he stuffs his hands in his pocket.
He waits for me to settle in my seat and then shuts the door behind me.
The way he just held himself back? Kinda hot.
“So, what’s got you stressed?” I ask when he’s gotten in on the driver’s side. “Besides me.” I wink at him.
Jordan laughs quietly. “You don’t stress me out.” He starts the truck. “I called Mitchell Hurst today about the claim he made with Redhaven Foundation. It’s the largest one, so I want to take care of it first so we can see how much more we need to fundraise.”
“If his claim is legit, I’m paying it,” I say.
“Anyway,” Jordan goes on, ignoring me except for his lips twitching into a smile again. “He said he closed that account shortly after he paid Bryce and the bank can’t find the records.”
“That’s not suspicious at all,” I say dryly.
“Yeah. I pressed him. Asked him to get me contact info. He said he’d text me the information.
I can’t shake that there’s something weird going on here—but then I wonder if that’s because I didn’t like Mitchell back in high school.
” He taps his fingers against the steering wheel when we stop at a red light.
“It definitely sounds like there’s something weird.”
“I know.” He lets out a long sigh. “But if we turned down everyone I had a beef with in Redhaven, there’s at least a dozen people who wouldn’t have gotten reimbursed.”
“No way are there a dozen people in Redhaven who don’t like you. You’re too good.”
He scoffs. “I won’t talk you out of those rose-colored glasses. They’ll work in my favor eventually. I was a teenaged boy once. And a rowdy twenty-year-old. There are a few people out there who aren’t fans of Jordan Atkinson.”
“Is it okay if I hold your hand again?” I ask.
After talking to Ellie today, I have faith that eventually Jordan and I will get to a point where we can be a real couple.
It means I’m only afraid of doing the coupley things because I know they stretch his patience for what he really wants. “In a friendly way, of course.”
“Always okay. As friends,” he adds, his voice teasing.
I reach over and wrap my hand in his. I love the way his huge hands dwarf mine. It’s one of those things about him that makes me feel safe.
“I bet you have a lot fewer enemies in this world now that you saved a whole small town,” I say.
“Maybe,” he concedes. He looks over at me as we stop at another red light. “But to be fair, I’ve also gained a few since meeting you. Mr. Stevens, the whole governing board, that one guy who’s in prison.”
I can’t help a laugh. “That one guy?”
“I’m not going to say his name. Ever. He doesn’t deserve it.” He fake gags, and I laugh at his expression.
We fall into comfortable conversation after that about our days.
Mostly I fill him in on the meetings I had and the calls I made.
I’m already arranging “Devils Night” for one of our early games next month.
Ellie said she’d recruit some guys to come and be VIPs.
She wants to get their new quarterback some good press and says this kind of thing will be perfect.
When we get home, the movers are gone and the house is unpacked. It already looks like a home. There are wedding portraits on the walls and prints of the candid shots we took to fake six months of secret dating.
It feels so real.
Jordan gets right to work on something quick that’s still delicious—breakfast burritos. I’m always a fan of breakfast for dinner. Also always a fan of Jordan’s cooking. I should probably start making a list of the things I lucked out on, besides his hockey brilliance, when I hired him.
New best friend might be top of the list.
Until we upgrade that relationship to something even better.
“How about we skip watching hockey tonight and watch a movie instead,” Jordan says as we’re cleaning up the kitchen. I tried to kick him out—let me do the cleaning since he cooked—but he won’t have any of it. “You choose,” he says.
“You’ll watch anything I pick?” I ask, drying the pan he used to scramble the eggs and then hang it above the stove.
“Absolutely.”
I tap a finger against my chin. “What about Another Cinderella Story?”
“Sure.” He doesn’t grimace or cringe or even miss a beat.
“Really.” I can’t help that his total lack of reaction surprises me.
“Why not?” He snaps the dishwasher shut and turns to me, completely confused.
“Because it’s kind of a cheesy teen movie.” I lean back against the counter and eye him.
“You love it?” he asks.
I smile, thinking of watching that show with my sisters every weekend. “Yeah.”
“Why would I be bugged doing something with you that you love?”
“You are a marvel,” I say, trying to sound lighthearted, except I mean every word. Is it any wonder that sometimes I’m scared he’s too good to be true?
“No.” He stays on his side of the kitchen, but his expression is intense. “Just someone who wants to be with you.”
“Okay,” I reply, my voice breathless. “Let’s go watch a movie.”