Chapter 16 Wedding Eve
Wedding Eve
On the night before the wedding, Tam was alone in her house wondering if it was normal to feel numb rather than excited.
Her mother was at the family home with Davina, both of them busy going over the many plans for the next day.
Tam had put them both off – and Natasha – from inspecting the dress hanging up in her bedroom.
The next time they would see her would be at the church.
The bridesmaids were having their hair and make-up done at the Bullivant family home where Natasha could direct, boss, dictate.
Tam had insisted she get ready alone, citing that it was a bride’s prerogative to surprise.
Harris obviously couldn’t see her tonight, because it wasn’t the done thing to see the bride before the wedding.
He did ring, though, to say that he was looking forward to their big day, which is what she needed to hear.
Oh and . . . he knew it was tradition for the bride to run late but could she please not, because it would make his mother anxious if the timings were out.
Apparently, anxiety could irritate her bladder.
Tam promised that she wouldn’t, but it was a flat end to the call.
The last words should have been ‘I love you’, not ‘possible urinary infection’.
She put down the phone and it hit her that this would be her last night as a single woman living in her single house.
Tomorrow, she would be sleeping in a five-star honeymoon suite in a hotel, and the day after she would be in Harris’s apartment and her little mews house would then be going up for sale along with all her memories of moving in here, painting the walls in crazy shades, of watching box sets on her massive squashy lime-green sofa with Walter asleep on her knee.
She put her phone on the charging station and picked up the felted cat that she’d put on the shelf.
She cuddled it and wished the real Walter was still here.
She wanted another cat so much, but Harris didn’t want to have hairs all over his clothes.
Plus they made him sneeze. Something else she would have to compromise on.
She would have to settle for felted Walter then, and she would make sure that he was on display in their home, however much Harris moaned about it.
A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts and Tam found Meredith on her doorstep.
She looked pale and, despite it being a warm summer evening, she was shivering.
Tam brought her inside and Meredith’s eyes roved over the space, from the huge almost fluorescent sofa to the ornate mini chandelier in the lounge, two of the last vestiges of how things once were.
‘This has changed from the last time I came here,’ Meredith said. ‘It used to be like walking into a rainbow.’
‘I’ve got it ready to sell,’ explained Tam. ‘Buyers like a blank canvas. Please, have a seat.’
Meredith perched nervously. Tam waited for her to say what she was here for, but no sooner had her bottom touched the cushion than she stood up.
‘I shouldn’t be here. Not today. I’m so sorry. I should go.’
‘Meredith, sit down and talk to me,’ Tam said firmly, pressing her down on to the squishy sofa. What on earth could she want? A riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma packed in a puzzle and tied with a brainteaser bow, as one of her lecturers at uni used to say.
Tam wasn’t expecting her next words, which came out in such a hurried jumble one might have been excused for thinking they were unauthorised lyrics to ‘Flight of the Bumblebee’.
‘I’m leaving Jame. Tomorrow. After your wedding.
He doesn’t know, he doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with our relationship.
’ She gave a small laugh at the absurdity of that.
‘I wanted to apologise to you in advance in case I don’t see you again.
I didn’t want to spoil your day but the timings line up on my side, so it has to be tomorrow.
I think you’ll understand. You’ve always been so kind to me and I’m really sorry about this.
Oh my, I don’t know what I was thinking of, coming here. ’
Tam reached for her hands, which were shaking and cold to the touch.
‘Oh Meredith, I get it, I really do,’ she said gently, because she was glad that Meredith was escaping the whale’s mouth before it finally swallowed her; it had been chewing the life out of her for too long. ‘Do you have somewhere to go?’
Meredith nodded. ‘Yes, it’s all sorted. I’m staying near my sister in Derbyshire.’
‘Good for you.’
Meredith laughed in great relief, and Tam saw a flicker of something, like a speck of life, in her eyes.
‘You know, I used to sing around the house,’ Meredith said. ‘Singing was my happy thing. Looking back, I think that was the start of it. Jame asking me to stop because the noise was annoying him. I’ve been singing like a lark since I decided to leave him.’
Tam made Meredith a coffee and she sat there drawing the warmth from the mug, opening up her heart. Tam’s brother really was the most awful bully. She was glad Meredith had woken up to it.
Eventually, Meredith stood up. ‘I’ve said too much, I should go. Thank you for listening to me. You have no idea how glad I am you understand. I don’t think anyone else will miss me on Sundays. I don’t think I care, though.’
At the door, Tam gave her a firm hug, but she had to ask. ‘What was it that finally made you make the change, Meredith?’
‘That day at your parents’ house, when I said to you that you were more invisible than me.
It was like I was seeing myself, my situation, for the first time .
. . in you. I knew then I had to start making plans.
’ Meredith took her hand and squeezed it.
‘Don’t fade your colours for anyone, Tam,’ she said fiercely, and with that she turned and left.
Tam closed the door and sagged against it, her back pressed into the wood, turning Meredith’s words over in her brain.
Her relationship with Harris was nothing like Meredith’s with Jame.
Harris only wanted the best for her, he always had her best interests at heart.
He suggested improvements to her for her benefit.
They weren’t the same, they really weren’t.