4 Library #2
I looked at my phone, then told Lennie, “Len, that’s my pop, I have to go. I’ll catch you later?”
I searched her face for the okay, but I didn’t have to look too hard. She didn’t care if I was lying, or leaving. She only cared about the girl beside her.
Main Street was busier than usual, with all the extra tourists posing in this perfect fall light.
I opened my phone to scroll through TikTok as I walked home.
I noticed my algorithm had changed in only a day, and I was watching this cute video of “Cool things to do in London” when someone banged into me and my phone flew from my hand.
I scrambled to pick it up just as a hand reached down to help me.
“Maybe take your phone out of your face once in a while?”
I knew that condescending tone before I even saw his face.
Theo.
“Why weren’t you watching where you were going?” I snapped. “Are you stalking me or something?”
Theo snorted. “Stalking you? This town is so small that there’s no way to avoid you …”
“Right.” I was icy with wounded pride.
“I was just coming out of the hardware store,” he told me, bending down to pick up what he’d obviously dropped when we bumped: wood filler, putty knife, wood glue. I bent down too, unable to stop myself. I was helpful and thoughtful, like most people in my hometown.
We reached for a small bag of screws at the same time, and when I grabbed them first, his hand rested on mine. Warm and soft. Not like I’d expected at all. He snatched it away as we both stood up.
“What do you need a putty knife for?”
From behind his glasses, his eyes flicked down to mine. “How do you know what a putty knife is?”
Someone else barged into me—a tourist with a selfie stick—and Theo put his hand on my arm to keep me steady. Once again, I had involuntary shivers.
“My pop’s the Oak Falls fix-it guy,” I explained. “But even if he wasn’t, why wouldn’t I know what a putty knife was?” Sexist as well as rude.
“It’s just quite specific, was all I meant. Are you going to the library?” He nodded down the street, and I found myself nodding before following him.
“So why do you need all the tools?” I jogged so I was walking beside him.
“I need to fix that window. I can’t concentrate.”
I had noticed a draft when we were there the other day, but weren’t libraries meant to be old, drafty places? Another thing he’d found wrong with us. Jo was going to love this.
“I’ll ask my pop, you don’t need to—”
“It’s fine. It won’t take long, I’ve already asked the woman at the desk.”
“Her name is Jo. Is this like … a good deed you’re doing to make up for being so rude?” It came out of my mouth before I could stop it.
“Excuse me?” He stopped and pushed his glasses up his nose, waiting for an explanation, even though it was pretty obvious. To me anyway.
“You were rude. About the town, and you were rude to Jo too …” My words trailed off as his expression changed. A smirk.
“Oh, that’s what this is. Of course. Small-town America, where everyone knows each other and people don’t pay for things in real money, just favors and baked goods …”
“And what’s wrong with that?” I demanded. I kept Mrs. Burrows’s banana cream pie payments to myself.
“It’s not real life,” Theo told me. “And no, it wasn’t because I was rude, even though I don’t think I was rude. Rude is more like throwing yourself into someone’s arms when they’re not expecting it and making them pull a muscle in their back.”
“That was actually your fault …”
“And rude is trying to trip someone in the street when they’re just planning to fix a window. Or maybe those are just the rules where I’m from.” With that he started walking again. Faster this time.
I caught up with him. “I didn’t throw myself into your arms. I fell, because you tried to murder me by knocking me off a ladder.
And I wouldn’t be going to the library unless I absolutely needed to, so don’t act like I’m following you.
And I’m glad you’re fixing the window beside my seat.
I can’t wait to get hours of work done there … ”
And then I walked even faster than him, all the way to the library, grabbing a book at random for something to read before I sat down at our desk. It was thankfully more than big enough for two, so I didn’t have to sit too close to him, or give him the satisfaction of finding another desk.
I tried to steady my breathing before he got there. He strode smoothly around the corner, carrying his tools, his clothes all dark and proper like some kind of European fashion model.
That was when I stared down at the book I’d grabbed when I walked in. Oh God … In too much of a rush, I’d picked up a romance on my way through. I opened to a random page, hiding the cover, and blushed at the graphic detail. But I kept on reading.
From the corner of my eye I could see Theo take off his coat, hanging it carefully on the back of a chair. Then he pulled off his black sweater to reveal a bright white T-shirt.
I’d thought he was skinny, but he was lean. It was clear that the muscles that strained as he worked on the window were seriously used to manual labor.
I looked back down and blushed again. In the book, the protagonist and one of the love interests were getting it on in a hospital closet.
“Enjoying your book?” Theo asked. Was he mocking me?
“Yeah, it’s really interesting, I’m learning a lot,” I said. I looked back at the page, trying to keep my face straight, and breathed a sigh of relief when he turned back to the window.
I took my chance to get up, to go to the actual nonfiction section, and to subtly trade this book for something about, I don’t know, politics. But just as I got up, I knocked the novel and it landed cover up on the floor.
And there he was, already bending down to pick it up.
“Playing Doctor?” he said with a smirk as he handed the book to me. I was basically turning purple now.
I pressed the book cover to my chest. “It’s about the health care system of many different countries,” I explained. “A comparison, that is.”
“Oh, really?” He raised his eyebrows.
“Yes. Really. I’m just going to …” I picked up my bag, pointed to the door, and started to walk toward it. I’d tried. But I couldn’t, just couldn’t, be here with him.
“Are you going to that festival thing next week?” Theo called from behind me.
Well, that was a surprise. I turned and said, “Yeah, everyone goes. Why?”
He shrugged, then put his hands in his pockets and leaned on the edge of the table. “No reason.” He nodded at the book I was clutching. “Enjoy your reading, Willa.”
I couldn’t flick my hair properly anymore, not now that it was short and under my hat.
But I tried my best, and I stormed out of the library, past a confused-looking Jo and into the wind.
And even the wind irritated me, because it reminded me of the smirking, condescending, said-my-name-in-a-really-cute-way jackass I’d had the misfortune of meeting.
I looked at the copy of Playing Doctor, which I hadn’t officially checked out, hid it in my schoolbag, and tried not to give Theo any headspace for the whole walk home.
No such luck.